xkcd

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Channel 4 just hired Stormy Daniels to be their new weatherperson. She edged out Jenny McCarthy for the position.

Be sure to check out the new "Big Blow" hurricane coverage.

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Some posters inadvertently irritate people by, for example, using "Sieg heil!" as a synonym for "Gesundheit!"

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Eventually there will be a big vertical drop then the line will continue horizontally.

The notation will be "Rosebud, broken snow globe, other assorted junk", in a different printing style than previous entries.

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"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things."

As good a course of action today as it was two thousand years ago.

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Some feel the best Turkish Delight is the Mauser brand.

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"Never release your tax return. Build a wall instead." - D. Trump

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Autogyros carried the mail in the 1930s.

http://postalmuseumblog.si.edu/2015/04/ ... -mail.html

It was developed by Juan de la Cierva. Cierva died in the crash of a KLM airliner in 1936. He was honored on Spanish stamps in 1939.

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Lights at ends of tunnels were observed by Presidents and generals in Vietnam 50 years ago.

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Imagine this comic as a Seinfeld episode.

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Randall, please fix the link in the comic. People's egos are at stake!

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Presidential elections are held in leap years to allow the maximum amount of time to decide who is the best candidate.

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Nothing about Mrs. Claus? Are they still together or did she leave him when she found out he brought Apollonia Kotero a sex shooter in 1984? Rumor is he said to her "Come on and kiss the gun".

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The felsius symbol is simply a kyphotic F.

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An additional feature - songs that play until the reply is sent. Time is on My Side. Rolling Stones How the Time Flies. Jerry Wallace Time. Chambers Brothers No Time. The Guess Who Out of Time. Rolling Stones As Time Goes By. Dooley Wilson What Time is It? The Jive Five Time After Time. Cyndi Pauper...

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I bet the SVR agent reading this thread has suffered terminal boredom.

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Thermostats containing mercury don't have these problems.

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Today's skywatchers are the descendants of people who took to heart the 1951 message "Keep watching the skies."

And don't forget the DEW Line.

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This is why we need more monks majoring in computer science.

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Unfortunately, bioinvaders mutate. Before my internal defense cells develop countermeasures, each sneeze produces an offensive mist that will overwhelm your killer cells. Like the mist that covered your pointer before the meeting, witch.

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Theme song from 59 years ago.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebkxzU2mATU

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The chemists are happy. They're celebrating Mole Day.

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Bronze rules!

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George Costanza pretended to a marine biologist and saved a whale from a golf ball.

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An increasing number of buns have been observed eating Cheetos. This was first reported by Don Cheetle.

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Change the name of our nation from United States of America (no disrespect intended, Amerigo Vespucci) to Unrivaled Sections of the Sensible Right (USSR). With some changes, the song Back in the USSR could be the new national anthem. For example, change "keep your little comrade warm" to &...

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"Ear Bud", a great film comedy.

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Theme music

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbSGMRZsN4Q

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=An2a1_Do_fc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uSLLd8eHy4

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Organic chemistry: A demonstration of mass extinction using premed students.

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Get Rush Limbaugh to sign it and you've got it made!

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Statues of Confederate figures were erected many years ago. Today most of the former Dixiecrats are now Republicans and I feel sure would be happy to see the following replacements. Jefferson Davis replaced by Abraham Lincoln or John C. Fremont. Fremont was the first Republican presidential candida...

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Active Ingredients Only for Seniors

Active Ingredients
Those in Active Ingredients Only
Sildenafil citrate

Instructions - Take with water. Swallow quickly.

Side effects - Not following instructions may make neck hard.*

*Thanks, Redd Foxx.

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Keep the citizens happy. The more differences they have, the more chances they will have to say the satisfying phrase "Told you, a--hole!"

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...and the horse Putin rode in on.

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Environmental Analytical Chemist

In lab coat in front of GC/MS - midpoint

In hazmat suit near body on ground - far right

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I believe Dr. D. Howser still uses MS-DOS.

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The next version will have the Shroud of Turin-style facial unlock replaced by Goats Head Soup-style facial unlock.

The (oxymoronic) burns clean coal feature will be dropped because of objections by Black Lungs Matter.

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Another example of trash talking.

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Meteor Storm. An astronomical event, not the 1950s stripper.

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Is the title of the crime drama "Slicing Bad"?

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Getting rid of California. BHG is working for POTUS or Rush Limbaugh.

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