Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

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Freddino18
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Freddino18 » Wed Aug 23, 2017 6:39 pm UTC

Kill your children.

I am morbid.
Cautiously pessimistic.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby somitomi » Thu Aug 24, 2017 12:01 am UTC

Rearrange the letters, so you become a dim orb
Okay, that was bleak but it's like 2 am...
I can't sleep
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Freddino18 » Thu Aug 24, 2017 5:53 pm UTC

Image

Connection is too damn slow
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ucim
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Fri Aug 25, 2017 12:09 am UTC

Upload from the public library's computers.

I can't see the image in the post above this one.

(Edit: wow! This thread works! I can see it now! Of course, now I don't have any petty problems... but that's a petty problem.)

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby somitomi » Thu Aug 31, 2017 9:55 am UTC

Hail Hypnotoad, that's all you need to know about it.

I need one washer for something, but it isn't economical to drive one town away for such a small and cheap item.
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they/them/theirs = he/him/his ❖ If you want to use something else out of dadaist spite, I won't mind.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Lavender Manna » Thu Aug 31, 2017 7:41 pm UTC

If you're willing to wait, order some on amazon. If not, cannibalize something less necessary that has a washer of the same size.

I just realized that "cannibalize" comes from "cannibalism" and now it feels weird.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Thu Aug 31, 2017 10:32 pm UTC

Get yourself the American Heritage Dictionary (the red one, not the blue one), which has a section in the back on proto-indo-european roots, and start tracing some words back to their proto-indo-european. Then trace those roots forward to come up with many bizzare connections between words. This will develop your interest in etymology, and it will no longer seem weird. You may end up with a shelf full of etymological dictionaries though.

I have to lower the pH and alkalinity in my pool quickly, and standard methods take too much time.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Lavender Manna » Fri Sep 01, 2017 12:50 am UTC

Here you go: https://www.google.com/search?q=common+household+acids This should be totally safe, right? Because it just turns to saltwater?

I don't know where my hardcopy etymological dictionary is, so I can't follow the previous advice

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby heuristically_alone » Fri Sep 01, 2017 5:50 am UTC

Google is any kind of dictionary you want it to be.

I don't want to be alone tonight but I am.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Freddino18 » Fri Sep 01, 2017 4:13 pm UTC

♪ Oh, won't you STAY with me
because you're ALL I need ♪

I got rejected by a member of the opposite sex. I already tried food.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Lavender Manna » Fri Sep 01, 2017 7:24 pm UTC

Try members of the same sex :razz: Or go after potential friends/partners based on criteria other than sex.

I can't decide whether or not to hit this bong

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby somitomi » Fri Sep 01, 2017 8:36 pm UTC

Toss a coin. You will know which side you're rooting for once the coin is airborne.

I may have made a small but fatal mistake while making a shelf for my HiFi stuff.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Tillian » Fri Sep 08, 2017 9:01 am UTC

Cover it with a second coat of lacquer and let it dry, until it ends up something like this:

Spoiler:
Image


Staying home with a cold doesn't feel as cozy as it did when I was a kid.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby somitomi » Fri Sep 08, 2017 12:39 pm UTC

Ask your mom to bring you comics and hot chocolate.

Tillian wrote:Cover it with a second coat of lacquer and let it dry, until it ends up something like this:

:mrgreen: Hahaha, well played...
But the fatal mistake lies in the placement of this cable port:
hifi_szekreny.jpg

It will probably interfere with the feet of my record player.
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they/them/theirs = he/him/his ❖ If you want to use something else out of dadaist spite, I won't mind.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Lavender Manna » Fri Sep 08, 2017 1:00 pm UTC

oh that's easy! just cut another three holes in the other corners so your record player nests comfortable into all four of them!

i want to do outdoorsy things today but the forecast says it will be cold and rainy

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby eran_rathan » Fri Sep 08, 2017 1:32 pm UTC

bring an umbrella and galoshes, and have someone waiting for you at home with hot chocolate and muffins!

on the other hand, it is a beautiful day here, and I have to work on the computer, but I want to be outside.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Lavender Manna » Fri Sep 08, 2017 1:36 pm UTC

Send someone out with an umbrella and galoshes, and prepare hot chocolate and muffins for when they come back! Then they can tell you about all the outdoor fun they had while you were working, and you can live vicariously through them

i cant stop YAWNIN' but i dont wanna be TIRED

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby eran_rathan » Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:47 pm UTC

Ingest caffiene, and then duct tape your mouth shut. You won't be tired and you won't be able to yawn.

I have to do work, but I'm spending time on FG.
"Trying to build a proper foundation for knowledge is blippery."
"Squirrels are crazy enough to be test pilots."
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby heuristically_alone » Fri Sep 08, 2017 3:44 pm UTC

Start a job streaming yourself on FG.

The engine in my car has a safety function that shuts off the engine and something keeps triggering it while I'm driving.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby somitomi » Fri Sep 08, 2017 4:22 pm UTC

You could tell it that disabling power steering and brake servo is the opposite of "safety". Or take the car to a mechanic, the engine shutting off at random sounds actually dangerous.

I'm concerned for Heury's safety now.
"It's like he's his own alt account. Saves all the logging in and out."/poxic
they/them/theirs = he/him/his ❖ If you want to use something else out of dadaist spite, I won't mind.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Mon Sep 25, 2017 6:26 pm UTC

Eat a mad cow and wait twenty years. You'll soon forget completely about heuristically_alone (and pretty much everything else).

I still can't hear well in my left ear.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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MisterH
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby MisterH » Tue Sep 26, 2017 9:38 am UTC

Arrange for your right ear to be transplanted to the left side of your head.

I am in a job where I feel unfulfilled and I have become demotivated.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Lavender Manna » Tue Sep 26, 2017 11:33 am UTC

start a class revolution

i have a cold sore and its really annoying :(

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Wed Sep 27, 2017 6:19 am UTC

Heat it up....with a blowtorch. It may still be annoying, but it won't be a cold sore anymore.

My cousin keeps flipflopping on whether or not she's coming on the trip.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Tillian » Thu Sep 28, 2017 7:31 pm UTC

Trade in your uncle/aunt for a new one. Then she won't be your cousin any more.

I want to stay up an hour later than is feasible on work nights.
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usually driving an ice cream truck.
NOTE: This is not me. That's another guy.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby somitomi » Thu Sep 28, 2017 8:27 pm UTC

Go to work one hour later and blame it on DST.

I can't cook and I can no longer rely on parents to do that for me.
"It's like he's his own alt account. Saves all the logging in and out."/poxic
they/them/theirs = he/him/his ❖ If you want to use something else out of dadaist spite, I won't mind.
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faubiguy
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby faubiguy » Thu Sep 28, 2017 11:07 pm UTC

Switch to a raw food only diet.

I forgot to take a photo I need at a one-time event.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby flicky1991 » Fri Sep 29, 2017 6:59 am UTC

Time travel.

I sometimes have too much to do at work, and sometimes have not enough.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Fri Sep 29, 2017 3:53 pm UTC

Time travel. (It's the universal fix).

I can't time travel except in the default direction and speed.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby chridd » Fri Sep 29, 2017 9:15 pm UTC

Time travel.

My right earbud has stopped working again.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby SirGabriel » Sat Sep 30, 2017 12:24 am UTC

You must be buying the wrong brand. Try getting $0.99 earbuds from China on ebay. That's what I do, and in my experience the right earbud always works long after the left one has broken.

I'm trying to find a new apartment, but so far all the ones I've found that received good reviews and fit my budget have at least a 6-month waiting list.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Sat Sep 30, 2017 1:47 am UTC

Lower your standards.

I can't figure out the tax laws that apply to me.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby eran_rathan » Sat Sep 30, 2017 2:45 am UTC

Just stop paying taxes, and eventually the IRS will tell you exactly how much you owe.

I always have more to do than there is time in the day.
"Trying to build a proper foundation for knowledge is blippery."
"Squirrels are crazy enough to be test pilots."
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby Tillian » Sat Sep 30, 2017 9:00 pm UTC

Turn your clock back each night and your days will be longer.

I desperately need social interaction, but my social interactees are nowhere to be found.
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heuristically_alone wrote:Tillian you are always in every single one of dreams,
usually driving an ice cream truck.
NOTE: This is not me. That's another guy.

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ucim
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Sun Oct 01, 2017 1:33 am UTC

Find new ones. Just walk up to people and say 'hello'; see where it goes from there. Each one is just a practice run for the next one; that should make it less terrifying.

My car's turning radius is too big.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Oct 15, 2017 10:52 pm UTC

buy a new car with a smaller turning radius.

go is too difficult but i want to play.
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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby chridd » Mon Oct 16, 2017 11:12 pm UTC

Play against someone who isn't good at it.

twitch.tv doesn't seem to be working on my phone.
~ chri d. d. /tʃɹɪ.di.di/ (Phonotactics, schmphonotactics) · they (for now, at least) · Forum game scores
mittfh wrote:I wish this post was very quotable...
flicky1991 wrote:In both cases the quote is "I'm being quoted too much!"

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby faubiguy » Tue Oct 17, 2017 5:12 am UTC

Open twitch.tv on a computer and then use a webcam to see video of the computer screen on your phone.

I want to eat a banana but the ones I have are not ripe yet.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby ucim » Sun Oct 29, 2017 4:59 am UTC

They are ripe by now. Eat them.

I keep tripping over the (torn) hem of my Halloween costume, but the party is over so it doesn't matter any more.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Solve the Previous Poster's Petty Problems

Postby eran_rathan » Tue Oct 31, 2017 12:28 pm UTC

take off your costume but put other clothes back on, please.

The power is out at home but I still have to work (because the office has power).
"Trying to build a proper foundation for knowledge is blippery."
"Squirrels are crazy enough to be test pilots."
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ


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