[SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Shro » Fri Apr 20, 2012 5:51 pm UTC

Also, with shorts/shorts + tights:
plaid-shirt-denim-jacket-outfit.jpeg
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Amie » Fri Apr 20, 2012 6:00 pm UTC

While we're on the subject of clothing, can anyone suggest some types of dresses/tops that I can get that will conceal my huge, bulging belly? I have a disproportionate body and my tummy is the only place where a size M isn't a perfect fit. If I get an L or an XL, everywhere else is a really loose crappy fit and sometimes even an L won't fit me well at the tummy. I don't know about any tops/dresses that are made keeping this body type in mind. So if anyone has any ideas, please shoot them at me :( Also, um, this is a bit embarrassing but is there a name clothes like that are called by? So I can be clear without giving the people at clothes shops an entire description of what I want.

I tried googling it but I... don't think I am very good with my description or my general understanding of such things so >.<
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Shro » Fri Apr 20, 2012 6:09 pm UTC

empire waist/line/silhouette.

I know it might seem embarrassing, but you can try looking in the maternity lines. Even if you don't end up getting anything, it'll give you a good idea what kinds of "silhouettes" would fit.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Amie » Fri Apr 20, 2012 6:30 pm UTC

I tried the empire waistline thing but it just accentuates my belly and I look pregnant for real.
Summer is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay.
And I, should contemplate this change... to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain... turn away.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Hyphe » Fri Apr 20, 2012 7:32 pm UTC

Angua wrote:I have a dark blue/black denim jacket

Hey wow, Angua, you have my favourite jacket! Only yours seems to have fewer holes in it than mine does. (I mostly wear it with jeans because, I mostly only wear jeans).

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Angua » Fri Apr 20, 2012 7:48 pm UTC

:) I got it in a charity shop :) (it's great when you work there, as you get first pick!).
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Enuja » Fri Apr 20, 2012 9:45 pm UTC

Amie, commercially produced clothing fits and perfectly flatters only one person: the fit model, the person the clothes were designed for. You don't have a "strange" body: everyone has a different body, and clothing produced in set sizes will never fit most, or even a reasonably large percentage of, people. In movies, even the T-shirts are altered to fit the actors. The problem is the system, not your body. You are not weird: you are just normally unique (as strange as those two words are together).

So, what do you do about it? In part, you just deal with the fact that, without a ton of cash, a designer and seamstress, your clothes simply aren't going to be perfect. But you can also alter your clothing. Tailors exist, and they can make the clothes you buy flatter you so much more. (A friend of mine just payed $40 to have a suit jacket altered.) You can also learn to sew, and alter your own clothes. I've been too busy lately to do much (and I'm definitely still learning), but I buy clothing at thrift stores (so it's cheap and I'm not throwing money away if I destroy it) and then alter that clothing. I baste to figure out how the fit needs to work, and then I use my sewing machine to make it happen.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Amie » Sat Apr 21, 2012 5:57 am UTC

I tried learning how to sew :P It... didn't go very well. I guess I'm just going to have to keep buying huge sizes and alter them. Tailors are hard to find near where I live but I'll try.
Summer is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay.
And I, should contemplate this change... to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain... turn away.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Mon Apr 23, 2012 7:01 pm UTC

flintlockpistols wrote:
Fractal_Tangent wrote:Any specific reason? What specifically about messing up the body?


I don't know, she won't say. I think she might not be comfortable with the idea of me taking it.

Cassi wrote:How old are you and where do you live? I just went to the doctor myself when I wanted to go on the pill, but that's a lot easier with the NHS when I didn't have to worry about paying for anything (and also I was 18 and not that far off going to uni anyway, so probably a bit different).

Maybe try taking your mum with you to speak to a doctor though, and the three of you discuss your options?


I'm 14 and in Kansas. I remember from sex ed that we can go to the doctor and get it without parental permission, but my mom'd find out and get upset. D:

Thanks, though!

My mom was against it for a few reasons (religious being one) but additionally, have to remember in our parent's time there were different issues than there are today. My mom has told me in her day there was only one really, and everyone just called it the pill. Only one. A lot of people - including her - had blood clot issues result from it which for her was very health threatening, and can be life threatening. People who tried it when they were young and had such major health issues with it, tossed it and never looked again, likely are not aware of the multitude of much safer options these days. My guess is your mom tried it when young, had blood clot or some sort of similar issue, and never looked back and is not aware of all the changes and options of today. Maybe making a list of the ones you think would be best to try and why, sitting down with her with said chart and then going to the doctor to discuss would change her mind.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sungura » Mon Apr 23, 2012 7:09 pm UTC

Amie wrote:I tried learning how to sew :P It... didn't go very well. I guess I'm just going to have to keep buying huge sizes and alter them. Tailors are hard to find near where I live but I'll try.

Look at period clothing of when things were built for certain body types. For example, I have a curvy body and dress patterns that are "retro" based more on 50's styling (https://www.google.com/search?q=50%27s+ ... 8QTjzMz4Aw) look amazing on me.

For the body type you describe you want to avoid any horizontal lines at your waist so low rise jeans and pants with longer shirts that fall past the waist are going to create a taller look concealing what you dont like. Avoid the external-belt look and such even if it's up under your chest. Pick fitted shirts that flare out some after being fitted at the waistline. If you really hate it and want a flatter look from the side profile maybe look into an underbust corset that you can wear under your clothes?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby TheOtherCheek » Mon Apr 23, 2012 7:28 pm UTC

I've worked in the fashion industry, as both a model and a consultant, so, I might be able to help a bit. Try colour blocking (ie) dark, neutral top and bottom, with more colourful jackets or sweaters over top. Stay away from crazy patterns. Try fitted but not tight tops. Bulky will make you look bigger. Try to favour a-line skirts, and jeans that sit on your hips not waist, and are boot cut. If you are short, avoid skirts that are too long, or pants with wide legs or bell bottoms. Avoid skinny jeans at all costs. Wear necklaces and scarves that keep people's eyes up higher. Get a good bra that lifts your breasts, too. Avoid horizontal stripes. Don't be afraid to play around with different styles, or ask a clerk for help in the stores.

A woman doesn't have to have a perfect body to look perfect. :D The important thing is to try and love who you are in this moment, and do what you can to try and get fit for your body type. Set realistic goals for yourself, and be kind to you.

You can also look through some back issues of Oprah's O Magazine online...which is free. She often has fashion issues that deal with these types of questions.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Amie » Tue Apr 24, 2012 11:27 am UTC

Thanks, you two! Amy, I looked at those dresses and I can't wear them as much as I love the look because my tummy :( I will avoid horizontal lines though. Corsets can be a pain to get over here but I'll certainly try.

TheOtherCheek: Thanks, I am in fact, short! I wear jeans that are not too loose but they aren't skin fits. Is that about right? Also, I wear tops that have really loose fittings at the waist. They do make me look bigger but they conceal the tummy. I don't know what else to do. I had to buy new shirts and all of them are perfect fits everywhere else except my tummy. I know I should probably exercise more but it's that phase of my life where I have no motivation to even pick myself up and comb my hair :/ Yay, me!
Summer is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay.
And I, should contemplate this change... to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain... turn away.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Sprocket » Tue Apr 24, 2012 5:04 pm UTC

I so often can't tell if I'm actually being crazy, over-sugared, needy, angsty, or if I'm just pre-menstrual.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby TheOtherCheek » Tue Apr 24, 2012 8:34 pm UTC

Amie wrote:Thanks, you two! Amy, I looked at those dresses and I can't wear them as much as I love the look because my tummy :( I will avoid horizontal lines though. Corsets can be a pain to get over here but I'll certainly try.

TheOtherCheek: Thanks, I am in fact, short! I wear jeans that are not too loose but they aren't skin fits. Is that about right? Also, I wear tops that have really loose fittings at the waist. They do make me look bigger but they conceal the tummy. I don't know what else to do. I had to buy new shirts and all of them are perfect fits everywhere else except my tummy. I know I should probably exercise more but it's that phase of my life where I have no motivation to even pick myself up and comb my hair :/ Yay, me!


Aw hon...I hope my comment about fitness didn't make you feel uncomfortable. Motivation can be a very elusive thing, which I know from personal experience. hehe I guess what I was trying to say is that it's OK to be exactly where we are at any given time, but to also know that we have some power. I have struggled with my weight at times, too. I do understand what you are talking about and have a great deal of compassion.

The pants sound fine. Just stay away from bell bottoms or pants that are flared, because they can make you look boxy and look shorter than you are

About tops...you don't want them skin tight because that can extenuate the tummy, but a top that is too big can actually make you look bigger than you are. So, try to find a top that follows your shape, but isn't too loose or constricting. Wearing a top and bottom that is the same dark colour will add some height also. I know the natural impulse is to cover your tummy up, but try to get past that thinking because your lines will be much more flattering if you don't.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby mochafairy » Tue Apr 24, 2012 10:16 pm UTC

I thought I'd share this, because it made me giggle.

I'm well endowed in the chest region, enough so that many of these apply (1,2,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12), and our little kitten as noticed that they make a great place to hang out when I'm reading. I'm guessing it's much easier to shove her face into my face while I'm not paying attention to her, and she's a little attention lover. So, my SO-husband-man noticed this, and he thought it was hilarious. He has dubbed my boobs the kitten shelf.

No more "the girls" or "the twins". Nope. Just "The Kitten Shelf". :P
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby dragon » Wed Apr 25, 2012 1:53 am UTC

Hahaha, #2 probably leads to #1.
Context? What context?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Aaeriele » Wed Apr 25, 2012 3:05 am UTC

Sungura wrote:People who tried it when they were young and had such major health issues with it, tossed it and never looked again, likely are not aware of the multitude of much safer options these days. My guess is your mom tried it when young, had blood clot or some sort of similar issue, and never looked back and is not aware of all the changes and options of today. Maybe making a list of the ones you think would be best to try and why, sitting down with her with said chart and then going to the doctor to discuss would change her mind.


I think it might be time to link http://bedsider.org/methods again.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby mochafairy » Wed Apr 25, 2012 3:44 am UTC

Speaking of bc, my doc wants me off the pill because I have an increased stroke risk due to my heart being a total brat.

I want to keep taking some type of birth control. My husband and I are not ready for kids, I'm not healthy enough for kids right now, but we do eventually want kids.

My doc agrees that I should not be having kids at the moment, so we're thinking something with a bit of "I can't really fuck this up" buffer.

I know there's the ParaGard, and that one is hormone free. Does anyone have any other suggestions for when I go get my red velvet tardis checked out?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Aaeriele » Wed Apr 25, 2012 3:46 am UTC

mochafairy wrote:red velvet tardis


best euphemism ever
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby bluebambue » Wed Apr 25, 2012 5:06 am UTC

mochafairy wrote:Speaking of bc, my doc wants me off the pill because I have an increased stroke risk due to my heart being a total brat.

I want to keep taking some type of birth control. My husband and I are not ready for kids, I'm not healthy enough for kids right now, but we do eventually want kids.

My doc agrees that I should not be having kids at the moment, so we're thinking something with a bit of "I can't really fuck this up" buffer.

I know there's the ParaGard, and that one is hormone free. Does anyone have any other suggestions for when I go get my red velvet tardis checked out?
I think the nuva ring also puts very low amounts of hormons into the body's system as a whole.

Totally unrelated:
I made earring holders. I've seen a mesh holder like this in my ant's house for ages, but never seen one for sale. So far it is so much easier to use than any traditional jewelry holders, easily accommodates all different sizes, and you can see all of your earrings at once.
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this first one is for the ones with hooks. Cardboard, covered with an old t-shirt for padding (I used 1 layer, but I think 2 would have been better), and then window screen mesh on top.
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Just the window screen mesh.
the second one is for ones that have straight things to go through ears that have large backings.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Plasmic-Turtle » Wed Apr 25, 2012 6:26 am UTC

mochafairy wrote:He has dubbed my boobs the kitten shelf.

Aaeriele wrote:
mochafairy wrote:red velvet tardis
best euphemism ever
Oh women's thread, how you make my day!

blueambue where'd you get the mesh? A fabric shop? Or you tore up some old window screens? I've seen those things many a time but never felt the need to get one myself... until you pointed out the practicality of it. My earrings are all loose and tangled in a box somewhere - the ones that aren't in my purse or on my bedside table or lost elsewhere, that is! You have some cool earrings, too. Y'know, when I first read your message, I read 'aunt' as if it were in a strong American accent, and then I realised the issue was that you'd actually written 'ant'! :lol:

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Amie » Wed Apr 25, 2012 8:39 am UTC

TheOtherCheek wrote:Aw hon...I hope my comment about fitness didn't make you feel uncomfortable. Motivation can be a very elusive thing, which I know from personal experience. hehe I guess what I was trying to say is that it's OK to be exactly where we are at any given time, but to also know that we have some power. I have struggled with my weight at times, too. I do understand what you are talking about and have a great deal of compassion.

The pants sound fine. Just stay away from bell bottoms or pants that are flared, because they can make you look boxy and look shorter than you are

About tops...you don't want them skin tight because that can extenuate the tummy, but a top that is too big can actually make you look bigger than you are. So, try to find a top that follows your shape, but isn't too loose or constricting. Wearing a top and bottom that is the same dark colour will add some height also. I know the natural impulse is to cover your tummy up, but try to get past that thinking because your lines will be much more flattering if you don't.

You comment didn't make me feel uncomfortable at all! (: I was just pointing out that I can't do much in that regard right now. I don't think I can pull off many types of clothes but I'm going to keep trying to find a look that suits me :) Thanks for your help!
Summer is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay.
And I, should contemplate this change... to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain... turn away.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby studyinserendipity » Wed Apr 25, 2012 12:02 pm UTC

bluebambue, that was a good idea to put the t-shirt in the back for padding, plus what a neat way to reuse old t-shirts. I had a traditional holder when I was in high school (although it was pretty neat, it looked like a lion) but it was hard to figure out how to arrange the earrings so they would all fit and not tangle up with each other because of the placement of the holes. Your version solves the problems by making the placement variable!

I've been meaning to post because my last period was super-awesome! I got to use my new GladRags and they were amazing. I had originally planned on wearing them once or twice and then using the rest of my disposable pads, but the GladRags were so comfortable that I couldn't bear to use the other ones again. I also tried some sea sponge tampons and I really liked them. They were messy, so I still used disposable ones at work (sometimes I have to use the kids bathroom in our classroom, and the sinks are out in the hallway) but the sponges worked well when I was at home, at night, and when I was having a lighter flow on the last couple of days. It was a great success, and I've never felt so excited and pleased with my Shark Week!

Also! I sewed a shirt. The pattern was from a shirt I already owned; I traced it onto newspaper, modified it a bit, then used it to cut up some jersey fabric I had laying around. I'm quite proud of it and I enjoy wearing it - too bad it's been too cold lately to wear it to work.
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that weird bump in the middle is the drawstring on my sweatpants, not a pull in the fabric :)
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Apparently Anonymous » Wed Apr 25, 2012 12:04 pm UTC

I wanted to get on the pill (to not have to worry about condoms breaking etc. and I guess to be able to have sex without a condom - pregnancy-wise that's considered safe enough by most, right?), so I went to the doctor and got some advice and a prescription

...but now I'm not so sure. There seems to be all kinds of side effects (like weight gain, which is supposedly less present with the pill I got (called "Yasmin" if anybody's familiar with it), but still stresses me out) and I just feel very uneasy about risking that, especially now the competition season started (I'm a competitive athlete).

Still, to stick with just condoms feels kind of unsafe as well. I guess it just scares me a bit that no matter what I do, there's always the risk of getting pregnant (on that note, Shark Week's a few days late...).

I've read about different methods on the Bedsider page, but it'd be nice to hear about some personal experiences. Do any of you have any birth control methods you would/would not recommend?

Also, how long would you wait for Shark Week to start before worrying?

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Shro » Wed Apr 25, 2012 1:09 pm UTC

Birth Control works different for everyone.For me, I hated the pill. I hated having something to remember to take every day. I love my Mirena. I didn't gain weight on the pill, I lost it. I didn't gain weight on the Mirena. My periods are practically non-existent. I get/notice a couple of cramps and PMS symptoms, but I think that's also me growing more sensitive to hormonal changes in my body vs. environmental changes (finally, after a decade and a half of menses).

How long to wait is up to an individual/length of cycle/how much you're freaking out. Pregnancy tests these days are pretty good, and can detect levels of Human Chorionic Gonadotropin at levels present in the body a few days before Shark Week, so the technology is no barrier. Stress can keep Shark Week from showing up, so if you're stressing even more about the possibility of being pregnant, and sometimes the only way to break the cycle is just to take a pregnancy test. I've heard so many stories about women getting their periods the day after, or even hours after they took a pregnancy test. That said, the 1-4 days late is usually cycle-noise (depending on the length of your cycle... if it's much longer than 28 days, then you might as well wait a little longer). Beyond that is when taking a pregnancy test becomes the next logical step.

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I keep my earrings in bead/tackle organizers. I made a sheet of paper with all of my nail polish colors on them, with all the names written out. I went shopping and found a dark teal 2-ply cashmere cardigan for $25. And a light blue modal cardigan for $13. And a teal cowl neck dolman sleeve tunic that's just long enough to be worn with leggings. Or maybe a pair of short shorts and heels for wearing out. Also bought a romper for my sister. Her first, and she loves it. I just got a bunch of gorgeous old sari fabric that I need to make things out of.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby meridian » Wed Apr 25, 2012 1:36 pm UTC

Now I want to have a sewing party. I kind of got the itch in Jan and Feb, when I was working on costumes for a friend and now I want more projects!! (It also wards off the weekend depression.) I just need to get a work station set up in my room and I'll be good to go.

Anyway! Getting an IUD on Friday. I got stuck with a morning appointment so I have to go back to work after (anticipating much discomfort in my desk chair after). I'm very much looking forward to getting this done and over with and having nobabies for a good stretch of years. I'm getting a mirena, so I also have some concern about weight gain, as I don't really need any more, but I think I will be continually okay with this if my hormones remain mellow.

I did try NuvaRing for about 6 months. It went well and I was pretty good with it, on the whole. It never liked to stay in my vagina though. I think it's a shape issue for me. Most months, this was okay, but every once in a while, I had to pull it out and re-insert it to get it from pressing against my pelvic bone in an uncomfortable fashion. I'm absolutely paranoid about bladder/kidney infections, so this got to be a big concern in the back of my mind. At the end, it got to the point where the process of re-inserting the ring several times in one day caused dryness (that compounded the placement problem) and some irritation. All that said? it worked amazingly well when I was having PIV sex. Didn't have to think about it at all then.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby PictureSarah » Wed Apr 25, 2012 3:42 pm UTC

On Birth Control: I am feeling very discouraged on this front. I was prescribed the NuvaRing on the 9th, and by the next week, I felt exhausted all the time, uber-depressed, was crying daily, and extremely irritable. I thought that the last time I used the NuvaRing, it was mostly free of side effects, but looking back on it, I wonder if the depression I was experiencing was partly the result of the NuvaRing, and I thought that's just the way I was. So I took it out on the 19th.
Now I don't know what to do. The pill made me gain a hideous amount of weight in a short amount of time. The depo made me suicidally depressed, and made me bleed for a month and a half at a time, among other things. The Paragard gave me incredibly bad cramps all month long, not just during sharkweek. Maybe I should try the Mirena, but I'm kind of afraid of progesterone-only options after the Depo. We've been using condoms, but honestly, our use has been less-than-perfect as time goes on. I'm seriously considering trying the rhythm method in combination with condoms when it comes close to the fertile times of month. I feel like an idiot for thinking about that, knowing what the failure rates are, but I feel like there's just no option for me. :(
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby bluebambue » Wed Apr 25, 2012 3:44 pm UTC

Plasmic-Turtle wrote:blueambue where'd you get the mesh? A fabric shop? Or you tore up some old window screens? I've seen those things many a time but never felt the need to get one myself... until you pointed out the practicality of it. My earrings are all loose and tangled in a box somewhere - the ones that aren't in my purse or on my bedside table or lost elsewhere, that is! You have some cool earrings, too. Y'know, when I first read your message, I read 'aunt' as if it were in a strong American accent, and then I realised the issue was that you'd actually written 'ant'! :lol:
I actually stole the mesh from my mom, but I would guess either fabric shop or hardware store. Searching for "window screen mesh" on Amazon pulls up things in the home improvement section, so I think hardware store would be a better bet.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby meridian » Wed Apr 25, 2012 4:11 pm UTC

*hugs for PicSarah*
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby SecondTalon » Wed Apr 25, 2012 4:15 pm UTC

PictureSarah wrote:Now I don't know what to do. The pill made me gain a hideous amount of weight in a short amount of time. The depo made me suicidally depressed, and made me bleed for a month and a half at a time, among other things. The Paragard gave me incredibly bad cramps all month long, not just during sharkweek. Maybe I should try the Mirena, but I'm kind of afraid of progesterone-only options after the Depo. We've been using condoms, but honestly, our use has been less-than-perfect as time goes on. I'm seriously considering trying the rhythm method in combination with condoms when it comes close to the fertile times of month. I feel like an idiot for thinking about that, knowing what the failure rates are, but I feel like there's just no option for me. :(

In what's probably Terrible Advice Town, there's this study, the Rachel K. Jones one that's been floating about lately. Which just... just absolutely screams terrible advice and probably a good idea to wait for some sort of peer review.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby sophyturtle » Wed Apr 25, 2012 5:58 pm UTC

Super late, buy Yay Shirt Sewing!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Kithplana » Thu Apr 26, 2012 12:19 am UTC

Re: Yasmin, I was on it for a few months but felt it was having a negative effect on my mood. I'm pretty sure I gained weight on it, too. Switched to Ortho Tri-Cyclen after that, and my mood seemed better (or else I was just getting better at weathering the daily storms of BS from my ex, one of the two) but never lost the weight. Still haven't lost the weight after almost two years off BC, but since you're so active YMMV.

My choice when it comes time to get BC again will probably be the Paragard. IMO, non-hormonal BC FTW.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Ashlah » Thu Apr 26, 2012 12:42 am UTC

FWIW, I've been on the Pill for five years now (since I was 16). I lost weight when I started, but given the timing, it's hard to say whether it was directly attributable to the BC. That's around the time lots of people sprout up and lose weight. There's also the possibility that I had/have a very mild case of PCOS, in which case BC would make me lose weight as well. I've found it very easy to remember to take the it every day, but that's something you've got to ask yourself and be sure of. I like that I can easily track the timing of my periods, which isn't the case (well, not quite as easily) with leave-it-in-and-ignore-it types. But I definitely get the upside to those too.

One thing to remember is that for some people (as members here can attest) it takes trying out multiple types (multiple pills and other types of BC) to find the one that works for you. I had luck with the first Pill I was prescribed, but a couple years later, I started having breakthrough bleeding, so I switched to a slightly higher hormone level pill. A friend of mine got suicidally depressed on her first Pill, and had to switch.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Enuja » Thu Apr 26, 2012 1:16 am UTC

PictureSarah, it's quite possible that male condoms are your best bet, and they can be an excellent birth control method. No, they aren't the most effective, but going from a 5% chance of no pregnancy in a year to a 82% with the "typical use" of condoms is a huge improvement. You've tried a huge number of other methods, and you've got excellent reasons that they don't work for you. That doesn't mean you're doomed to have sub-standard method.

I suggest that you embrace condoms as your method, and work with your partner to use them every single time. Once you've done that for a while (and trust yourself and each other to continue to do so), then you can work on hybrid methods, like not using a condom during safe days with fertility tracking. Having a future of some non-condom sex, dependent upon using condoms correctly, will hopefully make it easier to move towards perfect use, instead of moving towards no birth control.

One combination of methods I liked was to use condoms most of the time, as the normal expectation, but to track my fertility, and on "safe" days, have the option of condom-less sex, but with no ejaculation while the penis is in the vagina, unless a condom goes on it first. That's a highly effective combination of methods, and it or a system somewhat like it, might work for you.

Right now I'm on the always-use-condoms plan, because I have multiple sex partners, and male condoms is my only current method of birth control. That means that even my partner with a vasectomy uses condoms every single time. And that works extremely well for both of us. In my experience, guys who really embrace the condom thing go ahead and find condoms that fit well and feel comfortable, and use them perfectly. And if they don't, they don't get to be my sex partner. I'm personally very comfortable with abortion as a back-up, esp. when my method (perfect use of condoms) gives me a less than 5% chance of needing the backup.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Hofstadter'sLaw » Thu Apr 26, 2012 3:27 am UTC

@ Apparently Anonymous: I’ve never been on birth control before, but was just prescribed Lo Loestrin Fe. It only has 10 micrograms of estrogen (the lowest dose available, apparently), and it looks like the Yasmin has 30 micrograms. Lower doses should have less unpleasant side effects, right? If the Yasmin doesn’t work out, maybe you could try the Lo Loestrin.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby Hyphe » Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:21 am UTC

@PIctureSarah: The Paragard is a brand name for a non-hormonal IUD, correct? I don't know if this is in any way relevant to your situation, but I have a non-hormonal IUD which gives me appallingly bad cramps and menstrual pains - after talking to several doctors who said there was nothing they could do but take it out, my current doctor has prescribed me mefenemic acid and it's helping a LOT with the pain. It feels a bit like swallowing a spider to catch the fly, but I too have frustratingly few options for birth control, so this is pretty much all I can do.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby semicharmed » Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:32 am UTC

Hyphe wrote:@PIctureSarah: The Paragard is a brand name for a non-hormonal IUD, correct? I don't know if this is in any way relevant to your situation, but I have a non-hormonal IUD which gives me appallingly bad cramps and menstrual pains - after talking to several doctors who said there was nothing they could do but take it out, my current doctor has prescribed me mefenemic acid and it's helping a LOT with the pain. It feels a bit like swallowing a spider to catch the fly, but I too have frustratingly few options for birth control, so this is pretty much all I can do.


The Paragard is the US brand for the copper coil type of IUD; non-hormonal.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby sophyturtle » Thu Apr 26, 2012 3:57 pm UTC

I have my copper little T, and I love it. So much that when it moved I had it instantly replaced with another one. I don't find the cramps are worse, but they seem to be low level and constant for a bit (of course, I also have a good amount of stress making things tight). Interestingly, shark week is more like one day of Niagara surrounded by a few days of spotting.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby semicharmed » Thu Apr 26, 2012 5:52 pm UTC

sophyturtle wrote:I have my copper little T, and I love it. So much that when it moved I had it instantly replaced with another one. I don't find the cramps are worse, but they seem to be low level and constant for a bit (of course, I also have a good amount of stress making things tight). Interestingly, shark week is more like one day of Niagara surrounded by a few days of spotting.


As do I, and more anecdata: if it's a crampy period, they're low-level but constant - I call them walk-around cramps, as opposed to the curled-up-in-fetal-position cramps I used to get in high school. And while the total volume hasn't changed, it's about a day of floodgates and some lovely uterine chunks (my divacup takes care of that nicely) and then a few days of not needing to empty to cup but 1x/day. I also hadn't had a super-crampy period in probably two years before I got the copper coil, and wasn't a super-heavy bleeder.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

Postby eaglewings51 » Thu Apr 26, 2012 6:57 pm UTC

I've heard that a lot of doctors won't fit you for an IUD if you're a virgin and if they do, it tends to be very painful and difficult if not impossible. Does anyone know if there's truth to that?


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