(Post Your) Incredible Poems (Here!)

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Ren
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(Post Your) Incredible Poems (Here!)

Postby Ren » Thu Apr 05, 2007 3:27 am UTC

A poem! Yay!

The Obligation of Oceanus

I gave my word to the Water God
That I'd return for his apprenticeship
But I have no use for a place by the sea
Even if he
Can reverse the river's flow
I do not want to go home!

My belonging place
Is in a book
Where I hide, where I might
Sustain myself on the wordly words
(And eat like a bird)

For when I was born
It all felt rehearsed
So says the Water God:
"You've been cursed!"
He says I'll never find someone to love
For I am not sorry when the singing becomes silence
But I have nothing to fear of curses
Since I am not free yet of the frantic world

I'm allright
I've been lonely before
(You don't need to have a sword in your hands to be strong, my dear)
Are you a whore?
(No you're not!)

Our heroes
Are those
Who are afraid to say 'no'

I'm afraid, my dear Oceanus
You were so near to us
That I shan't return
You are not my master!
And I will be no hero, nor
Your prentice
Nor your whore
And I WILL not go home!
Last edited by Ren on Sat Jul 28, 2007 8:59 pm UTC, edited 2 times in total.
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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Jesse
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Postby Jesse » Thu Apr 05, 2007 8:13 am UTC

That is really good.

I am really lucky lately in talking to people who are good writers. I'd like to read more of your stuff if possible.

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Postby hermaj » Thu Apr 05, 2007 12:27 pm UTC

Teagn too. I really liked that. :)

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Postby TheTankengine » Fri Apr 06, 2007 7:28 am UTC

hermaj wrote:Teagn too. I really liked that. :)


Umm, did you just spell your own name wrong?
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Ren
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Postby Ren » Fri Apr 06, 2007 7:37 pm UTC

(That's just a little sad.)
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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Postby Ren » Thu May 03, 2007 10:22 pm UTC

Finis Origine Pendet

A piece or a song
Tune or melody
If you say intention defines definition
Then I'll give my declension
Of the ways of ascension!
All attention, please:
If you pull your shoelaces tight enough
Gravity will let you go!

When you told me a swallow
Would remove the tension from my ears
I renewed an avian desire to fly!
To the stratosphere! The atmosphere! My utmostsphere!
It was there that I,
I dreamed you were the astronaut
Of the space inside my head...

(When you looked through my thoughts uninvited
What did you uncover?
What treasure did you discover?)

I dreamed you were the astronaut
Of the space inside my head
And I the cartographer
Of the wrinkles in your bed

And when we wake up in the mornings
(Barring raindrops and tornado warnings)
We'll tell a morning glory story
When we finish the story
It won't have an end
Oh,
What do you think will happen then?
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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Postby Jesse » Fri May 04, 2007 2:18 pm UTC

I have read that before, and I told you then that it was awesome; also I would dearly love to steal:

"I dreamed you were the astronaut
Of the space inside my head
And I the cartographer
Of the wrinkles in your bed "

Because it just sounds so good.

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Ren
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Postby Ren » Mon May 28, 2007 3:01 am UTC

I am becoming increasingly convinced that this is the best thing I've written in a long, long time.

XAIPE
Dear Father,
It is not good to see it rain.
I feel I am staggering, terrified
Through a million
Billion
Trillion points of starry light
(Stars are made of water)
Dissolving day
(The moon is a balloon)
When burst, leaves me alone in the night
In the dark
In the darkestness
I'm at the centre of slow-mo atomic reaction
esreveR nI
Present at the death of a red dwarf

A drunk sings 'Bridge Over Troubled Water,'
Off-key
Outside my window
Disrupting what sleep I had
Disrupting what night I had
Disrupting my everyday

(What's worthwhile in the world if you can't fall in love every day?)
What a waste of potential!
(What's a waste of potential?)
Love is a waste of potential!
It is the cold and unlovely that make the differences!
(Is it?)
Isn't it?
(No)
Why?
(Why not?)
...
It is the people who are crazy
Crazy enough
To think that they can change the world
That do
(That which could be
Is worth so much more
Than that which is already)

Dear Father,
Is it not good to see it rain?
I see a million
Billion
Trillion points of light
That turn my night to day
And make it worthwhile

(But at night, there is silence,
Silence is worthwhile
Where the cacophany of birds is nothing
And the nothing is particularly colossal)

Even Nothing is worthwhile.

I can soar to the highest heights...
(You are the everything!)
I can plunge to the deepest depths...
(Everything is in you!)

Those natures which rejoice so keenly
Also suffer most sharply
(The human factor is a factor)
(Obviously)

Dear Father,
My lover has a brother
Who sits on the bus in a red leather coat
Who reads the Bible and eats licorice

Dear Father...
(I went to a show last night and saw...)
A row of Mennonites at a prog rock concert
Covered heads, covered minds
Expecting a Mass of great proportion
But disappointed
The Faithful
Who cannot move even molehills
But those boys and girls
Who move and sing
Who wear tight shirts and low-rise pants
They shake the mountains when they dance

Dear Father,
Rejoice!
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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Jadestone
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Postby Jadestone » Tue May 29, 2007 12:40 am UTC

I like the way the perspectives shift around in that last poem... the way you use parenthesis is a nice effect too.
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Postby bbctol » Tue May 29, 2007 2:07 am UTC

Ren wrote:I am becoming increasingly convinced that this is the best thing I've written in a long, long time.

It is. I love it.

Your avatar keeps making me think you are new!

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Ren
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Postby Ren » Sat Jun 30, 2007 9:08 pm UTC

Balladie
Oh, give me a place in a ramshackle orchestra
Let me play support to an amoral alligator
And I shall be well enough content
To make my mecky voice another's

Accordions, all!
An only solo, lonely trumpet in C
Played by a lonesome, winsome man.
Of what is he afraid?
Of death, of growing old, of a pipe-bag bladder
(Wheezing, squealing, foul)
Or afraid to give life to gypsy matter?

Oh, give me a place, a place on a bench
A second chair or something worse
For I would be near to hear all that comes
And play, if I may,
Behind the vibrating strings of the untoward universe

Oh make me Balkan, Bohemian, Believe!
A shabby conductor of a threadbare symphony
Where hobos play oboes and buffoons bassoons
And a lonesome, winsome man plays
A trumpet in C
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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Postby GhostWolfe » Sun Jul 01, 2007 12:17 am UTC

Please, please publish a collection of your poems. I want to carry it with me where ever I go until the cover is battered and the pages are starting to look worn and ragged. I imagine the cover is a deep maroon, and it is thin and small enough to easily fit in a handbag, but maybe too large for the inner pocket of a man's jacket.

Stop me if I'm rambling...

Not that I mean to imply that I would stop carrying it, ever, just that I am a perfectionist by nature and I have never let a book become so well-read that it looks well read yet. And I'm still not making sense am I?
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Postby Narsil » Mon Jul 02, 2007 2:16 pm UTC

I can't even begin to describe how awesome these are.

They all have a definite flow to them. Something that I can feel operating far below the level of text.

You, madame, have serious talent in this and if you have enough of these, do the world a favor and get them published. I'll be your first customer.
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Oh... that.

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Postby ArchangelShrike » Mon Jul 02, 2007 7:42 pm UTC

I hardly come around these parts, but if we don't have a sticky for poems we should.

Loved them all!

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Ren
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Postby Ren » Tue Jul 03, 2007 12:34 am UTC

Thanks guys. You all made me blush!

Why is this stickied? It had better be for *everyone's* poems then, not just mine.

(Hurry up, guys! Put your poetry here, so I don't feel like such a narcissist!)

It was stickied because your poems are excellent quality. I really enjoyed them so I felt you deserved at least some shred of recognition, its not much, but here you go!
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Postby crazyjimbo » Tue Jul 03, 2007 12:37 am UTC

Little doggy crossing street,
Motor car, sausage meat.

Probably not quite what you're looking for... :)

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Postby EradicateIV » Tue Jul 03, 2007 5:39 am UTC

crazyjimbo wrote:Little doggy crossing street,
Motor car, sausage meat.

Probably not quite what you're looking for... :)


that's so beautiful! LOL
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Postby Brian » Tue Jul 03, 2007 5:59 am UTC

Here's one I recently wrote.

-------------------------------------

I'm not the same as I used to be,
or so I'll claim. In time we'll see.
Much has changed since last we met.
Your sudden arrival has caused much fret.
See, I have no clue of how to act
around such a girl with beauty and tact.

You called me. I answered, hiding my fear.
I've become quite skilled at instead showing cheer.
We decided on running the track at the school.
Of course you're in shape! I looked like a fool.
When you finally finished we collapsed on the grass.
and got to discussing how fast time can pass.

Eventually we got past all of the pointess, stupid bullshit about my sister getting married or the recent windy weather and got to the fact that your boyfriend is in town and how its amazing to be around each other for the first time in nine months, which makes me incredibly happy and yet completely and utterly dead inside because I know where you've come from and how amazing you've become in spite of what you were which is now beautiful and intelligent and successful and happy...

I wish... I wish... for one mistake.
A flaw in your life of which I can partake.
I wish that you'd mess up and somehow just see
much more than there ever has been inside me.
Take me for funny, for wise or for kind.
Make of me anything to displace your mind.

I suppose that the end of it wouldn't be there.
So one last wish to make all things fair.
Your happiness, surely, is the the jewel that I seek.
So have it, in spite of the closeness we keep.
For you to be happy and me to be near...
Such is my dream to which there's no peer.

Then I realized I'd been looking right past
the girl of my dreams... of dreams that can't last.
Life has a way of tearing them down
in front of your eyes till you're beat to the ground.
I guess that opposed to staring right through,
The smile of a friend is the best I can do.

As we both drove away I kept my sight straight.
Looking at mirrors would not be my fate.
To see this girl happy in spite of a need
for myself and my presence... quite humbling indeed.
My comfort is knowing my role as a friend,
For my selfish dream is not worth your dream's end.

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Postby digitalc » Tue Jul 03, 2007 6:03 am UTC

ren, brian, and crazyjimbo, you all have such lovely poems! i would post mine, but I'm a bit shy now.

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Ren
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Postby Ren » Tue Jul 03, 2007 6:15 am UTC

Don't be shy! We shall all be nice, don't worry.
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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Postby digitalc » Tue Jul 03, 2007 6:22 am UTC

hmm... mine is kind of short, but it's not quite done yet.


i am a virgin martyr
in this broken dream
i am the product of your jealousy
i am less than i seem
waiting for my eyes to close
i can feel you in me
breaking everything inside
walking away empty
i am just a hollow mary
no more than a shattered name
trace your lips this quiet voice
and question who to blame

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Postby GhostWolfe » Tue Jul 03, 2007 6:28 am UTC

You had nothing to be shy about, that's really awesome. I'd love to read it when it's finished.
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Postby ArchangelShrike » Tue Jul 03, 2007 8:36 am UTC

As soon as I have new poems other than sappy love poems that make me want to curl to fetal, I'll post some.

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Postby pollywog » Tue Jul 03, 2007 10:19 am UTC

Who's willing to get a "Poems of xkcd" collection published. I am. These are beautiful.

Ren, Xaipe made me cry. Not that it's hard right now, but it's so beautiful. Please put some more up.

Jesus, Brian, you made me cry too. Especially this:
Brian wrote:For my selfish dream is not worth your dream's end.


Digitalc, you didn't make me cry, I'm sorry. But I do like your poem.

I'm going on holiday, so I might write one and show you, although my poems tend to be the worst combination of depression and teenager.

Can I print Xaipe off and put it on my wall? Please?
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Postby GhostWolfe » Tue Jul 03, 2007 10:23 am UTC

I just wrote this because you're all so excellent that I wanted to try my hand. This is just off the top of my head, so it's no where near the quality of you guys. It looks better centred... ~k.

Darkness
The chill of winter night's breath
I'm not good at hiding in the shadows
This light of mine is all I have to give
I'll help you find your way
If you know to show me how
There's a world ripped away
It's lying at my feet
I want to plunge into that crevasse
Teetering
How does it feel to fall?
I don't understand how to let go
I cannot lose control
Relentlessly gripping my thoughts
This is my sense of self
I am light against what is dark
I am opposite
I am different
I am what you didn't see coming
I am what you didn't notice leaving
I am the emptiness in your heart
Extinguished
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Postby ShadeWolf » Tue Jul 03, 2007 10:43 am UTC

That was very moving poem Silverwolfe, and that poem I would like to keep close by if thats alright by you
The wolf that walks in the dark is no more.

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Postby __Kit » Tue Jul 03, 2007 11:57 am UTC

I can write poetry, most of mine are humorous but would be pointless to post here, they are just full of personal inside jokes, and i write them mostly to family and close friends who would understand them, I wrote one about Easter that I could put up here and was going to, but I think I threw away my poems when I was tidying my room, sorry.

When I can I will write a poem of xkcd.
=]

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Postby the Cow » Tue Jul 03, 2007 1:24 pm UTC

sincerely, your heart can pound
I hear it across the room
there is nothing I can do
as mine is bound
to tables and chairs and time
so helpless it pounds the beat
of things in mind today
and through this gag I murmer
"so long as you never go away"

sincerely, your heart can pound
I hear it as i pace
there is little left to say now
and I see it in your face
the dispair that once was there
is now those tables and chairs
and time, she slows her gait now
and sets her mind on other affairs
...the whim of a hat.

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Ren
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Postby Ren » Tue Jul 03, 2007 2:40 pm UTC

Pollywog: Of course you can. I'm very flattered, and more than a little flustered.
You guys are all very talented. I like it!

This is something I wrote just because I was happy. It's not very well thought-through, and I'm not happy with the rhythm of a couple of lines. I'd be happy for input and criticism.
Also: Yes, yes, that's an xkcd reference in the title.

The Future is an Adventure!
Dearest, let's move in together
We can choreograph dances
And drink too much tea;
Make soup, and
Guarantee
That all the faucets work,
That mice will not eat our bread.

You're a rough diamond, and
Worth your weight in shreddies!
While I sit on the porch
To watch the parade go by.

Amateurism will make it worthwhile!
We'll take risks and make rhymes.
You'll scare off monsters in the dark,
And I'll take my olive loaf to the mimes
For we are ginger, rosemary, and impolite.

(We may have to trade the full-time gamelan section
For pictures and cheap thrills,
But it will get us out of our car
And into our dreams...)

Oh my soul!
My loyalty is to life and love
(and to walnut fudge,
of which there is no better judge)

Someone tell me what happened to just being real?
There will be no abuses, no excuses!
No complaints!
And above all--
We shall be free!
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Postby German Sausage » Tue Jul 03, 2007 2:45 pm UTC

can i move in with you? :D
that is fantastic!
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Ren
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Postby Ren » Tue Jul 03, 2007 3:59 pm UTC

the Cow wrote:and time, she slows her gait now
and sets her mind on other affairs


This is fantastic.
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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the Cow
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Postby the Cow » Tue Jul 03, 2007 4:04 pm UTC

Thank you. I didn't think it scanned right and I was upset that it rhymed. Also, stupidly, I feel a little too old to be posting poetry. I wish I could get over stupid feeling that I am too old for xkcd.

Also, as Hammer pointed out, it has spelling errors.

I liked your last poem post very much.
...the whim of a hat.

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Postby TheTankengine » Tue Jul 03, 2007 4:28 pm UTC

the Cow wrote:Also, stupidly, I feel a little too old to be posting poetry. I wish I could get over stupid feeling that I am too old for xkcd.


You are a genuinely passionate individual with wide ranging interests. I think that should suffice for xkcd.
be centered
be compassionate
be interesting

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Postby Brian » Tue Jul 03, 2007 4:55 pm UTC

Ren wins, I submit :P

The Future is an Adventure! is awesome. I think I need to take a poetry-writing class. aabbcc can drag after a time but I'm not patient enough to figure out a different scheme.

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Postby LE4dGOLEM » Tue Jul 03, 2007 5:09 pm UTC

TheTankengine wrote:
the Cow wrote:Also, stupidly, I feel a little too old to be posting poetry. I wish I could get over stupid feeling that I am too old for xkcd.


You are a genuinely passionate individual that looks like Richard Stallman, but younger with wide ranging interests. I think that should suffice for xkcd.


Fix'd
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Postby TheTankengine » Tue Jul 03, 2007 5:24 pm UTC

LE4dGOLEM wrote:
TheTankengine wrote:
the Cow wrote:Also, stupidly, I feel a little too old to be posting poetry. I wish I could get over stupid feeling that I am too old for xkcd.


You are a genuinely passionate individual that looks like Ryan Stallman, but younger with wide ranging interests. I think that should suffice for xkcd.


Fix'd


Who is Ryan Stallman?

~...Richard.
be centered
be compassionate
be interesting

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Postby GhostWolfe » Tue Jul 03, 2007 10:34 pm UTC

*awesome hugs for Ren and Cow* You guys are simply amazing, I feel all abashed trying to stand my poetry next to you guys.
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Postby Jesse » Tue Jul 03, 2007 10:46 pm UTC

Brave Heart

Black Douglas took my heart
But never made it to Jerusalem.
Now it's lying buried
In a Melrose Abbey tomb.

No more flash of steel
T'accompany the crack of wood.
Battle cry silenced
Beneath the granite burden
Borne by those
With the power to lead others.
Uphold their beliefs;
Fight for freedom.

Until the flames are smothered,
Like all such brilliance must be.
Hammer of England will fall no more:
The world is darker for it.

Thus false crusades do end
Amidst the failing heat of Spanish suns.
A lonely, loyal voice cries out
"Go first into the fight, brave heart,
As you have ever done."

((I wish I had some of tha talent evined by you guys. I am no slouch but a long way from being good))

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Ren
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Postby Ren » Tue Jul 03, 2007 10:52 pm UTC

It's soooooo much better, though, Jesse. Sooooo much. At least 12 004 times better. Possibly more.
MotleyJesster (12:34:04 PM): Better than moping around being all "I do not need love, I have indie music and a wind instrument!"

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Jesse
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Postby Jesse » Tue Jul 03, 2007 11:03 pm UTC

Ren wrote:It's soooooo much better, though, Jesse. Sooooo much. At least 12 004 times better. Possibly more.


Just because I can see the truth doesn't mean I have to admit it to your face.


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