xkcd

by **mieulium** » Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:37 am UTC

Because the sky's so high! ~

How do you breathe?

by **Kohlliah** » Tue Feb 02, 2010 1:46 pm UTC

Using a small crocheted doily.

When is naptime?

by **mirni** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 7:50 am UTC

Nap time is never long enough.

Why does my left arm hurt but not my right one?

-m-

by **WholeLottaSean** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 2:36 pm UTC

Because its a heart attack.

Have you called an ambulance?

by **Kohlliah** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 5:03 pm UTC

Small pieces of lint.

Will my hair dry before class starts?

by **Akolas** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 4:23 am UTC

Only if your current crush isn't taking that class.

What's the best color?

by **Kohlliah** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 4:35 am UTC

String.

Why do I always have the most homework on the nights that I am most tired?

by **Krong** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 5:44 am UTC

Those are the nights when it's least tired -- your homework sleeps when you don't.

Am I going to remember to read the response to this question?

by **Vohu Manah** » Fri Feb 05, 2010 4:07 am UTC

You have reached our customer service line. Since all our ScamCorp employees are currently busy, please call back later to speak to our customer care representatives who will address your queries. Thank you, and have a nice day. Press 1 for more options.

Yes or No?

by **Kohlliah** » Fri Feb 05, 2010 4:41 am UTC

Blue.

Should I wear pink tomorrow?

by **Stellator** » Sun Feb 07, 2010 6:23 pm UTC

Retrospectively, God no. Should've listened to me in advance.

Did you wear pink in the end?

by **itaibn** » Sun Feb 07, 2010 6:53 pm UTC

The long end.

What's the best programming language?

by **Kohlliah** » Sun Feb 07, 2010 7:02 pm UTC

uncooked macaroni. i always program in uncooked macaroni.

Why do I still have a cold after 6 days?

by **Stellator** » Sun Feb 07, 2010 9:46 pm UTC

Probably from programming in all that uncooked macaroni.

What's pink and fluffy?

by **brakos82** » Sun Feb 07, 2010 9:51 pm UTC

Bill Clinton.

Why do we have daylight savings?

by **Stellator** » Sun Feb 07, 2010 10:33 pm UTC

So we don't spend it all on moon pie and penny whistles.

Why do I always end up distracted by stupid web games when I'm trying to work?

by **Vohu Manah** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 4:36 am UTC

Because you would otherwise be productive, and the Man would find you.

Why is my project not done?

by **Quizatzhaderac** » Tue Mar 20, 2012 2:36 pm UTC

Vohu Manah wrote:Because you would otherwise be productive, and the Man would find you.

Why is my project not done?

Because there are no endings in the turning of the wheel.

If Jimmy cracked corn, and nobody cared, why did he keep doing it?

by **Kromix** » Tue Mar 20, 2012 3:55 pm UTC

because he liked crack

if i would with the wool of wood why would i would do woo?

by **Badion** » Mon Apr 02, 2012 6:26 pm UTC

Woo is provocative and you could not resit its seductive charms.

Where is the world is Carmen San Francisco and what the hell happened to her sister who married that Diego fella?

by **darknut** » Tue Apr 03, 2012 6:33 am UTC

the former struggles to live under her sisters infamous shadow, the latter has spent the last several years in solitary confinement

why did ted san fransico name both his daughters carmen

by **LOLBeth** » Wed Apr 04, 2012 3:35 am UTC

Because one was a mezzo and the other one wasn't.

How Long is a Chinaman.

by **Badion** » Wed Apr 04, 2012 3:45 pm UTC

Shorter than an Irishman

From whence came the idea that all people are people?

by **Snark** » Wed Apr 04, 2012 4:16 pm UTC

Some people thought it up and passed the idea onto other people.

Why is Wikipedia so smart?

by **Kyreles** » Wed Apr 04, 2012 8:13 pm UTC

Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject. So you know you are getting the best possible information.

Why isn't Pi a whole number?

by **Snark** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 2:42 pm UTC

Because if it was, too many mathematicians would fall in.

What's a four letter word for boredom?

by **Mike Rosoft** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 6:38 pm UTC

Zzzz ...

What's the difference between a crow?

by **LOLBeth** » Mon Apr 09, 2012 10:26 pm UTC

Three-eighths of a raven, unless modified by a writing-desk.

Why doesn't this monitor show me alternate dimensional planes?

by **Snark** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 12:13 am UTC

Because planes operate using yaw, pitch, and roll and would be incapable of moving in or moving to any fourth or higher dimensions, or alternate ones.

What is the answer to this question?

by **Damarco** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 4:16 am UTC

No, simply no. Do not cry, it wasn't your fault, but be strong in the face of no and carry on.

Where have all the flowers gone?

by **Kyreles** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 4:28 am UTC

They've been dealt with. The messed with the wrong guy and got what they had coming.

How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?

by **cjquines** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 5:58 am UTC

You're trying to give it CPR by pressing the correct buttons in the correct order very quickly to give the batteries life. Duh!

Why do eyes blink?

by **Snark** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 1:54 pm UTC

Because feet do an awful job of it.

Where is infinity?

by **Badion** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 5:29 pm UTC

just beyond i

How far into a forest can you run before you start running out?

by **Kyreles** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 5:55 pm UTC

There is no point you can run out. If you ever try to leave, or stop going farther in, the raptors will find you.

What happens if you put buttered toast on the back of a cat and drop it? Which side will land down?

by **LOLBeth** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 9:58 pm UTC

The cat will lick all the butter off in mid-fall, then land on its feet safely, since there's no more butter interfering with ordinary feline physics.

Why do cats always target the most allergic person in the room?

by **Snark** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 10:10 pm UTC

Because all cats are posessed by Satan.

What is the most random number?

by **Badion** » Tue Apr 10, 2012 11:28 pm UTC

10010101001010001010100101010010101001010111001010100101001010100101010100101010100101010010010001001010101001010101010001010100001010100101010101

What does that say in Binary?

by **darknut** » Thu Apr 12, 2012 8:18 am UTC

thats offencive, why would you say that

why did Badion say that

Spoiler:

by **Kyreles** » Mon Apr 16, 2012 1:41 pm UTC

Why Badion does the things he does is a mystery to all but the most acomplished psychotherapists. Mostly because he seeks approval from strong male authority figures and has a lustful desire to consure cheese.

Why do birds hop around on the ground instead of just walking?

Who is online