xkcd

Website · by **Kazuke** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:25 pm UTC

I've been doing this for a long time, but with Patrick Stewart's voice.

by **ThemePark** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:29 pm UTC

Morglor9 wrote:Sure, your life being narrated by Morgan Freeman would be cool, but it comes in second to narration by the master:

James Earl Jones.

Click.

by **Sprocket** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:35 pm UTC

GAH! I saw it again! MY EYES!

by **minty ice** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 5:08 pm UTC

Like a twinkie... like a twinkie...

by **TheAntiElite** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 5:32 pm UTC

Actually, my own moments are narrated by the Five Guys.

Don LaFontaine. John Leader. Mark Elliot. Al Chalk. And featuring Nick Tate as the suave, debonair voice of getting my Schwerve on.

Frequent guest spots of Overwhelming Awesome include the inimitable James Earl Jones (whom I've been told I sound remarkably like, when angry), Laurence Fishbourne, Samuel L. Jackson, and on a truly spectacular occasion, Peter Cullen.

Irritation has been infrequently narrated by Pat Sajak.

by **Chase Watkins** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 5:38 pm UTC

My personal favorite inner-narrator is Gilbert Gottfried. It makes any bad situation funny.

by **Grego** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 7:04 pm UTC

Kazuke wrote:I've been doing this for a long time, but with Patrick Stewart's voice.

Seconded. That man's voice is like some sort of sanctuary ^_^

by **HPDDJ** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 7:05 pm UTC

In other news, the drawing of Morgan Freeman is very... odd...

by **Sprocket** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 7:54 pm UTC

TheAntiElite wrote:Actually, my own moments are narrated by the Five Guys.

Don LaFontaine. John Leader. Mark Elliot. Al Chalk. And featuring Nick Tate as the suave, debonair voice of getting my Schwerve on.

Frequent guest spots of Overwhelming Awesome include the inimitable James Earl Jones (whom I've been told I sound remarkably like, when angry), Laurence Fishbourne, Samuel L. Jackson, and on a truly spectacular occasion, Peter Cullen.

Irritation has been infrequently narrated by Pat Sajak.

Zach Braff, Douglass Adams, Neil Gaiman, Wes Anderson

by **libra** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 8:32 pm UTC

When I read the title, my eyes betrayed me. I read the words as "Freemasonic Paranoia."

Turned out the expectation was more amusing than the reality. If I started thinking with the voice of Morgan Freeman, I think I'd be more than halfway to a rest home by now.

The voice I think with is rather different. For one thing, sometimes it sounds like Zoe Wanamaker ...

by **halcyon1234** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 9:07 pm UTC

aju227 wrote:I have Rickmanic Paracusia (Alan Rickman). Narrates my textbooks.

It could be worse. You could have Rickroll Paracusia. Everything you try to read gets replaced in your head with a rickroll.

by **Exenon** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 9:56 pm UTC

Imagine having Samara Paracusia. I mean, each time you read something, instead, your mind plays the ring-vid. But, on the other hand, this disease doesnt last longer than seven days.... :mrgreen:

by **Fuzz18500** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 10:13 pm UTC

Depending on the situation I have either Rod Serling (for explaining odd circumstances that surround me), Lorne Greene (if I'm ever in a wild west shootout), or Barry White (for the boudoir) providing the internal monologue of my life. For normal day-to-day goings on, though, I'd have to say Freemanic and Ironsic paracusia are the best.

by **Ghona** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 11:02 pm UTC

aju227 wrote:I have Rickmanic Paracusia (Alan Rickman). Narrates my textbooks.

Better than my variant of Rickmanic. It's Rick Astley.

by **JoystickHero** » Wed Aug 13, 2008 11:34 pm UTC

Am I the only one who read "Freemanic Paracusia" with Freemanic Paracusia?

by **kanavazk** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 12:01 am UTC

Morglor9 wrote:Sure, your life being narrated by Morgan Freeman would be cool, but it comes in second to narration by the master:

James Earl Jones.

I was going to post that earlier too, but I forgot the name of that guy.

And to the above post: No, probably not.

by **InstinctSage** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 6:34 am UTC

Christopher Walken narrates the majority of my thoughts. Shatner and Morgan Freeman are in there too, though. There's some peppy British voiceover girl who does a lot when the mood takes me, too.

by **sje46** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 6:48 am UTC

Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not.

Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

by **JayDee** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 6:57 am UTC

Splarka wrote:
JayDee wrote:Okay, now I want a Morgan Freeman text-to-speech program.
It took Tom Baker 11 days (over a 3 month period) to record 11593 phrases, which British Telecom then spent 5 months processing in order to create something totally awesome.

Thanks Splarka! That is too damn cool. I wonder what the 11593 phrases were? Knowing the requirements would make it easier to work out if we had enough samples from movies.

by **michael24easilybored** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 9:03 am UTC

JayDee wrote:
Splarka wrote:
JayDee wrote:Okay, now I want a Morgan Freeman text-to-speech program.
It took Tom Baker 11 days (over a 3 month period) to record 11593 phrases, which British Telecom then spent 5 months processing in order to create something totally awesome.
Thanks Splarka! That is too damn cool. I wonder what the 11593 phrases were? Knowing the requirements would make it easier to work out if we had enough samples from movies.

I just sent myself a text and the voice on the end of the phone wasn't tom baker but some random computer woman. Although she did say some very bad words so it wasn't a completely wasted morning

by **ThemePark** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 9:19 am UTC

sje46 wrote:Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not.

Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

Sure we do. Doesn't everybody?

by **Exenon** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 9:30 am UTC

ThemePark wrote: sje46 wrote:Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not.

Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

Sure we do. Doesn't everybody?

Somebody has to answer "For example, I hear my own voice". It's not very funny, so i dont say it, but somebody... :mrgreen:

! I mean, for example, this guy over there. Yeah, he says it. LETS BEAT HIM TO DEATH !!! :mrgreen:

by **Felstaff** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 9:33 am UTC

ThemePark wrote:
sje46 wrote:Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not. Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

Sure we do. Doesn't everybody?

...

by **ThemePark** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 10:03 am UTC

(monotone tone) For example, I hear my own voice.

Better?

Also, Kermit? I'm glad I'm not sje46 though.

by **age** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 12:49 pm UTC

that xkcd morgan freeman is the creepiest damn thing i've ever seen

by **Felstaff** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 12:56 pm UTC

ThemePark wrote:Also, Kermit? Harrrrooo, I'm glad I'm not sje46 though.

by **sm_usagi** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 5:33 pm UTC

age wrote:that xkcd morgan freeman is the creepiest damn thing i've ever seen

I agree - what's with the not having eyes? Is there some allusion I'm not getting?

by **sje46** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 5:48 pm UTC

Felstaff wrote:
ThemePark wrote:
sje46 wrote:Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not. Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

Sure we do. Doesn't everybody?

...

Umm, what's Walmart?

by **Spike13** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 7:16 pm UTC

Hahaha! Hilarious

Okay, now I want a Morgan Freeman text-to-speech program.
-JayDee

Ditto. Not many other people would suffice

by **lizzie14** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 8:28 pm UTC

My goal in life is to have a commercial of myself narrated by Morgan Freeman. I feel as though that is the highest level of self-actualization someone in our modern society can achieve. Congrats, Michael Phelps.

by **jqavins** » Thu Aug 14, 2008 10:53 pm UTC

sje46 wrote:Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not.

Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

Well, no, not really. We're all a bunch of complete liars, here only to annoy you. Sound implausible? Good!

Adding a bit to my list, echoing what others have written:

jqavins wrote:I have this, but with many actors chosen at random for a day. Patrick Stewart is a frequent visitor. But then so is Adam West. Connery, yes. Meg Griffin, no, but Lois. And Brian. Many others, too numerous and infrequent to mention, or even recall. Morgan Freeman? Well, not before now...

Garrison Keilor on a good day. Gilbert Godfey on a bad one. Strangely, not James Earl Jones; you'd think, I certainly wouldn't mind, but he doesn't come around. Schatner from the '80s and Nimoy from the 60's. I'm sometimes hopelessly clueless; I wouldn't know Jeremy Irons's voice if it did show up in my head (and I'm usually better with famous voices than faces; I wouldn't know Irons's face even if he walked up to me and said "Hi, I'm Jeremy Irons.")

TheAntiElite wrote:[ text deleted ] and on a truly spectacular occasion, Peter Cullen.

Irritation has been infrequently narrated by Pat Sajak.

When I read this, I thought Bill Cullen, who has been around once in a while. And I think I've had Pat Sajak once (and not particularly irritating.)

But the thing is, I never pick them They show up unbidden, at random. So really, the whole phenomenon can be both cool and irritating.

Has anyone else noticed that most of the voices are male (and this is from all the posters)? I wonder why this is?

by **Turiya** » Fri Aug 15, 2008 12:02 am UTC

sje46 wrote:Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not.

Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

Yes. They tell us to kill you. :twisted:

(Actually the voices in my head are afraid of me.)

Has no one really said, "MORGAN FREEMAN, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!" yet? Then I won't say it either...but is there a snippet of Randall's voice anywhere on the net? Because we might as well really have him in our heads once and for all.

by **ThemePark** » Fri Aug 15, 2008 12:24 am UTC

Turiya wrote:
sje46 wrote:Umm, I'm wondering if you guys are actually serious or not.

Do you guys really hear voices of celebrities?

Yes. They tell us to kill you.

(Actually the voices in my head are afraid of me.)

Has no one really said, "MORGAN FREEMAN, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!" yet? Then I won't say it either...but is there a snippet of Randall's voice anywhere on the net? Because we might as well really have him in our heads once and for all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJOS0sV2a24

Enjoy.

by **insom** » Fri Aug 15, 2008 12:43 pm UTC

Hawknc wrote:Freemanic Paracusia isn't so bad. G-manic Paracusia, on the other hand, sucks. It takes twice as long to read anything.

That can-happ en some times-wh en you get spac-ingall mix edup, amo ngother things.

by **Felstaff** » Fri Aug 15, 2008 12:47 pm UTC

insom wrote:
Hawknc wrote:Freemanic Paracusia isn't so bad. G-manic Paracusia, on the other hand, sucks. It takes twice as long to read anything.

That can-happ en some times-wh en you get spac-ingall mix edup, amo ngother things.

We'll see

about that.

by **mikekearn** » Fri Aug 15, 2008 1:16 pm UTC

HalfWayDownTheStairs wrote:
protocoach wrote:I think I'd prefer Jeremy Irons, but Morgan Freeman would have to come in a close second.

I have to agree. But would that be Ironic Paracusia?

As hilarious as this whole thread is, it was "Ironic Paracusia" that actually made me bust up and laugh out loud, something I try to avoid in the middle of the night when everyone else is asleep.

So thanks a lot for that.

by **Sprocket** » Fri Aug 15, 2008 3:00 pm UTC

libra wrote:When I read the title, my eyes betrayed me. I read the words as "Freemasonic Paranoia."

Morgan Freeman is the cryptonite of the Free Masons.

by **kanavazk** » Fri Aug 15, 2008 4:39 pm UTC

You mean 'Kryptonite'. But yeah.

by **Firnagzen** » Sat Aug 16, 2008 4:42 am UTC

Felstaff wrote:
insom wrote:
Hawknc wrote:Freemanic Paracusia isn't so bad. G-manic Paracusia, on the other hand, sucks. It takes twice as long to read anything.

That can-happ en some times-wh en you get spac-ingall mix edup, amo ngother things.

We'll see

about that.

It seemsss thatI 've just been infec- ted...

by **Steve the Pocket** » Sat Aug 23, 2008 2:34 am UTC

OK this is weird. In the past few days, I've started developing something like this myself. Now I hear all my internal rants in the voice, tone, and speed of Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw of Zero Punctuation. I suppose I would call this "Manic Paracusia."

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