[SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Sat Jul 24, 2010 7:11 pm UTC

martial arts
/me is biased too

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Sun Jul 25, 2010 1:00 am UTC

martial arts.
/not biased
but seriously, it is more useful, better exercise, and you could use your grace and muscle strength from it to do better at belly dancing later, where as you it won't be as helpful the other way around. but also, as a person do you have more of a need to feel strong or sexy? if you have lots of confidence and discipline socially but are shy in the bed room, you may want to consider belly dancing more. on the other hand if you are confident in your looks but shy and timid socially, you may want to take martial arts.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Sun Jul 25, 2010 2:00 am UTC

Actually, that advice from cait sounds awesome. I'll second that motion. Although I do think martial arts helps the self confidence by leaps and bounds which would then help inadvertently where the belly dancing may.

I should see if my friend who took belly dancing through the community ed program here wants to again and do it with her. I'd me more inclined to try it with a friend, I think. Maybe see which a friend would like doing? When getting into new things I tend to enjoy having a friend with me. When I started in karate I did it with my brother and my best friend and his best friend (who, funnily enough, were brother/sister as well). I never would have tried it otherwise and now I love it.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby meatyochre » Sun Jul 25, 2010 7:27 am UTC

I started martial arts (tae kwon do) as part of a club sport in college, finished 1.5 semesters of it. I was pretty far out of shape (plus I don't have very good knees) and I think I'd have been better off doing lower-impact bellydancing. TKD at least was a lot of running and high-energy kicks and stuff. So bellydancing is what I would choose, but if I had the strength/stam to do MA then I would prefer that.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Sun Jul 25, 2010 1:49 pm UTC

There are more styles of karate than there are of Heintz Ketchup or Baskin Robin ice cream flavors. And TKD is a very high impact one - most people I know in that/who came from that style never did it past their 30's. The style I'm in (Sanchin-Ryu) is awesome as it is designed for any age or ability to be able to effectively do it. Yes, I mean any ability. We have shodans who are handicapped and in wheelchairs even. I actually had the pleasure of working out with one of them...two years ago? (Not everyone lives nearby so a lot of people I only see at events) and let me say - NO WAY would I want to tangle with him on the street. Do his strikes and kicks look the same? Heck no, but they sure are /very/ effective. So yeah. Many many versions of MA out there and they are the entire range of philosophies and impact you can think of!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Chai Kovsky » Sun Jul 25, 2010 2:16 pm UTC

Wow, okay, you kinda sold me. The first time I dislocated my knee was in TKD, so being able to do a martial arts without severely injuring myself would be awesome.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby podbaydoor » Sun Jul 25, 2010 2:20 pm UTC

Martial arts it is, then! Now the issue is picking the right one. And not getting icky flashbacks to awful gym classes in 6th grade when I go to lessons (which is what happened the one and only time I went to a free lesson last spring).

The idea is to acquire more physical grace. I try to run at least 30 minutes most days so I'm not worried about my health. But right now my style of movement is most charitably described as "move from point A to B. the end."
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby crowey » Sun Jul 25, 2010 6:16 pm UTC

if it's grace you want pod, look in to tai chi. it's all about the grace and movement, it's somewhat limited in practical application (compared to the more high impact martial arts) but it's by far the most graceful. If you want a bit more application, there's some lovely styles of kung fu that are almost dances, but also teach you to kick ass.

my own MA history is all about the high impact, hard fighting and competition. I did TKD for 5 years and ranked 3rd in the UK, then moved on to longfist and shaolin kung fu, ju jitsu, kali and MMA. I have had a lot of bruises and injuries, but on the plus side I know I can destroy someone should to occasion arise (hopefully not).


On an unrelated note: woe! I got sunburned today in a top with a rather distinctive neckline. The burning is bad and it will leave a tan line that will last all summer :|

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby podbaydoor » Sun Jul 25, 2010 11:34 pm UTC

:shock: I would dearly love to see you in action. I have a few martial arts friends around here and it's always a fresh surprise when I watch them practice in person - it's very different from when the action is separated from you via movie screen and choreography. Also, they're all male, so seeing a woman express all that coiled power and discipline - excuse the poetry - would be pretty kick ass.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Mon Jul 26, 2010 12:32 am UTC

OH!!!!! POD!!!!! I FOGOT!!!!! CAPOEIRA!!!!
it's african fighting mixed with brazillian dance moves to create a dance-like fighting style.
this way maybe you get best of both worlds? dance and MA?
i always thought it was cool cause slaves invented it so they could practice fighting but their owners would just brush it off as some sort of traditional dance.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby podbaydoor » Mon Jul 26, 2010 12:34 am UTC

The only capoeira group in Columbia apparently disbanded a while ago - if it still exists, I'm told it's very elusive. :( I would love to at least try it out, though, I'm also told it requires an enormous amount of physical fitness.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Mon Jul 26, 2010 12:57 am UTC

it requires such physical fitness to get good at it, but practicing will get you that. though here, where we have many groups, it may be easier to find one of your ability and work your way up as opposed to joining a club of sorts of people who are already good at it.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Tiglette » Mon Jul 26, 2010 1:13 am UTC

Hello all!
Just found this thread, and want to express my appreciation for everyone giving advice and info!! And sharing their stories! I just read a couple pages at the beginning and end, but already have a few new ideas.
My break-up not that long ago caused me to stop taking birth control pills, but because of you wonderful ladies, I think I'll look into getting an IUD instead of getting on the pill again.
And as for belly dancing, definitely would like to try it, but I think that when I have money, finding a good modern dance class will be my goal so I can get back into dancing after having done so little the past few years.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:00 am UTC

Wow cait, that is awesome. I am looking up classes near here. There looks like there is one near Detroit, which wouldn't be bad I could just stay down there in the evenings that night of the week. They don't seem too expensive either, it was like $60 for a 10-week course is all. And they say that "any age and ability" can learn to do it so it sounds like they work beginner to advanced. I have flexibility but I don't have arm strength worth squat...core strength is ok and leg strength is excellent but this one looks like I need a lot more upper body...which is what I want to work on anyway. Thanks! I'll report back if I start taking classes...this seems awesome for me. And I love the african beats and such in all the videos (I'm a fan of african music in general...Angelique Kidjo is one of my fav singers). So culturally it's very interesting to me too!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby poxic » Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:37 am UTC

A friend decided to try capoeira a couple of years back. She enjoyed the challenge of the physical part, but after some research she fell out of love with the spiritual aspect. Since it's a product of slave culture, there's a lot of emphasis on trickery and deception. The sticking point, for her, was the lack of a "promised land" mythology that said they could stop being tricky and deceptive once they reached their liberation. She just couldn't get down with that.

It sounded a bit silly to me at first -- this is a martial art in the artiest sense, why not enjoy it -- but hey, that's why I love her. She has principles, goddammit, and nothing will buy her off. Ever. She wants that on her tombstone: Could Not Be Bought. I have no doubt that, if her partner outlives her, he will make that happen. Heart them both.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:42 am UTC

Ooh well I will definitely be trying: http://www.themichigancenterforcapoeira ... lcome.html It has the beginners classes in the city nextdoor to me and even better yet - first month is FREE to try it out - so yeah. I'll be trying it out! :D I liked their video on the homepage there, because clearly they have all levels and so I won't feel stupid being a silly beginner who can't do any fancy stuff.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby studyinserendipity » Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:59 am UTC

as per usual, I am late to the conversation and can merely agree with what has been said :) But I'd also like to add that, pod, you should not discount cross-training with belly dancing on your own. I've found many teach-yourself bellydancing books and dvds to be useful and have given me much more confidence about my body and made me more self-aware. This body-awareness lets me 'memorize' where my body needs to be for maximum impact when I do MA. Then I can speed up the moves and it gives me lots of ooomph for my size. At times I've considered giving up the MA to actually take a bellydancing class, but I always decide against it because I think I can learn bellydancing on my own better than training myself at MA (I've already lost a good deal of the jiu jitsu I knew from lack of practice and practice buddies). But dancing I can do in my own apartment on my own time - just pop in a cd and go for it.

In other news: I got the pattern for my wedding dress!!! It's a vintage 1950s dress pattern with a fitted top and knee-length skirt. I can't wait to start shopping for fabrics and putting it together :) And of course now I'm hooked on ideas of making all kinds of clothes for myself. I'm addicted to hobbies, I think.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Tiglette » Mon Jul 26, 2010 3:29 am UTC

your dress sounds lovely!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby PictureSarah » Mon Jul 26, 2010 3:59 am UTC

Hanners, that is SO COOL about your dress! Are you going to sew it yourself? I wish I could sew. I tried a sundress last year and failed miserably. I'm glad I had someone who knew what they were doing making my dress. I'd love to see a picture of your dress pattern. You should check out Etsy for 50s style accessories, if you're interested. They have lots of people who make amazing little birdcage veils and stuff.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby tin » Mon Jul 26, 2010 8:45 am UTC

What Sarah said! Pictures please of the pattern! I dearly, dearly want to learn how to make my own 50's style tea and prom dresses too. My sewing skills are just so ridiculously poor.

Also, the talk of belly dancing gets a thumbs up from me. I did it for a while when I lived in Cardiff and loved it. I found it was not so much of workout, but was great for embracing my sensuality and femininity. Also all those hip swivels and tummy rolls are great for toning your stomach.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby studyinserendipity » Mon Jul 26, 2010 10:03 am UTC

tin wrote:Also, the talk of belly dancing gets a thumbs up from me. I did it for a while when I lived in Cardiff and loved it. I found it was not so much of workout, but was great for embracing my sensuality and femininity. Also all those hip swivels and tummy rolls are great for toning your stomach.
Agreed. The stuff that it does for your posture (if you're a sloucher like me) is WONDERFUL.

A pattern picture!
dress pattern.jpg

I am going to make it myself, with my grandmother's help. She helped me make a prom dress and a few other really wonderful articles of clothing back when I was in high school/college. I got a really nice sewing machine from her as a college graduation present, and although I used it lots when I lived in NH and made insulated curtains, handbags, and started a quilt, I have not used it at all since I moved to Boston. I'm hoping it will change with this project. For this dress I'm going to with some kind of traditional white (probably an antique white or off-white) in some kind of silky fabric that has a good deal of body. I'm right now planning on hemming the skirt up a bit (I am EXTREMELY proud of my legs, and feel like calf-length dresses make me look short and I don't plan on wearing heels) so it will fall knee-length. I'm going to cinch the waist with a blue ribbon.

Sarah, thanks for the etsy advice! I've been looking there for a couple odds and ends so far, and I'm pretty sure spi and I are ordering our wedding bands from one of the sellers there. I haven't really thought about what I want to do with my hair, except that I want it up so my tattoo will show, but I also want to keep it simple so I'm not afraid to move my head. I've toyed with the idea of just a fancy blue headband that will match the accent ribbon on the dress... but the whole thing is a year away so I'm still just throwing ideas around :)
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Mon Jul 26, 2010 10:05 pm UTC

Oh me yarm THAT DRESS IS AS CUTE AS HELL
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Enuja » Tue Jul 27, 2010 1:45 am UTC

You know, I hate the conventions of clothing designers drawings: the long, skinny limbs and absent hips in particular. I don't want clothes that would look good on a street sign pole: I want clothes that would look good on my short legs and large ass. So I can't really tell if I'd like that dress, because it's drawn on the conventionally long fashion form instead of a human form. But I'm sure it will be excellent fun to make the dress! (In other words, I'm ranting about the convention, not about the dress or about your choice of pattern.)

Way back on the martial arts versus dancing question: I would have said dancing. I did AiKiDo for about three years in college. At the time, I thought of it as, in part, an exercise thing, but eventually, and looking back at it, I buy more that it used my exercise capacity rather than increasing it: it just involved too much rest and not enough intensity to be real exercise. I also tried Tai Ch, and fencing, both of which I enjoyed, but I don't think I got grace from any of that. Dancing, however, is all about posture and grace. I don't think either dancing or martial arts classes are all that good as exercise (although anything that has bursts of high intensity or is at moderate intensity for a long time will be significant exercise): it depends on the proportion of watching and moving slowly for learning versus moving more intensely, I think. If the goal is to gain grace, dancing seems like the way to go to me.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby studyinserendipity » Tue Jul 27, 2010 2:06 am UTC

I am also not a fan of the convention, primarily because the chest on the drawings is usually too big proportionately. There is a picture with an actual model somewhere online... ah here http://voguepatterns.mccall.com/v2903-p ... age_id=857 There's a pic you can click on at the bottom. But as for the long limbs/no hips, that's kind of why I chose this dress and not a typical 'princessy' wedding dress. I actually felt really sad when I first saw my mom after she found out about the engagement and she had a bunch of pictures of wedding dresses that she was really excited about and looked really gorgeous on the models... and would have looked horrible on me. And just looking at them made me feel quite inadequate as a woman. I have no chest to hold up strapless dresses and halter tops, and I look like a linebacker with my kinda-jacked arms. I've come to terms with the fact that I feel most comfortable (and beautiful) in a flouncy skirt and really fitted tops with particular necklines, but I don't think my mom has come to that point yet. It's... kind of been a theme of this wedding planning so far. My grandmother pointed out that I'm the only daughter, and my mom doesn't get to go dress shopping, or bridesmaid dress shopping (my brothers are going to be my men of honor) or any of that typical mother-daughter stuff. And I didn't think of it that way until I got all excited to talk about my dress and show the pattern and I saw my mom's eyes. They weren't smiling. I'm really really really afraid I'm going to be disappointing my mom, and that would ruin my wedding completely for me.

Okay, now I'm tearing up, change the pace: My dress will be exciting! My mom will be happy because it's going to be awesome, even if she's not completely convinced yet. And I have a whole year to stop worrying about it {but fair warning, I will be probably be venting here about it}. Now bedtime!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby PictureSarah » Tue Jul 27, 2010 2:51 am UTC

I love your dress pattern, but when I first heard you were getting married, my fleeting thought on dresses and stuff was "I bet she'd look great in a strapless dress to show off her awesome arms!" So my feeling is that your arms are something to be shown off, not be self-conscious about. But I also think that of course you should wear whatever makes you the most comfortable and beautiful-feeling. Because it's your day, and you should be comfortable and beautiful-feeling.
On the headband thing, I think that would be awesome! I did a headband instead of a veil, for the same reason. IndulgenceCouture on Etsy made mine, (picture: http://cindydiaz.zenfolio.com/p36172034 ... #h2f30f6f2 ), her name is Susan, and she will take a description you give her, make a mock-up to show you, and then do whatever you want. Which is awesome. Lots of people on Etsy do that. Can you tell I am enthusiastic about Etsy?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Tue Jul 27, 2010 3:01 am UTC

studyinserendipity wrote:My grandmother pointed out that I'm the only daughter, and my mom doesn't get to go dress shopping, or bridesmaid dress shopping (my brothers are going to be my men of honor) or any of that typical mother-daughter stuff. And I didn't think of it that way until I got all excited to talk about my dress and show the pattern and I saw my mom's eyes. They weren't smiling. I'm really really really afraid I'm going to be disappointing my mom, and that would ruin my wedding completely for me.

*hugs* my mom lately has been very cry about things...I'm not doing things how she wants, I'm ruining our relationship, stuff like that. I keep trying to get used to the fact that I just can't live up to her ideal daughter but it still tears me up inside more than she'll ever know. I guess she's probably trying the best she can in her circumstances...I just hate that now almost every conversation we have whether it be on the phone or in person ends up in her crying at me. I hope you mom can accept this is your wedding and this is what you want and you will look beautiful because you are not because of the dress that she did or didn't get to help pick out. :)
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby meatyochre » Tue Jul 27, 2010 3:28 am UTC

I had to learn a while ago that I will never be good enough to make my mom happy. No matter how high my grades or SAT score or how happy I am in a relationship, there's still more I'm doing wrong than right. I eventually dropped out of college because I couldn't live up to her expectations of me anyway, and I was incredibly unhappy in higher education. It was an incredibly freeing act, and the first real adult decision I ever made for myself.

We still have a relationship (I visit her every couple months and we talk on facebook about political or religious ideology), but I don't ask her advice about life decisions... ever. I do what I want to do, and invite her along. As far as wedding plans, I'd be much more likely to consult my SO or a forum online than her (it's easier because we live 1.5 hours apart, might be different if she was right down the street). And I mean, she's not a bad person. I know she means well. But I can't function if I feel that someone else is trying to live vicariously through me.

Also cause my sister is a lesbian and I'm het, I'm the only one who can have "her grandkids." So occasionally she pokes me wondering when I'm going to get to it already

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:16 am UTC

correct me if i'm wrong, but can't your mom still go bridesmaid shopping? doesn't the bride choose those too? i feel that the mom would be part of that, or do you have a plan for them already too?
i've never been to a wedding let alone participated in one, so i may be real messed up on how things work
also, you could place your wedding dress in an unconventional store and have them not sell it and then pretend to get it with your mom or something? i know it's lieing but it depends on how bad you feel vs. how much effort it's worth. i'm not saying it's the best choice, just that it's there.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Moo » Tue Jul 27, 2010 6:20 am UTC

Cliche alert, studyinserendipity, but have you tried to talking to your mom? Explaining to her about why those dresses don't excite you? If you tell her you know that she might be a little dissappointed that it's not going how she imagined it, but you really want to balance making her happy with doing things the way you need to to enjoy the wedding yourself, maybe you can find things that you can do together that'll satisfy both of your fantasies? I know how easy these things are to suggest in a vacuum, and I sympathise with your problem, and hope that whatever you do you can resolve it so you can just totally enjoy the wedding planning without other dramas hanging over your head.
Proverbs 9:7-8 wrote:Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get an insult in return. Anyone who corrects the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby studyinserendipity » Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:51 am UTC

Thanks for the support, everyone. I did talk to my mom about the dress thing, and to kind of 'sweeten the deal' I told her that I wanted her to come fabric/shoe shopping with my grandmother and I when I start making the dress, and that made her feel better. Plus she's been getting into looking for ideas for centerpieces, save the dates, and invitations (stuff spi and I aren't really thinking about yet). I think the more we can put some of her ideas into the ceremony/reception while still being true to what spi and I want, the more excited she is going to be. It's just hard to get over that initial reaction; I thought she'd be quite happy with my dress idea and instead I had to convince her it was good, so now I keep second-guessing myself. But I think my mom and I have a good relationship (and at any rate, my dad does wonders when our communication is bad) so everything should go smoothly in the end.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Moo » Tue Jul 27, 2010 11:06 am UTC

My body is confusing me. I haven't had a period for 6 weeks, even though I did have cramps that I was sure was a sign of PMS once. Now I've got something crampy again. Except it's in a different spot to usual and off to one side - maybe ovulation? Except the very reason my periods are so unpredictable is because I am sure I don't actually ovulate. Weird body.
Proverbs 9:7-8 wrote:Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get an insult in return. Anyone who corrects the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you.
Hawknc wrote:FFT: I didn't realise Proverbs 9:7-8 was the first recorded instance of "haters gonna hate"

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Tue Jul 27, 2010 11:59 am UTC

Moo - I can usually tell which side ovulates, well used to be able to, because I'd get about a half day of slight cramping mid cycle more to one side or the other...so maybe?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby KestrelLowing » Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:49 pm UTC

Ok, so this is my first post in this thread, and it's slightly derailing the topic, but I have a question:

About a year ago, I went to the gyno and they said I had ovarian cysts. I'm not sure if it's PCOS or not (that was the first time I had gone to the gyno, and everything seemed to fly in one ear and out the other).

Anyway, the reason I went to the gyno was because I always had extremely irregular periods, and usually only 3 or 4 a year, but they'd last for at least a week, and up to two. Also, I'm 20, so it wasn't a simple case of just not getting into the rhythm yet.

Anyway, from what I remember, my gyno said that the reason I wasn't having periods is that I had cysts that stopped me from ovulating - trying to ovulate is what caused these cysts. The treatment is birth control. My question is how on earth does this work long term?

Birth control makes it so you don't ovulate, AFAIK, right? So, if my problem is that I'm not ovulating, how does not ovulating help? I understand the short-term effects - by making my body not ovulate, there shouldn't be any more cysts. Still, how will this help me long term?

I guess I'm wondering if I have to be on birth control for the rest of my life, and if it's even possible for me to have children somewhere down the line. I currently can't ask the gyno - I'm in another state for work, so I was just wondering if any of you had this condition explained a bit more thoroughly.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Ashlah » Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:07 pm UTC

Other women here will probably be much more knowledgeable about this than I, but I'll throw out a few things. It certainly sounds like it could be PCOS to me. I was diagnosed with it, although mind is very mild, and possibly a mis-diagnosis.
Birth control is a common treatment, but I think it has less to do with fertility/ovulation, and more to do with controlling other aspects of PCOS, such as the irregular periods, wonky insulin levels, and high testosterone (which leads to acne and hair growth).
This is where other women need to step in. I'm not really sure what the deal is with PCOS long-term. Because of this, take all of this with a grain of salt. I don't want to scare you. I remember when I was diagnosed, the doctor seemed to explain that going on birth control would stop it from progressing further. PCOS can lead to diabetes, and it can lead to infertility. On my most recent visit, my gyno recounted cases in which patients went on birth control for irregular periods in their teens, went off in adulthood to have a child, and found they did not have periods/didn't ovulate. My gyno works at a fertility clinic, and they help many women with PCOS to become pregnant.

I am not saying that you are infertile, and that's that, because obviously I don't know. PCOS is a spectrum thing, and no one can know for sure where you lie. (This is all assuming it is PCOS, of course.) Your gyno would be the best person to ask, and with all these questions you have, I would make an appointment whenever you get the chance.

Now that I've talked out of my butt about something I know only a little...someone else come be smart. :P

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Moo » Wed Jul 28, 2010 7:15 am UTC

@Amy and in general further to my post: it occurred to me later that something is formed and released, it just never matures to a proper ovum, so it's not unimaginable that I'll feel something during this process.

@KestrelLowing: this is a very brief explanation based on my own limited knowledge as a PCOS sufferer rather than a doctor, but there's some very good resources online and in books. Spoilered for wall of text.
Spoiler:
If you do indeed have PCOS, your body doesn't ovulate properly but it starts (like mentioned in my own situation above). The thing doesn't mature though and sits on the end of your falopian tube becoming a cyst, rather than an ovum that gets released into the uterus. Thing is, this release would have triggered a hormone cycle that would have eventually told your uterus to release the thickened lining. But your hormone cycle gets half way and then the trigger, the released ovum (or rather something it leaves behind when it gets released), doesn't happen so your body just keeps on thickening the uterus lining and thickening it and thickening it until it's so heavy it can't be supported and tears away. That is why we have irregular, and usually very heavy, "periods". All sorts of other hormonal triggers and reactions also don't happen due to this interrupted cycle, including your insulin levels being affected. Taking the pill means this process doesn't start so it can't be interrupted half way causing all sorts of silliness.

I was on the pill for 13 years, and came off recently to try and get pregnant. My symptoms have returned, but I know it's short term. I know at least one person for whom getting pregnant removed her PCOS. If that turns out not to be the case with me, I'll go back on the pill. There are other medications as far as I know but I am not at all familiar with them. Another route to treat PCOS is to control the insulin resistance (last I read up, it was unclear if the screwed up insulin caused the other hormone anomalies or vice versa). This was in my case recommended as something to do alongside hormonal treatment, not a possible treatment on its own. It involves Low GI eating and excercise to keep the insulin cycle well regulated. Metformin (and probably others) is a drug that can also asist your cells in better responding to insulin. I know another forumite worked very hard at regulating her diet but saw much improved results once she went on some sort of medication but I don't remember what kind and I won't tell her story for her, I'll let her weigh in if she wants to, she is a Woman thread regular.

If it is PCOS, it is important not to let it go untreated because although in and of itself it's not immediately dangerous, it increases your chances of many other illnesses: as mentioned, diabetes, due to the insulin craziness. Uteran cancer, due to the damage done by that lining getting so heavy it tears away and the fact that tissue is staying up in there a lot longer than it was meant to (as I understand it, this increases the risk of cell mutation but I could be wrong). Heart disease, due to many factors including the usual weight gain due to insulin resistance and the fact that it's male pattern, around your organs, due to the sex hormone imbalances.

Regarding getting pregnant: my gynae felt there was a chance I could conceive on my own, although I'm not holding out hopes but it shows it's not a given that you'll have trouble. We've been now trying for 3 months and in another 3 I'll go to the doc and say "OK we tried for 6 months like you said, time for the next plan". Then he'll give me a pill that stimulates ovulation and he has stated several times he is quite certain that is all it'll take. So while it might not be quite as quick and easy to get preggers with PCOS as your average woman, it's certainly not something to be thought of as impossible.
It is a disease that's more a pain in the arse to live with than actually being scary so don't fret. Why not try calling your doctor's office to just ask what he noted in your file that day so you know?
Proverbs 9:7-8 wrote:Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get an insult in return. Anyone who corrects the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you.
Hawknc wrote:FFT: I didn't realise Proverbs 9:7-8 was the first recorded instance of "haters gonna hate"

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby KestrelLowing » Wed Jul 28, 2010 12:11 pm UTC

Thanks Moo and Ashlah!

I figured it was something like that, but internet sites are notoriously inaccurate, so I thought I'd try another source to confirm.

Now if only my birth control actually took care of my acne... :|

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby AngrySquirrel » Wed Jul 28, 2010 12:18 pm UTC

On the subject of martial arts and dances.

Martial arts and dancing isn't all that different, depending a bit on what styles you go with (there are a lot of them).

For pure fitness I'd like to recommend kickboxing. (Yes, I know it's a sport and not a MA but it's fun goddammit!) It is very high intensity training for the entire body, in addition to doing wonders for your posture and confidence. Many people are scared away from contact sports because of the "contact" bit, but don't shun it until you try it. Getting hit in the head is more confusing than actually painful.

If you however are one of those who don't like the idea of sparring that much, but don't mind trying it out once in a while. And also are interested in something that will help on your general fitness level I'd recommend a Karate or Taekwon-Do school. There are however a huge buttload of different styles within these two styles. Avoid belt-factories and any style will probably suit you. In my old club we had two old ladies of respectively 60 and 62 years old, so I feel confident saying that these styles suits approx anyone.

If you are purely after self-defense Krav Maga is the way to go.

If you are interested in a grappling style(getting close and personal) I'd recommend Brazilian Jiu Jitzu or Judo.

For most martial arts a good general rule to keep in mind is to look at the instructor before you decide if you'll join or not. If the instructor claims his/her way is the only way or "best" style then I at least are going to stay the hell away from that club. Personally I prefer instructors that have experience from several different styles since they in my experience tend to know their stuff better. And also are less likely to be crazed fanatics.

Other styles I'd like to recommend taking a look at for no other reason that I find them fun are Wing Tsun, Capoeira and Kali Sikaran. These might be a bit harder to find though.

As for injuries. Many people I meet seem to be under the impression that MA's are an excuse for people to wail at eachother relentlessly. This is a very annoying misunderstanding. You'll never meet an instructor that will tell you to spar at full strength (if you do, get away cause that instructor is an idiot). In most martial arts you'll actually end up training for years before you are even allowed to spar at all, and in most they also demand that you wear a certain amount of safety equipment and padding. In fact, and now it's anecdotal evidence time, I've gotten a lot less injuries from training Martial Arts and striking sports than I have gotten from playing football (or soccer for you Americans). Actually I have gotten more injuries from old ladies at the bus than from training Martial Arts (don't ask). Me training martial arts consists of boxing from the age 12-15, taekwon-do from 16-18, wing tsun from 18-20 and kickboxing for the last year, with the occasional side trip into other styles for a lesson or two (krav maga, kali sikaran, bjj). Basically, I've been training MA's (and from now on I am including boxing and kickboxing in the MA-expression) for 13 years, on and off. In those years the only injury I've gained from MA's has been a sprained ankle (from jumping and landing sideways). From other stuff that has not been MA-related I've had a broken foot, several broken fingers and toes, concussions, torn ligaments, broken wrist, broken ribs, chipped a tooth and a broken knee-cap (I'm not even going to start on all the dislocations and sprains I've had). So from my very anecdotal personal experience I'd say training MA's is actually far safer and less painful than walking down the street or being nice to old ladies (really, don't ask).

As for dancing, my favourites are probably belly dancing (love that tummy!), salsa and other latin dances and hip hop-styles. Belly dancing is great for getting confident about your body, salsa makes you feel sexy and the hip hop-styles makes you feel badass.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby viscusanima » Wed Jul 28, 2010 4:52 pm UTC

Image

Saw this on my travels in the UK, thought of this thread!

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby podbaydoor » Wed Jul 28, 2010 6:26 pm UTC

Speaking of which, Shark Week is actually starting this weekend!
http://dsc.discovery.com/tv/shark-week/

AngrySquirrel - that's really useful and informative. My dream of starting a martial art is going to be indefinitely deferred until I get my finances together, but I'll definitely be reflecting on your advice when I get around to it.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby sophyturtle » Wed Jul 28, 2010 6:59 pm UTC

My shark week is starting right now!

Which reminds me, I should go check on my sponge. bbs.
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