How to trap a geek

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Dakun
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How to trap a geek

Postby Dakun » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:06 pm UTC

So from a thread on Love/Sex/Relationships - a woman was trying to 'catch' (metaphorically) a guy. We ended up going all literal on the topic, and had thoughts such as:

"Get a bear trap, use a text book or something as bait. VOILA!"

I than suggested an iPhone.

So, similar to "Nerd Sniping" - I pose this question:

There is a beartrap with something on it. What object (specifically geeky - but feel free to diverge) would you be willing to risk the pain / potential lose of arm for?

(Yes I know as a human with a Mind (tm) you can easily disarm the trap and take the goods - just humor me).
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby SecondTalon » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:10 pm UTC

Implantable cybernetic parts with above-human strength, speed, dexterity, and so forth.

Basically, I'll let you take my arm if I can get a nicer robot arm, a datajack implanted in my skull, one or both eyes replaced by ones that can see infrared/ultraviolet/by starlight, and so on.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Mo0man » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:15 pm UTC

I honestly can't think of anything. I need my arm for my gaming
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Kikral » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:26 pm UTC

An unlimited can of Rockstar or something.

Failing that, a regular can of Rockstar and a fresh cookie.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Amnesiasoft » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:33 pm UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Implantable cybernetic parts with above-human strength, speed, dexterity, and so forth.

I agree with that one. Then I can use my indestructible robotic arm to steal other cool things out of traps!

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby zahlman » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:57 pm UTC

Dakun wrote:a woman was trying to 'catch' (metaphorically) a guy. We ended up going all literal on the topic... There is a beartrap with something on it. What... would you be willing to risk the pain / potential lose of arm for?


Possibly, the woman. ;)
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Dakun » Wed Apr 23, 2008 5:05 pm UTC

I think I'd lose an arm for a portal gun.

Perhaps even a large sum of money - (25+ million) - although I do a lot of sports, not sure on this one.

"Possibly, the woman." - Clever, and romantic, but i'm not sure i've met a girl that his smitten me enough that i'd lose an appendage for.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Yakk » Wed Apr 23, 2008 5:59 pm UTC

A true geek would build a tool to extract the item safely.

So such a trap would never catch a geek!
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Popidge » Wed Apr 23, 2008 8:16 pm UTC

Yakk wrote:A true geek would build a tool to extract the item safely.

So such a trap would never catch a geek!


/thread i believe

Personally, i'm trying to resist a "Your Mom" joke here...

maybe some.. cake?
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby bbctol » Wed Apr 23, 2008 8:28 pm UTC

A friggin copy of GEB! My library sucks.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Upsilon » Wed Apr 23, 2008 9:08 pm UTC

Yakk wrote:A true geek would build a tool to extract the item safely.

Like a stick!
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Yakk » Wed Apr 23, 2008 9:43 pm UTC

Upsilon wrote:
Yakk wrote:A true geek would build a tool to extract the item safely.
Like a stick!
The geek-fu is strong with this one.
One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision - BR

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Lycur » Wed Apr 23, 2008 9:50 pm UTC

Upsilon wrote:
Yakk wrote:A true geek would build a tool to extract the item safely.

Like a stick!


A rocket powered stick!

Personally, I'd put a rocket-powered stick on the trap based on the following premise:
1. Geek sees rocket powered stick. Want.
2. Geek identifies that rocket powered still is on trap.
3. Geek realizes that a tool is needed to circumvent the trap.
4. Geek realizes a rocket powered stick would be ideal for the job.
5. Geek sees rocket powered stick.
6. repeat 2-5 until Geek's thought process has become arcane and incoherent
7. successfully trap Geek.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby tehmikey » Wed Apr 23, 2008 10:09 pm UTC

Lycur wrote:
Upsilon wrote:
Yakk wrote:A true geek would build a tool to extract the item safely.

Like a stick!


A rocket powered stick!

Personally, I'd put a rocket-powered stick on the trap based on the following premise:
1. Geek sees rocket powered stick. Want.
2. Geek identifies that rocket powered still is on trap.
3. Geek realizes that a tool is needed to circumvent the trap.
4. Geek realizes a rocket powered stick would be ideal for the job.
5. Geek sees rocket powered stick.
6. repeat 2-5 until Geek's thought process has become arcane and incoherent
7. successfully trap Geek.


Putting a geek into an infinite loop is not a pleasant site. I think there is a warning in one of the stickies on each forum about not doing this with javascript.
Now that I think about it... I could use a rocket powered stick. You win this round.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby michaelandjimi » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:19 am UTC

I may be missing something, but what function of a stick requires rocket power?
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Mr. Beck » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:49 am UTC

michaelandjimi wrote:I may be missing something, but what function of a stick requires rocket power?

What function of a stick doesn't require rocket power?
I want one of them rocket sticks...hey there's one...ahh my arm!...sweet, a rocket stick.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Pandercolour » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:59 am UTC

Gun with tranquilizer darts.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Yuri2356 » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:02 am UTC

Lycur wrote:
Upsilon wrote:
Yakk wrote:A true geek would build a tool to extract the item safely.

Like a stick!


A rocket powered stick!

Personally, I'd put a rocket-powered stick on the trap based on the following premise:
1. Geek sees rocket powered stick. Want.
2. Geek identifies that rocket powered still is on trap.
3. Geek realizes that a tool is needed to circumvent the trap.
4. Geek realizes a rocket powered stick would be ideal for the job.
5. Geek sees rocket powered stick.
6. repeat 2-5 until Geek's thought process has become arcane and incoherent
7. successfully trap Geek.

Simple solution:
1) Assemble own rocket-stick
2) Use rocket-stick to retreive rocket-stick
3) Now you have two! :D

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby goblin_subway » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:24 am UTC

Ok, on the trab-building idea, take into account that the target will attempt a lasso/ stick solution, and have a pressure switch under the prize that trips traps placed in the vicinity of the prize. You can also have traps next to/ around the prize for standard trapping.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Durinthal » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:37 am UTC

I honestly can't think of a single thing I would be willing to lose an arm for. I use them too much in activities like playing music and gaming.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby goblin_subway » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:44 am UTC

You assume you know the trap is there.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Durinthal » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:55 am UTC

Yes, that's assuming I know a trap's there. If I don't suspect anything, even a dollar bill is going to get my attention.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Cornelius » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:56 am UTC

I have to agree with the robot arms. maybe a full body replacement.

and all of the below.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Yawgmoth » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:59 am UTC

Some thing that gives me 21 levels in sorcerer and a license to kill.

Edit: Or becoming a lich. I'd totally risk it (or risk a stick, ha) for immortality and basic spellcasting.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby SecondTalon » Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:06 am UTC

Wait.. can I get cybernetic arms and 21 levels of Sorcerer?

Because I want that. And hell, give me 21 levels of Cleric while we're at it.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Emmaskillz » Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:21 am UTC

michaelandjimi wrote:I may be missing something, but what function of a stick requires rocket power?


This is a mighty fine point. I'm all for rocket power but rocket powered stick?

As far as the trap goes, I'd be more inclined to trap the geek in some incredible, elaborate library. I know that'd get me.

That reminds me that I need a new book to read. I don't like being without a good book.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby mrbaggins » Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:34 am UTC

An incredibly elaborate library labyrinth. With guards that stab people who ask where the exit is. And the people that speak too loudly.

Man, Dewey Decimal would have a field day in that place.

Edit, people don't speak to loudly, Loudly doesn't like conversation.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby michaelandjimi » Thu Apr 24, 2008 8:30 am UTC

I present to you the beautifully rendered rocket-powered stick.

Spoiler:
Image


It's in a picture - it must be true.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby the_bandersnatch » Thu Apr 24, 2008 8:59 am UTC

Durinthal wrote:I honestly can't think of a single thing I would be willing to lose an arm for. I use them too much in activities like playing music and gaming.


Not to mention all the things you use your hands for. Dirty, sinful things.
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby evilbeanfiend » Thu Apr 24, 2008 9:42 am UTC

the_bandersnatch wrote:
Durinthal wrote:I honestly can't think of a single thing I would be willing to lose an arm for. I use them too much in activities like playing music and gaming.


Not to mention all the things you use your hands for. Dirty, sinful things.


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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby the_bandersnatch » Thu Apr 24, 2008 9:47 am UTC

Exactly!
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Solt » Thu Apr 24, 2008 10:57 am UTC

Durinthal wrote:I honestly can't think of a single thing I would be willing to lose an arm for. I use them too much in activities like playing music and gaming.


World peace?
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby the_bandersnatch » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:20 pm UTC

Solt wrote:World peace?


Yes but once you get world peace and then the aliens find us ripe for invasion having disposed of our weapons, how are you going to wield a plank with a nail in to fight them off if you only have one arm?
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Yuri2356 » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:47 pm UTC

We don't dispose of our weapons, we put them in a storage locker under a mountain somewhere to be recovered in the event of such an invasion.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby the_bandersnatch » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:52 pm UTC

No, see that's a bad idea too, as you're only setting it up right for some supervillain type to come along and take over the mountain complex and with it the entire world's stockpile of weapons. Either that, or any invading aliens blow up the mountain before anything else...
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby SecondTalon » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:55 pm UTC

Yuri2356 wrote:We don't dispose of our weapons, we put them in a storage locker under a mountain somewhere to be recovered in the event of such an invasion.


You know what happens then? Giant alien robots land and have a battle in which some people are killed, and your society splinters and factionalizes over whether or not all of the giant alien robots are evil or if it's only the ones with a particular symbol while the other giant alien robots with a different symbol are respectable giant alien robots and they end up ripping their own goddamn heads off to prove a point, and then your beloved Prince and his friends have to get in robot suit things that let them take the place of the missing heads and work in a kind of mutual symbiosis to defeat the evil giant alien robots. And does anyone want that?

Besides Transformer fanboys obsessed with the Headmasters line?

(huh.. my memory was fairly accurate. Minus the Prince part, basically)
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby GCM » Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:59 pm UTC

the_bandersnatch wrote:
Solt wrote:World peace?


Yes but once you get world peace and then the aliens find us ripe for invasion having disposed of our weapons, how are you going to wield a plank with a nail in to fight them off if you only have one arm?


Easy. Get someone else to do it. World peace is a little more valuable than one arm. Except mine, of course. :D

What one item, hmm... a beartrap would be good bait. Then I could use it to catch another person!
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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby Yuri2356 » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:02 pm UTC

You know what happens then? Giant alien robots land and have a battle in which some people are killed, and your society splinters and factionalizes over whether or not all of the giant alien robots are evil or if it's only the ones with a particular symbol while the other giant alien robots with a different symbol are respectable giant alien robots and they end up ripping their own goddamn heads off to prove a point, and then your beloved Prince and his friends have to get in robot suit things that let them take the place of the missing heads and work in a kind of mutual symbiosis to defeat the evil giant alien robots. And does anyone want that?

Besides Transformer fanboys obsessed with the Headmasters line?

(huh.. my memory was fairly accurate. Minus the Prince part, basically)

Or we just lounge around quietly until a race of alien robots stop by to inform us that they're fighting a war against some very angry green fellows and were wondering if we could lend them any firepower. Then we break out the old weapons and bolt them on to some starships made of old Volkswagon parts and we're off to see the wizard!

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby |Erasmus| » Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:24 pm UTC

GCM wrote:
the_bandersnatch wrote:
Solt wrote:World peace?


Yes but once you get world peace and then the aliens find us ripe for invasion having disposed of our weapons, how are you going to wield a plank with a nail in to fight them off if you only have one arm?


Easy. Get someone else to do it. World peace is a little more valuable than one arm. Except mine, of course. :D

What one item, hmm... a beartrap would be good bait. Then I could use it to catch another person!


We can just have an infinite loop of bear traps within bear traps.

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Re: How to trap a geek

Postby bbctol » Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:45 pm UTC

|Erasmus| wrote:I'm a good person and don't make quote pyramids


We can just have an infinite loop of bear traps within bear traps.[/quote]

The very idea of such an infinite recursive series would fascinate some geeks enough that you wouldn't need bait at all.


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