[SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby AngrySquirrel » Fri Apr 15, 2011 11:57 am UTC

GraphiteGirl wrote:I think we should do something for science. Get as many people from the fora as possible, of all genders or lack thereof, to do a mood tracking journal for a year. They could do very brief notes each day unless they felt compelled to write more. At the end of the year we could analyse the data and look for cyclical trends or lack thereof. Would anyone be up for participating?

I'd be up for this, but I'm pretty notoriously bad at anything that involves routines and daily participation so don't know how much I can promise.

In other news, I now have a doctor's appointment on the 5th to talk about breast reduction surgery. Fucking hell it makes me nervous just to think about, and it's also far enough away for me to invent about a thousand excuses to not go. Gah. I'll have to fight myself on this one.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Apr 15, 2011 2:08 pm UTC

I don't think I'd do a mood journal. Past experience has shown that writing my moods down results in me actually intensifying my own moods by the act of writing it, and also intentionally hunting for something to feel bad about because "Day 1 - meh, Day 2 - meh, Day 3 - okay" doesn't sound as interesting.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby PictureSarah » Fri Apr 15, 2011 3:12 pm UTC

I like cyclespage because you can just tick the little boxes for headache, depression, irritability, and how severe they are. Also you can add notes in the box below, but I rarely do.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sandry » Fri Apr 15, 2011 7:13 pm UTC

semicharmed wrote:Sandry - try looking here! They're not 5 feet, but they're definitely big enough for a substantial rage hug.

Also, I'm off for a meeting, but I'd be down for tracking stuff.

hahaha, those are really nifty! Weirdly, bears don't seem to be an option, but I think I could console myself with a dragon or narwhal. :D

I could also give the tracking thing a go. I'm not amazingly good at doing things on a daily basis, but I'll try!

(If I were to note down my mood after reading this thread, I'd probably have an overall much more positive trend - you folks are awesome. <3)
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Fri Apr 15, 2011 7:42 pm UTC

Sandry wrote:(I keep returning to the thought that I want a five foot teddy bear to keep by my desk so that when things at work get very frustrating, I can give it big, angry hugs. I dunno why this is a fixation, but to my great sorrow I've found that getting giant teddy bears is a bit of an affair and decently expensive.)
my bf, got me this guy, and he's not 5 feet, but he gives the best hugs and cuddles and i can use him as a chair, too.
AngrySquirrel wrote:I'd be up for this, but I'm pretty notoriously bad at anything that involves routines and daily participation so don't know how much I can promise.
i am this too. maybe we should make a thread in, like faid for us? so that i will post whenever i'm online. that's i'd prob remember.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sandry » Fri Apr 15, 2011 8:01 pm UTC

suffer-cait wrote:
Sandry wrote:(I keep returning to the thought that I want a five foot teddy bear to keep by my desk so that when things at work get very frustrating, I can give it big, angry hugs. I dunno why this is a fixation, but to my great sorrow I've found that getting giant teddy bears is a bit of an affair and decently expensive.)
my bf, got me this guy, and he's not 5 feet, but he gives the best hugs and cuddles and i can use him as a chair, too.

Oooh. Your suggestion helped me find this: http://www.melissaanddoug.com/jumbo-bro ... teddy-bear

I think that might be pretty ideal... I would really like larger, but 80 bucks with free shipping is good enough for me.

...now I wonder if I can get it sent to my office reasonably...
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Cathy » Sat Apr 16, 2011 12:17 am UTC

Thanks for the hugs and the rest. My body has decided to dump on me all at once -- yeast infection, monthly, cramping... Joy of Joys.

At least my hunny is a sweetie and is giving me a rest-movie-happy night. <3

Hugs to everyone!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Feddlefew » Sat Apr 16, 2011 12:38 am UTC

I think someone I know on another forum posted a suicide note. I sent them an email today, but they made the post a week ago and haven't logged on sense oh gods what do I do?! They've always been moody and they'd been upset for the days leading up to the post.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Aaeriele » Sat Apr 16, 2011 12:44 am UTC

Sandry wrote:Oooh. Your suggestion helped me find this: http://www.melissaanddoug.com/jumbo-bro ... teddy-bear

I think that might be pretty ideal... I would really like larger, but 80 bucks with free shipping is good enough for me.

...now I wonder if I can get it sent to my office reasonably...


Spoiler:
Image


Feddlefew wrote:I think someone I know on another forum posted a suicide note. I sent them an email today, but they made the post a week ago and haven't logged on sense oh gods what do I do?! They've always been moody and they'd been upset for the days leading up to the post.


It depends, do you have any other way of getting in touch with them (directly, or indirectly via a shared acquaintance)? If not, there's not a lot you can do other than wait and hope they respond to one of your messages. And yes, that waiting sucks.
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Re: moodtracking

Postby Kewangji » Sat Apr 16, 2011 12:56 am UTC

GraphiteGirl wrote:I think we should do something for science. Get as many people from the fora as possible, of all genders or lack thereof, to do a mood tracking journal for a year. They could do very brief notes each day unless they felt compelled to write more. At the end of the year we could analyse the data and look for cyclical trends or lack thereof. Would anyone be up for participating?

As weather is thought to affect mood a lot, do you think writing what weather we had would be useful?

Anyway, I'm in! I'll forget on some days but I think it'll go well.
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Re: moodtracking

Postby Shivahn » Sat Apr 16, 2011 1:07 am UTC

Kewangji wrote:
GraphiteGirl wrote:I think we should do something for science. Get as many people from the fora as possible, of all genders or lack thereof, to do a mood tracking journal for a year. They could do very brief notes each day unless they felt compelled to write more. At the end of the year we could analyse the data and look for cyclical trends or lack thereof. Would anyone be up for participating?

As weather is thought to affect mood a lot, do you think writing what weather we had would be useful?

Anyway, I'm in! I'll forget on some days but I think it'll go well.

Weather and climate can have huge effects on mood. It is definitely worth recording, I think.

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Postby Plasmic-Turtle » Sat Apr 16, 2011 1:33 am UTC

Aaeriele that pic is super-cute!

Shivahn wrote:
Kewangji wrote:
GraphiteGirl wrote:I think we should do something for science. Get as many people from the fora as possible, of all genders or lack thereof, to do a mood tracking journal for a year. They could do very brief notes each day unless they felt compelled to write more. At the end of the year we could analyse the data and look for cyclical trends or lack thereof. Would anyone be up for participating?

As weather is thought to affect mood a lot, do you think writing what weather we had would be useful?

Anyway, I'm in! I'll forget on some days but I think it'll go well.

Weather and climate can have huge effects on mood. It is definitely worth recording, I think.
Yup, I fully agree! It's raining today :(

Fiddlefew I'm sorry, I don't really have any advice above what Aaeriele said. Just hugs to offer, that sounds like a horrible situation to be in.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Virtual_Aardvark » Sat Apr 16, 2011 1:43 am UTC

@Fiddlefew: Have you talked to any of the mods? Something similar happened here (I believe all pertaining posts have been removed) and one of our mods managed to track them down and contact the relevant authorities.

Aeriele you remind me so damn much of one of my friends. I don't know if it's your expressions or facial structure or what but I seriously did a double take there.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Isotope_238 » Sat Apr 16, 2011 6:11 am UTC

So I got my braces off on Wednesday, which is pretty awesome. I didn't like having braces, but I don't regret them either, because they were necessary for health reasons, not just cosmetic. The problem is that I really, really hate how my teeth look now. I didn't mind how my teeth looked when they were crooked or had braces on them. I don't have any other problems with my appearance. I just hate my new, supposed to be more attractive now that they're straight teeth. I've never been deeply unhappy with any part of my looks, and this is so sudden and specific. I don't like my teeth, and I don't like being this upset over what seems like it should be not an issue at all.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby AngrySquirrel » Sat Apr 16, 2011 9:20 am UTC

suffer-cait wrote:
AngrySquirrel wrote:I'd be up for this, but I'm pretty notoriously bad at anything that involves routines and daily participation so don't know how much I can promise.
i am this too. maybe we should make a thread in, like faid for us? so that i will post whenever i'm online. that's i'd prob remember.

That would probably help me remember, but dunno if others would let it be?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby PhoenixEnigma » Sat Apr 16, 2011 9:56 am UTC

AngrySquirrel wrote:
suffer-cait wrote:
AngrySquirrel wrote:I'd be up for this, but I'm pretty notoriously bad at anything that involves routines and daily participation so don't know how much I can promise.
i am this too. maybe we should make a thread in, like faid for us? so that i will post whenever i'm online. that's i'd prob remember.
That would probably help me remember, but dunno if others would let it be?
Make the thread, and I'd be able to add another cis-male set of data points to the survey :)
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Angua » Sat Apr 16, 2011 1:06 pm UTC

Isotope_238 wrote:So I got my braces off on Wednesday, which is pretty awesome. I didn't like having braces, but I don't regret them either, because they were necessary for health reasons, not just cosmetic. The problem is that I really, really hate how my teeth look now. I didn't mind how my teeth looked when they were crooked or had braces on them. I don't have any other problems with my appearance. I just hate my new, supposed to be more attractive now that they're straight teeth. I've never been deeply unhappy with any part of my looks, and this is so sudden and specific. I don't like my teeth, and I don't like being this upset over what seems like it should be not an issue at all.
As someone who had braces for 5.5 years, congratulations! Remember to wear your retainer religiously or they just go back though :P Also, your teeth will feel slimey for a while which is really disconcerting.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Artemisia » Sun Apr 17, 2011 12:27 am UTC

isn't that just the glazing? they're meant to feel, uhm, not sharp and metallic... (: slimey sounds ick...

@FF: speaking as admin of a forum, I managed to track down the address of one of my users through the help of other forumites as well as a real-life friend I found using bits of information posted here and there. This wasn't for the same scenario (rather something a lot more positive) but I concur that it can be done when there's a real *need* for it.
Best of luck and hugs, sounds like a sucky situation ):
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Cathy » Mon Apr 18, 2011 3:56 am UTC

I am so tired all the time. I know I've been complaining a lot in this forum, and I hope you guys don't mind. It's getting to be the end of the semester and the pressure's on. I've got projects all over the place and tests coming up. I've been jogging 2-3 times a week, but I haven't been eating to compensate for it. I've been applying for jobs but none of them are biting. I feel terminally tired.

Uuugh I wish I had some muscle/fat on my body so that there was something for it to eat. Because I'm not good at eating. I'm also not good at being poor.

The thing I cut most when I feel low on money (whether it's in my head or not) is food. Probably because I used to be overweight, but now I'm not and it's making me get underweight. It's bad for me but I don't realize I haven't eaten until the day after I haven't eaten...

Gah, going to bed. Super hugs for the Women forum. If you wanna send me cookies, I will email you my address because I want cookies and sugar. Lots and lots of sugar.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Artemisia » Mon Apr 18, 2011 8:33 am UTC

at the risk of sounding very motherly, Cathy: sugar gives a short-term energy boost but wears you out in the long run.
Better to eat slow-release energisers like bread, pasta, rice, and those don't cost the world. If you want to save money on food, this would be a good start.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Hawknc » Mon Apr 18, 2011 8:56 am UTC

I wasn't sure where to put this, but I thought this might be the appropriate place for some cheerful news about an all-women moving company that specialises in women fleeing dangerous relationships as well as the elderly and disabled.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Moo » Mon Apr 18, 2011 11:18 am UTC

Aerielle, please don't tell me if the way the carebear seems to be looking right at me was a happy coincedence of that awesome photo!

Hugs to the other ladies who're coping with all sorts of crap :( *hugs*
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Ashlah » Mon Apr 18, 2011 3:01 pm UTC

Cathy wrote:The thing I cut most when I feel low on money (whether it's in my head or not) is food.

Food stamps have been super helpful for me while in school. Food is such a hard thing to spend money on when you haven't got a lot of it, so it's much easier when it isn't really your money (ha). I don't know if that's a possibility for you. I know here in Oregon, as a student, I had to prove that I work at my job at least 20 hours a week. I think that is a bullshit rule, but whatever. During school, I typically work 15 hours a week, so I waited to apply until the busy times of year, when I work about 35 hours a week. So they think I have a lot more money than I do, but I still get over a hundred dollars each month. I know stuff like this varies a lot state to state, but I figure it's a worthwhile suggestion.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sandry » Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:23 pm UTC

Aaeriele wrote:
Sandry wrote:Oooh. Your suggestion helped me find this: http://www.melissaanddoug.com/jumbo-bro ... teddy-bear

I think that might be pretty ideal... I would really like larger, but 80 bucks with free shipping is good enough for me.

...now I wonder if I can get it sent to my office reasonably...


Spoiler:
Image


*grin* Now I will feel much less silly about this. And you're awesome (once again? As always? Something like that).
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby podbaydoor » Mon Apr 18, 2011 9:36 pm UTC

The right side of my face has broken out in a rash of zits. RAGE.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby existential_squirrrel » Tue Apr 19, 2011 2:09 am UTC

my knee is killing me, my eyebrows are bushy beyond all reason, my tweezers broke in half (I'm not sure how the hell that happened), and I can't get rid of these obnoxious zits above my nose, I'm tired, and I have a shit- ton of exams to study for. at least the damn drama shit is leaving me the hell alone.

the joys of finals week... I will be living in the science department from here on out.
grumble grumble grumble.......... do not piss me off or you will have existential angry squirrrel....

[/rant]

on the bright side, I got nominated for academic scholar and was personally asked to join a research project by the lead investigator :)

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Hope_ » Tue Apr 19, 2011 2:18 am UTC

existential_squirrrel wrote:on the bright side, I got nominated for academic scholar and was personally asked to join a research project by the lead investigator :)
That sounds really really amazing, congratulations! :)

*Offers hugs* for the other stuff. I know it must be awful at the moment but things like the exams, revision and such like, they are only temporary and they'll be over with soon. And when they're over you can sleep and your spot's will probably die down. :P

Seriously though, congrats on the academic scholar and research things, that's something to be really proud of.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby AngrySquirrel » Tue Apr 19, 2011 10:32 am UTC

existential_squirrrel wrote:do not piss me off or you will have existential angry squirrrel....

And that would just be confusing. So don't piss her off you people who potentially could do so!

Who am I? What am I doing here? What is my purpose? Do I really exist?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby ashtraygirl » Tue Apr 19, 2011 7:50 pm UTC

GraphiteGirl wrote:I think we should do something for science. Get as many people from the fora as possible, of all genders or lack thereof, to do a mood tracking journal for a year. They could do very brief notes each day unless they felt compelled to write more. At the end of the year we could analyse the data and look for cyclical trends or lack thereof. Would anyone be up for participating?

I would.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Plasmic-Turtle » Tue Apr 19, 2011 11:30 pm UTC

Isotope I'm sorry to hear you're not happy with how your teeth look now! For me braces were definitely a positive change, mine were coming out in absolutely crazy places due to the crowding, and were difficult to brush. My mum had to take on 2 jobs to pay for them, I owe her so much for that.

Is it possible that you don't like them because they sort of seem bigger than before, like big horse teeth-ish? I vaguely remember mine feeling like that at first, because the metal in the middle kind of broke up my perception of tooth-size, and when the braces came off all of a sudden there were these two huge front teeth... it took some while getting used to, but now I absolutely love 'em. What I didn't get used to was having the permanent wire retainer at the back of my bottom front teeth. No-one told me part of my braces would be permanently there before I got them or at any time while I had them on, so I was upset to still have a wire in my mouth. Although it wasn't visible, I hadn't been able to feel the back of my teeth with my tongue for the years I'd had braces, and it really bothered me that I'd never feel it again without there being wire and waxy stuff in the way. So about a year ago I made the decision to have this removed, against the advice of my orthodontist (although my dentist felt it would help with cleaning).

existential_squirrrel wrote:my eyebrows are bushy beyond all reason, my tweezers broke in half (I'm not sure how the hell that happened)

:shock: Are your eyebrows bushy, or are we talking a forest of ents here?!
Just kidding, they sound like some pretty shoddy (or old?) tweezers though... and HUGE congrats on those academic successes! All the best for your shit-ton of exams, it sounds like you've got the smarts and work ethic to come out OK though!

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Isotope_238 » Wed Apr 20, 2011 4:49 am UTC

I don't know exactly why I don't like my teeth. It sounds silly, even to me, but I'm still bothered.

My orthodontist is trying to talk me into a permanent retainer. No. He didn't bother to mention the "rest of your life" aspect until long after I had braces, and I'm more than a little peeved at him for that. I'm extremely peeved at his constant insistence that I wasn't in pain during whatever they were doing this month. Newsflash: if I'm telling you I'm in pain, Dr. Competent Jerk, who are you going to believe, me or you? /bitching

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Wed Apr 20, 2011 4:58 am UTC

i think it's possible you're just not used to them. give it a few months, wear your retainer every day, like you should. if you still can't handle it, you can always take out your retainer and let them adjust back. not the best use of money though. also, that's what i did, and while i'm ok with how i look, i wish i hadn't.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Plasmic-Turtle » Wed Apr 20, 2011 5:26 am UTC

suffer-cait how long did your teeth take to adjust back?
I've had my permanent retainer off for about a year now, and haven't noticed any change so far, although one of my wisdom teeth is impacting and I've been told I should really get it taken out as it's making it far more likely my teeth'll go crooked again. I did keep the retainer in for about 6 years after my braces came off though. I'm not really too concerned if my bottom teeth go a bit crooked again though, they're not the ones that show when I smile, and I find it easier to brush properly with no retainer than I would if they got a little more crooked.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby suffer-cait » Wed Apr 20, 2011 8:49 am UTC

i think it took me a year to reach the point where they are now. It may vary depending on what exactly was done to your teeth and why. I had too little space for my teeth, but didn't pull. so after braces, i still had too little space. where as if i had pulled, maybe i would have had plenty space and nothing would have changed. actually, no, cause my dad and his sister had teeth pulled, and we all have the same crooked i-stopped-wearing-my-retainer tooth.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Moo » Wed Apr 20, 2011 8:59 am UTC

I don't think I was ever given a retainer after my braces (do you call them "railway tracks" too?) came off. I did wear retainers for years before, though; and they did remove my bottom molers to make more room in my mouth. I don't remember if that was before or after the braces, though.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby crowey » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:59 am UTC

I had a retainer after my braces (we also call them railway tracks in the UK). I wore it for about a year and was supposed to carry on for longer but stopped wearing it when I got glandular fever. My teeth moved a little bit during that time so it didn't fit afterwards. But, despite my orthodontist's tutting and warnings, they haven't moved at all since then and it's been 10 years, so I guess they're this way forever.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby studyinserendipity » Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:31 am UTC

I got my braces off a little over 10 years ago, and I got one permanent retainer (bottom teeth) and a removable one (upper teeth). I still have both of them; the permanent one is, well, always stuck to my teeth (which takes some skill to floss correctly through it) and the removable one I try to wear every other or every 3rd night while I'm asleep. Sometimes I'll go a week or two without wearing it, and then it's a bit tight, but if I wear it a few nights in a row everything goes back. I got braces because I had a huge gap in between my front teeth and it made my tiny mouth hurt lots with all the other teeth crowding in, so I'm happy the braces worked and I'll do whatever it takes to keep them where they are.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby jmrz » Wed Apr 20, 2011 1:28 pm UTC

I had the same "wait a minute, this isn't what my teeth look like" thing when I first had my braces off and yes, my teeth felt slimy. SO weird. I have a wire glued to the back of my teeth which really doesn't bother me much at all. I barely think about it most of the time unless something gets stuck in it (croissants are awful for this).

I would advise against letting your teeth go back to how they were before, given that you said it wasn't a purely cosmetic procedure. It is just one of those things that can take a while to adjust to as you aren't used to your appearance being that way.

I also had my wisdom teeth out because they said that they would cause issues if they came through. If you can have them taken out, I'd recommend it, it's not like they are that useful especially if they are going to be painful.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Angua » Wed Apr 20, 2011 1:39 pm UTC

With my retainers after braces, it was full-time for a year (but I could take them out while eating), followed by only at nights for another year.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ » Wed Apr 20, 2011 1:55 pm UTC

Isotope_238 wrote:I don't know exactly why I don't like my teeth. It sounds silly, even to me, but I'm still bothered.

My orthodontist is trying to talk me into a permanent retainer. No. He didn't bother to mention the "rest of your life" aspect until long after I had braces, and I'm more than a little peeved at him for that. I'm extremely peeved at his constant insistence that I wasn't in pain during whatever they were doing this month. Newsflash: if I'm telling you I'm in pain, Dr. Competent Jerk, who are you going to believe, me or you? /bitching

Dude. If you have a doctor who is telling you you're not in pain when you're telling him you are, you know what they call that doctor?

Fired.

You can find a new one, and I recommend it. It's one thing for him to be trying to talk you into a retainer, it's completely another for him to be telling you what you are or aren't feeling.
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