Boy Thread: put a hat on ur butt

[Castaway]

Bacon - Indisputably the manliest food EVAR.

I believe beef jerky may challenge bacon for the manliest food ever, if for no other reason than that cows are bigger (and ergo harder to kill) than pigs.

[Bakemaster]

Cows harder to kill than pigs? You ever wrassled a pig, boy?

No, I haven't either, but it needed to be said. Cows spend their time standing around vacantly; pigs spend their time getting all slippery with mud.

[Castaway]

have you ever wrestled a cow? People fight bulls and lose. Nobody loses a fight to a pig.

[Cheese]

wow

I'ts really not taken long to get this thread up and running and get manly discussions going
We're already better than the clubhouse!

[Bakemaster]

Bulls are not cows.

[Castaway]

Yeah, but I'm sure they make jerky out of both.

[TRM]

Anyone? Anyone?

No, I didn't think so.

[Castaway]

That thing got its ass kicked by a child. Besides, I think that may be the monster from Princess Mononoke.

[mrguy753]

That thing got its ass kicked by a child. Besides, I think that may be the monster from Princess Mononoke.

Oh my god! the first thing i thought of was princess mononoke too!

Oh, and.. umm...... penis. (just tryin to stay on-topic)

[TigerX]

Bruce Willis and Brad Pitt.
Why have they not been in a movie together?

They have... It was called Twelve Monkeys.

And no, it wasn't really that good.

I know all those words, but that last sentence makes no sense. Maybe try a spell checker?[...]

Maybe you could suggest which word in the last sentence is misspelled. Other than sloppy syntax (a misplaced "really"), I'm not sure what your problem is.

[Cheese]

They spelled 'good' wrong.
It should be O-R-G-A-S-M-I-C or something, that's a much more fun word

[TigerX]

They spelled 'good' wrong.
It should be O-R-G-A-S-M-I-C or something, that's a much more fun word

For the record, the critics agree with you. I stand by my opinion as I spelled it though. Chalk it up to bad experience if you'd like.

[Belial]

Also, doesn't every man make plans for what they're going to do if they ever happen to come into ruling the world?

Yes. Neutron bombing 98 percent of the populace features large.

I think it's safe to say the xkcd kids are safe.

Not THAT many. You need to keep some around for your personal guard. And to maintain your Zeppelin! fleet. And to do other menial tasks not suited to the elite ruling class.

I think one or two zeppelins should suit me fine. Not like I need to be protected from some other country. They're all dead.

[Dibley]

Okay, so I've only encountered two groups of guys really.

Camp Guys. And South Geeks guys.

The guys at camp LOVED to be naked. They would be naked ALL the time. Sit around watching TV in the camp lounge or playing fuzball, or whatever naked.
The South Geek guys (geeks in Louisiana and Texas) are always all "WTF" when I tell them that. And that obviously they're all gay (it WAS a boyscout camp*).

Soo...
Nakedness? Is it only acceptable when a girl is there? Or is it manly to be naked?

Naked is awesome. Where inconvenient, shirtless is acceptable.

I went to a Conservative Christian Boarding Academy (kinda sucked in many ways). Although any genuine gayness would be heavily discriminated against, fake/joking gayness was very common. Also nakedness was rampant in the guys dorm. Clothes weren't just optional, they were heavily discouraged. Also, passing the showers (communal, no stalls, just a large tile room) when certain (very straight) people were present was just asking to get tackled by soapy naked men. Kinda odd.

I don't think anyone here has mentioned working out. We're all nerdz, so I doubt there are any body builders, but does anyone do push-ups? Weight training? Running?

I do a set of 50 push-ups whenever I think about it, which amounts to about every other day, though last summer I did it ~6 times daily, amounting to a hell of a lot of push-ups, and sore arms. I'm not very good at establishing good habits, though.

[gmalivuk]

Pigs can be nasty, nasty animals. For one thing, a hungry enough pig sees you as food. A starving bull is still going to turn its nose up at something so meaty.

Men overall do tend to be more pro-naked. Many nudist and naturist groups enforce a strict 1-1 ratio to prevent the otherwise inevitable male majority from making any women present feel uncomfortable. This is likely the result of social expectations, but it's no less true for that.

[the Cow]

Pigs can be nasty, nasty animals.

Having cared for a small herd of pigs, I wholeheardedly agree. Just smart enough to be effectively evil, just dumb enough to get 'et.

[Belial]

Pigs can be nasty, nasty animals.

Having cared for a small herd of pigs, I wholeheardedly agree. Just smart enough to be effectively evil, just dumb enough to get 'et.

My friend had a vietnamese potbelly. It tried to eat my foot on three different occasions.

And those fuckers have TEETH.

I think I will go eat some bacon out of spite.

[the Cow]

I think I will go eat some bacon out of spite.

I tried to eat a portion of one of the pigs I cared for - largely out of spite. But memories of it wallowing deep in its own crap kept my appetite well in check.

Of course, I must give the forces at work some credit. Pigs turn slop into bacon. If that ain't a miracle, I don't know what is.

[Oort]

That thing got its ass kicked by a child. Besides, I think that may be the monster from Princess Mononoke.

Let's be fair. The kid had a freakin' GUN. In an even wrassling match, he would lose, no challenge.

As for exercise:
I do very little. Sometimes I do sit-ups and push ups, or go swimming. I also have dragonboat on Sundays, which is basically paddling for an hour. I used to be pretty fat, until I started taking gym class regularly. I also discovered that simply not eating junk food works too. Also, weight lifting, infrequently. Just frequently enough so that it makes a difference, but not a big difference.

[joeframbach]

Re: exercise

I used to do a regimen of 20 pushups / 50 crunches / 20 pullups every night, but I realized quickly that the pushups were detrimental to my rock climbing. I have a loft bed, and now I use the bottom of it to do a regimen of pullups in 6 different angles each night. It works all the major muscles and it pretty effective. I also hang under the bed and do crunches.

[Root5]

I've started running this summer. First time I gave up after one lap. Now I can do 2 km in 25 minutes

I hope there is a mistake somewhere here, because I WALK faster than that.

I'll measure the track, which I assumed was ~500 meters.

Another manly thing is guns. Guns, anyone? I live in Canada, and I'm 18, so I don't have many good gun stories. Anyone?

[joeframbach]

I've started running this summer. First time I gave up after one lap. Now I can do 2 km in 25 minutes

I hope there is a mistake somewhere here, because I WALK faster than that.

Yeah I was going to say something about that too but I didn't want to unintentionally offend anyone.
Another cool thing to do with a track is to run for 30 minutes and see how far you can get in that time, rather than trying to complete a set distance in a certain amount of time.

[parkaboy]

stuff stuff stuff my rock climbing. more stuff.

i would LOVE to get into rock climbing. i went once, indoors, for my bro's birthday party and i LOVED IT. not to mention rock climbers get lovely muscles. the gear is so expensive though =( i'd never seen a $300 rope til i started checking it all out.

[Mighty Jalapeno]

Bruce Willis and Brad Pitt.
Why have they not been in a movie together?

They have... It was called Twelve Monkeys.

And no, it wasn't really that good.

I know all those words, but that last sentence makes no sense. Maybe try a spell checker?[...]

Maybe you could suggest which word in the last sentence is misspelled. Other than sloppy syntax (a misplaced "really"), I'm not sure what your problem is.

Well, you said 12 Monkeys really wasn't that good. Now, since it WAS really good, I can only assume you mis-spelled "was" by putting some extra letters on the end of it. Any spell-checker should have caught that.

[wing]

I've started running this summer. First time I gave up after one lap. Now I can do 2 km in 25 minutes

I hope there is a mistake somewhere here, because I WALK faster than that.

I'll measure the track, which I assumed was ~500 meters.

Another manly thing is guns. Guns, anyone? I live in Canada, and I'm 18, so I don't have many good gun stories. Anyone?

Not mine, but my little brother and his friends were out shooting in the valley (we have permission to use the area as a gun range). Some of the guns weren't registered. Being young (18) they made it sound like WW3. Some prick neighbor called the property owner, who told them to get stuffed, and then called the cops about it. Cops went over to the property owner's house, he told THEM to get stuffed, because he allows target shooting and hunting on his property. Cops went over anyway. First cop there was a nervous dick (supervisor). Second cop there, whom the supervisor referred to as his "gun expert" arrived. Dude isn't more than 20. He tells the supervisor that he'll take care of things ("and for christ's sake, they aren't even anywhere near the guns, take your hand off of yours."). Supervisor reluctantly leaves. The remaining cop then proceeds to JOIN THEM in cocking off and shooting things for the next 2 hours. Once they're out of ammo, he's just like "all of these are registered, right?" "yep" "Okay then, I'm outta here."

[Cosmonaut Smut Peddler]

Re giant pig: From what I heard, the pig was so huge it barely moved, they led the kid to where the pig was chilling, and he used the gun mentioned earlier to "pop a cap in his bitch ass." Thus the hunt for the great pig was more equivalent to shooting a fat, lazy fish in a diminutive barrel. Not manly. See: THE MAN-TASTIC MR. RIPPY vs BOBCAT!

Re exercise: I don't do much, but I'll be running 3 miles daily starting tomorrow and soon after I'll start swimming. I used to bench but very light, I'll be focusing more on push-ups, sit-ups, and other weight-less exercises. The gym's for meat heads.

EDIT; Re GUNZ: I always enjoyed guns from a young age, easily graduating from play sound guns, to dart and water guns, to pellet and bb guns, and finally to real guns. I think it's similar to the man-hobby of blowing things up. My only gun story is that one day we were out in a field shooting cans meanwhile on the other side of the field, about 500 meters?, there were some harmless oil dereks. A couple of times when I aimed for a coke can, it shot through and hit the derek. Unfortunately... that stopped the derek. It sat still until my uncle shot through another can and pegged it a second time, then it started moving again. That's about it.

[joeframbach]

stuff stuff stuff my rock climbing. more stuff.

i would LOVE to get into rock climbing. i went once, indoors, for my bro's birthday party and i LOVED IT. not to mention rock climbers get lovely muscles. the gear is so expensive though =( i'd never seen a $300 rope til i started checking it all out.

I'm glad someone pointed out rock climbing. Many consider it a manly sport but it really isn't gender-specific at all. Rock Climbing works all those muscles that really stand out. The huge shoulders are a plus, and nobody cares about triceps any more. We're bringing triceps back, yeah!

I climb at an indoor place in the university gym. It only costs $1US for admission since it's covered by university insurance and whatnot. Public gyms charge upwards of $10 for a single admission! Ridiculous! Check out your university if you want to get into it. Most (if not all) universities have some sort of outdoors club, or some student group that likes to climb, sometimes at a discount.

[Castaway]

I run, but only for school. I'm good at it, but I don't enjoy it, so I go from 40 mile weeks to nothing come december.

re. bobcat guy, he didn't even go to the hospital afterwards.

[chrispy1]

is it not true that pigs can eat through bone? I heard once that a (group?) of pigs can actually devour a human (bones and everything) in 5 minutes. Mmm...let's see - pig or cow, pig or cow. Cow tipping it is!

And yeah, I'm with Belial about going to have bacon now. Only all I've got is pancetta....even better!!

[Mighty Jalapeno]

is it not true that pigs can eat through bone? I heard once that a (group?) of pigs can actually devour a human (bones and everything) in 5 minutes. Mmm...let's see - pig or cow, pig or cow. Cow tipping it is!

And yeah, I'm with Belial about going to have bacon now. Only all I've got is pancetta....even better!!

See: Pickton Pig Farm Massacre... BC's worst mass murderer. I grew up down the road from there.

[mrguy753]

Naked is awesome. Where inconvenient, shirtless is acceptable.

I went to a Conservative Christian Boarding Academy (kinda sucked in many ways). Although any genuine gayness would be heavily discriminated against, fake/joking gayness was very common. Also nakedness was rampant in the guys dorm. Clothes weren't just optional, they were heavily discouraged. Also, passing the showers (communal, no stalls, just a large tile room) when certain (very straight) people were present was just asking to get tackled by soapy naked men. Kinda odd.

Sounds like some crazy gay teenage fantasy. Wait, not just sounds like. It is. I'm sure there was more than one very happy closeted gay living there.

[chrispy1]

ETA: Reply to Mighty Jalapeno...
yup, that's probably where I heard about it (good old Globe and Mail - don't hold back on any of the details!! )

ETA b:

Sounds like some crazy gay teenage fantasy. Wait, not just sounds like. It is. I'm sure there was more than one very happy closeted gay living there.

Yeah, prolly the guy that's done 1st year like 6 times

[mrguy753]

ETA b:

Sounds like some crazy gay teenage fantasy. Wait, not just sounds like. It is. I'm sure there was more than one very happy closeted gay living there.

Yeah, prolly the guy that's done 1st year like 6 times

that sounds like a plan..
*goes to look up nearest all-male boarding school*

[ks_physicist]

Nobody loses a fight to a pig.

You've apparently never been around an irritated boar.

[ks_physicist]

Anyone? Anyone?

No, I didn't think so.

That poor pig was a pet, that had been released into the "preserve" just a few weeks before being killed. (The hunter was apparently not aware of this.)

He was probably trotting over to the humans to see if they were going to give him a treat.

I'm no vegetarian, but once I read about that pig, I felt very, very sad. What a terrible fate for a pet.

[Castaway]

is it not true that pigs can eat through bone? I heard once that a (group?) of pigs can actually devour a human (bones and everything) in 5 minutes. Mmm...let's see - pig or cow, pig or cow. Cow tipping it is!

Who though of Snatch at this post?

[the Cow]

Cow tipping it is!

Cool! Are you a good tipper?

[Cosmonaut Smut Peddler]

re. bobcat guy, he didn't even go to the hospital afterwards.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure when you strangle a rabid bobcat, you feel pretty good. Scratch pretty, probably (as someone said on this fora) hotoldersisterfucking-good.

Who though of Snatch at this post?

Good taste in movies itt. I thought the same thing.

[Dibley]

Re: exercise

I used to do a regimen of 20 pushups / 50 crunches / 20 pullups every night, but I realized quickly that the pushups were detrimental to my rock climbing. I have a loft bed, and now I use the bottom of it to do a regimen of pullups in 6 different angles each night. It works all the major muscles and it pretty effective. I also hang under the bed and do crunches.

How would pushups be detrimental for rock climbing? About the only way I can imagine is that it isn't very helpful (probably true, as it's the wrong muscles) and makes you heavier (bigger muscles). That doesn't seem like a significant effect, but perhaps I'm overlooking something. I just do pushups because pecs are sex, and I can't be arsed to do any other exercise other than running/climbing.

Sounds like some crazy gay teenage fantasy. Wait, not just sounds like. It is. I'm sure there was more than one very happy closeted gay living there.

Only if you're pretty friendly with your hand. A few years back a nephew of one of the administrator was caught having teh butsehks with another guy, and they were both expelled and sent to counseling. Pretty fucked up. I did know a few bi/lesbian girls, and they quite enjoyed it. Although there might be a bit less soapy tackling, there was plenty of nudity in the girls dorm.

[mrguy753]

Sounds like some crazy gay teenage fantasy. Wait, not just sounds like. It is. I'm sure there was more than one very happy closeted gay living there.

Only if you're pretty friendly with your hand. A few years back a nephew of one of the administrator was caught having teh butsehks with another guy, and they were both expelled and sent to counseling. Pretty fucked up. I did know a few bi/lesbian girls, and they quite enjoyed it. Although there might be a bit less soapy tackling, there was plenty of nudity in the girls dorm.

I'm sure they could find a way to be really discrete about it. And the hand would most likely be a good friend to hypothetical gay teen. That, and a tiny portable camera.