The worst film you've seen

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folkhero
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby folkhero » Thu Jul 12, 2012 10:22 pm UTC

In my memory, the first live action Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was good. I don't think I should risk re-watching it to see if I was right.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Jorpho » Fri Jul 13, 2012 2:39 am UTC

CorruptUser wrote:Has there been a cartoon/anime show that produced a good live-action movie? Ever?
Apparently everyone quite likes the live-action version of Nodame Cantabile, but I guess that was technically based on a manga. So was Death Note, for that matter.

So, Cutie Honey, maybe? It was Different, at least.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Oryx » Sat Aug 11, 2012 12:56 pm UTC

Clash of the titans was the worst movie i think i've ever seen.
I could not think it was possible to fail on so many levels: costumes, special effects, dialogues....
All of the characters were shallow (especially sam worthington), the story was non-existent; it was a complete disaster.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby UniqueScreenname » Wed Aug 15, 2012 2:37 am UTC

All that build-up to the Kraken and the entire scene was two minutes. So disappointing. However, I did get a good song from the commercials, so its existence is not for naught.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby emceng » Wed Aug 15, 2012 12:43 pm UTC

Oryx wrote:Clash of the titans was the worst movie i think i've ever seen.
I could not think it was possible to fail on so many levels: costumes, special effects, dialogues....
All of the characters were shallow (especially sam worthington), the story was non-existent; it was a complete disaster.



Hah, saw this thread pop up again in my egosearch, and immediately thought "I should mention CotT. It was terrible."
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby zmic » Thu Aug 16, 2012 10:41 pm UTC

Oryx wrote:Clash of the titans was the worst movie i think i've ever seen.
I could not think it was possible to fail on so many levels: costumes, special effects, dialogues....
All of the characters were shallow (especially sam worthington), the story was non-existent; it was a complete disaster.


I suppose you haven't seen Wrath of the Titans then? It's at least twice as bad.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Laserdan » Fri Aug 17, 2012 11:11 am UTC

I've seen Shrooms recently. Horrible, horrible movie.

The worst thing is that one of the protagonists senses the future, meaning we are treated to seeing every goddamn scene twice after about the 20 minute mark. And the first 20 minutes are completely pointless.

Also, a multi-minute long still scene where three girls are talking about forgetting tampons, and nothing even remotely related to that scene ever comes up again. Worst implementation of the red herring trope ever.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby PeteP » Fri Aug 17, 2012 9:55 pm UTC

There is a movie named fantasy mission force, the german trailer states that Jackie Chan is the lead, but he only appears for 20 min or so (The trailer is funny after watching the movie, for one it's full of lies butit also contains scenes which aren't in the german version.)
The movie is quite bad, but in the german version 17 min or so were removed. And the cuts lead to some weird jumps. I don't want to see it ever again, but it was quite funny.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Oryx » Sun Aug 19, 2012 8:59 pm UTC

zmic wrote:
Oryx wrote:Clash of the titans was the worst movie i think i've ever seen.
I could not think it was possible to fail on so many levels: costumes, special effects, dialogues....
All of the characters were shallow (especially sam worthington), the story was non-existent; it was a complete disaster.


I suppose you haven't seen Wrath of the Titans then? It's at least twice as bad.


I plan to watch it pretty soon, just to see if they actually managed to make something even worst (maybe zeus riding a pony in his sparkling armor), but to be honest i doubt that anything can actually be "twice as bad" as clash of the titans...

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby zmic » Mon Aug 20, 2012 5:39 pm UTC

Oryx wrote:
zmic wrote:
Oryx wrote:Clash of the titans was the worst movie i think i've ever seen.
I could not think it was possible to fail on so many levels: costumes, special effects, dialogues....
All of the characters were shallow (especially sam worthington), the story was non-existent; it was a complete disaster.


I suppose you haven't seen Wrath of the Titans then? It's at least twice as bad.


I plan to watch it pretty soon, just to see if they actually managed to make something even worst (maybe zeus riding a pony in his sparkling armor), but to be honest i doubt that anything can actually be "twice as bad" as clash of the titans...


as opposed to Cott it pretended to be more than just a popcorn movie -- Neeson took the role of Zeus way too seriously, as if he wanted to do Hamlet or something -- plus there were no boobies.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Zarq » Tue Aug 21, 2012 6:08 am UTC

zmic wrote:
Oryx wrote:
zmic wrote:
Oryx wrote:Clash of the titans was the worst movie i think i've ever seen.
I could not think it was possible to fail on so many levels: costumes, special effects, dialogues....
All of the characters were shallow (especially sam worthington), the story was non-existent; it was a complete disaster.


I suppose you haven't seen Wrath of the Titans then? It's at least twice as bad.


I plan to watch it pretty soon, just to see if they actually managed to make something even worst (maybe zeus riding a pony in his sparkling armor), but to be honest i doubt that anything can actually be "twice as bad" as clash of the titans...


as opposed to Cott it pretended to be more than just a popcorn movie -- Neeson took the role of Zeus way too seriously, as if he wanted to do Hamlet or something -- plus there were no boobies.


I don't seem to remember any boobs in CotT, so I'm not sure if that works as an argument.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby AvatarIII » Tue Aug 21, 2012 10:26 am UTC

Oryx wrote:
zmic wrote:
Oryx wrote:Clash of the titans was the worst movie i think i've ever seen.
I could not think it was possible to fail on so many levels: costumes, special effects, dialogues....
All of the characters were shallow (especially sam worthington), the story was non-existent; it was a complete disaster.


I suppose you haven't seen Wrath of the Titans then? It's at least twice as bad.


I plan to watch it pretty soon, just to see if they actually managed to make something even worst (maybe zeus riding a pony in his sparkling armor), but to be honest i doubt that anything can actually be "twice as bad" as clash of the titans...


I don't think he has the Sparkly armour in WotT
But I will say that Clash and Wrath of the titans are both stunning cinema compared to In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, starring Jason Statham, Ray Liotta et. al, directed by the one and only Uwe Boll, which was beyond dire. And by extension, although I haven't seen it, the sequel, starring Dolph Lundgren, must be just as bad, or worse, it does in fact have a lower rating on IMdB, 3.8/10 for the first movie only 3.2/10 for the second, whereas the Titans movies have a semi-respectable-in-comparison 5.8/10 and 5.9/10 respectively.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby quantumcat42 » Tue Aug 21, 2012 4:39 pm UTC

Worst movie I've ever seen was the 1972 Piranha. It so thoroughly failed to meet the very lowest of expectations. That is, when I watch a movie called "Piranha", I expect some piranha. Perhaps even gruesome piranha destruction, but at the very least it should feature some of the little guys. There is one close shot of a piranha at the beginning. It is then ~50 minutes before the word "piranha" is even mentioned. Toward the end of the movie, one character is, indeed, eaten by piranha -- not killed by piranha, only eaten after already being dispatched by other means, so the fact that there are piranha involved is entirely irrelevant.

Alternate titles which would better represent the viewing experience would be "Long Sequences of Wildlife Shots Related To Neither The Plot Nor Piranha", or "William Smith's Hearty Laughter" (as simply listening to one of these outbursts will cause your chest to sprout a luscious covering of manhair).

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby The Scyphozoa » Tue Aug 21, 2012 4:48 pm UTC

Well... sounds like it's worth watching anyway.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby quantumcat42 » Tue Aug 21, 2012 5:28 pm UTC

The Scyphozoa wrote:Well... sounds like it's worth watching anyway.

As a screensaver, maybe.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby mosc » Tue Aug 21, 2012 5:30 pm UTC

AvatarIII wrote:I don't think he has the Sparkly armour in WotT
But I will say that Clash and Wrath of the titans are both stunning cinema compared to In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, starring Jason Statham, Ray Liotta et. al, directed by the one and only Uwe Boll, which was beyond dire. And by extension, although I haven't seen it, the sequel, starring Dolph Lundgren, must be just as bad, or worse, it does in fact have a lower rating on IMdB, 3.8/10 for the first movie only 3.2/10 for the second, whereas the Titans movies have a semi-respectable-in-comparison 5.8/10 and 5.9/10 respectively.

I lost all faith in those numbers when the poastman got like 5 stars or somesuch. Seriously, those people can go to hell.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby AvatarIII » Tue Aug 21, 2012 6:09 pm UTC

mosc wrote:
AvatarIII wrote:I don't think he has the Sparkly armour in WotT
But I will say that Clash and Wrath of the titans are both stunning cinema compared to In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, starring Jason Statham, Ray Liotta et. al, directed by the one and only Uwe Boll, which was beyond dire. And by extension, although I haven't seen it, the sequel, starring Dolph Lundgren, must be just as bad, or worse, it does in fact have a lower rating on IMdB, 3.8/10 for the first movie only 3.2/10 for the second, whereas the Titans movies have a semi-respectable-in-comparison 5.8/10 and 5.9/10 respectively.

I lost all faith in those numbers when the poastman got like 5 stars or somesuch. Seriously, those people can go to hell.


Well all they can tell you is how the general public like a movie, not how you will like a movie.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby CorruptUser » Sun Aug 26, 2012 5:31 pm UTC

Don't know if anyone posted this yet, but "National Security". It's a buddy-buddy cop film, with a thoroughly unlikable co-protagonist. If you were to ask the klan to direct a film, they'd come out with something like this. It's, just, ugh. The point of the film appears to be that police brutality is actually brought on by stupid black people, and that said stupid black people are incredibly racist going so far as to "oppose interracial dating- when the man is white". Also stupid black people will ruin your life, constantly harass you, and be treated as the hero in spite of everything. I want to hunt Martin Lawrence down and punch him in the face for this movie.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby IcedT » Mon Aug 27, 2012 7:15 pm UTC

CorruptUser wrote:Don't know if anyone posted this yet, but "National Security". It's a buddy-buddy cop film, with a thoroughly unlikable co-protagonist. If you were to ask the klan to direct a film, they'd come out with something like this. It's, just, ugh. The point of the film appears to be that police brutality is actually brought on by stupid black people, and that said stupid black people are incredibly racist going so far as to "oppose interracial dating- when the man is white". Also stupid black people will ruin your life, constantly harass you, and be treated as the hero in spite of everything. I want to hunt Martin Lawrence down and punch him in the face for this movie.

I rented that movie years ago, and my little brother played it FOUR TIMES IN ONE DAY. I wanted to choke the little bastard.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Woopate » Wed Aug 29, 2012 6:22 am UTC

I just recently saw a screening of "The Room" which, as Wikipedia states in the first paragraph, is supposedly the Citizen Kane of bad movies. When I got to the theatre, they handed me a sheet of rules, things I was supposed to do during the movie. This included throwing plastic spoons(provided) at the screen whenever a spoon was visible on camera, and shouting "because your a woman" whenever a female character said something outright mysoginistic (many times).

And... Well, it lived up to the hype. Were it not for the audience interaction and a significant amount of alcohol, it would have been eye gougingly bad. Numerous plot holes, recurring characters with no purpose, extended camera shots with talking character's faces cut off by the side of the screen, recycled sex scenes, Randomly dropping in and out of focus, and a main character (also director, writer, producer, and presumably running the publishing company since it bears his name) who rushed his EVERY LINE.

After I got home, I had plans for what I was going to do with the rest of my night, but my brain couldn't even anything, so I went to bed lost amd confused.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Zarq » Wed Aug 29, 2012 12:35 pm UTC

Woopate wrote:I just recently saw a screening of "The Room" which, as Wikipedia states in the first paragraph, is supposedly the Citizen Kane of bad movies. When I got to the theatre, they handed me a sheet of rules, things I was supposed to do during the movie. This included throwing plastic spoons(provided) at the screen whenever a spoon was visible on camera, and shouting "because your a woman" whenever a female character said something outright mysoginistic (many times).

And... Well, it lived up to the hype. Were it not for the audience interaction and a significant amount of alcohol, it would have been eye gougingly bad. Numerous plot holes, recurring characters with no purpose, extended camera shots with talking character's faces cut off by the side of the screen, recycled sex scenes, Randomly dropping in and out of focus, and a main character (also director, writer, producer, and presumably running the publishing company since it bears his name) who rushed his EVERY LINE.

After I got home, I had plans for what I was going to do with the rest of my night, but my brain couldn't even anything, so I went to bed lost amd confused.


YOU'RE TEARING ME APART WOOPATE!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Woopate » Wed Aug 29, 2012 12:41 pm UTC

But I don't love him. And I'm pregnant.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby emceng » Wed Aug 29, 2012 1:24 pm UTC

Finally saw Manos, during a RiffTrax Live. Manos by itself would have been terrible. With RiffTrax? Hilarious.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Jorpho » Wed Aug 29, 2012 1:43 pm UTC

Woopate wrote:so I went to bed lost amd confused.
If you wish to explore these emotions further, you should seek out the Flash game tribute.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby quantumcat42 » Wed Aug 29, 2012 4:16 pm UTC

Woopate wrote:I went to bed lost amd confused.

Because you're a woman.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby UniqueScreenname » Thu Aug 30, 2012 1:03 am UTC

Woopate wrote:I just recently saw a screening of "The Room" which, as Wikipedia states in the first paragraph, is supposedly the Citizen Kane of bad movies. When I got to the theatre, they handed me a sheet of rules, things I was supposed to do during the movie. This included throwing plastic spoons(provided) at the screen whenever a spoon was visible on camera, and shouting "because your a woman" whenever a female character said something outright mysoginistic (many times).

And... Well, it lived up to the hype. Were it not for the audience interaction and a significant amount of alcohol, it would have been eye gougingly bad. Numerous plot holes, recurring characters with no purpose, extended camera shots with talking character's faces cut off by the side of the screen, recycled sex scenes, Randomly dropping in and out of focus, and a main character (also director, writer, producer, and presumably running the publishing company since it bears his name) who rushed his EVERY LINE.

After I got home, I had plans for what I was going to do with the rest of my night, but my brain couldn't even anything, so I went to bed lost amd confused.

Mystery Science Theatre 3000 belongs in this thread, and this reminds me of it a lot.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Laserdan » Fri Aug 31, 2012 6:40 am UTC

Well, The Room isn't bad. It's social commentary on how superficial we all are and how we are all bad actors in hiding our emotions, so this movie basically goes one level deeper into reality itself.

In all seriousness, read the wiki article about the movie. The dude may look strange and act strange, but the story how The Room was made is legitimately awesome.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby raudorn » Sat Sep 08, 2012 10:09 pm UTC

The Arrival is pretty high on my list. Everytime it was on TV me and a friend sat down with a bowl of snacks, started watching the movie and soon started an eating contest just so the bowl was empty and we could legitimately turn off the TV. (That thrice occuring "tradition" started with the first complete watching, where the bowl of snacks was the only thing between us and insanity). There's actually a second part but I simply couldn't stand watching more than the first few scenes, so I'm not sure just how bad the sequel really is.

Edit: Oh, I also have a copy of "Heart of the Warrior" but that movie seems like quite well done trash. Or the producers were stoned. Or something. It's not "so bad it's good", it's "so bad, it's weird as potato -§5 ftaghn naranana"

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Jorpho » Sun Sep 09, 2012 12:41 am UTC

I rather liked The Arrival, actually.It's definitely not your typical invasion pic. The sequel sort of felt more like a pilot for a TV series. (Wasn't there a TV series in the end?)

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby EvanED » Tue Sep 11, 2012 4:33 pm UTC

I'm not sure it deserves a place quite as high (low?) as a couple of the other things you've mentioned, but I'd just like to put in a vote for Superman 4. (IMDB: 3.6/10) That move was.. wow. It was atrocious even in comparison to Superman 3, which was bad even in comparison to 1&2, which aren't exactly stellar examples of cinematography (though #1 does have some strange nostalgic place in my heart).

Also, the Secret of Nimh movie; I know a lot of people like it (7.4 on IMDB) and it does have some nice animation, but I nominate it only because it was one of my favorite books around 4th grade and They Changed It (warning: tvtropes), including making it stupid and killing off my favorite character.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby emceng » Tue Sep 11, 2012 5:21 pm UTC

God dammit TVTropes. Also, Secret of Nimh is a great movie.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Adam H » Tue Sep 11, 2012 6:53 pm UTC

I bet almost everyone who didn't see Secret of Nimh until they were 14 or so will agree that it belongs on this list. It's really painful to watch.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby AvatarIII » Wed Sep 12, 2012 9:11 am UTC

Adam H wrote:I bet almost everyone who didn't see Secret of Nimh until they were 14 or so will agree that it belongs on this list. It's really painful to watch.


I can test that, I'm 26 and have never seen it. I'll see if I can rent it.
Jorpho wrote:I rather liked The Arrival, actually.It's definitely not your typical invasion pic. The sequel sort of felt more like a pilot for a TV series. (Wasn't there a TV series in the end?)


I also like The Arrival,

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby JudeMorrigan » Wed Sep 12, 2012 1:58 pm UTC

'Scuse me, pardon me. But you're terribly wrong. The Secret of NIMH rocked.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby Zarq » Wed Sep 12, 2012 2:29 pm UTC

People like The Arrival? The one with Charlie Sheen? I bought that one once in a 5 for €5 deal, and it's still on my to-watch stack because I thought it was going to be horrible.
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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby AvatarIII » Wed Sep 12, 2012 2:32 pm UTC

Zarq wrote:People like The Arrival? The one with Charlie Sheen? I bought that one once in a 5 for €5 deal, and it's still on my to-watch stack because I thought it was going to be horrible.


Yeah, it's kind of fun, and different, it's by no means a masterpiece so YMMV but it's not horrible.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby raudorn » Thu Sep 13, 2012 12:32 pm UTC

Oh hush! You people have no taste. But alright, I'll admit that Arrival maaaaybe might not be as bad as other movies. I'll derank it on my list and make "Heart of the Warrior" my new worst movie.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby mieu » Thu Sep 13, 2012 10:05 pm UTC

In terms of recent movies, I remember sitting in the theater for Battle: Los Angeles and feeling complete and utter indignation that they would offend my senses with such a terrible, terrible script.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby CorruptUser » Fri Sep 14, 2012 2:58 am UTC

Yeah, I've not been impressed with the "sci-fi" movies that Hollywood has been pumping out as of late. Though I really need to get around to seeing inception. Sci-Fi is supposed to be about philosophy; the future sciency stuff is only there to help create the question, as well as the implications of such technology. Sci-Fi is about the limits of humanity, about what it really means to be human, about whether it's ever right to kill, about what future technology means for future society, the culture shock from actually meeting an alien life form, and so forth. The recent films are things like "oh, it's a prison, but in space", or "it's the decay of Rome, but in space", or "it's Cowboys vs Indians, but in space". Sure, those can make for good settings for real Sci-Fi, but it has to be more than just in space.

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Re: The worst film you've seen

Postby ShortChelsea » Sat Sep 15, 2012 5:44 pm UTC

But, but SPACE!
The worst film I've ever seen is Tokyo Zombies.


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