[SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

[superglucose]

I have never said "cis was a bad term" so that's a strawman. I've said I personally don't like it but I'm sure we all have words we don't like.

I have said "be careful not to let cis become a negative term because it's been heading that way in my experience" to which you said "no it's not." You are wrong. I have experienced what I've experienced.

[Brace]

But experienced reality doesn't always correspond to objective reality. Take color blindness, as a trivial example. No one is questioning your experiences, but you can hardly use them to directly justify as complex an assertion as you're trying to make.

[superglucose]

That people should be careful with the way they use words lest they become slurs?

Yes. I can see how this is a complex and difficult concept to grasp and how it's going to be so painful for everyone involved.

[Brace]

No, that the word cis is actually becoming a slur. It's an assertion which is slightly closer to the ground. Nice dodge though.

[superglucose]

I mentioned that I've seen people using Cis as a slur and you're telling me it's ok because not enough people are doing it. I mention that people should be careful about how they use cis because I see it becoming a slur all around me and no one seems to care. You say to me that you don't care.

Yeah, that seems likely. *I'm* the unreasonable one here.

I also mention that the argument that "cis" won't be a slur until it's used as often as "trans" is as a slur is a load of bollocks. Because it is.

[Brace]

There is some fundamental confusion, like a living thing deep inside your brain that needs to be broken. It gives you a seemingly boundless capacity for self-hatred.

Things you have done:

* Put words in my mouth (I haven't said anything about quantities of people doing one thing or another)
* Stated indignantly that people should automatically take your perception of the reality of something as sacrosanct
* Been extremely, violently combatative

Yes you're being unreasonable. You don't even know what reason is. That's probably a big part of why you're always showing off your insecurities

[TheGrammarBolshevik]

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This new registrar guy, he can stay.

[Aaeriele]

Monika, superglucose, Kilroy[ZTC], Vaniver - when Belial said "cut it out", he meant it. Seriously. This is a safespace thread, it is not the right place for an argument. Take it to PMs if you wish.

If you don't mind me asking, what are you doing in HK that calls for being there in the summer? IMO, the weather's much more pleasant in the winter; it's far too hot and humid in the summer (but I suppose it doesn't really matter because every place is air-conditioned now).

Making a connection, actually. I'm in Chonburi, Thailand now (for SRS).

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This new registrar guy, he can stay.

That is awesome TGB.

[natashatasha]

I know you won't need it, but best of luck anyway Aeriele ^.^ May the results be everything you hope for and more.

[Belial]

Monika, superglucose, Kilroy[ZTC], Vaniver - when Belial said "cut it out", he meant it. Seriously. This is a safespace thread, it is not the right place for an argument. Take it to PMs if you wish.

Ahem. If I have to raise my voice again, I swear by Nebt-Het that I'll turn this forum right around and go home.

[Bassoon]

Good luck Aaeriele! I hope all goes well for you!

[poxic]

Seconded. May this change be what you hope it to be.

::hugs::

[Shivahn]

*hugs*

Yay Aaeriele!

[semicharmed]

Seconded. May this change be what you hope it to be.

::hugs::

I would like to third this, and also add that (assuming you are able to and enjoy it) I hope you eat lots of yummy Thai food.
Safe travels and speedy recovery.

[Deva]

Hopes your business will be positive and non-imaginary, Aaeriele. For seriousSRS.

[Vaniver]

I'm moving out of this house tomorrow! I'm nearly free!

Congrats!

[Amarantha]

for SRS

Good luck

[FreyasSpirit]

Aaeriele ^_______^

I hope it's everything you've dreamed of.

[PM 2Ring]

Yay for Aaeriele! I trust that it will all go smoothly and you recover swiftly.

* big hugs *

[Sarr]

Hooray! Hope it goes wonderfully!

[HugsBoson]

Good luck Miss Aaeri! ^_^

[Aaeriele]

Hospital check-in is in another 6 hours (noon, local time), and then the op is tomorrow at 8:45 AM (time zones). The op itself is supposed to last about 5-6 hours, but I'll probably be fairly zonked afterwards; I'll have DBC post a status update though.

[Bassoon]

I moved into my dorm today. It's so cool.

Good luck again, Aaeriele! I know everything's gonna go great for you!

[natashatasha]

I've found when I'm practising my female voice I ave an aweful lisp (I used to go to speach therapy as a child to remove it in the first place). Does anyone have any advice / trickses that I could use, or is this one of those things with which I need to fool around and practise to get right?

[tentacleTherapist]

I had typed out a fairly long post but then I accidentally deleted it all, so basically it's this: I'm finally going to uni in a fortnight but am at a crossroads as to how to present myself. I want to go by the name I use to the friends I'm out to, dress how I like and possibly practice my voice, but this will likely be undermined by bueaucracy which uses $oldname and lists my gender as female, which could out me to the whole class, as well as by contact from people at home whom I am not out/do not want to be out to. But then if I go by $oldname and try to come out later, I will be back in the closet with all the horrible feelings that go with it and possibly cause even more drama. I have this sinking feeling that when I get there, someone will ask my name but I just won't have an answer for them How can I make myself more comfortable in my own skin while keeping in contact with new and old friends without feeling like a fraud? Or is that having my cake and eating it? Grrrraaaahh D:

[Aaeriele]

@tentacleTherapist - consider talking to your professors before the start of class and asking them to use $newname ? Most are usually fairly understanding, and most students never see the paperwork for another student.

[dragon]

Due to some things, it has become obvious that my real life name is causing me discomfort. I feel like I'm outing myself whenever it is revealed to a new person. Sure, I get gendered in real life too, based on my shape, but it is still surprisingly painful when my online interactions are ... coloured by my unchosen name.

So, I'm seriously considering changing my name to Dragon. This seems like an insane idea but I can't get it out of my head.

[poxic]

Would a name that means "dragon" be less jarring than Dragon itself? Unless you want to take on all that being named Dragon will involve, that is.


Some options I found while making with the Goog:

Male-oriented names:
Drake, Draco, Drago, Drakon
Fafnir
Leviathon (shortened to Levi?)
Pendragon
Ryuu (Japanese)
Tatsuo, Tatsuya (Japanese)

Female-oriented names:
Adelind (and variations, including Belinda, Dalinda, Melinda)
Shuman
Tanith


There are many more. This is just a thought, mind. Wearing the name Dragon is awesome enough -- you don't have to soften it if you don't want to.

[Chuff]

Tanith is an awesome name.

Actually, so is Dragon.

[DaBigCheez]

Aaeri's out of surgery and doing fine, albeit still kinda waking up/sleepyish. I'm glad she had me learn the sign language alphabet before checking in to the hospital, so she can ask for at least basic things without having to talk

I'm posting this from her hospital room; I'll be there with her for the next couple days, so I can give more updates until she's able to post herself. (She's confined to bed rest for the next few days, so while I *can* hold the laptop and let her type, it's kinda awkward )

[Kulantan]

Yay

I hope she has a speedy recovery

[dragon]

Thanks poxic and Chuff.

The other names I've considered don't fit as well as Dragon does. I finally worked out a new middle name also, that is a modification of my existing middle name. It sounds right and doesn't feel silly. This can work. Going to give it some time to settle, and for me to talk myself out of it. Ah, but it feels so good to have figured out the entire name at last.

Thanks for the update, DaBigCheez. Best wishes, Aaeriele!

[PM 2Ring]

Thanks for the update, DaBigCheez. It's much appreciated.

* sends loving thoughts to Aaeri & DBC *

[Jessica]

Awesome rebuttal to lesbian separatists.

Also, yay for Aerie! YAY!!!

[Shivahn]

Another thanks for the update, Cheese! Yay Aaeriele! I'm glad to hear you're doing fine.

[Virtual_Aardvark]

Thanks for the update DBC! Glad to hear Aeriele's doing good!

And Dragon is a badass name.

[Feddlefew]

Awesome rebuttal to lesbian separatists.

I am having a hard time wrapping my head around this. Do incidents like those described in the rebuttal happen often?

I haven't met you, Aaeriele, but it's good to here you're surgery went well!

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How should I explain to people the difference between Androgynous and Bisexual / Transsexual / Asexual? I don't care that I'm biologically female or being referred to as a she, but I have a hard time thinking of myself as a "girl" in the traditional sense.

[Chuff]

Yay for Aaeri!

[Shivahn]

How should I explain to people the difference between Androgynous and Bisexual / Transsexual / Asexual? I don't care that I'm biologically female or being referred to as a she, but I have a hard time thinking of myself as a "girl" in the traditional sense.

I'm not quite sure I understand the question. Can you just define each one so that the difference is obvious? I mean, something along the lines of "bisexual people are attracted to people of both (binary) genders," and "androgynous people identify as neither strictly male or female," and so on?

[Sandry]

I'm thinking speedy recovery thoughts for Aaeriele.

Also, totally agreeing that "Dragon" is a badass name.