xkcd

by **ArchangelShrike** » Fri May 18, 2007 7:41 pm UTC

Granted, It's now 10" tall.

I wish I had a PATA cable.

by **Spaz Funbag** » Fri May 18, 2007 7:44 pm UTC

Granted, but it still lies next to me.

I wish I didn't have finals next week.

by **Rodan** » Fri May 18, 2007 7:46 pm UTC

granted. They now start in three minutes. Get ready!

I wish I got "A"s in all my classes...

by **ArchangelShrike** » Fri May 18, 2007 7:55 pm UTC

Granted: Now when your teachers look at your papers that have no idea what all the "A"s mean, and fail you.

I wish your mom lasted longer.

[It was coming, you knew it!]

by **DonChubby** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:01 pm UTC

Granted, she now survives for another 200 years, and the rotting process is already starting.

I wish my hard-drive had 10 terabytes of storage.

by **Spaz Funbag** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:03 pm UTC

Granted, but it just head-crashed, so you lost about 3k $.

Iw ish there would be an HD-projector next to me.

Click link. Receive my face. · by **bbctol** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:03 pm UTC

Sure, but they're made out of tinkertoys, so it'll fill up your house.

I wish Bruce Schneier was my personal slave.

by **ArchangelShrike** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:06 pm UTC

Granted, she reenacts the Pink Panther as Kato(?) and roundhouse kicks you out the window.

I wish I had comic genius.

by **ZeroSum** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:08 pm UTC

Granted. Unfortunately your comic genius is beyond the humor comprehension of anyone on Earth and thus no one finds you funny.

I wish my hair weren't so messy.

by **Spaz Funbag** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:12 pm UTC

Granted. You go bald.

^obvious, man!

I wish for another HD-projector

by **ZeroSum** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:16 pm UTC

Granted, but it's stuck showing

.

(I know it was obvious, but I really wish my hair weren't such a mess.)

I wish I were a kitten.

by **DonChubby** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:18 pm UTC

Granted, you are eaten by a dog.

I wish i didn't have to go to the toilet within the next 10 minutes.

by **Phenriz** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:18 pm UTC

Granted, Hello colostomy bag!

I wish i were a komodo dragon.

by **Rodan** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:24 pm UTC

granted, but komodo dragons are passe, and you are lame.

I wish I had a wallaby to call "friend"

by **ZeroSum** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:28 pm UTC

Granted. Unfortunately, you may call your wallaby friend, but he is anything but. He is vicious and rabid.

I wish for a Star Trek (TNG) style replicator.

by **Tractor** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:30 pm UTC

Granted, but it only replicates sour milk.

I wish I had something interesting to do tonite.

Click link. Receive my face. · by **bbctol** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:32 pm UTC

Granted; running for your life is VERY interesting.

I wish the mods wouldn't corrupt my posts (ahem).

by **ArchangelShrike** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:32 pm UTC

Granted, you find a number of toilets that need you with a plunger.

I wish I had a physical copy of the interwebs.

by **Drake Zure** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:32 pm UTC

granted. you get to come muck out the stall at my barn!
there's an art to it...

i wish horses didn't crap so much.

by **Phenriz** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:33 pm UTC

Granted, but it will lead to the death of all modern civilizations as we know them.

I wish i had white hair.

by **ZeroSum** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:34 pm UTC

Granted. You have died at the age of 83 with a full head of white hair.

I wish I owned a firearm.

by **Phenriz** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:37 pm UTC

Granted, your arm is now set in a perpetual blaze, good luck dressing up to get fancy.

I wish canker sores were stricken from the planet, for all beings. (damn acidic imbalances)

by **ZeroSum** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:41 pm UTC

Granted. Everyone with a canker sore now ceases to exis

by **WhiteRabbit** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:43 pm UTC

I wish I had a wish to corrupt.

by **saxmaniac1987** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:48 pm UTC

Not Granted. (Which is totally in the rules).

I wish concert tickets weren't so expensive

by **ArchangelShrike** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:51 pm UTC

Granted. Now you can go to the CHEETAH GIRLS!!!

I wish for a fish in a dish.

Click link. Receive my face. · by **bbctol** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:55 pm UTC

Granted. It's ten years old.

I wish for ten million US$.

by **saxmaniac1987** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:58 pm UTC

Granted. A computer virus has been planted that repeats "US$" 10,000,000 times.

I wish I had gone to my sociology class more than i actually did

by **WhiteRabbit** » Fri May 18, 2007 8:58 pm UTC

Granted. Several tons of pennies are to be poured on you by a front end loader.

I wish my report was done.

by **SpitValve** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:02 pm UTC

Granted. Your report is tender and well-done as requested.

I wish I knew where Phenriz's cute avatar came from.

by **Phenriz** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:05 pm UTC

SpitValve wrote:I wish I knew where Phenriz's cute avatar came from.

Granted, Invader Zim, but unfortunately they aren't making new episodes anymore (i don't think)

I wish they'd make more episodes of Invader Zim.

Click link. Receive my face. · by **bbctol** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:06 pm UTC

Granted. They all suck, and you ruined a great show.

I wish I was smart(er).

by **Rodan** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:15 pm UTC

granted. Unfourtunately, now the inane and mindless drivel of other humans has annoyed you so much that you kill yourself.

I wish, I wish, I wish I had a spine...

by **Phenriz** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:22 pm UTC

Granted, It's made out of glass and lubricated with sandpaper.

I wish i were a werewolf.

by **Rodan** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:24 pm UTC

Granted. Werewolf wishes come with silver bones, free!

I wish Firefly would continue...

Click link. Receive my face. · by **bbctol** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:26 pm UTC

Uwe Boll will be directing.

I wish my name was Humberto.

by **Rodan** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:29 pm UTC

granted, but Humberto just became slang for "man with shit for a face"

I wish I was a monkey.

by **PtS** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:30 pm UTC

Granted. Your name is Umbretoe.

I wish I wasn't addicted to these forums.

Edit: You are a monkey and we will find you at a dirty zoo.

by **crazyjimbo** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:36 pm UTC

Granted, instead you are addicted to http://www.xkdd.com

I wish I had an endless glass of Guiness

by **Token** » Fri May 18, 2007 9:38 pm UTC

EDIT: Granted. But the guinness is white and the head is black! It's like some kind of hideous mirror world!

I wish that a flaming monkey demon would ascend from hell to do my bidding and rid the world of ignorant and unpleasant people.

xkcd

Corrupt-a-wish

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