Search found 226 matches

by JET73L
Thu Jul 31, 2008 1:36 am UTC
Forum: General
Topic: Making the world a weirder place
Replies: 1920
Views: 134377

Re: Making the world a weirder place

I'm trying to plan a stunt at the university, for the beginning of next semester, where we chalk different scenes from video games in a pixellated grid. A Galaga scene on a great perfect north-south stretch of sidewalk, a battle scene from Zelda2: The Adventure of Link on a short, wide east-west pat...
by JET73L
Thu Jul 31, 2008 12:55 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

..."Sure, but it;ll take me a day or so."
:shock:

Jesus, Moses, and an old guy are playing golf...

(there are several ways this can be ruined, even before the punchline)
by JET73L
Wed Jul 30, 2008 1:47 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Real punchline: "Who;s he going to tell?"
Ruin-a-joke punchline: "Hey, he's pretty cool for a mortal, and I did intend for Sunday to be a day of rest. He should be golfing instead of at work."

WHat do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a pogo stick?
by JET73L
Tue Jul 29, 2008 3:32 am UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0245: "Floor Tiles"
Replies: 252
Views: 62947

Re: "Floor Tiles" Discussion

This is awful. I finaly managed to stabilize my walking habint in the path to the library, anf the paths between the buildings in which my classes are, but I have started walking through the arrt building. The original tiles in the art building are a different colour than the replacement tiles. EVIL...
by JET73L
Tue Jul 29, 2008 3:24 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

The jesters then begin their commentary on the brutal fight between two knights, one of which had impugned the honor of the other, and had been challenged to a fight to the death. No bonus points for me :( There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke up with a fright in...
by JET73L
Sun Jul 20, 2008 7:08 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Attach it to a giant slingshot. Hurl yourself from slingshot. Endure humiliation of others laughing at your gullibility.

What do you get when you cross an ostrich and a kickboxer?
by JET73L
Sun Jul 20, 2008 7:05 pm UTC
Forum: General
Topic: Making the world a weirder place
Replies: 1920
Views: 134377

Re: Making the world a weirder place

I saw what was potentially the best homeless guy on the planet yesterday. He was carrying a paper bag with "Beer and weed fund" written on it, asking people for donations. Homeless guy with a sign that says "Why bother lying? Please give me money that we both know I'll spend on liquo...
by JET73L
Sun Jul 20, 2008 6:59 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Really? THat's dd. I usually want to sing when I've got a song stuck in my head (although I usually just hum it, since i can;t often remember much of the song), or there's a song I like and know the lyrics to on the radio. What's the differenc ebetween a peanut butter & jelly sandwich and a pean...
by JET73L
Sun Jul 20, 2008 6:52 pm UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0245: "Floor Tiles"
Replies: 252
Views: 62947

Re: "Floor Tiles" Discussion

I hate, hate, hate when they have a sidewalk where the squares are betwen 2.5 and 5 inches of my natural stride (like the ones on my campus), becaus eI have to readjusty my stride every 2 or 3 steps, and I can;t just step over the crack half a step early. As for the coloured tiles... I've fortunatel...
by JET73L
Fri Jul 18, 2008 3:49 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Because the Ask The Person Below You A Question thread was busy.

THis is tha great joke, you have to finish it. Knock Knock!
by JET73L
Tue Jul 15, 2008 11:49 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

No. I know the locations of several towns and cities called San Jose, and a San Jose Mission, but I don;t know the way to any of them more specifically than southwest (or, in one case, due west)

What is Batman's favorite color?
by JET73L
Tue Jul 15, 2008 4:37 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Yes, but in all probability, I will only remember you foir a few tenths of a second, and that only because you asked.

So, a platypus walks into a bar...
by JET73L
Sat Jul 12, 2008 10:08 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

One is hardcore awesomeness, and the other is made of green felt and two halves of a ping-pong ball and wears a frock and collar and is still made of awesomeness.

What do you call a fly readign a newspaper?
by JET73L
Fri Jul 11, 2008 9:01 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

The boys are then sent to their room for asking what sort of food "filthy cheating b*****d" is.

Whay do you get when you cross a galaxy with a ball of yarn?
by JET73L
Fri Jul 11, 2008 8:53 pm UTC
Forum: General
Topic: Making the world a weirder place
Replies: 1920
Views: 134377

Re: Making the world a weirder place

For the message in a bottle, throw it off the side of a long pier into the surf, far enough from the shore and close enough toi the pier that people on the beach don;t see you, and close enough to the shore but far enough from the beach that it doesn't get stuck under the pier or floaty out to sea. ...
by JET73L
Thu Jul 10, 2008 1:08 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

The swan pecks the duck to death because swans are complete b******s. So are geese.

A man walks into a bar, and offers to sell the bartender a genie's lamp for $500...
by JET73L
Tue Jul 08, 2008 3:01 am UTC
Forum: General
Topic: This blows my mind!
Replies: 311
Views: 26404

Re: This blows my mind!

@M.qrius: Bah. In the lower picture, her left arm passes through her torso, whioch then becomes translucent and lets off a burst of viosible radiation at the edges of the arm, where it is most visibly dense. It is far less likely that her upper and lower body are moving in opposite directions. I lik...
by JET73L
Tue Jul 08, 2008 2:54 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

No, but if you calculate a few integers, I could sing it. A man is walking along the street one day when he finds a shaggy dog. THe dog has a collar, but no tag, so he takes him home and makes some FGound Dog fliers, with the dog's description. SAcouple of days later, he meets another man,. who had ...
by JET73L
Sat Jul 05, 2008 4:44 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

I said, "Really? THis is great! You;ve been trying to have a kid for months!" Then she replied, "No, I was just testing you, to see if you agreed with me in this." That was the last straw with her mind games, so I had her committed as a textbook case of sadisim/sociopathy. Once, ...
by JET73L
Fri Jul 04, 2008 4:38 pm UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0445: "I Am Not Good with Boomerangs"
Replies: 132
Views: 36887

Re: "I Am Not Good with Boomerangs" discussion

@ Theme park: I just realised, the last row of panels could be used as a Scientific vs. Normal comic, if it split and had a second fourth panel with a normal person just standing there.
by JET73L
Fri Jul 04, 2008 4:36 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

A random passerby stops to make a comment about the opld bazooka joe comic where he throws the clock out the window because he wanted to see... but gets hit by the clock, goes into a coma, and his family sues the inventor who was doing a presentation on the 30th floor of his new (and not always func...
by JET73L
Fri Jul 04, 2008 4:30 pm UTC
Forum: Science
Topic: How many ways can you empty a glass of water?
Replies: 129
Views: 10748

Re: How many ways can you empty a glass of water?

There are actually two ways to empty a glass of water: -remove the water -move the glass (although if you want to get technical about it, there is only ione way, by separating the water from the space inside the glass). Note: Not meant to start a fight or anything, i was on this thread seriously a c...
by JET73L
Fri Jul 04, 2008 4:24 pm UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0445: "I Am Not Good with Boomerangs"
Replies: 132
Views: 36887

Re: "I Am Not Good with Boomerangs" discussion

I actually thought it was because the shark was shaped like a boomerang, and that iot had nothing to do with the movie. But it does make ensewith the alt-text bonus strip. I love this comic. I have made two boomerangs, one traditional, and one cross-patterned (wiuth the four wings, rather than two)....
by JET73L
Wed Jul 02, 2008 3:05 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Who owned a mule. He used it to plow a filed of grain, as it was a small field, and he did not have the money for a horse or an ox. Eventually, the localk villiagers created an angry mob to and executed him under charges of bestiality, despite the fact that he had done nothing of the sort, as they h...
by JET73L
Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:23 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

A SonoSaurus (copyright and TM UltraRecord)

A man walks into a doctor's office, and complains of a tiny ringing in his ear...
by JET73L
Mon Jun 30, 2008 2:52 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

The physicist is depressed because his research grant was rescinded, the mathematician worked ath the same university and was there to help console him, and the juggler was there because he hated his job at the circus and wanted to get drunk then, so hed have the weekend to sober up before his next ...
by JET73L
Mon Jun 30, 2008 2:25 pm UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0442: "xkcd Loves the Discovery Channel"
Replies: 372
Views: 73169

Re: "xkcd Loves the Discovery Channel" discussion

I liked that commercial. I LOVE this comic. (I love that panel 3. I love this forum. and all xkcd. boom de yada boom de yada...)

Problem is, now I;ve got the blogosphere, cryptography, and her sister mixed up with tornadoes, egyptian kings, and lighting Jamie's arm on fire.
by JET73L
Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:20 pm UTC
Forum: Language/Linguistics
Topic: Spacky Woonerisms
Replies: 41
Views: 15259

Re: Spacky Woonerisms

I love spoonerisms. Except when I make them. Which is increasingly often.

The tory steller at RenFest was interesting. We ended up spending over an hour there one year.
by JET73L
Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:14 pm UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

The russian millionaire bet on the turtle, and won. They were not talking animals, but rather people in costumes, and the russian millionaire knew that the lion and the hare were really very out-of-shape people, and the turtle was a worl-class marathon runner with a lightweight, aerodynamically desi...
by JET73L
Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:03 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Dead. I hate spiders.

Why did Santa only have seven reindeer this year?
by JET73L
Mon Jun 23, 2008 9:57 am UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0440: "Road Rage"
Replies: 94
Views: 25509

Re: "Road Rage" Discussion

Guilt-truipping in that manner is mean, many would say too harsh a punishment for tailgating. As for the laptop on in the backseat, it could easily be done to someone without a laptop on, with volume up, with an application to test what channel the nearest active radio is recieving, then using a mod...
by JET73L
Sun Jun 22, 2008 7:10 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

One of the wheels hits a rock the wrong way and cracks apart. They end up at their destination late, after the time it took to replace the wheel.

What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck. What has four wheels and flies and time travels?
by JET73L
Sat Jun 21, 2008 6:08 am UTC
Forum: Language/Linguistics
Topic: Annoying words, and Words You Hate
Replies: 1931
Views: 363441

Re: Annoying words, and Words You Hate

Improper pluralizations: - persons - It's people. We learned this as children. Come on -People who pluralize all words that end in -us or -is like cacti is to cactus (for instance, peni for penis , as opposed to penises . improper pluralization in general tick me off. See Alumnuses. Alumni (siongul...
by JET73L
Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:55 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

... a complete waste of time. I mean, who would ever sponser an ice hockey league played with full cans of beer for a puck? It's shrapnel waiting to happen! A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says he can't bring that dog in the bar, and the man bets entry for the dog and $400 that the ...
by JET73L
Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:48 am UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0439: "Thinking Ahead"
Replies: 164
Views: 23460

Re: "Thinking Ahead" Discussion

"Look! Look where I'm pointing!" "What day is it? What month is it?" "He/She is a creature of extraordinary grace." "How did your brain learn human speech?" [quote=supermaket xkcd girl] This food is problematic...[/quote] Apparently, I;ve been quoting Firefly...
by JET73L
Thu Jun 19, 2008 7:40 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

A duck with an affliction unusual to waterfowl.

What's the difference between an Adam Sandler* movie and a blank DVD?

*change name to that of an actor or director you dislike, if you happen to like adam sandler movies. I dislike the more recent ones, and find previous ones often funny, though crude.
by JET73L
Wed Jun 18, 2008 6:07 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Or doesn;t/. How can yopu really tell? It's just an idea anyway, ideas typically can;t walk, and even if they could, IU doubt they would be capable or willing of walking into a bar. THey may be brought to a bar, though, or brought up in a bar. Especially those ideas such as the Klein Stein, or beer ...
by JET73L
Wed Jun 18, 2008 6:03 am UTC
Forum: Individual XKCD Comic Threads
Topic: 0438: "Internet Argument"
Replies: 117
Views: 27322

Re: Internet Argument Discussion

But somebody on ther internet is wrong! It doesn;t matter thet they're now standing in my living room! On a less jocular note, I actually find it easier to avoid fights in the ionternet than in real life. On the internet, you can assume that ewither a person is too stupid to listen to your side of t...
by JET73L
Tue Jun 17, 2008 6:32 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

Well, assuming you mean a loaf of bread, one is a delicious product of flour, water, yeast, probably milk and eggs (depending on the type of bread the loaf is made of) combined and allowed to cook in a heated environment, and an elephant is made of mammalian-type biomatter, generally uncooked, and o...
by JET73L
Mon Jun 16, 2008 4:56 am UTC
Forum: Forum Games
Topic: Ruin a Joke
Replies: 800
Views: 45501

Re: Ruin a Joke

The duck was in the pond at the zoo across the sidewalk from the lion;s cage, and the housekeeper (on her day off), was staniding on the sidewalk, enjoying the nice weather at the zoo that day.

How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?

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