I don't feel shame as much as anger. I hate that I am expected to act a certain way because of what's between my legs. I don't care about sports. At all. Seriously, don't talk to me about sports, because you will lose me very quickly. People think I'm a quiet person, because they don't hear me talk much. Those who know to get me talking about politics or technology know this is not true. I will talk your ear off. But most men, or at least those in my family, or on my floor here in the dorm, seem to have nothing else to talk about besides sports.
Am I sexually attracted to women? Yes. Men too, but that's a whole different topic. Do I want to discuss the relative attractiveness of different celebrities? No. Will I watch something simply because it has an attractive woman in it? No. Do I think it makes you seem positively simian to have nearly naked women as your desktop background, or on posters on your wall? Absolutely.
And yes, I know how to change a tire. But I'd rather just call AAA. That's why we pay for it, isn't it? Yeah, it's a good skill to have, just in case. But it's just as important for my sister to know that as it is for me. Perhaps more so. And yet, my father never did teach her. Part of that is because he's a bit, er, traditional, but mostly it's because my sister learned long ago that she can abuse her gender to get out of doing things. Mowing the lawn is not exactly a technically challenging thing, but my brother and I still did it far more than she did. Which reminds me, I need to go walk all the way across campus to my sister's apartment, so that I can check the oil and tire pressure in the car we share before we drive home for break. Because obviously, my sister couldn't possibly do it.
But as much as I dislike that particular tactic of my sister, I really have her to thank for my dislike, both of that tactic and of my supposed assigned role. She helped me realize that being called a woman isn't an insult, and that there is no reason I can't be my own person. It's okay for me to dislike things, even if people think I must like them. And if someone wants to call me a name because I don't participate in something I don't agree with, I can and should take such as a compliment. If I don't like your morality, and you're telling me I don't conform to it, how can I take offense?