Time to get confrontational about peanut butter

Apparently, people like to eat.

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Postby aldimond » Thu May 17, 2007 7:15 am UTC

ArchangelShrike wrote:And so the smooth pb-ians faced off against the chunky/crunchy pb-ians, who both persecuted the organic pb-ians for their travesty. But the post counts rose above, and the winner was clear: the crunchy pb-ians.

Bonus points for the book.


The book has got to be Gulliver's Travels, no?

But your post, anyhow, brings up a great idea for polls: polls where your vote is weighted by post-count! Or maybe by the natural log of your postcount to make it less skewed... oh, what the hell am I saying, I have the 4th highest count here, let's make it e^postcount! :twisted:
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Postby ArchangelShrike » Thu May 17, 2007 7:21 am UTC

That was worth an 8. Good lead-up, decent punchline that was still seen from a distance.

Lani wrote: Well, they win anyway for their delicious peanut sauce,

Thais must know something about peanut butter, right?

And if anyone has a good recipe for "panang"/Peanut Curry, could you post it in the cookbook thread please?

[Edit: Absolutely correct. And weighting polls by post counts would make it interesting, see which side has more influence and ability to control the forums in one way or another... Of course, many have died simply for opening the jar of the smooth pb.]

[Edit 2: Why doesn't this thread have a poll for this?]

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Postby Phob0s » Thu May 17, 2007 8:03 am UTC

Creamy. But I don't eat pb&j. Not anymore.
Instead I eat my peanut butter by mixing it with syrup, and spreading it on graham crackers. Close to impossible with chunky.

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Postby Jauss » Thu May 17, 2007 9:32 am UTC

My friends/housemates are on the hippie end of the spectrum, so I'm used to natural peanut butter and can even enjoy it. However, when I buy my own I get the processed stuff. Smooth is okay, but really, it's all about the chunky.

On a side note, anyone here tried cashew butter? I've only had it a handful of times some years ago, but that right there is the shit.
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Postby Pebbles » Thu May 17, 2007 9:45 am UTC

in australia this is jelly ---> http://www.rsc.org/images/b605670a-300_tcm18-57658.jpg
You all confuse me when you call jam jelly. Altho jelly on a sandwhich would be interesting...probably not very jiggly after youve spread it on a sandwhich though.. hmmm.

Also, i do realise that is a picture of american jello. But it seems google image search has failed me... or I failed it.

Furthermore, smooth ftw. I dont like crunchy things in stuff thats meant to be smooth.. its like theres something in there that shouldnt be there and it makes me feel sick.
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Postby evilbeanfiend » Thu May 17, 2007 10:33 am UTC

Phob0s wrote:Creamy. But I don't eat pb&j. Not anymore.
Instead I eat my peanut butter by mixing it with syrup, and spreading it on graham crackers. Close to impossible with chunky.


wow - american peanut butter is already way to sweet for my tastes.

i vote chunky and with no extra sugar
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Postby Alpha Omicron » Thu May 17, 2007 1:58 pm UTC

Here in Canada we call them smooth/crunchy too.

Not really a peanut butter person, but I used to have smooth when I ate it at all.
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Postby space_raptor » Thu May 17, 2007 2:10 pm UTC

Crunchy all the way.

Creamy peanut butter is a crime against God and Science.
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Postby bookishbunny » Thu May 17, 2007 2:21 pm UTC

I like it chunky and I really do like it organic, nothing else added. My favorite it when you get it fresh squeezed (yes, like juice) at certain stores. The texture is more liquid, but also less oily after it's settled. At Whole Foods, they have several different kinds of nut butters, some with chocolate (the chocolate chips are squished with the nuts)....mmmmmmm.
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Postby MFHodge » Thu May 17, 2007 2:34 pm UTC

Pebbles wrote:in australia this is jelly ---> http://www.rsc.org/images/b605670a-300_tcm18-57658.jpg
You all confuse me when you call jam jelly. Altho jelly on a sandwhich would be interesting...probably not very jiggly after youve spread it on a sandwhich though.. hmmm.

Also, i do realise that is a picture of american jello. But it seems google image search has failed me... or I failed it.

Furthermore, smooth ftw. I dont like crunchy things in stuff thats meant to be smooth.. its like theres something in there that shouldnt be there and it makes me feel sick.


Here we have some subtle distinctions between jam and jelly. I don't know what it is though. Maybe jam has bits of fruit in it?

The non-trademarked word for jello is gelatin.

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Postby PatrickRsGhost » Thu May 17, 2007 2:53 pm UTC

I like either, but I prefer smooth. I guess it's because I grew up with smooth, so I'm used to it.

I have found, however, that I will only eat Jif. No other brand will suffice. I have tried Skippy, store brands, Peter Pan, and a few other brands. Jif pwns the others.

I like strawberry preserves. Not jelly. Not jam. PRESERVES. As in with huge chunks of strawberry in the spread. I used to eat apple when I was a kid, but preferred the strawberry when my mom introduced it to me.

Hate grape. That stuff's just gross.

And, in relation to this comic, I have peanut butter, I have strawberry preserves, but no bread. :(
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Postby Ren » Thu May 17, 2007 3:50 pm UTC

But grape is so perfect for pb & j sandwiches! I don't like it in anything else, but it's THE BEST for sandwiches.

I would've said it's my favourite, but blackberry jam recently took that place.

VTHodge: I think you're right, with another distinction for preserves: Preserves has large chunks of fruit in it, jam has seeds/small chunks, and jelly is just smoooooth.
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Postby mr_snafleburger » Thu May 17, 2007 4:23 pm UTC

Chunky penut butter obliterates weak American bread. Creamy goes on smooth, and its great for everything else cooking wise.

theres nothing i hate more than Inconsistant texture in food.

I noticed an odd trend, chunky supporters viamently defend their prefrence, while creamy users tend to be more layed back or even uncertain.
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Postby bookishbunny » Thu May 17, 2007 4:25 pm UTC

mr_snafleburger wrote:Chunky penut butter obliterates weak American bread.


You eat weak bread? There's your other problem. :P
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Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Thu May 17, 2007 4:32 pm UTC

mr_snafleburger wrote:I noticed an odd trend, chunky supporters viamently defend their prefrence, while creamy users tend to be more layed back or even uncertain.

You're right, the creamy-eaters are wussier.

Weak American bread? You're not talking about 'Wonder', are you? Because, you know, they can't legally call it 'bread' anymore, that's why they had to drop it. Get yourself a nice two-pound Berliner Rye.

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EDIT: Huh... usually when I do that, there's an image.

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Postby bookishbunny » Thu May 17, 2007 4:45 pm UTC

Mighty Jalapeno wrote:
mr_snafleburger wrote:I noticed an odd trend, chunky supporters viamently defend their prefrence, while creamy users tend to be more layed back or even uncertain.

You're right, the creamy-eaters are wussier.

Weak American bread? You're not talking about 'Wonder', are you? Because, you know, they can't legally call it 'bread' anymore, that's why they had to drop it. Get yourself a nice two-pound Berliner Rye.

Image

EDIT: Huh... usually when I do that, there's an image.


Except for the failed image, you are so hot to me right now.

(That's what happens reading posts this close to lunch.)
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Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Thu May 17, 2007 4:47 pm UTC

I am... hot to you.... why now? *Edges away nervously*

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Postby Jesse » Thu May 17, 2007 4:54 pm UTC

I don't like peanut butter.

Marmite is better.

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Postby MFHodge » Thu May 17, 2007 4:58 pm UTC

mr_snafleburger wrote:I noticed an odd trend, chunky supporters viamently defend their prefrence, while creamy users tend to be more layed back or even uncertain.


There is probably a good literary term for that . . . Creamy people are smooth and chunky people are abraisive. I love it when language, reality and inane conversation intersect.

Mighty Jalapeno wrote:I am... hot to you.... why now? *Edges away nervously*


Bookishbunny gonna make a nice Jalapeno and peanut butter man-wich.
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Postby Gilly » Thu May 17, 2007 4:58 pm UTC

^Yay Marmite! Peanut butter is good, but I love Marmite....I had four pieces of Marmite'd toast today, excellent. Toast + Marmite + scrambled egg = win.
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Postby bookishbunny » Thu May 17, 2007 4:58 pm UTC

Mighty Jalapeno wrote:I am... hot to you.... why now? *Edges away nervously*


The rye bread, calling creamy-eater wussies....

Oh, I forgot, you're like 17 or something, right?
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Postby Tractor » Thu May 17, 2007 4:59 pm UTC

mr_snafleburger wrote:theres nothing i hate more than Inconsistant texture in food.

Yes, that is one of the many things obnoxious about chunky.

mr_snafleburger wrote:I noticed an odd trend, chunky supporters viamently defend their prefrence, while creamy users tend to be more layed back or even uncertain.

Apparently you missed my first post...

Creamy, bitches!
9 x 6 = 42

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Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Thu May 17, 2007 4:59 pm UTC

I'm 26 with two kids.... *keeps edging*

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Postby Tractor » Thu May 17, 2007 5:02 pm UTC

Also, Marmite? Never heard of it.
I wikied it, and have thusly now seen/heard of it, but what does it taste like?
9 x 6 = 42



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Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Thu May 17, 2007 5:02 pm UTC

Tractor wrote:Also, Marmite? Never heard of it.
I wikied it, and have thusly now seen/heard of it, but what does it taste like?

Tree-ass.

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Postby bookishbunny » Thu May 17, 2007 5:04 pm UTC

Tractor wrote:Apparently you missed my first post...

Creamy, bitches!


And the thread does say to get confrontational about peanut butter!

Might Jalepeno wrote:I'm 26 with two kids.... *keeps edging*


It's okay. You're safe. Skittishness is very unhot, regardless of bread or pb choice. :P
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Postby Gilly » Thu May 17, 2007 5:06 pm UTC

Tractor wrote:Also, Marmite? Never heard of it.
I wikied it, and have thusly now seen/heard of it, but what does it taste like?

Absolutely nothing like peanut butter. It's very hard to liken to anything but itself really...it's savoury, that's all I can really say about it. Oh, and it's good =].
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Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Thu May 17, 2007 5:07 pm UTC

bookishbunny wrote:
Might Jalepeno wrote:I'm 26 with two kids.... *keeps edging*


It's okay. You're safe. Skittishness is very unhot, regardless of bread or pb choice. :P

Statistically, you're probably a guy, hence the edging. Peanut-butter lust is pretty hawt, tho.

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Postby LE4dGOLEM » Thu May 17, 2007 5:08 pm UTC

Ren wrote:
Belial wrote:Chunky.

And can I take this moment to say: FUCK natural peanut butter. It tastes like absolute ass. Every three months or so, I say to myself "I like things that are natural and organic. I like peanut butter. Theoretically, I should like both of these things together."

And then I buy some. And I put it on something. And I eat it. Then I throw the jar away.

And then in three months I forget again. DAMN YOU ORGANIC PEANUT BUTTER!


Yes, yes, and FUCK YES.
My friend always has a jar of chunky organic peanut butter in the studio, and he is always going on about it, and I've tried it and it's gross. GROSS. When you have to stir it first before you can eat it, because all the oil has risen to the top? When it doesn't spread properly? When it leaves you feeling like you've eaten too many stale peanuts? When it covers up the delicious taste of blackberry jelly in a sandwich?
Yech.

Chunky and processed, thank you very much.


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Jauss wrote:On a side note, anyone here tried cashew butter? I've only had it a handful of times some years ago, but that right there is the shit.


Cashew...Butter..?

I declare this to be the entire meaning of food experiments.
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Postby Tractor » Thu May 17, 2007 5:09 pm UTC

So, Marmite:
- tree-ass
- not peanut butter
- savoury goodness

...This isn't helping at all.
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Postby bookishbunny » Thu May 17, 2007 5:09 pm UTC

Mighty Jalapeno wrote:
bookishbunny wrote:
Might Jalepeno wrote:I'm 26 with two kids.... *keeps edging*


It's okay. You're safe. Skittishness is very unhot, regardless of bread or pb choice. :P

Statistically, you're probably a guy, hence the edging. Peanut-butter lust is pretty hawt, tho.


That's hilarious! I'm not a guy, but I am hypoglycemic and need to get a nut butter sandwich RIGHT NOW!!! (That sounds dirty, too.)
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Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Thu May 17, 2007 5:13 pm UTC

bookishbunny wrote:That's hilarious! I'm not a guy, but I am hypoglycemic and need to get a nut butter sandwich RIGHT NOW!!! (That sounds dirty, too.)

In that case, you rock, but my wife will probably kill you. Then me. Then you again. She's like that.

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Postby MFHodge » Thu May 17, 2007 5:13 pm UTC

bookishbunny wrote:
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:
bookishbunny wrote:
Might Jalepeno wrote:I'm 26 with two kids.... *keeps edging*


It's okay. You're safe. Skittishness is very unhot, regardless of bread or pb choice. :P

Statistically, you're probably a guy, hence the edging. Peanut-butter lust is pretty hawt, tho.


That's hilarious! I'm not a guy, but I am hypoglycemic and need to get a nut butter sandwich RIGHT NOW!!! (That sounds dirty, too.)


Following this conversation was made much funnier by knowing that BBunny was female and assuming that Jalepeno thought otherwise. :D

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Postby MFHodge » Thu May 17, 2007 5:15 pm UTC

Tractor wrote:So, Marmite:
- tree-ass
- not peanut butter
- savoury goodness

...This isn't helping at all.


Maybe it's just me, but . . . I have no idea what the word "savoury" really means. I hear it a lot, but don't necessarily "get it". What are some other foods that taste savoury. Do Americans spell it savory?

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Postby Gilly » Thu May 17, 2007 5:18 pm UTC

^Reading that has just made me doubt my definition, but I've always used it as "not-sweet", if that makes sense. Potato chips (we call them crisps) for example, are savoury.
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Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Thu May 17, 2007 5:20 pm UTC

Savoury just means when you eat it, you go "mmmmmm". Just a synonym for tasty.

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Postby Ren » Thu May 17, 2007 5:20 pm UTC

But potato chips are salty! I would more have gone with herb-y, like steak or something like that.

I've always though 'savory' involved spices.
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Postby PatrickRsGhost » Thu May 17, 2007 5:21 pm UTC

Ren wrote:
Belial wrote:Chunky.

And can I take this moment to say: FUCK natural peanut butter. It tastes like absolute ass. Every three months or so, I say to myself "I like things that are natural and organic. I like peanut butter. Theoretically, I should like both of these things together."

And then I buy some. And I put it on something. And I eat it. Then I throw the jar away.

And then in three months I forget again. DAMN YOU ORGANIC PEANUT BUTTER!


Yes, yes, and FUCK YES.
My friend always has a jar of chunky organic peanut butter in the studio, and he is always going on about it, and I've tried it and it's gross. GROSS. When you have to stir it first before you can eat it, because all the oil has risen to the top? When it doesn't spread properly? When it leaves you feeling like you've eaten too many stale peanuts? When it covers up the delicious taste of blackberry jelly in a sandwich?
Yech.

Chunky and processed, thank you very much.


I received a jar of Skippy Natural peanut butter for free one time, and it tasted rather....odd. The label stated there was no stirring required. WTF? Did they remove the oils? THE OILS IS WHAT HELP GIVES IT ITS SPREADABLE CONSISTENCY AND PEANUTTY TASTE, BITCHES! Ended up tossing it out. Problem I've had w/ Skippy in the past is it tends to crust over on top, even if bought fresh. Same with Peter Pan.
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Postby Tractor » Thu May 17, 2007 5:22 pm UTC

savory (US spelling), savoury (UK spelling*)
1. Tasty, attractive to the palate.
2. Not overly sweet.
3. Respectable, usually the seen in the antonym unsavory.

*Crazy Brits and their extra u's.


I was originally taking it to mean tasty, but apparently not sweet would be the definition meant by Gilly.
9 x 6 = 42



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