Male Teenage Hair Advice - Not looking like a dork.

[Benny the Bear]

Hey guys, I'm looking for some advice as to what to do to with my hair. I look and feel like a dork and I'd like to change it.

The new style must not:

-Have any colouring.
-Be long enough so that it touches my collar

Those are the school rules.

Other notes:

-I'm willing to grow it further, so feel free to make suggestions assuming it is longer. However I want to do something now, at least as a place holder between now and when it's longer.
-Money shouldn't be a problem.
-Try stay below ten minutes maintenance in the morning, but I'm flexible in that regard.
-These pictures were taken today.
-Your help is truly appreciated.

Spoiler:

Again, thanks for your time.

[JayDee]

I always found that using gel to make messy hair worked fairly well. Minimal effort. Like so:

[Marbas]

Give yourself a hair halo!

I would love to see someone with a discus made entirely out of hair atop their head. If you put enough gel in it you could use it as a weapon and be feared from here to the Himalayas!

[Robin S]

The new style must not:

-Have any colouring.
-Be long enough so that it touches my collar

Those are the school rules.

I'm fairly certain my high school had those rules too, but everyone ignored them by the time we got to the sixth form (last two years before university). I don't know whether that would apply to you, but just saying.

I mention this partly because, in my opinion, having no hairstyle whatsoever is underrated. I know some people who haven't had their hair cut (or, as far as I know, styled) in years.

[DuSTman]

I've also been trying to think of something else to do with my hair - main problem (although I'm sure there's a bright side to it) is how dense it is. Longer than an inch and a half it looks like an amateurish toupee, and shorter than that I look more like a gosling. This would seem to preclude a lot of options..

[Hoags]

I recently got a haircut. My hair wasn't very long, but the damn stuff just seemed to grow -outwards-, so I had it cut and layered. More than one person had compared me to the 1-up mushroom before I had it done. I'm gonna have to second the slightly messy look. I had mine done a similar length to yours, but with a slightly longer fringe, and it looks good wet and very scruffy, or dry and a bit scruffy.

Get some styling products and experiment in front of a mirror. Worst thing that can happen is you have fun but don't end up with any new ideas.

[Benny the Bear]

Link

I like the first and second ones. About the second one, could this be made to be longer? Is this realistic to obtain?

[Robin S]

Just misread the title of this thread as "Miss Teenage Hair Advice".

[MoonBuggy]

I've said it in the shaving threads and now I'll say it in the hair thread: product is everything. Through trial and error I've used pretty much the full price spectrum and, unfortunately, good ones are expensive. It's worth it though and they tend to last forever. Have you used any kind of hair product in the pictures?

Also, I wonder whether highlights count as 'colour'? I think the second one in the link would suit you well, but with some semi-natural looking highlights (i.e. not bright blonde streaks).

[El Senor Fruit Swing]

a profile picture of you please



mybe..

[steelfrog]

I shaved my head in high school and never looked back. Once you get used to it, it only takes about 5 minutes or so and you always look very clean, very slick.

Obviously it's not for everyone but might be worth a shot if you're really out of ideas.

[d3adf001]

#2

[MFHodge]

I second the advice about buying quality styling products. You can get bottles of hair gel ranging from $2 to $30+. The stuff I like (American Crew) is about $18 and lasts forever, since you don't need very much every day. The cheap stuff doesn't work well at all.

[aetherson]

i prefer to use a styling wax muhself.
gel just makes it look all spikey like.
the wax gives more of the messy just got up kinda thing...

[MFHodge]

I think I'm going to try some wax, actually.

[cypherspace]

I use fibre putty (not entirely sure whether it comes under either wax or gel), but yes, some kind of holding material is needed.

[Freakish]

I'm probably going to be dying my hair green some time this week . Back when I use to spike my hair, I used "Ice" hair gel. Pretty powerful stuff; I was able to do a straight up spike even when my hair was 2-3". I'd personally just get rid of the oilie look. If your hair is as thick as mine is it'll require shampooing twice in the morning (lather rinse)x2 and once more half way through the day.

The pinnacle of my hair care will be dying it, other then that I just shampoo it twice a day and dry it. No combing.

[Fargren]

I shaved my head in high school and never looked back. Once you get used to it, it only takes about 5 minutes or so and you always look very clean, very slick.

I fully support this idea/product.
I did that last month, and I'm loving it. Feels a bit weird at first, but you get used to it.

[wst]

Shaved tends to make you look 'thuggish', unless your head is small. Mine would look like the moon though, massive head.

For less maintenance don't put gel/was/any of that crap on it. It doesn't have to defy gravity. Just go to a decent hairdresser and get them to shape it well so it supports itself, and isn't a pudding bowl, and sweep it slightly to one side. If it curls inwards to your forehead, get them to straighten it or curl it outwards a bit, that'll stop it going in your eyes, etc.

No centre parting. I did that once

[Goatboy]

a profile picture of you please

[picture]

mybe..

Is that a Get Up Kids shirt? I recognize it, but can't quite place it.

[Avram]

I've learned that paying more for a haircut is usually worth it. The last three cuts I got are from a friend of my sister who used to be a professional, and she only charges half of what she would have charged when she cut hair full-time. It still ends up being about %60 more than a haircut from the place down the street, but it's definitely worth it.

EDIT: oh yeah, suggestions. Here are a few:

1 - I second the hair wax suggestion. Your hair seems to cling pretty closely to your head, so you'll want to tousle it a bit so it doesn't look shrink-wrapped.
2 - Can you grow any sideburns at all? Growing them about halfway down the ear is a good idea.
3 - I suggest growing your bangs/fringe out more. You can also use something in your hair so that it sticks out/up instead of clinging to your forehead.
4 - Make sure that the hair in the back doesn't just end suddenly. This makes your hair look like a helmet. It's probably not a big deal, but it annoys me when I see it.
5 - Your head has a kind of egg-shape when seen from the front. I'm not exactly sure how this sort of thing is fixed; taking hair off the sides maybe? Here is a picture for reference:

(Note how Sufjan Steven's head is shaped less like an egg and more like a box.

You know what, why don't you just look through a bunch of pictures of Sufjan Stevens yourself? He's pretty much my standard for male sexiness.

[CivilDefense700]

Go for the 19th century look, I garantee you no one will have the same haircut as you!

[stormgren]

I second shaved or buzzed down to next to nothing. I just did it for swimming (decided not to wear a cap this year) and to my surprise, now that it's grown out a few millimeters it looks great.

Otherwise just mess it up as much as you can. Go for the "just got out of bed" look.

[Cheese]

I've said it in the shaving threads and now I'll say it in the hair thread: product is everything. Through trial and error I've used pretty much the full price spectrum and, unfortunately, good ones are expensive. It's worth it though and they tend to last forever. Have you used any kind of hair product in the pictures?

Not about styling products, but block shampoo's the best option for longer hair (mine's about 6 inches past my collar (I'm fairly flexible concerning length/distance measurements - some things are in metres, others are in inches. I don't use the imperial system for anything much longer than a few feet, though)), as it lasts for months and months (depends on the size of block you buy) and is much, much cheaper than the amount of bottled shampoo that would last for the same amount of time.

As a suggestion for BtB's hair: Grow it to a few centimetres long, then gel it into 'spikes' (something like this, but probably a bit longer). I have a friend who does this, it looks quite good, and I don't think he takes much more than 5 minutes to do it every morning.

[Angelene]

1. J'adore Mr Sufjan, he is really rather an attractive young man, agreed. Sadly I'm of the wrong gender.

2. El Senor Fruit Boy...question please...how can you see where you're going at any given time?

3. I realise how very little help I'm being but really I think it's all trial and error anyway...play with it at its current length and you should get some idea as to how much you need to cut/grow before it becomes something more manageable for you. Obviously a good hair cut is everything, but you should be able to have some notion with it as is.

[Numquam]

I hate to say this but... Your going to XKCD to ask how not to look like a dork?

[Angelene]

I hate to say this but... Your going to XKCD to ask how not to look like a dork?

Silly creature you are, you with your stereotypes and your small mind.

[MoonBuggy]

Indeed. Apart from anything else the attractiveness of the xkcd population can be proven simply by applying a small amount of Science™ to the Post yo' face thread.

Spoiler:

In my search for the ™ symbol, I ended up going through every special character on my keyboard. Here is the result:
¡€#¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨^øπ“‘åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æ«`Ω≈ç√∫~µ≤≥÷
⁄™‹›fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„‰ÂÊÁËÈØ∏”’ÅÍÎÏÌÓÔÒÚÆ»ŸÛÙÇ◊ıˆ˜¯˘¿

[d3adf001]

everyone knows its knox gelatin and elmers glue. i never needed the glue but the knox does work but you smell funny and its all sticky

[njpsy]

If money isn't a problem then your best bet it to talk to a professional. Pick a higher end salon and talk to one of the hair dressers. They should be able to give a good range of options.

Be sure to ask their opinion too, they should be up on current fashion trends. They will be able to cut your hair into something you like.

[Angelene]

Be sure to ask their opinion too, they should be up on current fashion trends. They will be able to cut your hair into something you like.

Well, no, they'll likely cut it into something they like, unless he has a rather clear picture in his mind as to what it is he wants.

[__Kit]

I've always been anit-product (/skub) for some reason. I think shaved would look fine.

[Shadow Tyrant]

2. El Senor Fruit Boy...question please...how can you see where you're going at any given time?

It really irks me when people assume this about anyone with long hair. They [we] can see just fine. It's the same thing as looking through something mesh. From far away you can't really see in, but when it's up closer, the gaps are bigger and it's easy to see through. Next time, think before you assume something retarded.

[Angelene]

2. El Senor Fruit Boy...question please...how can you see where you're going at any given time?

It really irks me when people assume this about anyone with long hair. They [we] can see just fine. It's the same thing as looking through something mesh. From far away you can't really see in, but when it's up closer, the gaps are bigger and it's easy to see through. Next time, think before you assume something retarded.

Dear Really Irked,

Okay, do me a favour please? Read what you've just quoted from me. Ask yourself this : was this an assumption in any shape or form, or was it a genuine question? When you realise it was indeed the latter you should really apologise for your abrupt and unfair manner.

Also, I would not equate seeing through mesh with "seeing just fine"...but that's a matter of opinion, I would suppose. And my question was initially motivated because I've had to grow out many a fringe and had my vision seriously obstructed by hair in the past.

Kind Regards,
Apparently Retarded

[The Mighty Thesaurus]

The new style must not:

-Have any colouring.
-Be long enough so that it touches my collar

Those are the school rules.

Fuck. That. Shit.

I've always been anit-product (/skub) for some reason. I think shaved would look fine.

PRO SKUB!

[SecondTalon]

Go with something lame like the Ceaser... well, not lame, but traditional and expected..

or...

Obey the letter of the sexist law (Alright, I admit I'm saying that a bit early. Perhaps females are also required to keep their hair above the collar. Somehow I doubt this) and get a Khokhol

Choose.

[The Mighty Thesaurus]

LIBERTY SPIKES!

[SecondTalon]

Hmm.. would a School Administration threatening to suspend a person over Liberty Spikes be ironic enough? Or would the School's Superintendent also have to be the leader of the local ACLU to get irony cred?

[__Kit]

PRO SKUB!

[Benny the Bear]

How about I just go into a salon, say what they can't do, and let them do something they think looks good? I think they would like the idea of 'fixing' someone anyway. Besides, I'll ask for a brief idea as to what they will do.

I'm really not in favour of shaving a lot of it off. I don't want the 'fatty cheeks' look.