xkcd

by **emceng** » Wed Mar 21, 2012 3:19 pm UTC

Only time I've used the pre-cooked, didn't need to soak them.

Also, stole this from /. The horror:

Next up, Bay takes on Wizard of Oz remake:

"Flying monkeys with bombs. Lots of bombs. Wicked witch with machine gun on broom! Megan as Dorothy! Toto upgraded to pit bull. Shia LeBoeuf will ace it as the Tin Man with laser-eyeballs and missile-firing butthatch! Cowardly Lion now a Mexican political-asylum refugee who knows how to fight! The Straw Man now the Token Black Gay Teenage Computer Wizard in a wheelchair. With glasses. And braces. Eats HotPockets and Pepsi and Pringles while racing against time.

Old plot bad, new plot good. Secret Oz government lab accidently released virus that mutates Munchkins into slobbering zombie vampires. Only Dorothy can save them because her blood has radical new antibodies. Witch nearly kills her, but sex with the Tin Man revives her. New totally unexpected ending not involving explosions!"

by **Sytri** » Thu Mar 22, 2012 1:06 pm UTC

It's a sports kit! Stop bloody complaining! Not enough red? Red makes you somehow run faster, longer, throw further and cycle better does it? No? Then stop moaning! Are you going to be wearing this kit for your own olympic performance this summer? No? Than stop complaining! If the real athletes like it and the kit does help, then it will be down to the fabrics used, where they are used and how. Colour is inconsequential apart from how it will make the participants wearing the outfits feel emotionally. And apparently they think it looks great and as a by-product of that they feel they can perform to their best abilities. So fuck off and stop taking up valuable comments board space with your inane chatter.

And breathe.

I really should stop reading BBC comments.

by **emceng** » Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:40 pm UTC

Freaking UN can suck my dick. Or fix their freaking website. God damn, how many broken links can you have? Every freaking thing I need leads to a broken link.

by **Tomlidich the second** » Thu Mar 22, 2012 5:46 pm UTC

so, ever since i got this new google acount, any account with the same password (i know, i know, i should have a different one for each site but i am lazy)

has completely and utterly failed to let me in. INCLUDING THIS ONE.

i had to re-register.

i am only SLIGHTLY ticked off. slightly.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU................................

by **Steax** » Fri Mar 23, 2012 2:01 am UTC

I am still appalled by the horrors that is the US's online visa registration.

And not just user interface issues either. The thing simply fails to load on every other refresh.

by **SecondTalon** » Fri Mar 23, 2012 4:09 am UTC

Steax wrote:I am still appalled by the horrors that is the US's online visa registration.

And not just user interface issues either. The thing simply fails to load on every other refresh.

Wait, it loads on every other refresh? I better call them, let them know their firewall is letting in Un-American Foreigner web-traffic.

by **SurgicalSteel** » Fri Mar 23, 2012 5:26 am UTC

Steax wrote:I am still appalled by the horrors that is the US's online visa registration.

And not just user interface issues either. The thing simply fails to load on every other refresh.

I'll let you in on a little secret: very few things funded by the U.S. government ever work properly.

by **Steax** » Fri Mar 23, 2012 5:50 am UTC

I'd forgive them for UI stupidity and general nutcrackery. But even not serving HTTP requests properly?

That's not to say it's without interface terrifyingsauce.

"Have you ever been to the US?"
"Yeah."
> Clicks "yes"
> Clicks "next"
Page loads... and loads... and loads
"Web server cannot be found."
> Refresh
"Have you ever been to the US?"
> Clicks "yes"
> Waits
Page suddenly loads in 20 new fields, asking for my old address, phone number, age of stay, number of passport at the time, length of visit in days, education obtained, money spent, and number of pizzas consumed
> Fills in fields painstakingly for 30 minutes
> Clicks "next"
Page loads... and loads... and loads
"Web server cannot be found."
> Refresh
"Have you ever been to the US?"
"Fuck."

I was only applying so I could go visit some friends, and it took me a grand total of 8 hours (including rummaging around for details of previous stays and waiting for the pages to even load) to finish the form.

by **Tomlidich the second** » Fri Mar 23, 2012 5:03 pm UTC

SurgicalSteel wrote:
Steax wrote:I am still appalled by the horrors that is the US's online visa registration.

And not just user interface issues either. The thing simply fails to load on every other refresh.
I'll let you in on a little secret: very few things funded by the U.S. government ever work properly.

i take it you have never worked hand-in-hand with government IT.

unfortunately, my company has......... where do they find these people? i have known people who flip burgers for a living with better computer skills.

by **The Scyphozoa** » Fri Mar 23, 2012 6:00 pm UTC

SurgicalSteel wrote:
Steax wrote:I am still appalled by the horrors that is the US's online visa registration.

And not just user interface issues either. The thing simply fails to load on every other refresh.
I'll let you in on a little secret: very few things funded by the U.S. government ever work properly.

The graphic they put up on sites that have been taken down by the government (megaupload for example)... is a .jpg. An image that's supposed to look official, with white text on a red background with an official logo, covered in .jpg artifacts. That alone can,tepp you something about the government's web prowess.

by **SurgicalSteel** » Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:44 am UTC

Tomlidich the second wrote:
SurgicalSteel wrote:
Steax wrote:I am still appalled by the horrors that is the US's online visa registration.

And not just user interface issues either. The thing simply fails to load on every other refresh.
I'll let you in on a little secret: very few things funded by the U.S. government ever work properly.

i take it you have never worked hand-in-hand with government IT.

unfortunately, my company has......... where do they find these people? i have known people who flip burgers for a living with better computer skills.

Wait. Are you agreeing with me?

by **e^iπ+1=0** » Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:54 am UTC

Things which are really not okay: playing incredibly loud music and screaming at nearly 3am. You are not surrounded by fucking impenetrable walls. Why do I need to keep telling you this?!

by **blue_eyedspacemonkey** » Sat Mar 24, 2012 7:17 am UTC

It's been gorgeous all week while I've been at work, now it's the weekend, still looking gorgeous (though it's still very early). Was looking forward to enjoying it...but I've been up for 2 hours with vomiting and diarrhoea >:(

WHY BODY WHY? It's not even food poisoning because my other half had the same thing and he's still sleeping like the proverbial log (not that I want him to be ill, just annoying that I have no idea where this has come from).

by **gorcee** » Sat Mar 24, 2012 11:39 pm UTC

I'm posting from a drive thru line behind some fuckass that ordered 87 things with coupons, so yeah. Go inside if you have that much shit, ffs.

by **ArgonV** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 12:23 am UTC

Why I'm mad? Let's see. I haven't seen you in months. You text me because you don't want to come back to your home town (which I still happen to live in) and have nothing to do. So you ask me what I'm doing for the next couple of nights. So I tell you that I haven't got anything to do and would love to make plans with you, 'cause I haven't seen you for some time. Then, after 1.5 hours without response, I get one. I can join you with people I don't know at <club A you know I don't like> or <club B I don't like>. Ok, no big deal. I'll just wait to the next day. Oh, you've got plans already? Oh, with your one friend you know I despise deeply, because he's incredibly bitchy and deeply possessive of you? Well, guess I skip this night as well then. It's just... I thought we were good friends and you'd seem to have indicated you wanted to see me as well.
Oh, so tonight I'm good enough to 'come over at that pub', because you're there already and everyone of your friends left already? You do remember I got classes at 08:45, right? Like I told you? Kinda feels like your taking me for granted, to be honest... So no, I won't be coming your way.

by **Giant Speck** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 2:55 am UTC

gorcee wrote:I'm posting from a drive thru line behind some fuckass that ordered 87 things with coupons, so yeah. Go inside if you have that much shit, ffs.

I just went through a drive-thru where someone walked up and started begging for money from each car in line.

by **gorcee** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 3:17 am UTC

Giant Speck wrote:
gorcee wrote:I'm posting from a drive thru line behind some fuckass that ordered 87 things with coupons, so yeah. Go inside if you have that much shit, ffs.

I just went through a drive-thru where someone walked up and started begging for money from each car in line.

Now that is some serious efficiency.

by **I Am Raven** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 7:46 am UTC

ArgonV wrote:Why I'm mad? Let's see. I haven't seen you in months. You text me because you don't want to come back to your home town (which I still happen to live in) and have nothing to do. So you ask me what I'm doing for the next couple of nights. So I tell you that I haven't got anything to do and would love to make plans with you, 'cause I haven't seen you for some time. Then, after 1.5 hours without response, I get one. I can join you with people I don't know at <club A you know I don't like> or <club B I don't like>. Ok, no big deal. I'll just wait to the next day. Oh, you've got plans already? Oh, with your one friend you know I despise deeply, because he's incredibly bitchy and deeply possessive of you? Well, guess I skip this night as well then. It's just... I thought we were good friends and you'd seem to have indicated you wanted to see me as well.
Oh, so tonight I'm good enough to 'come over at that pub', because you're there already and everyone of your friends left already? You do remember I got classes at 08:45, right? Like I told you? Kinda feels like your taking me for granted, to be honest... So no, I won't be coming your way.

Hugs.

by **Amie** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 10:50 am UTC

ArgonV wrote:Why I'm mad? Let's see. I haven't seen you in months. You text me because you don't want to come back to your home town (which I still happen to live in) and have nothing to do. So you ask me what I'm doing for the next couple of nights. So I tell you that I haven't got anything to do and would love to make plans with you, 'cause I haven't seen you for some time. Then, after 1.5 hours without response, I get one. I can join you with people I don't know at <club A you know I don't like> or <club B I don't like>. Ok, no big deal. I'll just wait to the next day. Oh, you've got plans already? Oh, with your one friend you know I despise deeply, because he's incredibly bitchy and deeply possessive of you? Well, guess I skip this night as well then. It's just... I thought we were good friends and you'd seem to have indicated you wanted to see me as well.
Oh, so tonight I'm good enough to 'come over at that pub', because you're there already and everyone of your friends left already? You do remember I got classes at 08:45, right? Like I told you? Kinda feels like your taking me for granted, to be honest... So no, I won't be coming your way.

Fuck. *hugs* if you want them. Glad you're standing your ground.

by **I Am Raven** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 3:29 pm UTC

Amie wrote:Glad you're standing your ground.

Yes, that's an admirable quality. Props.

by **ArgonV** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 4:02 pm UTC

Thanks guys!

by **Garm** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 5:36 pm UTC

Giant Speck wrote:
gorcee wrote:I'm posting from a drive thru line behind some fuckass that ordered 87 things with coupons, so yeah. Go inside if you have that much shit, ffs.

I just went through a drive-thru where someone walked up and started begging for money from each car in line.

Last time I was at a drive-thru, the girl ahead of me rear ended the car that was waiting at the window. Classy.

by **Menacing Spike** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 6:12 pm UTC

Amie wrote:Fuck. *hugs* if you want them.

Who wouldn't want fuckhugs?

by **I Am Raven** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 7:36 pm UTC

Menacing Spike wrote:
Amie wrote:Fuck. *hugs* if you want them.

Who wouldn't want fuckhugs?

I snickered.

by **Amie** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 7:42 pm UTC

I Am Raven wrote:
Menacing Spike wrote:
Amie wrote:Fuck. *hugs* if you want them.

Who wouldn't want fuckhugs?

I snickered.

by **Zarq** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 9:54 pm UTC

I tried finding clever but non-offending examples of people who would not want fuckhugs. I failed.

by **Kewangji** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 10:43 pm UTC

The Anti-Fuckhug Association

by **Kewangji** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 10:44 pm UTC

oh, you said 'clever'

by **Magnanimous** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 10:53 pm UTC

The people who invented the Christian Side Hug might object.

by **Xeio** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 12:11 am UTC

Wait wait wait. Christian Side Hugs are a thing?

And... the wikipedia page...

however (as seen on the photo) there is still an risk/threat of the 'breast - to - armpit' touch/engagement that could trigger the mentioned temptation

O.o

by **e^iπ+1=0** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 1:22 am UTC

Which was added by some random IP who also added, before it was removed, "Christian side hug has not gained popularity, and has been practiced mainly by the orthodox Christian conservatives; mainly by those with severe mental and psychological problems."

That article should probably be deleted for not being notable, but for now I'll just remove that bit of the sentence.

by **Steax** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 1:22 am UTC

Breast-to-armpit?

.. Well that's a fetish I never thought of.

by **phlip** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 2:06 am UTC

When you're stuck in a community that comes up with things like the side-hug, you take what fetishes you can get.

by **PhoenixEnigma** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 2:25 am UTC

What scares me most about that is the mindset it comes from - don't tempt us, or we might do something stupid just because we can't control ourselves. That's just a little too close to victim blaming for my comfort.

by **Sytri** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 11:34 am UTC

Whats that? Yes I do have nearly £500 waiting to be approved in expenses! You've still not authorised them after two days? Of course that's fine! It's not like they would be in my account by tomorrow morning if you'd approved them when I'd asked you is it?

Gaaah! I hate having managers be in different countries when I need my money back!

by **dhokarena56** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 11:43 am UTC

I am, as I have been occasionally wont to do, reverting today from the more-or-less normal psychological state of the last six months or so to my psychological state of the nine months or so that, that being extremely insecure and depressed lovesickness for a woman I cannot and never shall be able to date.

What's strange about it is that there's something content about this state of affairs. I'm not happy, it seems, unless I'm romantically miserable. I grabbed the cat and am typing with him on my lap because I needed someone to cuddle on.

by **TimelordSimone** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 12:32 pm UTC

Sytri wrote:It's a sports kit! Stop bloody complaining! Not enough red? Red makes you somehow run faster, longer, throw further and cycle better does it? No? Then stop moaning! Are you going to be wearing this kit for your own olympic performance this summer? No? Than stop complaining! If the real athletes like it and the kit does help, then it will be down to the fabrics used, where they are used and how. Colour is inconsequential apart from how it will make the participants wearing the outfits feel emotionally. And apparently they think it looks great and as a by-product of that they feel they can perform to their best abilities. So fuck off and stop taking up valuable comments board space with your inane chatter.

And breathe.

I really should stop reading BBC comments.

The thing that really amuses me about this is that this is the one that keeps getting used to illustrate it.

Spoiler:

You'd think if you were going to complain about how it's 'all blue' or whatever, you'd use one of the mostly blue kits to illustrate your point, not the one that is pretty evenly red/white/blue.

by **roband** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 12:47 pm UTC

Wow, they photoshopped Jessica Ennis a lot...

by **emceng** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 1:36 pm UTC

Xeio wrote:Wait wait wait. Christian Side Hugs are a thing?

And... the wikipedia page...
however (as seen on the photo) there is still an risk/threat of the 'breast - to - armpit' touch/engagement that could trigger the mentioned temptation
O.o

I'm confused on a number of levels. 1) umm, people have been doing side hugs for a long time. It's called standing next to someone. 2) What the fuck is wrong with people that they really thought about, and then proceeded to say, 'don't hug people, it leads to temptation'?

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