Good News, Bad News

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Queen Arasene
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Queen Arasene » Tue Aug 02, 2016 1:08 pm UTC

Bad news: In order to hasten the process, you are provided with one- and she doesn't like you.
It's Magic. I ain't gonna explain shit.

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Tue Aug 02, 2016 1:19 pm UTC

Good news: you can sue them for forcing someone to be your girlfriend against their will.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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eran_rathan
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby eran_rathan » Tue Aug 02, 2016 5:22 pm UTC

bad news: she's a lawyer.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Tue Aug 02, 2016 6:31 pm UTC

Good news: she is on your side. She is the one being forced to be your girlfriend.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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Queen Arasene
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Queen Arasene » Wed Aug 03, 2016 7:47 am UTC

Bad news: You still lose the case.
It's Magic. I ain't gonna explain shit.

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Wed Aug 03, 2016 8:03 am UTC

Good news, you come to an agreement with her: Partners in name only, you are both free to do whatever.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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Queen Arasene
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Queen Arasene » Wed Aug 03, 2016 3:38 pm UTC

Bad news: You still have to spend a week at home together. The government added a bit on to your original punishment for your rebellious spirit.
It's Magic. I ain't gonna explain shit.

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Sableagle
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Sableagle » Wed Aug 03, 2016 4:01 pm UTC

Good news: you like designing and making ladieswear, she likes modelling ladieswear and you have a huge supply of fabric, thread, pins, needles, scissors, tailor's chalk, tape measures, paper, pencils and so on.
Oh, Willie McBride, it was all done in vain.

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eran_rathan
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby eran_rathan » Wed Aug 03, 2016 4:38 pm UTC

bad news: you're terrible at it. Like a left-handed 4 year old with safety scissors bad.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Wed Aug 03, 2016 6:21 pm UTC

Good news: Netflix just released a new series you love.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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bug sniper
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby bug sniper » Thu Aug 04, 2016 6:36 am UTC

Bad News: It's in 1080p only on AppleTV and the Safari browser due to a special deal between Netflix and Apple. For everyone else, it's in 480p.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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Queen Arasene
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Queen Arasene » Thu Aug 04, 2016 7:21 am UTC

Good news: You have AppleTV and can watch it in the best resolution possible.
It's Magic. I ain't gonna explain shit.

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Thu Aug 04, 2016 10:50 am UTC

Bad news: with a framerate of 0.001 Hz.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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Queen Arasene
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Queen Arasene » Mon Aug 15, 2016 9:52 am UTC

Good news: Your second favorite show is still on in as high quality as ever.
It's Magic. I ain't gonna explain shit.

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Mon Aug 15, 2016 10:00 am UTC

Bad news: every time you sit down you really urgently need to pee.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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Queen Arasene
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Queen Arasene » Wed Aug 17, 2016 3:46 pm UTC

Good news: You can fix this problem by relocating to the bathroom and sitting down on the toilet.
It's Magic. I ain't gonna explain shit.

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Wed Aug 17, 2016 5:14 pm UTC

Bad news: you get dehydrated.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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SDK
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby SDK » Thu Aug 18, 2016 4:19 pm UTC

Good news: Dehydration results in hallucinations. Yours are awesome.
The biggest number (63 quintillion googols in debt)

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eran_rathan
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby eran_rathan » Thu Aug 18, 2016 5:34 pm UTC

bad news: until they become real.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ

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SDK
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby SDK » Thu Aug 18, 2016 7:19 pm UTC

Good news: Your imagination ensures you are prepared for imaginary combat against the worst monsters imaginable.
The biggest number (63 quintillion googols in debt)

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Fri Aug 19, 2016 3:04 pm UTC

Bad news: there are also some unimaginable horrors attacking you.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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SDK
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby SDK » Fri Aug 19, 2016 4:10 pm UTC

Good news: They are quite fluffy and more willing to cuddle than fight.
The biggest number (63 quintillion googols in debt)

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Fri Aug 19, 2016 10:26 pm UTC

Bad news: they have a really foul breath.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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bug sniper
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby bug sniper » Mon Aug 22, 2016 5:32 am UTC

Good News: You're wearing a gas mask.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Mon Aug 22, 2016 7:06 am UTC

Bad news: the gas your mask is made of disperses quickly
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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SDK
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby SDK » Mon Aug 22, 2016 3:08 pm UTC

Good news: The mask gas smells of fresh strawberries and lingers in the air for the next several hours.
The biggest number (63 quintillion googols in debt)

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eran_rathan
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby eran_rathan » Mon Aug 22, 2016 3:20 pm UTC

Bad news, you're deathly allergic to strawberries.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Mon Aug 22, 2016 8:10 pm UTC

Good news: it's how you've always wanted to die.
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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SDK
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby SDK » Mon Aug 22, 2016 9:41 pm UTC

Bad news: Your imagination was not nearly as painful as this!
The biggest number (63 quintillion googols in debt)

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Neil_Boekend
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Neil_Boekend » Tue Aug 23, 2016 6:28 am UTC

Good news: you enjoy pain
Mikeski wrote:A "What If" update is never late. Nor is it early. It is posted precisely when it should be.

patzer's signature wrote:
flicky1991 wrote:I'm being quoted too much!

he/him/his

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SDK
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby SDK » Tue Aug 23, 2016 7:15 pm UTC

Bad news: If you die, the pain will stop.
The biggest number (63 quintillion googols in debt)

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eran_rathan
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby eran_rathan » Tue Nov 15, 2016 4:05 pm UTC

good news, this thread died along with you.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ

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bug sniper
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby bug sniper » Mon Nov 28, 2016 6:03 am UTC

Bad News: A necromancer arrives to bring you back from the dead with insensitivity to pain. Meanwhile, this thread is revived purely for your own torment.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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eran_rathan
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby eran_rathan » Mon Nov 28, 2016 12:24 pm UTC

good news: you dance to the Masochism Tango.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
nɒʜƚɒɿ_nɒɿɘ

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phillip1882
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Dec 05, 2016 1:46 am UTC

bad news: everyone hates the way you dance.
good luck have fun

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Sableagle
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Sableagle » Mon Dec 26, 2016 9:25 am UTC

Good news: nobody is actually watching you dance.
Oh, Willie McBride, it was all done in vain.

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bug sniper
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby bug sniper » Mon Jan 02, 2017 7:38 pm UTC

Bad News: When you wake up from this weird dream, it's time to go to your job as an information security analyst. The router has detected some suspicious traffic patterns so you'll have to work overtime to figure out what's going on.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

Opipik
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Opipik » Sun Jan 08, 2017 9:30 am UTC

Good news: You figure quickly who caused them, no overtime for you!

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Sableagle
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby Sableagle » Sun Jan 08, 2017 1:01 pm UTC

Bad news: without doing overtime you don't make £18,600 after tax, can't sponsor a spousal visa and have to say goodbye to your beloved Vietnamese wife.
Oh, Willie McBride, it was all done in vain.

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emlightened
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Re: Good News, Bad News

Postby emlightened » Sun Jan 08, 2017 7:22 pm UTC

Good news: It was an arranged marriage, and that was the plan anyway!
← approximately how gay I am.
"a nebulous cloud of different combinations of styling bodily features"
"on either side of a wrought iron fence made of tigers"


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