Corrupt-a-wish

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Freddino18
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Freddino18 » Sat Jun 30, 2018 6:56 am UTC

Granted. But whenever you use it, people snicker at you, muttering about what a TARD you IS.

I wish potato.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sat Jun 30, 2018 3:48 pm UTC

You get potahto.

I wish for a good breakfast.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Sun Jul 01, 2018 6:43 am UTC

Granted. You get a saint's terrible-tasting breakfast.

I wish I knew which sword to wield.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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eran_rathan
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Thu Jul 05, 2018 2:27 pm UTC

granted. given you're going to be going against a battleship, its not terribly useful.

I wish for a fully functional, fueled, and armed P-51D Mustang, along with a runway & carte blanche for strafing & bombing runs on multinational corporate headquarters.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Tue Aug 14, 2018 7:26 am UTC

Granted, but your runway is on a carrier that is my next adversary after I jetski towards this battleship and carve a hole into its steel hull with my monofilement blade I now know to choose and wield.

I wish to see eran surrender now that he's got nowhere to land.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby emlightened » Thu Aug 16, 2018 7:28 pm UTC

Granted, he takes his hands off the fighter jet he was in, and the autopilot navigates directly into you before crashing into you, hence making him victorious.

I wish I caught footage of the above two wishes.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Fri Aug 17, 2018 9:19 pm UTC

Granted. You were on the deck of the battleship. However, the footage evaporated along with you in the resulting inferno.

I wish for Cabernet Franc.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Aug 28, 2018 12:10 am UTC

granted. you also get some saltine crackers

i wish for an easy well paying job
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Tue Aug 28, 2018 1:29 am UTC

phillip1882 wrote:granted. you also get some saltine crackers
Cool!

phillip1882 wrote:i wish for an easy well paying job
Granted. You are offered a hundred thousand dollars to drive a Cadlllac from the Bronx to Miami. The only rule is, no matter what, you cannot open the trunk.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby flicky1991 » Tue Aug 28, 2018 2:56 pm UTC

Granted. You are Jose, I guess,

I wish people remembered the rules.
any pronouns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Aug 28, 2018 3:39 pm UTC

granted. the rules are survive by any means necessary

i wish for every dollar you donate, you receive 7*the value
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Tue Aug 28, 2018 8:07 pm UTC

Granted, you receive seven times the value of a penny.

I wish that Ucim was not Jose.
Last edited by Quizatzhaderac on Thu Sep 06, 2018 9:07 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Aug 28, 2018 9:26 pm UTC

granted but only if he/she agrees

i wish for love
good luck have fun

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Wed Sep 05, 2018 3:43 pm UTC

Granted. Someone loves you and you love someone else.

I wish there were e-sports in the olympics.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Wed Sep 05, 2018 5:54 pm UTC

Granted, the games played are ET, Dessert Bus, Zelda: faces of evil, and Kabuki Warriors. These replace 100 meter dash, floor gymnatics, curling, and (the planned addition of) pistol dueling.

I wish that somebody would make a Mario Brothers: the movie: the game, and that I would be free to play it or not.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Wed Sep 05, 2018 6:31 pm UTC

granted. it will be out in five years.

i wish french fries were more healthy for you.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Thu Sep 06, 2018 6:59 pm UTC

Granted. French Fries are very healthful for me. They are however deadly to you.

I wish I weren't so tired.

Other comments: Dessert Bus sounds like an awefulsome Olympic sport, and while ucim is indeed Jose, I'm not sure who "The Ucim" is. Unless I've stepped up a bit in social rank (or social rankness). :)

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Fri Sep 07, 2018 1:59 am UTC

granted. you can go a whole year without sleep or any negative consequences no sleep normally has.

i wish people would join my chess and go club that i'm starting soon.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby NathanBros » Mon Sep 10, 2018 2:55 am UTC

Granted, but people join and soon go... haha, got it?! :?

I wish chess wasn't so boring.

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Mon Sep 10, 2018 6:22 am UTC

Granted. Whenever a chesspiece is captured, a friend of the player is in real life captured and put on the rack. When the King is in check, the player for that color sits on hot coals until xe makes a move. When checkmate occurs, the losing player is boiled alive.

I wish I could create time out of thin air.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Mon Sep 10, 2018 4:16 pm UTC

Granted, you suffocate.

I wish for a Hyperloop system connecting all major American cities.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Sep 10, 2018 6:44 pm UTC

granted. it will take over 100 years to build.

i wish for a large lump sum of money to be deposited into my bank account
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Mon Sep 10, 2018 11:19 pm UTC

Granted. It takes a hundred years to clear.

I wish for a 182-RG.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Tue Sep 11, 2018 2:17 am UTC

Granted but it's disassembled and it will take you 100 years to assemble it on your own.

I wish I could time travel 100 years into the future.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Tue Sep 11, 2018 7:00 am UTC

Granted. It takes one hundred years.

I wish I could figure out this crossword puzzle.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Sep 11, 2018 12:54 pm UTC

granted, there are plenty more left to solve


i wish for happiness
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Tue Sep 11, 2018 2:04 pm UTC

Granted, in one hundred years you will be happy, then die one hundred seconds later form oldageitis.

I wish that we beat this "hundred years" response to death.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Sep 11, 2018 7:17 pm UTC

granted it takes 50 years.


i wish gravity was well understood why it doesn't require infinite energy.
good luck have fun

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eran_rathan
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Thu Sep 13, 2018 5:34 pm UTC

granted, you just need more mass.

I wish I had Pokeball technology.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Thu Sep 13, 2018 7:24 pm UTC

standard plastic "pokeballs" are created, but you cant catch anything with them

i wish cars were all self driving
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Fri Sep 14, 2018 5:11 am UTC

Granted. They only drive you where they decide you are permitted to go.

I wish for an unused US postage stamp with sufficient face value to send a first-class letter.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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eran_rathan
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Fri Sep 14, 2018 5:10 pm UTC

granted, but it had the proper face value for 1982, which is no longer sufficient.

I wish my house was on fire, and no one (animals included) was inside.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
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Quizatzhaderac
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Fri Sep 14, 2018 7:37 pm UTC

Granted, but there is a clause in your insurance contract the means you don't get any money if the fire is the result of a wish in a forum game. You are, however, liable for damage to your neighbors' properties and you still have to pay your mortgage off.

I wish my neighbors and I would get along (only metaphorically) like a house on fire.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Fri Sep 14, 2018 7:51 pm UTC

granted. it takes some up keep though.

i wish for no violence.
good luck have fun

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marionic
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby marionic » Sat Sep 15, 2018 9:21 pm UTC

Granted, you get no more violence than you were already going to receive.

I wish for a nice hat.
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phillip1882
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sat Sep 15, 2018 10:05 pm UTC

you get a fedora.

i wish for a good future.
good luck have fun

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marionic
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby marionic » Sat Sep 15, 2018 11:16 pm UTC

Granted. Time is rewritten from the start, making a better future. However, the conditions necessary for this particular future that was chosen out of an unlimited number of possible futures, predictably does not contain the evolution of man, and thus you are not around to enjoy said future.

I wish for spaghetti.
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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sun Sep 16, 2018 1:12 am UTC

Granted. You are a BASIC programmer. Old school.

I wish Mary would respond to the email I sent.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Please help addams if you can. She needs all of us.

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marionic
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby marionic » Sun Sep 16, 2018 8:20 am UTC

Granted. She responded by rolling her eyes and deleting the email.

I wish for :mrgreen:
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Sep 16, 2018 6:31 pm UTC

granted there are many smilies choose from

i wish a viable alternative to oil for cars is found
good luck have fun


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