Vending machine!

For all your silly time-killing forum games.

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Kromix
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Kromix » Thu Mar 22, 2012 1:19 pm UTC

you get someone's mangled left arm


i put oatmeal into the vending machine
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Odilo
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Odilo » Thu Mar 22, 2012 6:17 pm UTC

You get goatmeal.

I put in my unfinished philosophy essay on dualism.
Odilo's List of Hatred:
1. Orangedragonfire - Cat-killer
2. Patzer - Traitor
3. Rupert Murdoch - cancelled Firefly

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Kromix
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Kromix » Thu Mar 22, 2012 6:19 pm UTC

you get an invitation to appear on univision.


i put it the goatmeal and badion's left testicle in the vending machine.
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darknut
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby darknut » Tue Apr 03, 2012 7:07 am UTC

it refuses to accept the goatmeal and testicle and shoots out my hand which slaps in the face along with a note that says "i think your fetish is weird as hell"

i run over and grab my hand, no time to put anything in the machine i gotta go get this re-attached
poxic wrote: Take a source of light and cook it up until it lases -- now you have a laser.

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LOLBeth
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby LOLBeth » Wed Apr 04, 2012 3:51 am UTC

I walk past the vending machine on the way to the Non Sequitur thread and get the conclusion to Odilo's philosophy essay on dualism.

I put in the punchline to a particularly lame joke.

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Badion
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Badion » Wed Apr 04, 2012 3:51 pm UTC

You dont get jack shizer because......

I use a HUGE MOTHER FUCKIN CROWBAR and smash the vending machine. I take all of the crap everyone has gotten and go to the next vending machine and put it all back in.
One of these things is not like the others.
Every penny saved costs the government 2.1cents.

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LOLBeth
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby LOLBeth » Wed Apr 04, 2012 10:42 pm UTC

You get a 16-ton safe that plummets from the ceiling and smashes you to jelly. It's labeled 'anti-crowbar defense mechanism'.

I put the crowbar and the bits of the smashed vending machine into the undamaged vending machine.

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bug sniper
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby bug sniper » Thu Apr 05, 2012 2:32 am UTC

You get a coupon for 10% off for a replacement vending machine.

I insert a coupon for a bottle of Dr. Pepper, to see if the machine will accept it.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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Odilo
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Odilo » Thu Apr 05, 2012 3:08 am UTC

You get Dr. Phil trapped in a bottle.

I put in xkcd.
Odilo's List of Hatred:
1. Orangedragonfire - Cat-killer
2. Patzer - Traitor
3. Rupert Murdoch - cancelled Firefly

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Vohu Manah
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Vohu Manah » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:19 pm UTC

You get a string of random letters and a top hat.

I put in Turkey.
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bug sniper
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby bug sniper » Sat Apr 07, 2012 9:22 pm UTC

You get Hungary and the feeling that you shouldn't have eaten your dinner rather than inserting Turkey.

I put in the Leaning Tower of Pizza.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

Metazoan
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Joined: Fri Mar 16, 2012 2:21 pm UTC

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Metazoan » Sun Apr 08, 2012 7:10 pm UTC

You get a large bill from a carpet cleaning company.

I put in an IOU for a bottle of brandy, a box of matches and a spoon.

I suspect I don't want to be holding that lot when the IOU comes due.

Maybe I should have been a banker.

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bug sniper
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby bug sniper » Mon Apr 09, 2012 5:29 pm UTC

You get a list of the possible random items you might receive in return, including a towel, a box of cereal, and a flashlight.

I insert a bus token.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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Badion
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Location: In the lollipop forest!

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Badion » Mon Apr 09, 2012 5:35 pm UTC

you get a a completely useless metric wrench which makes it completely useless.

I put in a picture of a sunset.
One of these things is not like the others.
Every penny saved costs the government 2.1cents.

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Metazoan
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Metazoan » Mon Apr 09, 2012 7:24 pm UTC

You get a green flash.

I feed in some electricity from my new atomic pile.

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LOLBeth
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby LOLBeth » Mon Apr 09, 2012 10:28 pm UTC

You get a pile of atoms. They're blue.

I put my left foot in. I take my left foot out. I put my left foot in and shake it all about.

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Badion
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Badion » Tue Apr 10, 2012 5:30 pm UTC

You get a bloody stump. Stop playing with the vending machine.

I put in blood remover. Its a real thing.
One of these things is not like the others.
Every penny saved costs the government 2.1cents.

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Snark
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Snark » Tue Apr 10, 2012 5:53 pm UTC

You get a unicorn horn. It's a real thing.

I put in a slice of cold pizza.
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LOLBeth
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby LOLBeth » Tue Apr 10, 2012 9:49 pm UTC

You get the square root of -1. It's an unreal thing.

I put in my two cents' worth.

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Thesh
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Thesh » Wed Apr 11, 2012 3:59 am UTC

You get ignored.

I put in a used prostitute.
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

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Arlick
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Arlick » Wed Apr 11, 2012 11:06 am UTC

You get a used nun

I put in three legs of chair and a turnip
I have some questions, and by that I mean one. Is anyone else afraid of toasters?
Go easy on my spelling, I am slightly dyslexic.

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madjo
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby madjo » Wed Apr 11, 2012 11:20 am UTC

You get hit over the head with the rest of the chair, and the green sprouts of a carrot.

I put in my entry to this year's Eurovision song contest.
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

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Badion
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Location: In the lollipop forest!

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Badion » Wed Apr 11, 2012 2:36 pm UTC

You get nothing if we can't see it. Or hear the recording.

Removing the entry and holding it until further notice. I place my shoe laces into the vending machine. There are no aglets.
One of these things is not like the others.
Every penny saved costs the government 2.1cents.

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matt96
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Location: A suburb of Boston

Re: Vending machine!

Postby matt96 » Fri Apr 13, 2012 5:01 am UTC

You get various pamphlets on the importance of aglets, how to protect your aglets from falling apart, and how to perform maintenance on aglets that are starting to fall apart.

I put in my old, empty wallet that is starting to fall apart.

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Arlick
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Arlick » Fri Apr 13, 2012 6:34 am UTC

You get an I.O.U

I put in a kilogram of orange cat hair
I have some questions, and by that I mean one. Is anyone else afraid of toasters?
Go easy on my spelling, I am slightly dyslexic.

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bug sniper
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby bug sniper » Fri Apr 13, 2012 4:26 pm UTC

You get sneezing from inside the machine.

I insert a nonexchangable train ticket.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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Badion
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Location: In the lollipop forest!

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Badion » Mon Apr 16, 2012 6:05 pm UTC

You get a plane ticket for a flight that was yesterday.

I put in a pedometer.
One of these things is not like the others.
Every penny saved costs the government 2.1cents.

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matt96
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby matt96 » Mon Apr 16, 2012 6:24 pm UTC

You get a business card for some person claiming to be a "foot guru"

I put in a ball of metal that I pocketed in the thread titled "take a penny leave a penny."

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Odilo
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Odilo » Mon Apr 16, 2012 8:37 pm UTC

You get a penny that's about to self-destruct.

I put in my chainmail shirt.
Odilo's List of Hatred:
1. Orangedragonfire - Cat-killer
2. Patzer - Traitor
3. Rupert Murdoch - cancelled Firefly

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Snark
Posts: 425
Joined: Mon Feb 27, 2012 3:22 pm UTC

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Snark » Mon Apr 16, 2012 8:42 pm UTC

You get out a chain-mithril shirt.

I put in 600 copies of J.R.R. Tolkien's Lord of the Rings.
Dashboard Confessional wrote:I want to give you whatever you need. What is it you need? Is it within me?


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matt96
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby matt96 » Tue Apr 17, 2012 2:59 am UTC

You get one copy of the movie trilogy The Lord of the Rings


I put in $1.25

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Odilo
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Odilo » Tue Apr 17, 2012 4:11 am UTC

The vending machine eats your money.

I put in world peace.
Odilo's List of Hatred:
1. Orangedragonfire - Cat-killer
2. Patzer - Traitor
3. Rupert Murdoch - cancelled Firefly

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Arlick
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Location: Seven.

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Arlick » Tue Apr 17, 2012 8:26 am UTC

You get the world in pieces

I put in the letter 'D'
I have some questions, and by that I mean one. Is anyone else afraid of toasters?
Go easy on my spelling, I am slightly dyslexic.

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Badion
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Location: In the lollipop forest!

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Badion » Tue Apr 17, 2012 12:43 pm UTC

you get a bag.

I put in a towel.
One of these things is not like the others.
Every penny saved costs the government 2.1cents.

Image

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Kyreles
Posts: 9
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Kyreles » Tue Apr 17, 2012 3:30 pm UTC

You get water. It sprays everywhere.

I put in a live penguin.
In compliance with rule §05.02 this signature may be construed as a promotion of Nomic 16.0

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Snark
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Snark » Tue Apr 17, 2012 3:31 pm UTC

You get a tuxedo that's two sizes too small for you.

I put in my Christmas letter to Santa.
Dashboard Confessional wrote:I want to give you whatever you need. What is it you need? Is it within me?


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Kyreles
Posts: 9
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Re: Vending machine!

Postby Kyreles » Tue Apr 17, 2012 3:33 pm UTC

A very disoriented elf pops out and runs off.

I put in Nomic 16.0
In compliance with rule §05.02 this signature may be construed as a promotion of Nomic 16.0

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matt96
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Location: A suburb of Boston

Re: Vending machine!

Postby matt96 » Tue Apr 17, 2012 11:03 pm UTC

you lose Nomic 16.0 and Orangedragonfire is able to easily win Nomic 16.0

I put in 3 hours of my time.

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Badion
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Location: In the lollipop forest!

Re: Vending machine!

Postby Badion » Wed Apr 18, 2012 7:45 pm UTC

You get nothing back. What a waste.

I put in a leopard
One of these things is not like the others.
Every penny saved costs the government 2.1cents.

Image

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RaceBandit
Posts: 7
Joined: Wed Feb 29, 2012 11:31 pm UTC

Re: Vending machine!

Postby RaceBandit » Thu Apr 19, 2012 1:20 am UTC

You get a keyboard and the sneaking suspicion that something around here is backwards.

I insert an Ultra Ball containing a Raikou.


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