xkcd

by **Kain** » Wed Jun 08, 2011 6:41 pm UTC

Glean
3U
Instant
Look at a card chosen at random from target player's hand. If it is a land, return Glean to its owner's hand. Otherwise, draw a card.
Something witty about having a famous land in your head

Next card: Imbibe

by **KrazyerKate** » Wed Jun 08, 2011 11:39 pm UTC

Imbibe 1B
Gain 15 life. You get an emblem that says "at the beginning of your upkeep, lose 1 life".
oh god dude, I have the worst hangover.

Next Card: Silly Hat

by **BurningLed** » Fri Jun 10, 2011 11:21 am UTC

Silly Hat
5
Artifact - Equipment

Equip 0

Equipped creature has -7/-3. Equipped creature is protected from all damage.

Next: Cougar Hunter

by **more_people** » Sat Jun 11, 2011 12:54 am UTC

Cougar Hunter
WW
Creature- Human Soldier
2/1

When Cougar Hunter attacks, it gets +2/+3 for every beast creature on defending players side of the field.
"The hunt begins."

NC: Statis Master

by **Kain** » Sat Jun 11, 2011 11:43 am UTC

Stasis Master (I assume you meant Stasis, which is how I read it originally)
WW
Creature - Human Cleric
T: Target creature you control gains "T: As long as this creature remains tapped, target permanent does not untap during its controller's untap step. You may choose not to untap this creature during your untap step."
0/3

Next Card: Venser's Sanctum

by **KrazyerKate** » Mon Jun 13, 2011 9:40 am UTC

Venser's Sanctum
Legendary Land
If a permanent you own would leave play in any other way than going to the graveyard, you may imprint it on Venser's Sanctum instead.
4, T: Put a card imprinted on Venser's Sanctum into play.
Famous for his mastery of the Blink, Venser found that his private abode had a habit of bringing things back from the aether at odd times

Next Card: Great Green Goo

by **musicman99** » Mon Jun 13, 2011 4:26 pm UTC

Great Green Goo
2GG
Creature- Goo
0/3
During your upkeep, you may put a 0/1 green goo creature token onto the battlefield with "Whenever this creature blocks or is blocked by a creature, that creature doesn't untap during its controller's next untap step."
~ gets +0/+1 for every goo creature on the battlefield
Whenever ~ blocks or is blocked by a creature, that creature doesn't untap during its controller's next untap step.
The best defence is one that stops your opponent. Permanently.

Next card: Breaking the fourth wall

by **KrazyerKate** » Mon Jun 13, 2011 8:22 pm UTC

Breaking The Fourth Wall 4U
Sorcery
Hey there, looks like you're playing Magic there! cool stuff, cool stuff. Listen, I'm really tired of always telling you how to play the game. I'm always all "destroy target creature" and "draw three cards". don't you ever get sick of me bossing you around? Lemme do what you want this time. Can I get you a beer? Maybe wrestle with that Baneslayer Angel over there for your entertainment? Anything you want, anything at all, just ask Cardy Joe over here, I'm your man. hey, don't worry man, you've earned it, always playing by the rules us cards set out for you. No? nothing? fine, well, I'll be over here in the Graveyard if you need anything. I'd be happy to help.
Jeez that Necrotic Ooze gives me the heebie jeebies. What's it even doing here? Shouldn't it be on the battlefield? Can't wait until that thing gets dredged.

Next Card: Long, Rambling Incantation

by **rrwoods** » Mon Jun 13, 2011 9:06 pm UTC

KrazyerKate wrote:Breaking The Fourth Wall 4U
Sorcery
Hey there, looks like you're playing Magic there! cool stuff, cool stuff. Listen, I'm really tired of always telling you how to play the game. I'm always all "destroy target creature" and "draw three cards". don't you ever get sick of me bossing you around? Lemme do what you want this time. Can I get you a beer? Maybe wrestle with that Baneslayer Angel over there for your entertainment? Anything you want, anything at all, just ask Cardy Joe over here, I'm your man. hey, don't worry man, you've earned it, always playing by the rules us cards set out for you. No? nothing? fine, well, I'll be over here in the Graveyard if you need anything. I'd be happy to help.
Jeez that Necrotic Ooze gives me the heebie jeebies. What's it even doing here? Shouldn't it be on the battlefield? Can't wait until that thing gets dredged.

... I don't even know where to start on templating this one :-P

J/K, of course. Nice card. :mrgreen:

Long, Rambling Incantation - 5U
Enchantment
Cumulative upkeep !U
Creatures your opponents control don't untap during their controllers' untap steps.
!U: Untap target creature. Any player may activate this ability, but only targeting a creature he or she controls.

Next: Karn Corrupted

by **KrazyerKate** » Tue Jun 14, 2011 6:13 pm UTC

Karn Corrupted 2 !w !u !b !r !g
Legendary Artifact Creature - Golem
Infect
Whenever Karn blocks or is blocked, it gets -4/+4 until end of turn.
1: Target nonartifact creature gains infect.
4/4

That's how wizards designs corrupted stuff, right? slap infect on it? I don't follow the story, but someone said that phyrexians can't be planeswalkers, so I can't do a Karn Liberated spinoff.

Next Card: Roerril Cactus -or- Karn Corrupted 2.0

by **Kain** » Wed Jun 15, 2011 1:57 am UTC

Karn Corrupted 2.0
5
Legendary Creature - Golem
At the beginning of each player's upkeep step, if that player controls a creature that has the highest power or is tied for the highest power among creatures in play, he or she gains control of ~.
Creatures you control are unblockable.
Whenever a creature you control attacks, it gets -X/-0 until the end of the turn, where X is that creature's power minus 1.
4/4
Attrition ... wearing down ... shadows ... GET OUT OF ...

Next Card: Soundweaver

by **Gypped** » Fri Jun 17, 2011 4:24 am UTC

Soundweaver
1U
Creature - Human Wizard
1/2

1, sacrifice ~: Choose new targets for target spell

Next Card: Clone Factory -or- Chocolate, CHOCOLATE? -or- Choices, Choices... -or- This//That (split card) -or- Stardust Token -or- Pandemonium, The Chaos Demon

by **hideki101** » Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:03 pm UTC

This//That

This - R
Instant

Deal 3 damage to target creature
//////////////////////
That - 3RRR
Instant

Choose a target creature on the battlefield. All other creatures on the battlefield take 3 damage.

Next card: Subterranean Sun

by **Kain** » Sun Jun 19, 2011 1:05 pm UTC

Subterranean Sun
Enchantment Land
If you are not poisoned, ~ has "T: Add 1 mana of any color a land you control could produce to your mana pool."
If you are poisoned, ~ has "T, gain a poison counter: Add 2 mana of any color to your mana pool."

Next Card: Troposphere Cruiser

by **KrazyerKate** » Sun Jun 19, 2011 1:28 pm UTC

Troposphere Cruiser 3
Artifact Creature - Construct
Flying
Creatures can block Troposphere Cruiser as if it didn't have flying.
3/3
I guess that *technically* you can say it has flight capabilities...

Next Card: Maggie's Magic Missile

by **Kain** » Sat Jun 25, 2011 6:46 am UTC

Maggie's Magic Missile
0
As an additional cost to play ~, discard any number of cards from your hand.
~ deals X damage to target creature or player, where X is the number of cards discarded.
(and in case that is broken, which I suspect that is:) Any number of your opponents may discard any number of cards from their hands. For each card discarded this way, prevent 1 damage that would be dealt by ~ to the target creature or player.

Next Card: Sizemore's Spade

by **KrazyerKate** » Sun Jun 26, 2011 10:22 pm UTC

Sizemore's Spade 3B
Artifact - Equipment
Equipped creature has "4B, T: Bury target creature".
Equip 2B
Gravediggers dig holes because people die. With Sizemore, people die because he digs holes.

Next Card: Pocket Dragon

by **eculc** » Mon Jun 27, 2011 4:46 am UTC

Pocket Dragon
1R
Creature - Dragon
Flying
R: Pocket Dragon gains +1/+0 until end of turn. this ability can't be used more than once per turn.
1/1
Yes, it's small. No, you can't have one.

Next card: Shadow stalker -OR- Shadow hunter

(edit @ below me: sorry, I was confused as to what to use for "any")

by **rrwoods** » Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:42 pm UTC

eculc wrote:Pocket Dragon
XR
Creature - Dragon
Flying
R: Pocket Dragon gains +1/+0 until end of turn. this ability can't be used more than once per turn.
1/1
Yes, it's small. No, you can't have one.

Next card: Shadow stalker -OR- Shadow hunter

The {X}! It does nothing!

by **Kain** » Fri Jul 01, 2011 5:32 am UTC

Shadow Hunter
XXWW
Creature - Angel
Flying
When ~ comes into play, put X +1/+1 on it, and each opponent puts X 1/1 black Shadow creature tokens onto the battlefield under their control.
If X was three or more, ~ has "T: Deal X damage to target non-white creature or target black creature, where X is the number of +1/+1 counters on ~.".
1/1

Next Card: Sorin, the Ancient

by **KrazyerKate** » Sat Jul 02, 2011 8:43 pm UTC

I only know Magic flavor, not story. Dunno if this is canonical or whatever.

Sorin, The Ancient 3BBB
Legendary Creature - Vampire
2B, T: Target player's life total becomes 10.
4/3
A great human captain must be able to organize his troops and lead them into battle. A great vampire elder need only be able to draw blood for the Hunters to chase.

Next Card: Blessed Masticore -OR- Flameborn Jouster -OR- Sorin, The Ancient

by **Kain** » Sun Jul 03, 2011 7:09 am UTC

KrazyerKate wrote:I only know Magic flavor, not story. Dunno if this is canonical or whatever.

Sorin, The Ancient 3BBB
Legendary Creature - Vampire
2B, T: Target player's life total becomes 10.
4/3
A great human captain must be able to organize his troops and lead them into battle. A great vampire elder need only be able to draw blood for the Hunters to chase.

Next Card: Blessed Masticore -OR- Flameborn Jouster -OR- Sorin, The Ancient

If you are interested, the Sorin in question is a planeswalker, but that card would probably make perfect sense for him in his pre-planeswalking days.

Flamebourne Jouster
2WR
Creature - Elemental Knight
WR: Flamebourne Jouster gets +3/+0 and first strike until the end of the turn, and must attack this turn if able. Play this ability only on your turn during the precombat main phase, and no more than once per turn.
1/2

(wow, trying to figure out the mechanics behind the idea of jousting is tough. best I could do was to make it like a knight who is okay at defending on his own, though subpar for his price, but who gets all mounted up on a horse and grabs a lance when it is time for battle. Needless to say, when it is not your combat step, but rather an opponents, one can assume he would not be expecting to battle.)

next card: Knight of the Inner Sanctum

by **KrazyerKate** » Sun Jul 03, 2011 12:34 pm UTC

Knight of the Inner Sanctum 1WW
Creature - Knight Cleric
Prevent all damage that would be dealt to Knight of the Inner Sanctum.
2/1

Next Card: The Birds and The Bees

by **Kain** » Sun Jul 03, 2011 12:59 pm UTC

KrazyerKate wrote:Knight of the Inner Sanctum 1WW
Creature - Knight Cleric
Prevent all damage that would be dealt to Knight of the Inner Sanctum.
2/1

Next Card: The Birds and The Bees

The Birds and The Bees
GGG
Tribal Enchantment - Beast
Tap two non-token green beast creatures you control. Put an X/Y green beast token into play, where X is the power of one of the tapped creatures, chosen at random, and Y is the toughness of one of the tapped creatures, chosen at random.

Next card: Soul of Morality

by **Gypped** » Sun Jul 03, 2011 1:55 pm UTC

Soul of Morality
W
Creature - Spirit
1/1

~ cannot attack or defend.
T: Target creature stays tapped until ~ untaps.
You may choose not to untap ~ during your upkeep.

Morals aren't particularly useful on the battlefield, but they are great for guilt tripping.

Spoiler:

Next Card: Soul of Bloodlust -or- Soul of Greed -or- Soul of Bloodshed -or- Soul of Magic

by **eculc** » Sun Jul 03, 2011 7:34 pm UTC

Soul of Bloodlust
1BBB
Enchantment
All creatures you control gain +1/-1. If this effect would reduce a creature's toughness to 0, do not apply this effect to that creature.

Next: Shadow Stalker

by **Kain** » Mon Jul 04, 2011 4:11 am UTC

Shadow Stalker
1BBB
Creature - Demon Horror
Shadow
Whenever Shadow Stalker deals combat damage to a player, that player reveals a card at random from his or her hand. If that card has less colored mana symbols in its casting cost than Shadow Stalker, that player discards the card, and discards the top card of his or her library. If the revealed card has the same or more colored mana symbols in its casting cost than Shadow Stalker, sacrifice Shadow Stalker, and that player draws a card.
3/1
It stalks the emptiest regions of the Blind Eternities, casting a devouring shadow over weak thoughts and beings.

Next Card: Prophet of Eternity

by **KrazyerKate** » Wed Jul 06, 2011 1:06 pm UTC

Prophet of Eternity RUG
Creature - Human Seer
When Prophet of Eternity comes into play, you may put up to three cards you own from outside the game on top of your library.
He sees a future very foreign to his own.

Next Card: Power Creep

by **Gypped** » Wed Jul 06, 2011 3:08 pm UTC

Power Creep
1
Enchantment - Aura

Enchant target creature that has the Level up ability.
Enchanted creature is tapped and has "This creature does not untap during your untap step. During each upkeep, add one level counter to enchanted creature."
1: Choose another target for ~ or sacrifice ~.

Next Card: <Name>, the Mystic Minstrel -or- Riddle Box -or- Puzzle Box -or- Buried Treasure

by **Kain** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 4:33 am UTC

Buried Treasure
3 (Visual: an excavation littered with bones in various forms of outfits, though lacking any fancy armor, all clearly killed violently. The skeletons surround a mostly unburied treasure chest, which is partially open, being kept from closing by the hand of the nearest skeleton (who has clearly been literally back stabbed while in the process of opening the chest. Try and portray the chest as almost sentient, and certainly evil: it wants people to find it, after which it causes them to turn on each other, and thereafter has a larger assortment of bait)
Artifact
When ~ comes into play, each player may search his or her library, graveyard and hand for any number of artifact cards, and exile them (template this such that Buried Treasure is the thing exiling the cards)
Exile ~: Staring with the opponent to your left and proceeding clockwise, each player puts an artifact exiled by ~ into play under their control. Continue this until each player has put an artifact into play this way, or there are no remaining artifacts exiled by ~.
(Some optimistic words by an adventurer about how they already checked for traps and didn't find any, and its not like they are going to turn on each other)

Next Card: Tri-Planar Wurm

by **KrazyerKate** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 4:51 pm UTC

Tri-Planar Wurm 6GGG
Creature - Wurm
When Tri-Planar Wurm comes into play, put two 6/6 green Wurm creature tokens into exile, one with 2 suspend counters on it and one with 4 suspend counters on it.
6/6

Next Card: Crazy John

by **Kain** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 5:36 pm UTC

KrazyerKate wrote:Tri-Planar Wurm 6GGG
Creature - Wurm
When Tri-Planar Wurm comes into play, put two 6/6 green Wurm creature tokens into exile, one with 2 suspend counters on it and one with 4 suspend counters on it.
6/6

Next Card: Crazy John

Wow... when I thought of that card name, I had no idea if it would even be able to be pulled off, but that is a very nice response (the templating is off a bit, as tokens can't exist outside of the battlefield iirc, but I get what you are going for)

Crazy John
1UR
Legendary Creature - Human Pirate
U/R: Flip a coin. If you win the flip, each opponent puts the top card of his or her library into their graveyard, and you draw a card. If you lose the flip, each opponent draws a card, and you put the top card of your library into your graveyard. If this is the second time this ability has been used this turn, put a -1/-1 counter on Crazy John. (Do not put a -1/-1 counter on Crazy John for each time after the second that this ability is used this turn).
2/2
You can find out anything you ever want to know if you know the right bars. The trick is to be sober enough not to give up information of your own, or drunk enough not to care.

Next Card: Sane Alan

by **KrazyerKate** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 9:45 pm UTC

Sane Alan 1UUU
Legendary Creature - Human Captain
Counter any spell or ability that would have you shuffle your library.
If you would flip a coin, instead play as if it came up heads.
You can't discard cards.
2/2
A mind is a terrible thing to waste

Next Card: Rocky Road

by **Kain** » Sun Jul 10, 2011 2:12 pm UTC

Rocky Road
Land
Rocky Road comes into play tapped.
T: Add 1 to your mana pool.
As long as Rocky Road is untapped, attacking creatures get +1/-1.

Next Card: Long Hiatus

by **KrazyerKate** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 9:48 am UTC

Long Hiatus 1W
Enchantment
Fading 5
When Long Hiatus comes into play, exile target creature.
When Long Hiatus leaves play, return the exiled creature into play under its owners' control.
At the beginning of your upkeep, the player that controlled the exiled creature gains 2 life.

Next Card: Stompy the Stegasaurus

by **BurningLed** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 11:08 am UTC

Stompy the Stegosaurus
3G
Creature - Dinosaur
3/3

T: Destroy target nonland permanent with converted mana cost 1 or less

Bonk!

Next: Vicious Cloth-Eating Piranhas

by **KrazyerKate** » Wed Jul 13, 2011 8:20 pm UTC

Vicious Cloth-Eating Piranhas 2B
Creature - Mutant Fish
Whenever a creature comes into play, if it is humanoid, put a -1/-1 counter on it.
"Those Dominarians have a strange tendency to wrap fabrics around their bodies. I can only see this causing problems for their militas." -- Jun-ara, Centaur Chieftain

Next Card: Hasidic Slime

by **Gypped** » Thu Jul 14, 2011 3:04 am UTC

Hasidic Slime
1B
Creature - Slime
1/1

T: Deal damage equal to ~'s attack to target attacking creature.
If a creature is sent to the graveyard by damage dealt by ~, add a +1/+1 counter to ~.

Only the slime knew why it was so territorial

Next Card: Dwarven Excavation Crew

by **KrazyerKate** » Thu Jul 14, 2011 9:39 am UTC

Dwarven Excavation Team 3R
Creature - Dwarf
3R, T, Sacrifice a mountain: Flip a coin. if you win the flip, you may search your library for an artifact card and put it into play. If you lose, sacrifice another mountain.

Next Card: Magic Wand

by **Kain** » Sun Jul 17, 2011 10:32 pm UTC

Magic Wand
0
Artifact - Equipment
Equip 0
Equipped Creature has "T: If this creature's controller yells 'wingardium leviosa' target creature gains flying until the end of the turn"
In nearly all playtests, no one would embarrass themselves enough to use said artifact

next card: Transoceanic Scrying

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