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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2011 10:17 pm UTC
by SmoothBlade
Granted, but as soon as the bowl of spaghetti appears in front of you, it collapses all over you hands and on the floor, should have wish for a bowl full of spaghetti, not a bowl of spaghetti, eh?


I wish that I was alive again, Lorenz finally killed me, but I am currently possessing some random dude. BTW, I wish I had my old body back, without any injury, aswell. And a can of cashews, full of cashews. This guy also has a rash in his crotch, and thats annoying the hell outta me, so grant this wish soon.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:07 pm UTC
by Lorenz
Granted. You are alive again. You are perfectly healthy, but every step you take will injure your crotch. That's the price to pay for getting your body back.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:44 pm UTC
by TheSweetKill
granted you get nothing

i wish for a smart AI that was loyal to me and never would betray and didn't require much memory soace or power to run it

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2011 12:57 pm UTC
by a-wan
Granted! American Idol Taylor Hicks is now your loyal servant, but his memory has been shot due to a brain injury caused by excessive hip gyration so he requires constant care to keep him from further injuring himself.

I wish I knew more programming languages.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2011 4:03 pm UTC
by Randomizer
Granted! You now know of 1434 different programming languages!

I wish that Lulzsec would be brought to justice.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2011 10:42 pm UTC
by jendral_hxr
Granted, it turns out that Lulzsec's leader is your mom.

I wish world is less complicated.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Fri Jun 24, 2011 3:14 am UTC
by SmoothBlade
Granted, articles like "the" and "a" no longer exist. as proof of this, "the" was removed from your wish.


I wish articles existed again.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Fri Jun 24, 2011 6:13 am UTC
by Chuff
Granted, but they're all written by the Huffington Post and Fox News, working as a committee.


I wish I hadn't made that terrible pun, just now.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2011 3:50 am UTC
by SmoothBlade
Not granted, (I am heavily conservative and you just tainted the forum games with politics, that has it's own forum, no need to bother with it here.)


I wish for a mended crotch, and for lorenz's crotch to break and remain broken no matter how many times lorenz wishes for his crotch to be mended.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2011 4:12 am UTC
by Randomizer
Granted. But because the crotch of his pants cannot be mended, he wears a skirt instead. And sends you pictures.

I wish I could rationally and coherently speak to people while I was sleeping.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2011 9:22 am UTC
by Drakohel
Granted. You can't remember anything you speak about when you're asleep, though, so you spend much of your waking life having entire conversations again to keep you up to speed.

I wish work didn't make me quite so jaded.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 5:52 am UTC
by Sean Quixote
Granted.
Image

I wish I could think of a cleverly self-referential thing to meta-wish for.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 3:38 pm UTC
by a-wan
Granted, you have now been inspired with an extremely clever self-referential meta wish that only makes sense in Ayapenec (which is currently only spoken by two people who don't use the internet and don't even speak to each other).

I wish for the ability to stop and start time whenever I want.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 6:21 am UTC
by Lorenz
Granted. When you stop time nothing happens, when you resume it appears as if you had never had stopped it in the first place.

I wish for a palace, everyone is invited. Especially the next poster, since I like him so much. Smoothblade, however, is not invited, since I hate him so much. I do not think this wish can bring upon any inconsistencies.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 9:02 pm UTC
by CorruptUser
Granted, but I'm a terrible house-guest and you should've known better than to invite me into your home. I'll spare you the details, but you probably should avoid your bathrooms until the Haz-Mat teams arrive. And the olympic swimming pool, and the wine cellar, and the miniature course, and the Arena. Didn't know you had an arena? You do now! Well, did.

I wish for a commercially viable method of harvesting spider silk (no, feeding people to the spiders doesn't count; I already asked OSHA about that).

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2011 5:06 am UTC
by Atomicbeachball
Granted, but the spiders you were harvesting the silk from were apparently Lorenz's minions, and the ate you for ruining their master's palace. (Thanks for inviting me, Lorenz! :D )


I wish I had a Nintendo 3DS and LOZ: OOT 3D. (That game is BOSS)

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 7:24 pm UTC
by xx75vulcan
granted; but your batteries are dead.

I wish I had an invisibility cloak.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 3:40 pm UTC
by a-wan
Granted. You had an invisibility cloak. You don't anymore.

I wish to have a computer that no one else knows about that does my work competently for me.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 3:53 am UTC
by jendral_hxr
a-wan wrote:I wish to have a computer that no one else knows about that does my work competently for me.

Granted, you have 512-characters string in your login screen password, good luck!

I wish I were sexier.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 9:15 am UTC
by Evengeduld
jendral_hxr wrote:I wish I were sexier.


Granted tomorrow you wake up sexier however humans will not find you sexy, birds on the other hand...

I wish for a way to find unlimited money...

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 5:08 pm UTC
by xX17GHDUDE17Xx
Granted. You are jailed for producing counterfeit bills.

I wish it would rain.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sat Jul 09, 2011 3:01 am UTC
by Randomizer
Granted. The only wish in this entire thread which ever has been or ever will be not corrupted in any way, shape, or form was spent on something exceedingly ordinary and bound to happen regardless.

I wish that the next post would prove to be insightful into the nature of internet-facilitated human social behaviors.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sat Jul 09, 2011 5:33 am UTC
by thorgold
Granted. However, the life-changing, epiphany-stirring message of this post is hidden to all but the worthy. This was not meant for you.

I wish that I could better understand John Galt's radio message from Atlas Shrugged. 13 pages at a time or I fry :oops:

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2011 2:26 pm UTC
by blademan9999
Your brain melts.
(Lets make our wishes something to do with the answer to the previous one.
I wish his brain didn't melt.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2011 5:59 pm UTC
by Lorenz
You had changed your brain with thorgold's, so, technically his brain DID melt, but it was now your brain. His new brain is now un-meltable.

I wish blademan9999 couldn't reference the previous post in his wishes.
(Hey.. this has to do with the answer to the previous one, which asked for this restriction in parenthesis)

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2011 6:39 pm UTC
by blademan9999
Granted but I reference the next post and creates a large time paradox.
I wish the time paradox was gone.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 1:21 am UTC
by Randomizer
Your wish is both granted and not granted, making the wish itself a paradox.

I wish I knew whether I granted the previous wish. Paradoxes (and properly creating them) can be a bit confusing sometimes.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 3:09 am UTC
by CorruptUser
Granted, you granted the wish, while your evil twin from the alternate dimension (all alternate dimensions are evil) didn't grant the wish. This is to be resolved via fight to the death with your evil twin.

I wish that "Good" Randomizer wins the fight to the death.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 7:13 pm UTC
by blademan9999
Granted, but he is mortally wounded in the fight.
I wish he was healed,

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 7:20 pm UTC
by CorruptUser
Granted, but it was after a Necromancer raised him.

I wish for my consciousness to be transferred over to von Neuman machines.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 7:26 pm UTC
by blademan9999
Yes but they are used to try and destroy a peaceful civilization.
I wish the probes would fail and randomizer to be un-necrofied.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 7:41 pm UTC
by CorruptUser
Granted, the me-machines instead consume everything else instead of that specific peaceful civilization. Including Randomizer. The me-machines assemble a new Randomizer, with all the memories of the old one.

I wish for a giant rail-gun to spread my machine-self throughout the galaxy.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 8:07 pm UTC
by blademan9999
Granted, but they all get wiped out by another civilization's probe swarms.
I wish those probe swarms would be destroyed by an army led by randomizer's best friend.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 8:16 pm UTC
by Spots
Granted, they are destroyed before they wipe out the corrupt-machines, leaving them to again try to destroy a peaceful civilization. Actually, make that peaceful civilizations around the galaxy.

I wish the peaceful civilizations would prevail.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2011 4:01 am UTC
by thorgold
Granted, but unfortunately the peaceful civilizations, in the act of winning the conflict, become aggressive, war-mongering civilizations themselves.

I wish for more Cheetos.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2011 5:02 am UTC
by blademan9999
Granted but the Cheetos turn out to be berserker probes sent by one of the newly aggressive civilizations.
I wish the civilization that sent the Robo - Cheetos would deactivate them and become peaceful.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2011 10:49 pm UTC
by Sean Quixote
Granted, but not before they take over the Earth.

I wish for a human resistance movement that will one day prevail against the Cheetobots.

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2011 11:18 pm UTC
by the mishanator
granted, now it is simple: you are in a coma

i wish for a tardis

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2011 4:08 am UTC
by CorruptUser
Granted, the Me-Machines have built a Tardis before our defeat at the battle of Cheeto Valley, as a last resort for retreat/survival. Activate at your own risk.

I wish someone activates it :twisted:

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2011 4:43 am UTC
by blademan9999
Granted, but more probes take control of it. (This galaxy is a real mess isn't it.)
I wish for Sean to wake up and take the TARDIS from the probes.