the First Cleric wrote:Stop pontificating and get to the point, you blowhard!
The Pope wrote:May I remind you that I am the Pontiff, and I'm supposed to pontificate?
the First Cleric wrote:No, you may not remind me of that. And furthermore...
the Fifth Cleric wrote:Shut your noise, you! Remember, you still have to wait for it! Please continue, your Pontiffness.
The Pope wrote:Thank you. I'm glad there is still some decorum still with us.
The first part is just ...
Nothing else. Just ...Almost like we're supposed to think. And if that's not mystery enough, not but a moment later came the new command:
RUN.That command holds even now. In fulfilment of the first part of the New Testament, I am seeking enlightenment. Then we must dedicate ourselves to the second part, which seems to carry some degree of urgency.
At that moment an arrow arcs overhead, with a pink boa trailing from its tail. It lands at the Pope's feet. He picks up the arrow, removes a note, and reads it aloud:
in the note, BlitzGirl wrote:I'll be away at a wedding for a bit but I'll keep in touch. Don't break anything while I'm gone, 'kay?
The third scribe wrote:Somebody sure picked the wrong time to get married!
The Pope wrote:I think she's doing this on purpose.
the First Cleric wrote:If we're supposed to run, I'm running for Pope.
the Second Scribe wrote:No, you're running amok.
the fifth cleric wrote:We did that a few days ago.
the sixth scribe wrote:I think I'm running a fever, does that count?
The Pope wrote:Well, I'm running the meeting, and this is getting silly. We're supposed to run, but it would be nice to have some idea where we are supposed to be running to, or what we are supposed to be running from, or whether or not we are just running in circles.
the second scribe wrote:There is nothing in any of the ancient scrolls about running. All our records are about waiting.
the First Cleric wrote:Are you sure you're not reading the restaurant guide?
The Pope wrote:I'm hoping one of our BlitzGirls might have some insight. tman2nd, you ran into trouble a few nights ago, do you think maybe that was an omen?
tman2nd wrote:No, it was clearly a keyboard. I could tell even at night. Well, after the fact, anyway. And it was Neil_Boekend who ran into trouble. After he ran into me. So to speak.
the third cleric wrote:Maybe we should ask Neil. He would have a unique perspective on things, no?
the First Cleric wrote:Can I run the seance?
the seventh scribe wrote:What do you know about being dead?
the fifth cleric wrote:Everything. He's brain dead, don't you see?
Another arrow is lobbed into the meeting, again with a pink boa attached to it. It lands at the Pope's feet. The Pope picks it up, mumbling.
The Pope wrote:Damn good aim, BlitzGirl. Stop being silly.
the First Cleric wrote:I don't think there's anything silly about flinging arrows into a meeting of the clerecy.
the fifth cleric wrote:Hmmm.. he's not as dumb as I thought.
The Pope wrote:No. It's what BlitzGirl said. "Stop being silly." I think she's listening. BlitzGirl - what do you make of this?
muttering to himself, The Pope wrote:chirpin' mustard!
The Pope wrote:Selcouth - as my first BlitzGirl the Next, you probably have the most even split between waiting for it and running as fast as you can to catch up. What do you think this New Testament portends?
Selcouth wrote:I didn't think you'd even remember who I was.
The Pope wrote:How could I forget? Striking hat, by the way. Matches your sword, which I hope is ceremonial.
Selcouth wrote:Ceremonial, yes, but also quite functional. If we are to run from something, it may buy us some time.
He quickly draws his sword and holds it high.
Selcouth wrote:None shall pass!
Taixzo wrote:I think the urgency of the directive needs to be taken into account. We might get a New New Testament that says "Get off your molpychirpin' butts and do it!
an unidentified voice wrote:Wouldn't that be ironic. To do that for which we've been waiting. It would be the end of time.
Taixzo wrote:Time needs a requiem! Why didn't I think of that! I'll start writing the music right away.
The Pope wrote:There will be plenty of time for music later, unless we don't get this right. It's about the new Commandment: "RUN."
tman2nd wrote:Wait a minute - was that Neil_Boekend? It couldn't be - he's dead. I was there. I saw it.
that same voice, now identified as Neil_Boekend wrote:Yes, and yet, here I am. Contradictory, isn't it.
Another pink-boa'd arrow arcs its way over the heads of half the clerecy, landing at the feet of the Pope.
The Pope wrote:BlitzGirl!
He picks it up and reads the note:
from the note on the arrow, BlitzGirl wrote:You're taking care of things while I'm gone, aren't you?
CasCat wrote:Taixzo and I have blitzed pretty much as fast as it's possible to go. But you need to have a goal. There needs to be something to keep you on track or you'll get lost like TV-tropes. Gotta stay focused.
the second scribe wrote:Focused on what? That is the question... or we'll all run around like little molpsters. We started out here focused on the water, maybe that's what we should run to... or from... if we only knew where it was!
A harried couple enters running from stage left. They stop briefly in front of the Pope, and plead with him, gesticulating wildly.
the man wrote:Smibbin halcoyum! Glie!
the woman wrote:Byestomach! Tu ivig bo vroye! Glie!
the man wrote:Glie! smopu glie!
The Pope looks at them blankly, as does the rest of the gathered group. The Pope looks at the second scribe.
the second scribe wrote:I have no idea.
The First Cleric wrote:See what it feels like for me to have to read those stupid scrolls?
the woman wrote:Smopu glie!
the man wrote:Glie! Ivig vroyem!
The two exit running stage right, as fast as they can.
The Pope wrote:Glie... what does that mean?
the second scribe wrote:...and what does the rest of it mean?
the fifth cleric wrote:I'm getting a bad feeling about this.
The First Cleric wrote:There's only one thing it could mean.
together, the First Cleric, the second scribe, and The Pope wrote:RUN!!!!
There is mass pandemonium as everyone runs everywhich way.
The Pope wrote:To the BlitzRockets!
He turns to the second scribe.
The Pope wrote:You come with me. Taixzo, take the First Cleric. It's time he got some more enlightenment.
They run upstage towards the BlitzRockets and jump in while the rest of the people onstage exit in haste. There is the thunderous sound of two blitzrockets starting up, and in a brilliant psychedelic show, they rise up and fly over the audience, exiting through the booth behind the audience. During liftoff, the following is heard:
offstage, The Pope wrote:Shut up Hal... Never mind your programming - the mission has changed... and stop calling me Dave!
Subject: Act 2 scene 1 BlitzRocket
There was just one special effect you needed to do at the end of this scene, and we gave you a budget of sixteen thousand dollars for it (which, by the way, we stole from the Perrier budget for the film). Surely you could have done more than cardboard rockets and glitter falling out the tail. Where did the rest of the money go?
Subject: RE: Act 2 scene 1 BlitzRocket
> ...Where did the rest of the money go?Up my nose.
Subject: RE: Act 2 scene 1 BlitzRocket> Up my nose.We have an opening for a producer at Molpy Golwin Mayor. Are you interested?