1171:"Perl Problems"

[Quicksilver]

http://xkcd.com/1171/
Alt Text:"To generate #1 albums, 'jay --help' recommends the -z flag."
I've not had much experience with Perl, but this sounds more like an assembler issue.

[rhomboidal]

"I got the rap patrol on the stat() patrol..."

[Doctor Device]

I'm surprised the regular expressions only generated a single additional problem. I would expect them to generate a new problem for every problem already in the system.

[sbkp]

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s/(\d+)/$1+1/e;

[ysth]

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s/(\d+)/$1+1/e;

Doesn't work for me:

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$ perl -Mcharnames=:full -we'$problems = "\N{MATHEMATICAL SANS-SERIF BOLD DIGIT ZERO}"; $problems =~ s/(\d+)/$1+1/e;'
Argument "\x{1d7ec}" isn't numeric in addition (+) at -e line 1.


Also,

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$ jay
The program 'jay' is currently not installed.  You can install it by typing:
sudo apt-get install mono-jay


Ewww, who wants mono?

[sbkp]

This is the whole thing that worked here. I guess you're proving the comic, though.

Code: Select all

$_ = "99 problems";
s/(\d+)/$1+1/e;
print;

[madock345]

Dammit. First XKCD in a long time where I didn't get any of the jokes. I hate when that happens, but I guess it wouldn't be XKCD if it didn't. I used to keep track, but It started getting so rare for me to not get one that I stopped. Guess I'm going to have to restart the timer now.

[dbentley]

This is a great joke. In fact, I liked it so much, I thought of it 3 years ago. I'll claim a previous invention of it (in no way asserting Randall stole it).

"RT @dbentley: Jay-Z thought, "I know, I'll use regular expressions." Now he has 100 problems."

I'd like to link to it, but the forum is flagging it as spam. It's twitter slash jwz slash status slash 10659845358

(Retweeted on) March 18, 2010 (by @jwz)

(I am @dbentley on twitter)

[Tova]

All I'm getting for the comic is a swirly "busy" mouse pointer. With that title, I'd assumed that Randall was just trolling his readers again.

[Coyne]

This can be used for almost anything:

I got 99 problems, so I used XML; now I have 100 problems.

[Max™]

I got 99 problems but my code ain't one, if you havin' perl problems I feel bad for you son.

I got 99 problems, so I used python, now I can fly!

[creaothceann]

Wait, did he just simply re-use Zawinski's quote and comic 927?

[Editer]

Wait, did he just simply re-use Zawinski's quote and comic 927?

Zawinski popularized that quote but didn't come up with it himself. FWIW.

[jalohones]

A couple of posts have explained the regular expressions side of this joke. Am I the only person who had to google Jay-Z?

[Klear]

Am I the only person who had to google Jay-Z?

You are quite lucky.

[jalohones]

Am I the only person who had to google Jay-Z?

You are quite lucky.

Sweet! I'm gonna drop a bundle on a horse race now. LUCK!

[Jeff_UK]

A couple of posts have explained the regular expressions side of this joke. Am I the only person who had to google Jay-Z?

I'd heard of him, and assumed this was a reference to some lyrics of some sort didn't know the track though...

[rmsgrey]

A couple of posts have explained the regular expressions side of this joke. Am I the only person who had to google Jay-Z?

I'd heard of him, and assumed this was a reference to some lyrics of some sort didn't know the track though...

Pretty much the same for me.

Oh, and my current project at work involves extensive string manipulation - faced with a choice between using pre-baked regular expression handling, or constructing my own parser with a lot of the same capabilities and features, I'm embracing the regex...

[HarryUrashima]

A couple of posts have explained the regular expressions side of this joke. Am I the only person who had to google Jay-Z?

I'd heard of him, and assumed this was a reference to some lyrics of some sort didn't know the track though...

"If you're having girl problems I fell bad for you son
I've got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one"

[rjsteg]

This is not a shocking result.

For me, perl is the *only* language that I cannot *read* another programmer's program!!

[leifbk]

This can be used for almost anything:

I got 99 problems, so I used XML; now I have 100 problems.

«XML is like violence; if it doesn't work, then you're not using enough of it.»

[Dthen]

If you havin' Perl problems I feel bad for you, son, I got 99 problems, but a glitch ain't one.

[Klear]

If you havin' Perl problems I feel bad for you, son, I got 99 problems, but a glitch ain't one.

That's better than the comic itself =)

[sbkp]

This is not a shocking result.

For me, perl is the *only* language that I cannot *read* another programmer's program!!

Perl does have the reputation of being a "write-only" language.

[orthogon]

This is not a shocking result.

For me, perl is the *only* language that I cannot *read* another programmer's program!!

Perl does have the reputation of being a "write-only" language.

Brilliant. As sbkp implies, you have to be a pretty skilled perl programmer to be able to read your own program. I like to think that I'm pretty good at syntax, and only in perl do I have to resort to trial-and-error to get the result I want. I have written lines of perl for which I have absolutely no idea how/why they work.

[rcox1]

Just a generally funny comic. Haven't had one of these in a while

[cellocgw]

As long as we're into songs about 99 (and I sure hope NOT involving balloons),

Aleph-null bottles of beer on the wall, Aleph-null bottles of beer, Take one down, and pass it around, Aleph-null bottles of beer on the wall
(attributed to Rentain & Dundes)

[synaemnid]

This is not a shocking result.

For me, perl is the *only* language that I cannot *read* another programmer's program!!

The fun part of reading Cryptonomicon was figuring out what the Perl program did before it was explained. I didn't know Perl, so I had to also decipher the syntax (without googling!)

[TheEponymousBob]

Jay-Z is probably the best rapper ever to be named after the vertical component of quantum angular momentum. Similarly for Alt-J and the laplacian.

[O-Deka-K]

Wait, did he just simply re-use Zawinski's quote and comic 927?

"If you're having girl problems I fell bad for you son
I've got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one"

Huh. Maybe the joke is that Jamie Zawinsky == Jay-Z.

[ahammel]

The year is '94 and the code was raw
In the bug report queue is a motherfucking log
I got two choices y'all, patch it quick or
Wait for the next release and show the feature the door
Now I ain't trying to see no flame war with the users
And I got a few hours while IT fixes my computer
So I...branch the repo and pop open the code
And I see:

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# Son, do you know what this regex is for?

Does it parse the input to a sick ass flow?
Do I look like a mind reader, sir? I don't know
Did you write a unit test or should I guess some more?

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# Well my manager complained that I was coding to slow

Uh huh..

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# Maybe you could write the test now, if you're so smart
# Are you a 1337 h@><0r? I know a lot of you are

I ain't testing your shit, all my code is legit!

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# Well do you mind refactoring this class a little bit?

Well, it's full of hacks and kludges and that's a nasty patch.
And I'm busy, so talk to my manager about that.

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# Why aren't you sharp as a tack? Are you a hacker or something?
# Maybe you're somebody important or something?

Naw I ain't RMS but I know a little bit.
Enough to not waste all my time fixing your shit.

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# Shows how smart you are, it's just a fencepost error son

You got 99 problems but somehow solved 101

Hit me.

[Tynach]

I don't know perl, but I learned perl-compatible regex in my PHP class.

I had the hardest time understanding them, so just for... Uh, fun? I decided to choose the most unrealistic goal possible with regex to force myself to learn it. What'd I choose? The URI specification from Sir Tim Burners Lee. The result:

http://regexlib.com/REDetails.aspx?regexp_id=3246

And yet, I am afraid to use it. I don't think it would properly validate a URI, I just know that it does match any existing proper URI. So I can't use it anyway.

[WeWanttheFunk]

The year is '94 and the code was raw
In the bug report queue is a motherfucking log
I got two choices y'all, patch it quick or
Wait for the next release and show the feature the door
Now I ain't trying to see no flame war with the users
And I got a few hours while IT fixes my computer
So I...branch the repo and pop open the code
And I see:

Code: Select all

# Son, do you know what this regex is for?

Does it parse the input to a sick ass flow?
Do I look like a mind reader, sir? I don't know
Did you write a unit test or should I guess some more?

Code: Select all

# Well my manager complained that I was coding to slow

Uh huh..

Code: Select all

# Maybe you could write the test now, if you're so smart
# Are you a 1337 h@><0r? I know a lot of you are

I ain't testing your shit, all my code is legit!

Code: Select all

# Well do you mind refactoring this class a little bit?

Well, it's full of hacks and kludges and that's a nasty patch.
And I'm busy, so talk to my manager about that.

Code: Select all

# Why aren't you sharp as a tack? Are you a hacker or something?
# Maybe you're somebody important or something?

Naw I ain't RMS but I know a little bit.
Enough to not waste all my time fixing your shit.

Code: Select all

# Shows how smart you are, it's just a fencepost error son

You got 99 problems but somehow solved 101

Hit me.

Put your hands together!

[duckshirt]

Wait, did he just simply re-use Zawinski's quote and comic 927?

"If you're having girl problems I fell bad for you son
I've got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one"

Huh. Maybe the joke is that Jamie Zawinsky == Jay-Z.

Came here to suggest that as well. That makes it a bit more clever.

[O-Deka-K]

The year is '94 and the code was raw
...snipped...
Hit me.

AWESOME

[Max™]

The year is '94 and the code was raw
...snipped...
Hit me.

AWESOME

Agreed, your rhymes are truly dope, ahammel.

[Falling]

Here's a bit of backstory on the problems quote.

[ShadedKnight]

The year is '94 and the code was raw
...snipped...
Hit me.

AWESOME

Agreed, your rhymes are truly dope, ahammel.

I felt the sick fires from all the way over here.

On another note, I still have no experience with perl so I get what the comic is saying I think, but I would be lying if I said I get the whole thing.

[Steeler]

xkcd's been on a roll ever since Debugger, but this one is the best yet! I think a lot of the feel of the older comics is back.

[Dthen]

If you havin' Perl problems I feel bad for you, son, I got 99 problems, but a glitch ain't one.

That's better than the comic itself =)

Thanks! It's what I expected the punchline to be.