Corrupt-a-wish

For all your silly time-killing forum games.

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Randomizer
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Randomizer » Sun Jun 05, 2011 8:54 am UTC

Granted. However, it won't be the last or only wish in this thread that actually comes true. *Dun dun dun!*

I wish that the negative effects of SmoothBlade's previous wish won't apply to me.
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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Sun Jun 05, 2011 4:30 pm UTC

Granted, but now the negative effects of everyone else's wishes will

I wish my watch tazer only shot when i specifically pressed a button on it, so my accidentay wrist twisting stops shocking random people.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Nat » Sun Jun 05, 2011 8:01 pm UTC

granted, but it drives you mad with power and you taze your girlfriend ON PURPOSE.

I wish I went to hogwarts.

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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Sun Jun 05, 2011 10:54 pm UTC

Granted, You're there now, everyone harasses you because you're incapable of magic, and you die falling off a staircase.


I wish I could taze people though the internet. And I would be the only person capable of this, no one else, and i could not taze myself
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Drakohel
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Drakohel » Mon Jun 06, 2011 1:03 am UTC

You very quickly get locked up, after the police have used you to whittle down the stupid on the internet.

I wish I could submit this assignment online and not have to catch an hour-long train to uni just to hand it in.

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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Mon Jun 06, 2011 4:00 am UTC

Granted. You must submit your assignment online now, and just this very second, your entire state (provided you live in the US [if not, then your entire country{unless you have providences or counties or districts}]) loses power and internet access.


I wish my tazer watch also had a "return home" feature, teleporting my out of the jail and back to my house. Also, i would like to add the ability to taze multiple people at once. And for my watch not to run out of batteries from all this tazing and teleporting
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xX17GHDUDE17Xx
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby xX17GHDUDE17Xx » Mon Jun 06, 2011 4:08 am UTC

Granted, but the newly discovered teleportation technology is faulty so on your first return home trip you lose all of your toes.

I wish my brother was actually good at guitar... my poor ears!
"An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind" -Ghandi

Wrong. All that does is eliminate humanity's depth perception.

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Lorenz
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Lorenz » Mon Jun 06, 2011 2:08 pm UTC

Granted. He is amazing at guitar, and so, gets bored with it. He is now trying to play (and failing), the bagpipes.

I wish I had the ability to command people to do my biddings over the internet, that nobody could figure out it was my doing, and that everybody still connected to the internet.

jbwraith
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby jbwraith » Mon Jun 06, 2011 3:32 pm UTC

Unless you are a member of Anonymous- denied.

If you are, why are you wishing for this?

I wish my 8-string guitar would arrive in mint condition.

jbwraith
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby jbwraith » Mon Jun 06, 2011 3:32 pm UTC

Unless you are a member of Anonymous- denied.

If you are, why are you wishing for this?

I wish my 8-string guitar would arrive in mint condition.

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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Mon Jun 06, 2011 5:07 pm UTC

Granted. The rest of your possessions arrive burnt to a crisp however.


wish for my toes back, and for the teleportation on my watch to be perfect, without effecting my watches ability to taze
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Falkorr
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Falkorr » Mon Jun 06, 2011 6:30 pm UTC

Granted, but your toes are all in the wrong places, and your watch now doesn't actually tell the time.

I wish I could remember all this Islam stuff for my exam on Thursday.

EDIT: Wait, what? My post seems to have popped in late or something, I seem to have been ignored.
Last edited by Falkorr on Tue Jun 07, 2011 7:01 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Scyrus
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Scyrus » Mon Jun 06, 2011 7:07 pm UTC

Granted. However, your omnipotent watch now attaches itself to and belongs to me.

I wish I were immortal.

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Falkorr
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Falkorr » Mon Jun 06, 2011 7:15 pm UTC

Granted. However, you've also been thrown into the sun, meaning living in eternal pain.

I wish I could memorise the stuff for my test more easily.

EDIT: Damn, again?
Last edited by Falkorr on Tue Jun 07, 2011 7:00 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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xX17GHDUDE17Xx
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby xX17GHDUDE17Xx » Mon Jun 06, 2011 9:56 pm UTC

Granted, in 100 years there is an earthquake and you are swallowed into the earth. Nobody can hear your cries for help, and you lie there for eternity (or until the sun swallows you up/planet-sized asteroid destroys the earth).

I wish for some more tea
"An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind" -Ghandi

Wrong. All that does is eliminate humanity's depth perception.

Nat
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Nat » Mon Jun 06, 2011 10:16 pm UTC

granted with no ill effects, but your worry about waiting for ill effects ruins the tea.

I wish I could fly.

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xX17GHDUDE17Xx
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby xX17GHDUDE17Xx » Mon Jun 06, 2011 10:22 pm UTC

Granted. You may fly by jumping, but as soon as all of your body leaves the ground, you can only float up, side to side, and back and forth, never down. You can go down by grabbing onto objects and pulling yourself, but this is still really a hassle.

I wish the TNT in G.E.B. made even a lick of sense to me...
"An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind" -Ghandi

Wrong. All that does is eliminate humanity's depth perception.

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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Tue Jun 07, 2011 12:25 am UTC

Granted, you now believe that its all about licking things


I wish for my tazer watch back from scyrus who's is buried underground, and for it to permanently attach to me
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jendral_hxr
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby jendral_hxr » Tue Jun 07, 2011 2:53 am UTC

Granted, permanently attached right beside your kidney

I wish for wicked wishes
I wish I weren't so stupid

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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Tue Jun 07, 2011 3:49 pm UTC

Granted, however you must sacrifice the right to own, touch, or even mention a road bicycle or road bicycles again



I wish for some pancakes
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Lorenz
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Lorenz » Tue Jun 07, 2011 4:26 pm UTC

Granted. You have a big stack of delicious pancakes, with all kinds of syrup on the side, butter, fruits, chocolate, and any other kind of topping you might want. The pancakes are always warm, and have an amazing smell. You are not allowed to eat them.

I wish I could eat the pancakes.

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Falkorr
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Falkorr » Tue Jun 07, 2011 6:58 pm UTC

Granted. You may not, however, eat/drink the syrup, butter, fruit, chocolate and other toppings, which by now have soaked into the said pancakes.

I wish I could enter the world of any videogame I chose.

Nat
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Nat » Tue Jun 07, 2011 8:28 pm UTC

Granted, but you lose your taste buds. also bender mugs you.

I wish I ran on nuclear power and never had to eat or go to the bathroom.

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Scyrus
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Scyrus » Tue Jun 07, 2011 11:23 pm UTC

Granted, you now run on nuclear fission power. The radioactivity soon kills you.

I wish for the power to instantly read all information I want from a book just by leaning my forehead against it.

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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Tue Jun 07, 2011 11:29 pm UTC

Granted, however you forget something for every 100 pages you learn. And im running after you with a bunch of phone books


I wish that the pancakes that i wished for were infact poisonous, and lorenz had ingested said poisonous pancakes. (HA! trapped you Lorenz!)
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Randomizer
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Randomizer » Wed Jun 08, 2011 2:29 am UTC

Denied. Said wish requires time travel to be involved, which must be explicitly wished for to be granted.

I wish for a fully functioning NES system and a large stack of various NES games to go with it. Also, controllers.
Belial wrote:I'm all outraged out. Call me when the violent rebellion starts.

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xX17GHDUDE17Xx
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby xX17GHDUDE17Xx » Wed Jun 08, 2011 2:33 am UTC

Granted, but the games break quickly and now.... blowing on them doesn't work anymore!

I wish my friends would shut up about Fallout New Vegas
"An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind" -Ghandi

Wrong. All that does is eliminate humanity's depth perception.

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Scyrus
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Scyrus » Wed Jun 08, 2011 7:36 pm UTC

Granted. Now your family members are on pins and needles about it, though.

I wish I didn't have to put a clothespin on my headphones' volume control for them to work properly.

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bantler
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bantler » Wed Jun 08, 2011 9:47 pm UTC

Granted. Your walkman is stolen (yes, you still use a walkman).

I wish I was a little bit taller.

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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Thu Jun 09, 2011 12:45 am UTC

Granted, however this is because both of your feet have developed tumors.


I wish Randomizer would stop aiding Lorenz in his world domination schemes. I also wish that wishes cannot be denied.
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jendral_hxr
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby jendral_hxr » Thu Jun 09, 2011 6:57 am UTC

Granted, Randomizer's just issued "1000 People Related to World Domination Schemes" of which doesn't include Lorenz on the list.

I wish for more road bicycle-related wishes
I wish I weren't so stupid

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TheSweetKill
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby TheSweetKill » Thu Jun 09, 2011 11:05 pm UTC

Denied no wants to hear it :P

I wish to have chocolate chip pancakes
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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Thu Jun 09, 2011 11:20 pm UTC

I grant both wishes because of my earlier wish for all wishes to be granted. Your chocolate chip pancakes are yours, you just need to head to central antarctica to get them. And there shall be more road bicycle-related wishes, but not until you stop checking these forums.


I wish for Lorenz to lose all his Russian funding and weapon stockpiles
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existential_squirrrel
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby existential_squirrrel » Fri Jun 10, 2011 4:27 am UTC

Granted... he gives them all to me, and you cannot find me


I wish I could get started on my research project early.
courage is about knowing when to pick yourself up and whisper to yourself, "I will try again tomorrow"
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Lorenz
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Lorenz » Fri Jun 10, 2011 2:05 pm UTC

Granted. You can start it, however, it'll take 25 years to finish, and by the time you do, the subject you are researching will have been deemed erroneous.

I wish I was now funded by the European Union.

Nat
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Nat » Fri Jun 10, 2011 11:25 pm UTC

Granted, but they don't give you much money and don't allow you to go to anyone else for money either. Also they get you lots of popsicles, which makes your teeth rot.

I wish I had good teeth with no holes or anything.

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existential_squirrrel
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby existential_squirrrel » Sat Jun 11, 2011 12:01 am UTC

granted... mow you have horrible vision that glasses/contacts/LASIK cannot correct.


I wish for some high quality bike tires
courage is about knowing when to pick yourself up and whisper to yourself, "I will try again tomorrow"
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RedBandit
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby RedBandit » Sat Jun 11, 2011 2:24 am UTC

Granted! The next time you leave the house, a strange sound fills the air. Looking up reveals thousands of bike tires falling endlessly on your head.

I wish for the ability to control all plant life.
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SmoothBlade
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SmoothBlade » Sat Jun 11, 2011 4:20 am UTC

Granted, you can now control all plant life, but you have absolutely no idea how


I wish Lorenz was arrested by the chinese government, tortured and killed in some remote camp in the interior of china. I also wish that he doesnt give the chinese russian secrets during the process.
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Randomizer
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Randomizer » Sat Jun 11, 2011 7:47 am UTC

Granted. You are now directly responsible for another human being's terrible suffering and death. To make things worse, Lorenz was the last person alive who knew those secrets you so desperately wanted to obtain, and now they are lost forever.

I wish to start a fake conspiracy which gains the attention of throngs of people, whom I can later exploit to achieve real power.
Belial wrote:I'm all outraged out. Call me when the violent rebellion starts.


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