Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

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Jjarro
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Jjarro » Tue Apr 15, 2008 6:48 am UTC

Of course.

I'm more worried about how much nasty zombie virus I get exposed to with a close-in pistol headshot. If it's a lot, and the .22 does the job, maybe all other guns should be pretty much reserved for hunting/battling back the fuckers who also survived, but are being awful about it. The .22 would ideally punch one hole in the skull, expand, bounce around and destroy the brain. No mess, no fuss.

Even if they can't zombify me with their gore, HIV would be a concern for me. I mean, what post-apocalyptic badass doesn't have some scratches exposed?
A careful one, I guess. Lots of bandages.

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Maseiken » Tue Apr 15, 2008 1:08 pm UTC

Yuri2356 wrote:
Maseiken wrote:
AKAnotu wrote:
Maseiken wrote:Ideally, you'd want to not have to kill any Zombies.

Ideally, there won't BE any zombies.

Ideally, I'm in Kirby's Dreamland getting Free Blowjobs and Pudding.

Fix'd.

That was my original vision, I considered it too Risqué.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby wst » Tue Apr 15, 2008 6:16 pm UTC

Maseiken wrote:That was my original vision, I considered it too Risqué.

Yuo're talking to the guys who get their own 'xkcd-cut' of films, with all the extras you miss on the directors cut.

RE: AIDS. Another priority is getting loads of alcohol disinfectant and hazmat suits.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Manial » Tue Apr 15, 2008 7:40 pm UTC

Yuri2356 wrote:
Maseiken wrote:
AKAnotu wrote:
Maseiken wrote:Ideally, you'd want to not have to kill any Zombies.

Ideally, there won't BE any zombies.

Ideally, I'm in Kirby's Dreamland getting Free Blowjobs and Pudding.

Fix'd.

From Kirby?! Wouldn't that... hurt?


Anyway, I was thinking about this (zombies, not kirby sex) the other day, and I came up with: a Lighthouse!

Pros: Isolated, Ability to signal to other humans (although I guess a radio would work better), Single entrance, and High vantage points.

Cons: Lack of weapons/food/water/supplies (although if truly isolated, the prior inhabitant(s) might have some supplies), very few around (especially if you live away from the shore), and it's a possible target (the light may attract zombies).

It wouldn't be too bad of a safehouse, but probably not that useful either.

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby LE4dGOLEM » Tue Apr 15, 2008 8:15 pm UTC

Single entrance is also single exit is also single bad.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Azrael001 » Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:33 am UTC

I disagree about the single exit. If you are adequately prepared, you can have ropes at the top of the tower used to use as a zip cord rappel down. The zombies cannot climb up the rope, and you can use them as quick escapes. That being said, supplies would be limited, so it is probably not a good idea overall.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Beaniedude » Sat Apr 19, 2008 12:42 am UTC

I'm gonna go off on a massive tangent here.
First off i'ld like to say thankyou for all your help in preparing me for the upcoming zombie invasion...its given me a lot to think about
and Secondly i'ld just like to point out that I told my whole school about the invasion in one of our assemblies (yes i can't spell, hurrah)
I was meant to be talking about perserverance so i was talking about that Kenyan who still ran the marathon with a gall bladder infection then suddenly i just jumped to
"I guess when the questions you have to ask yourself is when the inevitable zombie invasion comes around..."
and started talking for 2 minutes on that subject of perservering through a zombie invasion...
...everyone was confused
it was brilliant
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Maseiken » Sat Apr 19, 2008 1:14 pm UTC

Beaniedude wrote:I'm gonna go off on a massive tangent here.
First off i'ld like to say thankyou for all your help in preparing me for the upcoming zombie invasion...its given me a lot to think about
and Secondly i'ld just like to point out that I told my whole school about the invasion in one of our assemblies (yes i can't spell, hurrah)
I was meant to be talking about perserverance so i was talking about that Kenyan who still ran the marathon with a gall bladder infection then suddenly i just jumped to
"I guess when the questions you have to ask yourself is when the inevitable zombie invasion comes around..."
and started talking for 2 minutes on that subject of perservering through a zombie invasion...
...everyone was confused
it was brilliant

YOU SIR... Just bought yourself an Aunt Gert!
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Beaniedude » Sun Apr 20, 2008 9:18 am UTC

Yes I finally have an Aunt Gert!...I always wanted one....to do stuff that you normally do with Aunt Gert's...like eating icecream :D
Which brings us to the topic of human sacrificies.
If given the oppertunity, would you sacrifice one of your members (maybe yourself) to kill 100 zombies? 200? 1000?
Myself....i probably wouldnt even if it was the most logical thing to do (yay for emotions) but if it was to end the zombie war then i think I wouldnt mind sacrificing myself/a random passerby
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby LE4dGOLEM » Sun Apr 20, 2008 2:06 pm UTC

You talking suicide bombs or "this person could only kill x zombies if they didn't have to worry about keeping themselves alive", where x is large?
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby ikkleste » Tue Apr 22, 2008 1:48 pm UTC

(1st Post, Hi)

Right, I've read the full thread thinking about this. And I've no idea what I would do!, I've put in no prep for the inevitable zombogeddon! I'm virtually screwed!

I'm gonna make some assumptions; that the plague starts in the night, so the first i find of it is when i get up and hear some sort of broadcast on the radio; and that my house will be secure until i make it not so (brickwork building, solid UPVC double glazing with drawn curtains).

Supplies:
My cupboards are poorly stocked at most times, with very few non-perishables in the house at all. My car parked outside has a varying amount of petrol in, i don't keep it either full nor empty. Worst case I'm running on fumes. It's a petrol so improvising isn't an option.

Weapons and armour:
No firearms, nor any idea where i would get one (potential zombtastrophe is making me reconsider my agreement with the UK's gun control laws, damnit they weren't thinking about the zombies). No really useful sports equipment, tools. No biking gear or similar. Looks like i'm improvising here.

Position/ situation:
I'm in a large town, near to the city centre. Right next to the road hub for the area. If i can get transport i can get out, should i choose so. I'd imagine I'd get 20 mins jump on a lot of people, due to a slightly early start workwise. The area i live in is pretty rough though, I'd imagine a lot of the people around locally would be quite prepared to kill you just to take your stuff, probably in a higher ration than a lot of other areas. This presents an immediate threat.

Presumably contact networks are still up for the time being. Contact my girlfriend, warn her, arrange for her to get her gear ready for me to pick her up. Contact my family, arrange to rendezvous with them. My bro should be handy, he's got some decent survival kit, and better survival knowlege than me. Find what is useful within the house. Sturdy, warm but movable clothes. FIK, tool kit, blankets/bedroll, torch and batteries (for as long as they'll last they'll be handy), Rucksack, whatever food is in, and whatever water i can get containers for. Improvise a weapon. Probably a chairleg club. Fortunately i think my chairs would be good for this purpose. Call the girlfriend again, make sure she's still there and ready for me to collect. Into the car, and go and get her.

Next target I'm unsure. Scout local shops but they've probably already been looted. We're gonna be short of food and water quickly. Town centre throws up no resourses. The mall is undefendable, though reasonably resourced, it'd be a nightmare to make safe if the zombs were already in. The hospital will be flooded with people and is horrific to get to, just a bad idea. Out of town shops I'd imagine will be looter-tastic. I'd guess the airport and docks will be shutdown already in an attempt to contain things. That's even if i can get anywhere by car, the place is likely gridlocked by now.

Unfortunately, Britain isn't good for seclusion. Even in the moors, you'll see people drive by every couple of mins, and that's when there isn't a mass exodus.

So i dunno, maybe my girlfriend and family might have a better idea. I'm out. As i say with no defence, very little resources, and little idea of where to go, nor way to get there, I'm pretty screwed from the start. I'm also clearly making mistakes, that i know I'm making; taking the car, rescuing the girlfriend. But it's all I've got. If I'm going down to the zombie plague i might as well try and meet up with the most important people to me first.

So a challenge:
Given my appauling preparation, and the fact i live in a city/town that's more of a threat than a resource, in a country/area of the country where virtually nowhere is remote, give me some hope, some clues of what i can do to survive the Zombfest.

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby 22/7 » Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:02 pm UTC

ikkleste, your position isn't quite as tenuous as you might imagine. The most important things for you (once you find out, of course) would be procurement of weaponry, food and shelter. It sounds like your house wouldn't work particularly well, so you'll have to find somewhere else. However, your location makes it more acceptable that you don't have weapons or food supplies ready. Since you're in a city (close to the center?), you can pretty much go loot whatever you'll need (assuming it hasn't been looted already). The flip side to this is that you'll also be in a higher concentration of zombies, so keep your wits about you. Assuming they are slow zombies, your brain is your most useful weapon/defense.
Totally not a hypothetical...

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby ikkleste » Tue Apr 22, 2008 11:23 pm UTC

hmm... My worry with staying central (I live 10 mins walk from the centre of a large town/small city) is how competitive I can be against other more cut-throat ruthless looters. I'd like to believe in a bit of blitz spirit, and if this showed through, and survivors were willing to team together for each others good, I'd feel a lot better. My hunch is, however, most people round here would view others as competition.

I think I could cope perhaps with the actual zombies at least well enough to get myself to some sort of destination (once I decide where) and gather the resources needed for survival or hole up if there's a chance of medium term rescue. However if there's competition for such resources/holing up places. I'm not sure how well I could cut it when frontier values are prevalent.

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby tokara2132 » Wed Apr 23, 2008 7:17 am UTC

Hmmm...you know, several buddies of mine and I have actually discussed this numerous times. Any time "Shawn of the Dead", "Silent Hill", and "The Hills have Eyes" (I know, NOT a zombie movie, but a lot of the strategies for survival would be similar to a bunch of radiation mutated freaks) and we seem to have come up with some easy ways to defend ourselves in a zombie attack.

1) There's no need for heavy armor. Sure, you worry about bites, but there is one thing that is overlooked: the zombies are still physically human. That means that whatever a human can't bite through a zombie won't be able to bite through. Instead of some thick and cumbersome as shark armor, simply wrapping vulnerable appendages in hockey tape will keep most zombie bites away and keeping possible infection-ridden blood from coming into contact with your skin.

2) In the case of weapons, simplicity is the best policy. There are several hatchets available that have a hammer end on the back side and can serve as not only multi-purpose tool but also weapon. If need be, a melee weapon such as a trench knife is useful, especially when combined with hockey tape. In addition, its just as useful as a normal knife anyway (unless you get a trench spike, but that is limited). In terms of firepower, .22 rifles would most likely be your best bet. However, training with these weapons are far more important than simply carting them around.

3) If long term survival is necessary, get to know a large area, preferably semi-isolated, as your main points of survival. Scatter some growing crops (ala I Am Legend) around the whole area, moving as often as possible during the day. While the crops are growing, create and maintain a "Safe Zone" and booby trap it as best possible. If there is enough time and immediate survival is guarenteed, set up a small post and keep a look out, especially if there is more than one survivor and it is a small community. Stay as needed.

I know I'm forgetting some of the things from the discussions of my friends and I.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Chrismclegless » Tue Apr 29, 2008 10:26 am UTC

tokara2132 wrote:1) There's no need for heavy armor. Sure, you worry about bites, but there is one thing that is overlooked: the zombies are still physically human. That means that whatever a human can't bite through a zombie won't be able to bite through. Instead of some thick and cumbersome as shark armor, simply wrapping vulnerable appendages in hockey tape will keep most zombie bites away and keeping possible infection-ridden blood from coming into contact with your skin.



See, I'm not sure about this. I think it's risky to assume the zombies won't be stronger than normal humans, or at least souped up in some way, like humans on adrenaline. I think thick padded clothes would be best, easily portable and giving you some form of defence. Either that or very little, hoping to be as unencumbered as possible so as to avoid the bites.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Firnagzen » Tue Apr 29, 2008 11:04 am UTC

tokara2132 wrote:1) There's no need for heavy armor. Sure, you worry about bites, but there is one thing that is overlooked: the zombies are still physically human. That means that whatever a human can't bite through a zombie won't be able to bite through. Instead of some thick and cumbersome as shark armor, simply wrapping vulnerable appendages in hockey tape will keep most zombie bites away and keeping possible infection-ridden blood from coming into contact with your skin.


Well... I'm afraid I have to disagree. The human body has limits, but we never exploit the full limits. Pain is the limiting factor, but zombies can ignore that. They can bite till their teeth break and they don't care. They can tear their arms off and beat you to death with them.

Besides. If it's some viral style infection, what's to say the virus doesn't improve them somehow, ala Spatterjay series by Neal Asher. (Not zombies, but pretty cool concept behind it.)

Or even the old voodoo magic style zombies, hmm? Magic is magic. What's to say superhumanzombie strenght isn't part of it?
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Maseiken » Tue Apr 29, 2008 11:43 am UTC

Yeah, the Human jaw is more than enough to go right into your flesh, and all you need is to get scratched, not even necessarily by their teeth...
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Gojoe » Sat May 03, 2008 4:04 pm UTC

I think that this was prob already in this post ( i saw a little bit of discussion about zombie bugs )
http://www.qwantz.com/archive/001011.html
The only problem is how they would contract the zombie disease. If you bite a zombie do you become one? Is it their blood what gives you the urge to eat people? Or is it more like a vampire, they have to bite you?
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby 22/7 » Sat May 03, 2008 7:05 pm UTC

Firnagzen wrote:Well... I'm afraid I have to disagree. The human body has limits, but we never exploit the full limits. Pain is the limiting factor, but zombies can ignore that. They can bite till their teeth break and they don't care. They can tear their arms off and beat you to death with them.
Except that, supposedly, you'll be able to stay far enough away to keep that kind of thing at bay. You're basically putting all your eggs in a really good basket this way. Also, why would a zombie rip its own arm off? It would actually have to think, "hey, I could use my arm as a club if I ripped it off." I don't buy that they would do that. I don't buy that they'd use any tools at all.

Firnagzen wrote:Besides. If it's some viral style infection, what's to say the virus doesn't improve them somehow, ala Spatterjay series by Neal Asher. (Not zombies, but pretty cool concept behind it.)
Yeah.... how many viruses do you know that make the human body "better" in some way? I don't think that's how disease in general works.
Totally not a hypothetical...

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Neuman » Sat May 03, 2008 11:20 pm UTC

How many viruses do you know that reanimate their victims as shambling hordes of the undead?

Also, it's simple natural selection. Strains of the virus that made their victims harder, better, faster, stronger, or more resistant to decay would, on average, spread faster and further.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby singularapathy » Sat May 03, 2008 11:23 pm UTC

The answer to all of these is as follows:

Halo CE Pistol. Lots of ammo. Done and done.

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Firnagzen » Sun May 04, 2008 2:53 am UTC

22/7 wrote:
Firnagzen wrote:Well... I'm afraid I have to disagree. The human body has limits, but we never exploit the full limits. Pain is the limiting factor, but zombies can ignore that. They can bite till their teeth break and they don't care. They can tear their arms off and beat you to death with them.
Except that, supposedly, you'll be able to stay far enough away to keep that kind of thing at bay. You're basically putting all your eggs in a really good basket this way. Also, why would a zombie rip its own arm off? It would actually have to think, "hey, I could use my arm as a club if I ripped it off." I don't buy that they would do that. I don't buy that they'd use any tools at all.


I'm just giving that as a rather absurd exmaple that was supposed to pass for humor, to emphasize the fact that they don't feel pain.

EDIT: Oh, right. It may be possible for them to run faster than you. Only problem is that if they run, bits will start dropping off. So you just have to run till their heads fall off...

Neuman wrote:How many viruses do you know that reanimate their victims as shambling hordes of the undead?

Also, it's simple unnatural selection. Strains of the virus that made their victims harder, better, faster, stronger, or more resistant to decay would, on average, spread faster and further.


Corrected. Also, the word 'harder'... Um.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Gojoe » Sun May 04, 2008 6:34 pm UTC

I think a key thing that is often over looked when preparing for the inevitable zombie outbreak is surveillance. A good surveillance system can alert you to make your get away, or it could allow you to set off remote booby traps at the right time. Also... a tunnel system is a good backup, just make damn sure the zombies don't make it in.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby 22/7 » Mon May 05, 2008 6:34 pm UTC

Neuman wrote:How many viruses do you know that reanimate their victims as shambling hordes of the undead?

Also, it's simple natural selection. Strains of the virus that made their victims harder, better, faster, stronger, or more resistant to decay would, on average, spread faster and further.

Well, it's a matter of how realistic you're going to be in your preparation for an eventual zombie apocalypse. You can't simply assume that since we know this new virus does x which we haven't seen before, it'll also do y, which we haven't seen before. It's a neat idea for science fiction, but not particularly useful if you're seriously looking at the topic at hand.
Totally not a hypothetical...

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Azrael001 » Mon May 05, 2008 10:01 pm UTC

I disagree. There exists a fungus(?) in the South American rain forest which infects insects and takes over their bodies. Currently the bodies are only used to bring the now growing spore into the sun. I don't think that it can yet gain control of "higher" life forms, but it can get very large bugs.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Chrismclegless » Tue May 06, 2008 12:07 am UTC

It's only a matter of time before it evolves to be able to take over larger creatures.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Azrael001 » Tue May 06, 2008 12:14 am UTC

Exactly. Then we are doomed.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby 22/7 » Tue May 06, 2008 8:33 am UTC

Azrael001 wrote:I disagree. There exists a fungus(?) in the South American rain forest which infects insects and takes over their bodies. Currently the bodies are only used to bring the now growing spore into the sun. I don't think that it can yet gain control of "higher" life forms, but it can get very large bugs.

But does it grant them super abilities? Are they faster? Stronger? Smarter? Does it even make them go all ape-shit and fly as fast as they possibly can all the time? This is the issue I have with the "fast zombies" scenario.
Totally not a hypothetical...

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby CogDissident » Tue May 06, 2008 3:05 pm UTC

(doubleposted, apologies)
Last edited by CogDissident on Fri May 09, 2008 7:28 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby CogDissident » Tue May 06, 2008 3:05 pm UTC

LoopQuantumGravity wrote:Other than that, I've always thought an offshore oil rig would be a good place to stay. They can withstand hurricanes, are far enough above the water to prevent swimming zombies from getting you, plenty of water if you can desalinate, plenty of fuel, plenty of fish to eat, easy to defend if you can get ahold of some big weaponry, you could trade your oil with passing ships for equipment. What could be better?


You know, desalinating is a lot easier than most people think. Get two buckets, and one slanted piece of glass. Put one bucket on a higher elevation than the other, and tape up any air-holes. Leave it in the sun. The water in the bottom bucket will evaporate, and will travel upwards to the piece of glass (and condense), which will then travel slanted down to the upper bucket, and drip in. Make sure you black-out the back of the glass above the upper bucket, so water doesn't evaporate out of it.

ascii pic:

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|UX|

bottom = salt water
top = clean water
(needs to be air-insulated on all sides, if possible, as evidenced by verticle lines)
Granted, its semi-complicated to set up, but can be done with two buckets, some duct-tape, and a sheet of glass. Making it easy to construct almost anywhere.

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby nsmjohn » Tue May 06, 2008 4:40 pm UTC

I was talking to Neris about this last night. We both thought that we should get everyone together and combine our resources to build a fortified mountain complex just in case.

So far what we have in mind is finding some suitable land in Alaska, and starting a series of segmented underground vaults. Build it in a mountainous area and make sure the only entrance (easier defense) has good visibility. The entrance must be surrounded by a sturdy electrified fence. Have the pathway from the entrance lead down into the main vault. This would be the community area and main hub for all the other vaults. Have one (or more) vaults dedicated to entertainment with a full library, theatre, arcade, anything else you could want (we may be stuck in there a long time {i.e. eternity} and it wouldn't serve to have people go stir crazy). Also off the main hub would be the armory, agriculture, and livestock vaults (we would probably want multiple agriculture and livestock vaults). Interconnecting with the main vault and auxiliary vaults would be the housing vaults which, ideally, would have enough room to give each person/couple/family their own small apartment (obviously large enough for their size needs).

Now, the reasoning behind having each vault or main area segmented from every other is that if there were an outbreak or rebellion in one of the vaults it could be sealed off from the rest of the vaults. This would allow the vault to be "reclaimed" once we were prepared. There obviously technical issues like ventilation and power but the main concern is security and organization. Arranging a suitable way to make decisions that appease everyone would be incredibly important.

There are two very big concerns that we weren't able to address (besides monetary constraints): What do we do if we lose control of the main vault and how do we get everyone to the complex on short notice?

So, any thoughts?
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Neris » Tue May 06, 2008 5:02 pm UTC

Why is this in gaming? This is serious business people!
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Spuddly » Tue May 06, 2008 9:33 pm UTC

22/7 wrote:
Azrael001 wrote:I disagree. There exists a fungus(?) in the South American rain forest which infects insects and takes over their bodies. Currently the bodies are only used to bring the now growing spore into the sun. I don't think that it can yet gain control of "higher" life forms, but it can get very large bugs.

But does it grant them super abilities? Are they faster? Stronger? Smarter? Does it even make them go all ape-shit and fly as fast as they possibly can all the time? This is the issue I have with the "fast zombies" scenario.


The human body is capable of breaking its own bones. We just happen to have a bunch of feedback and stuff that tells us not to hurt ourselves. This is because breaking our bones lifting heavy things, is, in most cases, maladaptive. Zombification may simply remove these feedback mechanisms, making it so that the zombie, while not necessarily stronger, simply has access to the full power of the human body, though causing lots of damage to itself in doing so. Adrenaline, alcohol or cocaine can let people do some really amazing stuff, because they can't feel their hand bones shatter.

The biggest problem with zombies, especially the fast kind, is oxidative. How do you get O2 to all those tissues? You can't have a fast zombie without a circulatory system. And circulatory systems are easy to damage, which means a damaged fast zombie will bleed to death, or at least, nonfunctionality. Then there's the problem with necrosis due to bacterial invasion. If zombism is non-magical, fast zombies would have to still be alive to stay fast, unless the infection could somehow rework the body entirely (see T-Virus). Unless they were infected with nanobots that rebuilt their bodies to be more durable and find away around the circulatory system.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby 22/7 » Thu May 08, 2008 8:03 pm UTC

Spuddly wrote:The human body is capable of breaking its own bones. We just happen to have a bunch of feedback and stuff that tells us not to hurt ourselves. This is because breaking our bones lifting heavy things, is, in most cases, maladaptive. Zombification may simply remove these feedback mechanisms, making it so that the zombie, while not necessarily stronger, simply has access to the full power of the human body, though causing lots of damage to itself in doing so. Adrenaline, alcohol or cocaine can let people do some really amazing stuff, because they can't feel their hand bones shatter.

The biggest problem with zombies, especially the fast kind, is oxidative. How do you get O2 to all those tissues? You can't have a fast zombie without a circulatory system. And circulatory systems are easy to damage, which means a damaged fast zombie will bleed to death, or at least, nonfunctionality. Then there's the problem with necrosis due to bacterial invasion. If zombism is non-magical, fast zombies would have to still be alive to stay fast, unless the infection could somehow rework the body entirely (see T-Virus). Unless they were infected with nanobots that rebuilt their bodies to be more durable and find away around the circulatory system.

Sure, you can run crazy fast, but for how long? The fast zombies from the movies are unrealistic because of the way that the body makes you run really fast. How much adrenaline would you have to be able to produce in order to run that fast multiple times in the same day? And what nutrients does adrenaline require to manufacture? Where are they coming from? Even if you ignore the oxygen needs (which shouldn't be ignored, it's probably the main reason zombies will never spring up all around us), you've got to get the adrenaline made, then use it, then get rid of the waste. I'm no biologist, but I would assume that all this is going to be working at a deficit pretty much instantaneously, and those torn muscles that you're going to create by constantly running really fast aren't going to rebuild themselves, so every time they do run really fast, they're making it such that they won't be able to do it as fast next time.
Totally not a hypothetical...

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Azrael001 » Thu May 08, 2008 11:16 pm UTC

That could explain how the infection spreads quickly, also it might explain the hunger for brains. A few slow zombies will be much harder pressed to spread an infection quickly, whereas the fast ones could. The brain is what controls (produces?) most hormones, the pituitary gland could be what the zombies are after.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby 22/7 » Fri May 09, 2008 5:53 am UTC

Azrael001 wrote:That could explain how the infection spreads quickly, also it might explain the hunger for brains. A few slow zombies will be much harder pressed to spread an infection quickly, whereas the fast ones could. The brain is what controls (produces?) most hormones, the pituitary gland could be what the zombies are after.

Sure, but think about how that's going to turn out. You're going to have an infection spread very quickly (because the zombies are moving so quickly) but they're also going to become basically worthless for running (maybe even walking) by, what, 5 minutes in? Less? I mean, adrenaline, while allowing us to do very, very impressive things, also does serious damage to our bodies. We need that pain to keep us from doing really stupid things (like tearing all the muscles in our legs to shit by running at top speed all the time). If you could run as fast as, say, an olympic sprinter, but you could do it for a quarter mile or even a mile, when you got done, the muscles in your legs would be torn to shit, probably actually ripped. So even if we assume that a zombie somehow runs on adrenaline, he's only going to have an extremely finite amount of it (so he'll only be able to run all-out for something on the order of 10-20 seconds, probably closer to 10). And if we assume that somehow his body will start scavenging itself to produce more (something the virus does), he'll have completely blown through his own legs in the first few minutes of that running. So the "siege scenario" seen in Dawn of the Dead is completely unsupportable. All the zombies would have annihilated themselves in the first 10 or so minutes of being a zombie while they chased living things around, leaving a bunch of corpses (possibly) pulling themselves around army-crawl style. Not only would the flesh be decomposing and the body falling apart, they'd completely lose the ability to effectively propel themselves, making them basically harmless unless you're walking around in sandals and not looking out for crawling zombies.
Totally not a hypothetical...

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby aleflamedyud » Fri May 09, 2008 6:16 am UTC

Unless the zombies can use the living flesh they eat to regenerate their damaged tissues.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Maseiken » Fri May 09, 2008 6:52 am UTC

aleflamedyud wrote:Unless the zombies can use the living flesh they eat to regenerate their damaged tissues.

Which they can't.
Because they have no functioning metabolism.
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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby 22/7 » Fri May 09, 2008 6:54 am UTC

aleflamedyud wrote:Unless the zombies can use the living flesh they eat to regenerate their damaged tissues.

So basically if the zombie can find someone in that first 5 minutes to eat, they'll be ok for another 5 minutes (assuming they can regenerate instantaneously while eating). Either way, they're not a long term threat. Slow moving ones I can see, but not fast ones (though we're still ignoring the fact that their bodies won't be able to get rid of waste products that will build up in the muscles).
Totally not a hypothetical...

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Re: Taking it seriously: The zombie problem

Postby Gunfingers » Fri May 09, 2008 1:12 pm UTC

You're assuming that whatever makes zombies zombies does nothing to their body except necrotize it. How do we know this 'virus' doesn't build the muscles up?

Not to mention any 'fast' zombies are probably 28 Days Later style zombies, meaning they're not really reanimated dead, but rather living humans with damaged brains.

Appropriate reading.

That article also mentions the possibility of nanites being used to create zombies. I now know how i'm going to take over the world.


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