Gender Confirmation

Things that don't belong anywhere else. (Check first).

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MFHodge
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Postby MFHodge » Sun Jul 08, 2007 8:09 pm UTC

gmalivuk wrote:If size was all that mattered, more women would fuck horses.

Thanks, I needed a new one.
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Postby Swordfish » Sun Jul 08, 2007 8:25 pm UTC

Here's a one I finally though of.

Playing hockey and purposefully putting my head in the way of the puck/ball to stop it. Nothing makes me feel more like a man than putting my well being on the line in order to help the people on my team... in, what really is an insignificant game anyway.
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Postby gmalivuk » Sun Jul 08, 2007 8:52 pm UTC

VTHodge wrote:
gmalivuk wrote:If size was all that mattered, more women would fuck horses.

Thanks, I needed a new one.


Happy to help.

Peshmerga wrote:Assuming the correct average is about 5.5", you better be grateful to get anything near that.


What, like she should be thankful that someone as well-endowed as yourself deigned to fuck her? Give me a fucking break. No one need ever feel "grateful" for a partner's goddamn anatomy. If I'm with a woman who occasionally wants something bigger, I'm secure enough not to be intimidated by any toys she wants to use to enhance our sex.

If anyone should be grateful, it's you. For any woman willing to put up with such an obvious self-absorbed asshole.

semicolon wrote:Am I the only one who isn't repulsed by the idea of a prostate exam? I mean, I've had an unlubed finger in my bum before. It's not bad. And if the guy's doing it to make sure I don't have, you know, cancer, I don't think I would mind a little disconfort.


A finger up there can feel damn good, since physiologically milking the prostate isn't all that different from stimulating the G-spot. But just like fingers up the vagina are different during sex and a gyno exam, I would imagine one up the ass is pretty damn different during a visit to the butt-doctor.
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Postby SecondTalon » Sun Jul 08, 2007 8:56 pm UTC

Most statistics I've read say that women, on average, don't really like long penises. Too much "OW FUCK MY CERVIX!!" going on.


Also, if I have to chose between a trained medical professional shoving a finger in my ass .. what is it, once, twice a year... or a long, painful death of cancer...

Gee, tough call.
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the human perl script
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Postby the human perl script » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:03 pm UTC

When playing badass sports in high temperatures, getting to remove outer layers of clothing, even playing topless, just to keep the sun from affecting the level of badassery.
Women don't get to do that, and I think it's a shame, but then that's the price they pay for willfully using clothes to sexualise their breasts.

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Postby Swordfish » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:08 pm UTC

the human perl script wrote:When playing badass sports in high temperatures, getting to remove outer layers of clothing, even playing topless, just to keep the sun from affecting the level of badassery.
Women don't get to do that, and I think it's a shame, but then that's the price they pay for willfully using clothes to sexualise their breasts.


I would imagine that playing a sport without at least some sort of bra on would be rather uncomfortable for a woman.
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Postby Vandole » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:17 pm UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Most statistics I've read say that women, on average, don't really like long penises. Too much "OW FUCK MY CERVIX!!" going on.

From what I've read, the only preferences for bigger penes come from more clitoris rubbing during vaginal intercourse and they (supposedly) more reliably hit the g-spot. Both of which are achievable with a smaller penis and the right position, so I've been told.

But it seems when it comes to orgasms the ladies get shafted. (I totally didn't realize the double entend here until later)
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Postby parkaboy » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:19 pm UTC

Swordfish wrote:
the human perl script wrote:When playing badass sports in high temperatures, getting to remove outer layers of clothing, even playing topless, just to keep the sun from affecting the level of badassery.
Women don't get to do that, and I think it's a shame, but then that's the price they pay for willfully using clothes to sexualise their breasts.


I would imagine that playing a sport without at least some sort of bra on would be rather uncomfortable for a woman.


depends on the girl. for me, probably. for... oh.. milla jojovich (just as an example) maybe not so much.
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SecondTalon
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Postby SecondTalon » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:22 pm UTC

From what I've read, the only preferences for bigger penes come from more clitoris rubbing during vaginal intercourse and they (supposedly) more reliably hit the g-spot. Both of which are achievable with a smaller penis and the right position, so I've been told.


I didn't say bigger, I said longer. But even then, if it's too girthy, it will also cause a lot of discomfort.

See also: The "Like a Virgin" conversation from Reservoir Dogs

depends on the girl. for me, probably. for... oh.. milla jojovich (just as an example) maybe not so much.


That's pretty much one of the argument as to why there are so few large-breasted athletes. Too much moving around, no elastic strong enough to control it, lots of pain/smacking yourself in the face.
Last edited by SecondTalon on Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:24 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Invisible Queen
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Postby Invisible Queen » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:23 pm UTC

Let's hear three cheers for small boobs!
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Postby Hammer » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:24 pm UTC

SecondTalon wrote:See also: The "Like a Virgin" conversation from Reservoir Dogs

Please, in the name of all that's holy, DO NOT take sexual advice from Quentin Tarantino.
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SecondTalon
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Postby SecondTalon » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:24 pm UTC

Invisible Queen wrote:Let's hear three cheers for boobs!


Fixed it for you. Boobs are awesome, regardless of size.

Hammer wrote:
SecondTalon wrote:See also: The "Like a Virgin" conversation from Reservoir Dogs

Please, in the name of all that's holy, DO NOT take sexual advice from Quentin Tarantino.


Awww... alright, George Romero it is, then!
heuristically_alone wrote:I want to write a DnD campaign and play it by myself and DM it myself.
heuristically_alone wrote:I have been informed that this is called writing a book.

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Invisible Queen
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Postby Invisible Queen » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:28 pm UTC

Sure, but it's assumed boobs are awesome. Small boobs deserve some special attention. IMO.
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Postby Jesse » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:29 pm UTC

Invisible Queen wrote:Sure, but it's assumed boobs are awesome. Small boobs deserve some special attention. IMO.


I am actually going to agree on that one. Mostly I date woen with small breasts, not through any design, it just seems to be a common factor of the majority of my girlfriends.

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Trevor
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Postby Trevor » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:30 pm UTC

Vandole wrote:But it seems when it comes to orgasms the ladies get shafted.


Gotta love those orgasms.
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Postby UmbrageOfSnow » Sun Jul 08, 2007 10:52 pm UTC

I'd say I feel most manly when doing something unnecessary and completely overkill with my friends especially when explosives/fire/power tools are involved. Fourth of July celebrations are great for this.
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Postby SpitValve » Sun Jul 08, 2007 11:08 pm UTC

Back on topic, and out of the gutter:

VTHodge wrote:Fixing the ice maker.

Fuck no, we are not calling a repair man!


I fixed a laminator in Thailand. And I used Tools. I definitely got man-points for that.

Also, running up and down ladders setting up lighting and lifting big speakers and stuff for a ball a few weeks ago. It helped that I was the only man in the room.

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Postby Castaway » Sun Jul 08, 2007 11:52 pm UTC

Carrying ladies. It always wins.
You've just lost twenty dollars and my self respect.

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Postby hotaru » Mon Jul 09, 2007 12:57 am UTC

Thunderbird4! wrote:
Klye wrote:Girl: <crying>Oh me yarm you're bleeding!!!1</crying>
Me: Where?

I'm in this boat too, though my response is usually to look at the cut, go Oh... and keep doing whatever I was doing. The manliness feeling increases exponentially as they continue to worry about me.


it doesn't help so much when she gets 4 of her (female) friends and has them hold you down while she bandages the cut, tho... that actually happened to me once at a concert...

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Postby Castaway » Mon Jul 09, 2007 1:04 am UTC

Swearing at people in public. Not like strangers, but if someone is just making things difficult for me(like at the Post Office), or if somebody almost hits me with their car when I have the right of way, I will yell at them, and it makes me feel manly.
You've just lost twenty dollars and my self respect.



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Hammer
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Postby Hammer » Mon Jul 09, 2007 1:13 am UTC

I've been thinking on this. As it turns out, there's nothing I do that makes me feel more womanly. There are things that make me feel graceful or glamorous or competent or loyal or the reverse of any of those, but I always feel like a woman. I just feel like a graceful woman or whatever. I can put on a plaid shirt and boots and a toolbelt and run wire all day. I still feel feminine.
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Postby wocket » Mon Jul 09, 2007 2:23 am UTC

Putting on my Brown Dress of Awesome Sexiness, along with the Brown Leather Boots To Match.

Using my puppy dog eyes on a man and actually having them work.

Getting Shark Week (not womanly in a good way, but definitely womanly).

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Birdman
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Postby Birdman » Mon Jul 09, 2007 4:05 am UTC

I feel more blokey after taking one of these;

Image

off one of these;

Image

and putting a new one back on, all in the same shift. Man, them's some big spanners (or spandoolies, if I'm not feeling quite so blokey).
Last edited by Birdman on Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:20 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Postby Swordfish » Mon Jul 09, 2007 4:17 am UTC

Birdman wins for his 747 repair.

apocralypse wrote:depends on the girl. for me, probably. for... oh.. milla jojovich (just as an example) maybe not so much.


That's the second time today I've heard a comment about her diminutive breasts.
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Postby parkaboy » Mon Jul 09, 2007 4:18 am UTC

she just came to mind b/c i watched resident evil 2 the other day. and there is definate proof of a card carrying member of the ibt club.

despite that she is DAMN hot. i didnt mean for it to be used as a negative example, just an example.
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Postby EradicateIV » Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:01 am UTC

gmalivuk wrote:If anyone should be grateful, it's you. For any woman willing to put up with such an obvious self-absorbed asshole.


Quoted for truth.

I'd have to say that twisting caps for other people on a daily basis is a great gender confirmation.



So what if I think small? :-/
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Postby Pebbles » Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:44 am UTC

I'm with Hammer on this one. I always feel like a girl/woman.. sometimes I'm aware of it in different ways though. Periods make me feel like being female is the worst thing in the world.. however being able to complain about periods makes me feel superior to males (crazy, yes I know). I bought some ballet slippers the other day, the kind I wore as a kid when we did dancing.. and wearing them I feel like a little girl haha they make me wanna dance. But at the same time I can be wearing a guys tshirt (yeah I wear them loose and comfy) and be very aware of how awesome my chest looks in them. So yeah, no matter what I feel girly.
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Postby Pixel » Mon Jul 09, 2007 4:57 pm UTC

Alisto wrote:
lukkucairi wrote:I feel most womanly when PMS inflates my boobs to an unfeasible size and makes me want to rip the heads off a six pack of orphaned kittens.


I would like to hear more about this boob inflation, thanks.


I would like to hear more about this kitten decapitation, thanks. :twisted:


I probably feel most "manly" when I'm in the garage, covered in grease, working on one of my cars.

This reminds me of something I said during a conversation on guys using their cars as compensation for certain "shortcomings".

"I'm not saying there is anything to the compensation thing, but both my classic cars are underpowered economy cars, and my daily driver is a dented station wagon."


It got a laugh anyway.
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Postby darry » Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:06 pm UTC

building a fire - every time!
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Postby Cuton » Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:31 pm UTC

I think I feel the most manly when I upstage either a random guy or one of my friends when they are trying to do something "manly" and fail miserably, only to have me drop in and do it effortlessly. As an example: A group of friends (2 guys, their girlfriends and me) were taking a hike in the woods, we were off trail and had been for a good 1 1/2 -2 hours, girls were starting to complain about being lost so the guys are like OK we go this way, I said no, you're wrong. But 2v1 means we went their way. Half hour later, I get us turned around, walk 10 minutes, right back to the path and to our tents within another 5. I think my smirk could have been seen from across the ocean.

Cuton

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Postby Peshmerga » Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:45 pm UTC

Haha, oh the irony of men defending women in a gender confirmation thread.

Radical failure.

I feel the most manly after working out.
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Narsil
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Postby Narsil » Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:49 pm UTC

Is this before or after your mom brings you the apple juice?

Confession: Demeaning other guys makes me feel pretty manly. Yeah that makes me a bad person.
Last edited by Narsil on Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:52 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
Spoiler:
EsotericWombat wrote:MORE JUNK THAN YOUR BODY HAS ROOM FOR

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Oh... that.

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Postby sarahnade » Mon Jul 09, 2007 5:50 pm UTC

So I was thinking "Man, why aren't there more girls responding?" Then I realized: web comic + sciencey/mathy themes + forum != female fan base

:guy moments:
roofing
singing alto II
all my classes (comp sci major)
someone is crying ("uhh... wanna hug? how about a joke?")

:girl moments:
baking
getting gussied up
flirting
watching a chick flick
Image

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Insignificant Deifaction
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Postby Insignificant Deifaction » Mon Jul 09, 2007 6:25 pm UTC

Yes, I don't ever not feel female, but different things put different lenses on my reality glasses.

By the way Sarahnade. We've got like 4-5 females responding including me ^_^. Maybe more O_o
ID...
Sn...
Lani...
Tess...
The Fiddler?
GirlTM...
The one whose usertitle is "has (underage) boobs" (sorry whoever you are)
wocket
Hammer
kilgore trout
I think I'm missing some people.
Last edited by Insignificant Deifaction on Mon Jul 09, 2007 6:33 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
Belial wrote:You are giving me the tools to sodomize my vast imagination, and for this I am grateful.

PM Me, if you care for a chat.

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Postby wocket » Mon Jul 09, 2007 6:26 pm UTC

Yes. You missed me. :(

The point still stands, though, that the males are very much outnumbering us.

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Postby Insignificant Deifaction » Mon Jul 09, 2007 6:27 pm UTC

I was editing the post to add you and hammer when you replied :cry:
Belial wrote:You are giving me the tools to sodomize my vast imagination, and for this I am grateful.

PM Me, if you care for a chat.

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Postby Jesse » Mon Jul 09, 2007 6:35 pm UTC

Elbowing ginger people in the face.

(Exposition: At training every week I make sure to have a 'shoot' MMA fight with my (ginger) friend Jack. He wins nearly every week, due to having about five years more experience than me. But yesterday I managed to use my weight to pin him down and got to elbow him in the face a good few times.)

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Postby Sprocket » Mon Jul 09, 2007 8:56 pm UTC

Memnoch wrote:I feel like a man when I can stare at myself in the mirror, dirty, ugly, with a crapload of hair covering the flab of my stomach and truly think that I look like a sexy man.
but you believe a lie.
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Postby Phenriz » Mon Jul 09, 2007 9:14 pm UTC

CatProximity wrote:
Memnoch wrote:I feel like a man when I can stare at myself in the mirror, dirty, ugly, with a crapload of hair covering the flab of my stomach and truly think that I look like a sexy man.
but you believe a lie.


don't listen to her.

My hairy chest is an affirmation of my gender.

oh, the mess i leave in my living room, and the fact that i sometimes leave things in my fridge/cabinets for up to a year are also confirmations of my gender/bachelorhood.

Bolts for my toilet seat? Didn't have any for about 8 months, why? Because i stand up to urinate. (on the rare occasion i needed to sit down, i had to be careful not to move else i should fall into the screaming abyss that is my toilet bowl)

Oh and i leave my shaving mess on my bathroom sink for like a week before i get around to cleaning it up. Weekends are usually the only time women come over, what can i say i'm a slob.


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Postby Bakemaster » Mon Jul 09, 2007 9:47 pm UTC

Testosterpwn?
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