0305: "Rule 34"

[TV4Fun]

How about porn involving geek girls and geek boys together. That I am sure is completely nonexistent, in clear violation of rule 34.

[Platypodes]

How about porn involving geek girls and geek boys together. That I am sure is completely nonexistent, in clear violation of rule 34.

That, sir, is a very, very good point.

[Gadren]

Of course, Rule 34 only applies to things which exist...

*waits for EMP Cannon to fry his laptop*

(I've actually heard this argument used for why Rule 34 doesn't apply to the Zelda animated series.)

[Arcanior]

This is great.
I'm talking to a bored girl owning a shower, a guitar and a camera. Pictures will be on soon.

[Bubbles]

THOMAS THE TANK ENGINE PORN LIIIIIIIIIIVES!

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y31/Ff ... Thomas.jpg

Toomasu! Toomasu! AAAAAAA! Oh! Oh! Oh! Ah! Ah! Ah! Shyuubo! Shyuubo! Shyuubo! Un! Un! Un! ZUN!

[nitha]

It has recently come to my attention that there is a song titled "Rule 34" sung by a group called Sugar Fix, a powerpop group on Amie Street (a website touting music for sale). This song is currently free because no one has bought it (that's how the site works). So, if you're interested, go look it up -- it's not really my style. I just found this humorous.

I hope I'm the first to post on this thread regarding such a song.

[eidlyn]

I reread this comic so I could make a post to wet riffs, and realised a point of this comic that was off-base as far as guitar function goes; since the writer of this comic is an ex-physicist, i hope this post will be taken as interesting instead of anal retentive. Maybe interestingly anal retentive. I'll meet you half way.

Since the signal from an electric guitar is produced by a thin nickel string vibrating (albeit quickly) several millimetres away from a small magnet, (which picks up the sound, sends it through a series of capacitors and variable resistors which siphons off many wave frequencies and then is sent out to be boosted by an amplifier) the average output of a guitar, with little variation due to the large number of tele's and strats, is approximately 100 mV. A very small percent of guitars do have a preamp boost, used almost exclusively by thrashers and shredders or Clapton-wannabes, but these are powered by a 9-volt and can run for over 5000 hours, if this gives you any idea as to how low the output is. Much higher than .1 V will overload and choke the amp anyway. Esentially, you couldn't shock a baby enough to wake it even if Buckethead was playing.

The primary reason for waterproofing your guitar is so it wouldn't warp the wood the minute you brought it into the bathroom. The only way you could actively play in the shower is with a carbon fibre or glass guitar (glass guitars are bloody wicked, btw). This way you could seal off the electronics and not risk serious water damage to your guitar. Next stop, deep sea guitar porn.

One question I have, though, is, is wet riffs still being checked?

[theresnoiinjesse]

Anyone know if this site is still being checked? I submitted a picture perhaps three months ago, with no response.

Has anyone else submitted pictures since the last time it was updated?

[Otto]

Anybody else notice that wetriffs.com is expired?

http://whois.domaintools.com/wetriffs.com

[WXsniper]

Anybody else notice that wetriffs.com is expired?

http://whois.domaintools.com/wetriffs.com

Looks like it was renewed a couple days ago.

[grottylittlewanker]

I reread this comic so I could make a post to wet riffs, and realised a point of this comic that was off-base as far as guitar function goes; since the writer of this comic is an ex-physicist, i hope this post will be taken as interesting instead of anal retentive. Maybe interestingly anal retentive. I'll meet you half way.

Since the signal from an electric guitar is produced by a thin nickel string vibrating (albeit quickly) several millimetres away from a small magnet, (which picks up the sound, sends it through a series of capacitors and variable resistors which siphons off many wave frequencies and then is sent out to be boosted by an amplifier) the average output of a guitar, with little variation due to the large number of tele's and strats, is approximately 100 mV. A very small percent of guitars do have a preamp boost, used almost exclusively by thrashers and shredders or Clapton-wannabes, but these are powered by a 9-volt and can run for over 5000 hours, if this gives you any idea as to how low the output is. Much higher than .1 V will overload and choke the amp anyway. Esentially, you couldn't shock a baby enough to wake it even if Buckethead was playing.

The primary reason for waterproofing your guitar is so it wouldn't warp the wood the minute you brought it into the bathroom. The only way you could actively play in the shower is with a carbon fibre or glass guitar (glass guitars are bloody wicked, btw). This way you could seal off the electronics and not risk serious water damage to your guitar. Next stop, deep sea guitar porn.

One question I have, though, is, is wet riffs still being checked?

Tons of basses have active electronics as well, and the difference isn't so much in voltage as it is current. Active electronics allows the output to go through more crap before it starts degrading the sound quality of your moozak.

I think if you didn't waterproof the guitar, then some droplets would easily drop through little cavities and get to the electronics.

I know of bass strings that have special coatings that would be nice for this deep sea guitar playing, hehe.

Anyways, I came looking for this discussion board because there is a porn that I can't find! I think I need to get into the business.

[mathmagician]

Wanting something bad enough does not make it real.

Although. The amount of Family Guy porn is truly staggering. So much so that recently, Louis Griffin B.E. porn manifested itself. Have you seen it? I know exactly how Brian Griffin felt as his jaw hit the table.
a weird reference befitting this post:
"Now I want you to think of Lindsey Lohan, naked, doing a crab walk"

[grottylittlewanker]

Wanting something bad enough does not make it real.

well, it does if you want it bad enough to make it real

[ivucica]

Since submission at wetriffs doesn't work, may I suggest this one I randomly stumbled into?

http://www.demotivateus.com/awesome-she ... al-poster/

[webgiant]

"If it exists, there is porn of it. No exceptions."

Thing is .. what would gas chromatography porn *look* like?

Most of it is bestiality porn (nude mice): http://www.springerlink.com/content/p15567813q470294/

The detail that the website URL contains the word "Springer" is completely unrelated to the old "Jerry Springer" show.

I'm particularly amused by the fact that it's the chick who decides to go ahead and make the porn.

women are major producers in the porn industry.

You'd know this if you've spent any time in the slash-fic areas of LJ. On that note, NC17 xkcd fic would be hot. I can see it now. But please leave nerd girl out of it. She's perfect just as she is.

Sorry. Rule 34 dictates that the XKCD nerd girl has porn of her somewhere (by now, at any rate).

[webgiant]

"Storm-chaser porn" seems to predate the XKCD comic by about as long as the existence of personal video cameras:

In search of the perfect storm
The race for ever more sensational "torn porn" is on
by Wayne Curtis


"Torn porn" is porn because some people are turned on by seemingly non-sexual objects (also see "crisis porn"). This means that XKCD did not actually inspire "storm-chaser porn" by mentioning that it did not exist, because, technically, it already did.

Broadcasters are turned on by high audience figures and strong Nielsen ratings, and you get more viewers when you show them "torn porn".

[webgiant]

My faith in Rule 34 has been shattered.

I was stunned to discover that, unless my google skills have failed me, nobody has photoshopped any naked pictures of Bill Gates.

Surely this would be an obvious thing to find online. Just obvious.

Rule 34 just says there's porn of it, not necessarily the type of porn you were thinking of yourself.

For example, Tux doing the appropriate thing to Bill Gates has been out on the Internet for years (NSFW! NSFW!).

I personally was a little surprised to discover what "Alan Rickman porn" consisted of, but then I had to be told at the age of 30 what "slash" was.

Rule 34-B (sometimes mistakenly referred to as "Rule 35") declares that the porn you were thinking of will be created shortly after you mention that you were thinking of it.

[Ringcaat]

Somewhere not too long ago, I saw or heard an allusion to this concept--that all porn exists on the internet--in the form of someone joking about Pac-Man slash fic. The speaker joked about shipping Pac-Man with the red ghost, Blinky. Little did they know that I've actually written what might be termed Pac-Man slash fic. Only for a very loose definition of slash, though, which includes heterosexual pairings and works with only romance, not sex proper. It's a novelette in eight chapters that 'ships' Ms. Pac-Man and Inky, the cyan ghost. I'm rather fond of it.

Since this is my fifth post, I guess I'm allowed to include a link. Please, feel no pressure whatsoever to click.

[Sprocket]

How many of these are posted in cubicles at Harmonix?

[Necromas]

As soon as I saw this video I immediately thought about wetriffs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=riwk5hp7iEw

Japanese schoolgirls dancing and playing guitar in the rain.

[phillipsjk]

I have been afraid to ask what "End User License Agreement" porn would look like.

[Nashoud]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GCf2_nYvAE

This is a music video I saw a few years ago containg guitar nudity in a shower. It`s not just the guitarist, but the entire band, too!

[darkspork]

I have been afraid to ask what "End User License Agreement" porn would look like.

It's called sadomasochism.

[pachinkoid]

see what you did, randall? are you happy now? are you?

oh god, my eyes!

[Argency]

Oh god! The pain comes in waves!

[Kutch]

My faith in Rule 34 has been shattered.

I was stunned to discover that, unless my google skills have failed me, nobody has photoshopped any naked pictures of Bill Gates.

Surely this would be an obvious thing to find online. Just obvious.

And the really disturbing thing about this is the fact that in just a few short years, I've gone from being surprised by the weird porn on the web to being surprised only by the weird porn that isn't there. And that it took me at least an hour to realize that there might possibly be anything funny about my being shocked to not see naked Bill Gates pics.

O webosphere, what hast thou done to me???

What are you talking about? Bill Gates porn has been around for years (since before your post at least). Google doesn't work well for everything, you know.
Specifically photoshop, though, I don't know, but I don't think that was the gist of your post.

[sonia]

I think everybody needs inspiration. Now, whether my white ass inspires you to actually take better pics yourself, or just to vomit, I don't care, but I want to see wetriffs go live (with better looking people).

Those in #xkcd have already suffered this, now it's time for those in the fora .

http://www.tawnos.com/images/xkcd

Probably NSFW, nor safe for lunch, nor safe for your retinas.

Enjoy

Oh God. (And no, it doesn't inspire me to take a better pic. I don't particularly want to wreck my guitar.)

[BigAl]

I can readily imagine a hot gal in the shower with nothing but her guitar. I also checked for wetriffs.com

[vaguelyhumanoid]

Interesting things I've found Rule 34 of:

Animaniacs (Yakko/Wakko)
Radiohead (yes, as in the band)
Hitler & Stalin (often together)
Christian Weston Chandler (usually gay, always for trolling purposes)

[Ggrogg]

My theory (which works very well along with Rule 34) is that there is nothing out there that you can do that some freak somewhere wouldn't find erotic, especially if you do it in your underwear or something (altho you don't have to.) You could put up a webcam of yourself working on your car and some whackjob would be like "Oh yeeeeah, grease those bolts for me baby!" If you were female and doing it in a bra and panties you'd be making all sorts of cash.

[adaviel]

According to New Scientist and his blog, Charlie Stross is just finishing a book based on this comic. Credit is given, in the NS article anyway.

[kralik]

Hello,

reviving this old thread (hope it's not againts rules, tl;dr) because I'd like to inform whoever is interested
that Randall possibly did not look good enough before writing this strip

See this music video by slovak band Horkýže Slíže:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GCf2_nYvAE

I'm not sure how old the strip actually is...

[SecondTalon]

The rules are not that long. Like, at all.

That said, no.. what you did is actually pointed out in the rules as the Thing To Do. You added New Relevant Information to an Existing Thread. Good job. Gold star.

[kralik]

Ok, I checked the rules... Also, I screwed up, the band's actually slovak (the language being compatible with czech I hastily regarded it as mothertongue lol) - fixed!

[BlackHatSupport]

Does anyone remember Rule 36?

"If rule 34 does not apply to something, re-read rule 34."

Or was that Rule 1?

[Pfhorrest]

Does anyone remember Rule 36?

"If rule 34 does not apply to something, re-read rule 34."

Or was that Rule 1?

No, Rule 1 is "The Doctor lies".

Rule 2 is "Double tap".

[Ndi]

Don't know if this was posted, but on wetriffs there's a pic RM calls edited.

Found the original: http://www.uncoached.com/wp-content/upl ... icks_9.jpg