morning psychosis

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markiiu
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby markiiu » Sat May 09, 2009 1:10 am UTC

I occasionally fall victim to this: once when I was on pain meds and thought someone had stolen my door (I had fallen off the end of the bed and started trying to open the wall), and also when I wake up to my alarm clock and swear that I can stretch time for myself, as long as I never leave my bed. Also, I once had a late dream/wake up mix thing where I heard my alarm clock, but thought it was a man in a panda suit yelling gibberish that sounded like my clock.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby negatron » Sat May 09, 2009 2:22 am UTC

markiiu wrote: I wake up to my alarm clock and swear that I can stretch time for myself

This one is surprisingly common. "I thought time had stopped" was my #1 excuse for being late in class. I wonder if all those detentions would have been served had they known I wasn't lying.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby LuNatic » Sat May 09, 2009 3:08 am UTC

From the 'it made sense at the time' thread:

LuNatic wrote:A couple of years back I was staying at my Aunt and Uncles house for a weekend. Sunday afternoon I was really tired, so I crashed for a nap. When I woke up, the clock said 7:00, and for some reason my half asleep brain interpreted this as 7:00am, so I wandered into the kitchen (not realising it was dark, or that I was already dressed) and starting making myself breakfast. Soon after, my Aunt wandered in to start cooking dinner, and asked me what I was doing. Thankfully, her laughter at my reply was enough to wake me up the rest of the way and bring me to my senses. Talk about embarrassing...
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Mous » Sat May 09, 2009 3:10 am UTC

That happens to me when I get sick. I'll fall asleep in the daytime, then wake up around 6 and think it's 6 in the morning and be like "fuck, I have to go to school..." then get all ready to go to school.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Sasha » Sat May 09, 2009 3:26 am UTC

Marbas wrote:As for morning psychosis, I find I have very strange thought processes on waking and for a while afterwords. I'll usually jump from one strange thought to the next, such gems as: "I wonder if bears get depressed", "I think the sun is unnecessarily smug" and so on.

SIGGED.
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Marbas wrote:I'll usually jump from one strange thought to the next, such gems as: "I wonder if bears get depressed", "I think the sun is unnecessarily smug" and so on.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby GraphiteGirl » Sat May 09, 2009 8:08 am UTC

My mum used to tell me stories before bed when I was younger, but by the time she convinced me to go to sleep she was pretty exhausted herself - she'd start to drift off in the middle of a sentence. Once I woke her up, and she came out with, "Um, and so the pink elephant said to the teapot, um, that..." and went back to sleep. (This wasn't even tangentially related to the story.) Now, whenever either of us has tired-brain-disconnect, we say we're having a teapot moment.
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aging.child
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby aging.child » Sat May 09, 2009 5:12 pm UTC

Jahan wrote:I have noticed that if I am awoken from a deep sleep, I often have a hard time becoming "fully" conscious and end up talking complete and utter bollocks. My brain says "good morning" thing but my mouth says "glarblahgetoutofmyroomaghhhhh!jet pack assassins are after me!what..what...what are you. No. I don't wan...why are you gr*zzzzzzzzzz*"
Oh yeah, one time I woke up in the middle of the night because I had to use the bathroom. So I wandered into the kitchen and kind of stood there staring at my mom thinking "this isn't right." I tried sooo hard to say "I'm sorry, I meant to go to the bathroom" but it just wouldn't come out. After some awkward staring, I just blurted out "...bye!" and left.

My older brother used to have an issue with night time bathroom trips too. One time when he was about seven or eight he accidently peed on my other older brother (who was three or four at the time) because he thought he was in the bathroom. Which makes me paranoid that I'm going to go to the bathroom somewhere inappropriate...
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Hawknc » Sat May 09, 2009 5:31 pm UTC

I've just been informed of a time when I got up in the middle of the night to check on our newborn mice and was stopped by my wife who wanted to know why I was taking the cat (who has spent its entire life inside) outside. (Apparently it needed the bathroom. Neither my friend Catherine nor my wife were too impressed with this.)

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby pooteeweet » Sat May 09, 2009 9:24 pm UTC

Once I woke up in the middle of the night suddenly needing to puke. I stumbled towards where I thought my bedroom door was, and vomited in the corner before I could figure out why there was no doorway there.

More recently, I woke my boyfriend up for a bit of fun. Afterwards he told me that he'd still been mostly-asleep during the early foreplay; and that during this he was dreaming that my pussy was an inter-dimensional portal of some sort. And his penis was a spaceship.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Waldo » Sun May 10, 2009 5:17 am UTC

I say the stupidest things when I'm half-awake. Damned if I can remember them.

Every once in a while, when I have to get out of bed on time for something, I'll partially wake up, realise I need to get out of bed on time, and check my watch. Most of the time, though, I'll actually only dream I'm checking my watch, and it always says that it's the middle of the night, so I go back to sleep. That one's made me late a few times.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby smw543 » Sun May 10, 2009 5:32 am UTC

Inverse: When I'm awoken by someone (usually a knock on the door or a phone call) I seem totally coherent to them, despite the fact that I'm pretty much still asleep. In fact, it has been pointed out to me how creepy it is; I will sometimes sit up zombie-like at a 45 degree angle, mostly only by using my abdominal muscles, with one eye half open and the other 1/4 open, yet I am fully articulate and make complete sense. (Though I will occasionally speak in a Scottish accent, which is odd considering I don't personally know anyone with a Scottish accent.)

I will often forget these conversations, but remember the information from them (such as a reminder to meet someone, etc.)
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Beacons! » Sun May 10, 2009 1:27 pm UTC

"Does China have chickens? 'Cause America has chickens, and Asia has chickens, but does China have chickens?"
Apparently my brain discards all geography when I first wake up.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby happy-go-lucky » Sun May 10, 2009 8:13 pm UTC

I normally wake up straight away when my alarm goes off, but I have on occasion just incorporated it into my dream. It gets progressively louder, but I have slept right through it once or twice. This is an alarm that has woken me up from the other side of the house when I'm sleeping more lightly, and when I slept through it it was under my pillow.

Also I kind of remember when I was very young and just learning not to wet the bed I would occasionally realise I needed the toilet while still asleep then half dream that I got up and went through to the bathroom, only to wake up with soggy pyjamas mid pee. :lol:
Better than my brother though, he still wet the bed occasionally at the age of 14.

I often dream that people are speaking to me in a different language. Obviously the language is made up because the only language I speak to any reasonable degree apart from English is Spanish, which I would recognise. Quite often I can also speak the crazy made up language too.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Dezign » Mon May 11, 2009 5:52 pm UTC

I can't recall ever having speech intention problems in the morning. However, I never feel completely awake until I've been away from a bed for a good sixteen hours -- and the first thirty minutes of every day are covered in invisible, yet gray, cotton fuzz, which does affect how I end up sounding.

The biggest problem I have upon first breaking the cover of darkness is not wanting to get out of bed. Every second I spend lying down is dominated by the desire to go back to sleep (with the rare exception of those weekends when I'm allowed to toggle between these states for 12+ hours). When I actually convince myself to stand up it's as though that part of my brain was once again replaced by the me that hates sleeping. ... I'm keeping a watch on my sleep-self so that it doesn't do anything rash like break an alarm clock. Also, alarm clock resistance is a medical problem.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby PictureSarah » Mon May 11, 2009 6:00 pm UTC

I wake up pretty gracefully, but getting to sleep is a whole different thing. I am usually still mentally awake when I'm already physically asleep, which leads me to turn to my fiance and say things like "We need to eat more cruciferous vegetables." Unfortunately, my face is asleep, so what he hears is "Uuuuuunnnnnnnhhh."
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby SecondTalon » Mon May 11, 2009 6:11 pm UTC

Ah, one thing that I'm apparently capable of doing - Holding 15-20 minute conversations while still asleep.

And sounding perfectly awake and coherent.


Now, maybe I did actually wake up and maybe I was actually coherent. The issue is that I have no memory of said conversations.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Kyberely » Mon May 11, 2009 8:25 pm UTC

Quite a lot of the time I wake up thinking that my alarm clock is a fire alarm going off. The worrying thing is that this doesn't seem to bother me in the slightest, I just turn it off and go back to sleep. A couple of times I have woken up early thought it was a lot later and woken everybody in the house up in a panic as I thought that we had 15 minutes to get ready and go out. I've also woken up and thought that it was a good to start singing which came out as a feeble lala-ing.

Also I was sleeping over at a friends house and her dad walked in, in the middle of the night. I rose so I was sitting up, pointing and circling my finger at him whilst chanting. He thought that I was putting a voodoo curse on him.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Whelan » Mon May 11, 2009 9:01 pm UTC

My best psychosis was actually quite fun, I have a bit of a tendency to wake up and only look at the minute hand of the clock, this led me to believe it was half past 8, a good quarter hour after I'm meant to leave for school, so I rushed my arse off to try and not be late, It was only when I arrived at school to see an empty bike shed, and the caretaker hoisting the flag that I realised It was half 7, not 8 and I was a whole hour early to school.
Best bit was, that if it had been half 8 when I left, I would've made it in on time.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Kyberely » Mon May 11, 2009 9:16 pm UTC

At least if you do that you get a lie in (even if it is followed by a panic). I've been doing it for about two months.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Mous » Tue May 12, 2009 1:14 am UTC

Just now I was sleeping, and my friend called me on the phone, and I started telling him about how Obama had a nightmare and was telling his wife about it, except that's not possible because birds don't have nightmares.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby benjhuey » Tue May 12, 2009 1:26 am UTC

I slept very little last night, so during my shower this morning, there was a point at which all I could do was stare at the shampoo bottle and wonder what the hell I was supposed to do with it.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Sasha » Tue May 12, 2009 2:05 am UTC

Okay. Commenting time now.
Sometime last night, I started having stomach pains while I was lying on my back, half-asleep. So in my mind, I made the association between sharp, stabbing pains in the stomach and lying on my back: I was having an operation to fit me with bionic arms and the stomach was where they were tunneling through to attach the neural connections.
Marbas wrote:I'll usually jump from one strange thought to the next, such gems as: "I wonder if bears get depressed", "I think the sun is unnecessarily smug" and so on.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Samsoneffect » Tue May 12, 2009 2:14 am UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Ah, one thing that I'm apparently capable of doing - Holding 15-20 minute conversations while still asleep.

And sounding perfectly awake and coherent.


Now, maybe I did actually wake up and maybe I was actually coherent. The issue is that I have no memory of said conversations.


Done this before, except I was helping my then-girlfriend with her physics assignment. Fast asleep on her bed at 3 am.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Internetmeme » Tue May 12, 2009 9:27 pm UTC

Let's see...
At Boy Scout summercamp last year at Woodruff in Georgia, we had two people to a tent (and they were large, about 30-40 square feet), you know, the ones that have the steel frame on top of a permanent base and the ends you have to tie? We had cots.

The following takes place between 5PM and 8PM

I had tied a knot on one end of it where no-one used it (facing the woods) which became commonly named a "James is Paranoid knot". Those things took about 10 minutes to undo with a pointed stick or screwdriver.

The following takes place between 12AM and 5AM

So I have a dream where I think I'm coming back into the tent after getting some water, and the door has a "James is Paranoid knot" tied. I wake up sitting up in my sleeping bag, thinking that I'm still outside. On the end next to the woods, where I tied my knots, I'm scratching at the flaps and saying "Grant, open the door!". He wakes up but is still groggy, so I say "Grant, turned the dang light on!", thinking it would wake him up. He turns the light on, and the instant he does, I have a "Holy Crap" moment. I realize that I'm sitting up scratching at the flaps. I went back to sleep.

Maybe it had something to do with my dehydration/heat exhaustion/overheating the previous day.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby AnnaArmour » Tue May 12, 2009 10:33 pm UTC

This isn't as charming as some of the other stories here... My mother recently tried to wake me by shaking my shoulder, and I reacted by briefly thrashing about and jerking back by elbow towards her. I'd never try to hit my mother, it just seemed like a good idea when I woke up to apply my nonexistent self defense training to the situation. I consider attacking people pretty often*, but I never do. It kind of bothers me that I didn't have the common sense when I woke up to not act on what I usually just think about.

*Disclaimer: I'm not a really violent type of person. I just mean this in a figurative "I feel like punching x in the face" kind of way.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Internetmeme » Tue May 12, 2009 10:48 pm UTC

Well, the logic part of your brain shuts down for the most part until you wake up, and even then, it still takes a few minutes to actually completely "Boot up". (or at least for me)
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby nightlina » Wed May 13, 2009 4:14 am UTC

I'll occasionally have this weird thing happen where I confuse reality with my dreams.

Once I was having a dream that a dog or something was eating my shoulder. This didn't really worry me at all. Until I woke up and felt something on my shoulder and started screaming at the top of my lungs. My boy (who was lying on my shoulder, funnily enough :P) woke up and also started yelling. It probably took the both of us about a minute to stop screaming and then he had to do lots of 'calm down liney' things to settle me again ><

Another time I woke up and was convinced that my boyfriend was a giant-tape-worm-looking-monster spam filter that was blocking me from sending emails to him. I didn't scream, but I lay there completely terrified until I fell back to sleep ><

I've also had the waking up and thinking you're surrounded by 1000s of spiders. Oh, and once when I woke up needing to go to the toilet but couldn't because there were crocodiles all over the floor. And the intercom (we had no intercom... I just invented that. Along with the crocodiles...) between my room and my parents was broken and sparking so I was trapped! I can't remember if I devised a method for escape or just wet the bed... probably the latter :P
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby ParanoidAndroid » Wed May 13, 2009 4:45 am UTC

This morning, I awoke to a throbbing pain in my mouth from my stitched-up gums. I sat there for about 30 minutes thinking, "Why does my mouth hurt, and why can't I do anything about it?" before remembering my surgery and pain medication. Also, if my sleepy brain thinks that whoever is waking me up is messing with me, I get very angry and sometimes aggressive.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Chfan » Wed May 13, 2009 10:27 am UTC

I once woke up to a massive- hornet next to my bed. Like, bigger than my head.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby mickyj300x » Wed May 13, 2009 10:41 am UTC

I've had this happen to me before. It usually occurs if my Deep sleep or REM phase get's broken just enough so that I'm not fully awake.
For an example of this, I was sleeping on the top of a bunk, and one of my friends had to go do a paper run. I was then convinced that he was a wind demon attacking the bed (It was gale force outside) and that if I stayed dead still, It'd go away.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby SlyReaper » Wed May 13, 2009 11:15 am UTC

This morning, I was dreaming about escaping from some prison or other. There was a loud alarm, and I assumed I'd been discovered. Turns out it was my alarm clock.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Ptolom » Wed May 13, 2009 6:04 pm UTC

This morning I just let my alarm ring for about 15 minutes until it passed it's time. Didn't even want to touch that thing.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Waldo » Wed May 13, 2009 6:25 pm UTC

This morning I was oddly convinced that the garbage truck was a pair of F-14s coming to bomb my house. Then I realized that no, it was more likely a pair of F-15s. Then I realized that no, it was the garbage truck. Which for some reason was the most alarming choice of the three.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby sq_ocelot » Thu May 14, 2009 2:18 am UTC

The other night I had a dream that I was trying to fall asleep (not in my bedroom, in a different room in the house), but my radio was being really loud, and I couldn't figure out how to turn it off. Finally, I did, but then another radio started going off, and I had to again hunt for the button that would silence it. Then, I fell asleep.

Turns out, that was my alarm going off, and I ended up waking up late for having slept through my alarm.

And once, a while ago, I had a dream that I was in my grandma's house, and I was using the bathroom. There was apparently a radio built into the toilet, and it was really loud and annoying, and I could not figure out how to turn it off. Once again, it was actually my alarm, and I woke up late.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby SlyReaper » Thu May 14, 2009 8:47 am UTC

Once, when I got a bit drunk, I fell asleep in front of my desk at home. I woke up some time later and my clock said 9 o clock. I panicked. I was late for lectures. I hadn't even changed clothes, showered, had breakfast, and for some reason I still felt a bit drunk.

I got my bag packed, changed my clothes, sprayed on lavish amounts of deo, and hurried out my front door.

The sky was dark. How odd.

I checked my watch again. It was 9:30 PM.

I went back to bed, muttering.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Themata » Thu May 14, 2009 1:24 pm UTC

The other day I slept REALLY well, after only sleeping for 2-3 hours the night before. When my dad awoke me from my sleep so I could be ready for school, he asked me how I slept. My response was something along the lines of...
"I wishahfaf fsuurrggggggh"

"What?"

"I... wish I could count it in winks...." with some silly smile on my face. My father obviously thought I was crazy. The funny thing is I remember my head thinking I was making a very clever joke, and then immediately falling asleep smugly afterwards, until woken again 5 minutes later.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby BMW787 » Thu May 14, 2009 2:55 pm UTC

benjhuey wrote:I slept very little last night, so during my shower this morning, there was a point at which all I could do was stare at the shampoo bottle and wonder what the hell I was supposed to do with it.


That is exactly why I started to take showers before I went to bed. After a few 40 minute showers of me mixing up the sampoo with the bodywash and face wash I decided I needed to be more awake. And then sometimes I would forget to rinse after soaping up. :D
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby benjhuey » Sat May 23, 2009 7:55 pm UTC

This morning, I woke up and noticed my car was gone. Turns out my father had taken my keys and just moved it. Apparently, I gave him my consent to do so.
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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Ninjew » Sun May 24, 2009 12:32 am UTC

This happened at college in the dorms. Just going to say that there is normally a train that goes by, and is usually very loud when you are outside.

So I'm sleeping, and it's probably around 10 o'clock. I'm dreaming about something, when I start to dream about trains, oddly enough. I then wake up, start yelling at the train "Why are you outside my window, train? Trains shouldn't be outside my window!" Later, I was told that there were three tornado watches that morning, and that was the third one. I slept through the other two, and woke up to the "train" outside my window.

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Re: morning psychosis

Postby Voco » Sun May 24, 2009 2:16 am UTC

I often feel an intense sense of duty to complete the tasks, however absurd, in my dreams. Such that waking up, even when I realize I'm waking up, I feel like I'm abandoning everyone and everything that matters. It stays with me all morning, this odd guilt about not completing my dream task. Especially if it's a relationship-type thing where I didn't have time to set things right with the dream character before I awoke.


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