Create a Card: MTG

[firechicago]

Angel of the Wood
4WG
Creature - Angel
Flying
When Angel of the Wood enters the battlefield and when it attacks, untap one forest and one plains you control.
3/3

Next Card: Cake or Death

[Elvish Pillager]

Cake or Death
GB
Instant
Target creature's controller sacrifices it unless that player has you add GGBB to your mana pool.

Next card: Angel of Cake

[Kain]

Angel of Cake
2BR
Creature - Demon
When ~ enters the battlefield under its owner's control, chose target opponent. That player gains control of ~, and loses 5 life.
Whenever ~ is dealt combat damage, its controller loses that much life.
5/5
The cake isn't the only lie.

Next Card: Betrayers Betrayed

[Gypped]

Betrayers Betrayed
2BB
Instant - Trap

If target opponent sacrificed a creature this turn, you may play ~ for B instead.
Return X+1 creatures from target opponent's graveyard to the battlefield under your control, where X is the number of creatures sacrificed by target opponent this turn. The creatures come into play with haste. Sacrifice the creatures at the beginning of your next end step.

Next Card: DENIED -or- Top Secret -or- Befuddled Wizard -or- Not Your Average Lazy Goblin

[eculc]

DENIED
2
instant
Counter target spell. if target opponent plays another spell this turn, return ~ to your hand.

Next: The Reagan Hammer

[KrazyerKate]

The Reagan Hammer 4
Artifact - Equipment
Equipped creature gets +3/+0. If equipped creature is a Republican, all of its activated abilities create an extra 2 votes.
Equip 5

Next Card: [an american politician]

[Gypped]

[an american politician]
BBBBBBBB
Creature - Demon
0/1

~ cannot attack or block.

They're all the same - useless and expensive.

Next Card: Internet -or- Gurren Lagann -or- Spiral King, Lordgenome -or- Kamina, Fearless Leader of Team Dai-Gurren -or- Chaotic Perturbation -or- Strange Attractor

Edit: I guess no one here watched Gurren Lagann. Added more choices

[Pjotr]

Strange Attractor
6RRR
Creature - Weird
Rampage 2
Strange Attractor can't attack unless all other creatures you control are tapped.
Whenever Strange Attractor attacks, all creatures defending player controls that are able to block it must do so.
5/5

Next: Infinite Wishes

[Kain]

Infinite Wishes
XXXXX
Sorcery
Spend only colorless mana to pay Infinite Wishes' mana cost.
You may choose X colorless cards you own from outside the game >or from your exile zone<, reveal those cards, and put them into your hand. Exile Infinite Wishes.

(Note that the stuff between the > < would probably break the card, but it makes it fit better with the name. If the card had been named Infinite Wish, I would not have included it).

Next Card: Runeclad Djinn

[Gypped]

Runeclad Djinn
1UU
Creature - Djinn
2/2

At the beginning of your upkeep, target creature gains shroud until your next upkeep.

Next Card: Revival Thread -or- Stern Concentration -or- Mystic Calculator

[Kain]

Revival Thread
G
Enchantment - Aura
Enchant Equipment
Enchanted Equipment has "G: The next time equipped creature would be destroyed this turn, regenerate it."

(I thought I was being clever with the enchant equipment thing, but they already used that once)

Next card: Sum of the Roots

[firechicago]

Next card: Sum of the Roots

Sum of the Roots
2GG
Creature-Elemental
*/*
When Sum of the Roots enters play, place a root counter on two lands without a root counter controlled by an opponent.
When a land with a root counter is tapped, you may place a root counter on target land without a root counter controlled by an opponent.
Sum of the Roots' power and toughness are equal to the number of root counters in play

Next Card: Flexible Response

[eculc]

Flexible Response
X
Instant
Counter target spell. gain life equal to (x) minus target spell's converted mana cost.

Next card: prestidigitation

[Pjotr]

Prestidigitation
UUU
Tribal Instant - Wizard
Target a spell. When it resolves, its owner draws a card.
"Presto!"

Next:
Kith and Kin

[Kain]

Kith and Kin
5
Enchantment - Aura [can an aura also be tribal, and can a tribal enchantment not have a creature type until it enters play?]
Enchant Land
Kith and Kin may only enchant a land you control. When Kith and Kin enters the battlefield, chose a creature type. Mana produced by enchanted land may only be used to pay for the mana costs of spells with that creature type.
As long as enchanted land is untapped, you have absorb x, where x is the number of permanents you control with the chosen creature type.

[I should point out that I am using the term in its original meaning]
[I almost wanted to make this an artifact - fortification to represent how people migrate (low casting cost but high fortification cost to represent the ... issues... with relocating one's homeland), but figured that would be highly broken...]

Oh, that Flexible Response should probably either have a clause that it can only counter spells with cmc less than x, or alternatively that if X is less than the cmc of the countered spell, you lose cmc - x life (to keep it from being a 0 cmc instant counter).

Next Card: Retconning

[Pjotr]

[can an aura also be tribal, and can a tribal enchantment not have a creature type until it enters play?]

Yep, I think you'd want to word it something like this:

"Tribal Enchantment - Shapeshifter Aura

When ~ enters the battlefield, choose a creature type. ~ becomes a tribal enchantment with that subtype (It's no longer a shapeshifter.)"

Soo... new card?

[Kain]

Um, next card is "Retconning" obviously

[firechicago]

Retconning
3UU
Instant
Choose one:
Destroy all creatures played this turn
-or-
Return all non-token creatures destroyed this turn to the battlefield under their owner's control.

Next Card: Incompetent Assistant

[Kain]

Incompetent Assistant
1 U/R
Creature - Goblin
When ~ enters the battlefield, you may untap an island or a mountain.
At the beginning of your upkeep, pay U/R. If you cannot, exile a card from your hand.
1/1
(Izzet Watermark)

Next card: Bumbling Squire

[Gypped]

Bumbling Squire
1W
Creature - Human Soldier
2/2

When ~ enters the battlefield, you must either tap a Knight creature or pay 1.
Exalted

Next Card: Clumsy Myr

[Elvish Pillager]

Clumsy Myr
2
Artifact Creature - Myr
3/3
If Clumsy Myr would deal combat damage, any opponent may have you add that much colorless mana to your mana pool instead.

Next card: Devastated Jumble

[Kain]

Devastated Jumble
2
Artifact
Whenever Devastated Jumble becomes tapped, flip a coin. If you win the flip, put a chaos counter on target permanent. If you lose the flip, target opponent places a disorder counter on target permanent of their choice.
Permanents with disorder counters do not untap during their controller's untap steps.
T: Lose 1 life.

Next Card: Solemn Soliloquy

[eculc]

solemn soliloquy
X
instant
add 2X to your mana pool. all mana added to your mana pool by this spell must be a single color of your choosing.

Next: Necrotic horror

[firechicago]

Necrotic Horror
Creature - Zombie
2BB
2/2
Whenever Necrotic Horror deals combat damage to a creature, place a -1/-1 counter on that creature.
During your upkeep, place a -1/-1 counter on any creature which already has a -1/-1 counter.

Next Card: Apres Moi, Le Deluge - or - Enormous Pompadour

[Kain]

Enormous Pompadour
2
Artifact - Equipment
Equip 4
Equipped Creature has "When this creature attacks, it must be blocked if able."
Equipped Creature has "8, Sacrifice Enormous Pompadour: All creatures able to block this creature this turn must do so."

Next Card:

Deluge of Familiars

[firechicago]

Next Card:

Deluge of Familiars

Deluge of Familiars 3UU
Instant

Put a 1/1 flying blue familiar token into play for every wizard in play.

Next Card: Misplaced Aggression

[sam_i_am]

Power : 3BBB : artifact

Tap: add GRBUW to your mana pool

Sacrifice Power: add 3 mana of any color to your mana pool.

When Power comes into play, shuffle your hand and graveyard into your library, draw 7 cards, then draw an additional 3 cards. You may take an additional turn after this one.

[eculc]

...

you didn't do the previous card.

Misplaced Aggression
4
Instant

Choose a single source of damage. all damage dealt by that source this turn is directed at a target of your choice.

Next Card: 360 Noscope Headshot

[BurningLed]

360 Noscope Headshot
RR
Instant

Counter target spell you control. Deal X damage to target creature or player, where X is the converted mana cost of the countered spell.

What's strategy?

Next: Gnomish Pyro-Necro-Geomancy-Mecha-Artific-Tinkerer

[firechicago]

Next: Gnomish Pyro-Necro-Geomancy-Mecha-Artific-Tinkerer

Gnomish Pyro-Necro-Geomancy-Mecha-Artific-Tinkerer
1UR
Summon Gnome
1/2

Sacrifice an artifact: roll a 6 sided die
If the die comes up 1, deal damage equal to the artifact's converted mana cost to target creature or player.
If the die comes up 2, return target creature from your graveyard to play.
If the die comes up 3, search your library for a basic land and put it in to play tapped.
If the die comes up 4, you may play an artifact card from your hand without paying its mana cost,
If the die comes up 5, you may search your library for an artifact card and place it into your hand.
If the die comes up 6, choose one of the above actions.

Artificing's like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get. -Rufus Roquat, Rex Gnomii

Next Card: Moving the Goalposts

[Gypped]

Moving the Goalposts
5
Enchantment

While ~ is in play, the life total needed to eliminate a player must be met exactly. (Life totals can go negative)
XX: Increase or decrease the life total needed to eliminate a player by X. Any player may play this ability.

Next Card: Senseless Bickering -or- Pit of Despair -or- Crafty Cohort

[Kain]

Senseless Bickering
1BB
Sorcery
Target creature fights a different target creature. If those creatures are controlled by the same player, their controller loses 1 life and you lose 4 life.

Next card: Haemogoblin

[phlip]

Haemogoblin
2R
Creature - Goblin 2/1

Haemogoblin comes into play with 3 Oxygen counters on it.
During your upkeep, remove an Oxygen counter from Haemogoblin.
1, T: Put two Oxygen counters on Haemogoblin.
Remove an Oxygen counter from Haemogoblin: Target creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn.
Whenever Haemogoblin has no Oxygen counters on it, sacrifice it.

Next card: Redshift // Blueshift

[Kain]

Redshift // Blueshift

Redshift
UU
Instant
If target creature could attack a player other than you this turn, it must do so.

Blueshift
RR
Intant
If target creature could attack you this turn, it must do so.

Next Card: Fancy Felt Fedora

[BurningLed]

Fancy Felt Fedora
2
Artifact - Equipment

Equipped creature gains "T: Prevent all damage which would be dealt to this creature this turn"

Equip 2

Next: Myr Abomination

[dudiobugtron]

Myr Abomination
2B
Artifact Creature - Zombie Myr
2/1

1, Sacrifice ~: Return target creature named "Myr Abomination" from your graveyard to the battlefield, under your control.
B, Sacrifice ~: Put a token that is a copy of ~ in to play under your control.
U, Sacrifice ~: At the beginning of the next upkeep, put a copy of ~ in to play under your control

"That thing just won't die!"


----Next card: Hidden Spiders

[BurningLed]

(That would be the most hilarious card against control decks.)

Hidden Spiders
{B/G}{B/G}
Creature - Spider
3/1

Morph GG

When ~ is turned face up, you may pay X mana. Use only black mana to pay for X. If you do, destroy all creatures with flying with converted mana cost X or less.

T: Deal damage equal to ~'s power to target attacking creature with flying.

Next: Sixteenth Place Ribbon

[Gypped]

Sixteenth Place Ribbon
1
Artifact - Equipment

T: Round robin through all players' graveyards starting with your own and count the creatures. Whoever counts the sixteenth creature must put it into play with this equipment attached.
Owner of equipped creature loses 2 life at the beginning of his or her upkeep.

So ashamed it hurts

Next Card: Stare Into Oblivion -or- Rapture

[dudiobugtron]

I like how the creature has to wear it as a badge of shame as well.


Stare Into Oblivion
5UUWW
Sorcery

Discard your hand. Exile all permanents you control. Exile all cards from your graveyard and library. Your life total becomes 1.
Choose an opponent. At the end of that opponent's next end step, they lose the game.

This is one staring contest you can't afford to lose.

Edit: I wanted to use something like this:
"Discard your possessions. Forget your knowledge. Ignore your battles. Renounce your existence. Stare into Oblivion."
But I wasn't sure who it should be a quote from. Any ideas?

-----------
Next card: Avalanche Titan -or- Mudslide Golem

[Gypped]

I like the flavor. It doesn't have to be a quote.

Avalanche Titan
3R
Creature - Giant
*/2

Trample
Avalanche Titan's power is equal to the number of tapped mountains you control.

Next Card: Mudslide Golem -or- Rapture