Think Before Naming Your Child

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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Makri » Fri Jul 29, 2011 2:38 pm UTC

Well, Narcissa does have an -a, so that's no problem. But Artemis just is a girls' name even in contemporary Greece.

There are male names ending in -a in Italian. Those come from ancient Greek names ending in -as and -es.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Eebster the Great » Fri Jul 29, 2011 3:01 pm UTC

Well the -a ending is typically feminine in a lot of languages. I know in Latin, for instance, first declension masculine nouns were extremely rare (though names like Agrippa come to mind). So it shouldn't be surprising that this results in the same pattern in English.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Ley » Sun Aug 07, 2011 9:40 am UTC

My mother went to college with a Candy Barr.

On another note, I met a woman last week who goes by "Deja". I didn't want to ask, but I assume it's short for "Deja Vu" or something...
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby PerchloricAcid » Sat Aug 20, 2011 2:45 pm UTC

In some Slavic-speaking areas, Deja would be short for Dejana, which is not an unusual name at all. Pronounced similar to day-uh and day-uh-nah.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Giant Speck » Sat Sep 10, 2011 4:30 am UTC

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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Grop » Sat Sep 10, 2011 9:03 am UTC

Giant Speck wrote:Shitavious


With a name like this, you would kill the whole world.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Oflick » Sat Sep 10, 2011 11:38 am UTC

My mum taught a kid whose name was "William Anker"...

W. Anker

Perhaps the spelling was actually "Anchor" or something, but for comedy's sake I went with "Anker".
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby nasalhernia » Thu Sep 15, 2011 5:37 pm UTC

This is a huge problem with Chinese names, because the language contains a lot of homonyms. I think parents just never bothered to really say the names out loud... I've heard of and encountered names that (in Chinese) sound like "Pig Language", "Long Middle Finger", "Not Married", and "Piss Ball".
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Felstaff » Fri Sep 16, 2011 8:08 am UTC

Oflick wrote:W. Anker

My dad knows this guy.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby dhokarena56 » Fri Sep 16, 2011 12:59 pm UTC

I'm currently writing a novel whose protagonist is named Saskatchewan Prufrock Zeugma. Then again, he's supposed to have an awesome name, and I'm taking artistic license.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Derek » Sat Sep 17, 2011 5:43 pm UTC

There is a freshman at my school this year with the last name (and school id) of Malehorn. Apparently pronounced exactly as it looks. Sometimes a name change really is the best option.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Monika » Sat Sep 17, 2011 9:39 pm UTC

Seems to be a not particularly rare name http://www.google.de/#q=Malehorn .
I don't see what's funny or strange about it. Why do you think it warrants a name change?
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Iulus Cofield » Sat Sep 17, 2011 11:00 pm UTC

Horn is sometimes a euphemism for penis.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Hope_ » Sat Sep 17, 2011 11:34 pm UTC

I know two people with the surnames Waghorn and Woodcock, they seem to get along just fine. I think people eventually stop noticing it so why bother with the name change?
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Madge » Sat Sep 17, 2011 11:46 pm UTC

While we're adding anecdotally known surnames, I know "Coxhead" and "Smallwood".
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby The Scyphozoa » Sun Sep 18, 2011 1:49 am UTC

Hope_ wrote:I know two people with the surnames Waghorn and Woodcock, they seem to get along just fine.

Hm, do they maybe get along a little too well? :wink:

On this subject: my dad told me he knew someone with the surname Glasscock. His nickname was "crystal balls".
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Sartorius » Sun Sep 18, 2011 2:22 pm UTC

The Scyphozoa wrote:On this subject: my dad told me he knew someone with the surname Glasscock. His nickname was "crystal balls".


Relevant: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFTQTQt6vZ0
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Christo » Sun Sep 18, 2011 8:02 pm UTC

Don't know if someone brought this up or not, but there's an urban legend about a woman naming her kids something like L'Mongello and O'Rangello. Of course, it's just spelled Lemon Jello and Orange Jello.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Monika » Sun Sep 18, 2011 8:40 pm UTC

I think it has not been mentioned more than 5-10 times up to now ;) .
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby GhostWolfe » Mon Sep 19, 2011 7:14 am UTC

If I add the jello names to my drinking game, do you think I'd die of liver toxicity?

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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby DocMesa » Wed Sep 21, 2011 3:55 pm UTC

I know a chap whose name is Tom Boys. He got a colossal amount of shit over it through school & secondary school and people still smirk about it whenever he's asked for his name.

So to all you cool parents who are thinking about giving your child a funny name, or naming him/her after something *YOU* find cool:

DON'T.


....because I promise you your child *will* grow up hating their name and the moron parents that gave it to them.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby flickering_candle » Mon Sep 26, 2011 12:34 pm UTC

A few years ago one of my coworkers had the compound last name of Elcock-Holder. Understandably, on his name tag he shortened it to Elcock.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby d0nk3y_k0n9 » Sat Oct 01, 2011 11:11 pm UTC

Someone I work with has two small children named Helena Handbasket and Iden Ticle. I'm pretty sure that he has yet to tell them what their middle names are.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Sheikh al-Majaneen » Tue Oct 11, 2011 4:19 am UTC

DocMesa wrote:I know a chap whose name is Tom Boys. He got a colossal amount of shit over it through school & secondary school and people still smirk about it whenever he's asked for his name.

Why doesn't he go by Thomas?
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby vjg » Fri Oct 14, 2011 6:24 pm UTC

I named my brother's two children Denise and Denephew. Okay, kidding.

But my youngest daughter's initials are RPG (and that was intentional).
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Kirby » Thu Oct 20, 2011 6:16 pm UTC

The Scyphozoa wrote:
Hope_ wrote:I know two people with the surnames Waghorn and Woodcock, they seem to get along just fine.

Hm, do they maybe get along a little too well? :wink:

On this subject: my dad told me he knew someone with the surname Glasscock. His nickname was "crystal balls".


My old middle school principal has that surname. As a joke some kids gave him a bottle of Windex for his birthday. He was unamused.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby karrde » Fri Oct 28, 2011 6:41 pm UTC

Saw a (fictional) example in which a parent named his fourth child (a daughter) Elena Tera.

Since the family name started with "C", she was ETC.

Thought it funny. I don't know if this has occurred in real-life, though I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it has.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby TheChewanater » Sun Oct 30, 2011 1:25 am UTC

karrde wrote:Saw a (fictional) example in which a parent named his fourth child (a daughter) Elena Tera.

Since the family name started with "C", she was ETC.

Thought it funny. I don't know if this has occurred in real-life, though I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it has.

My friend's initials are SAD.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Aiea » Sun Oct 30, 2011 1:50 am UTC

I'm female, and my initials are MAN... fun. Though it does let me say "I'm the man" and be accurate ;)
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby caisara » Mon Oct 31, 2011 11:33 am UTC

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Last edited by caisara on Fri Dec 16, 2011 2:11 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Whelan » Mon Oct 31, 2011 11:37 am UTC

My mother and her two brothers are all B. Williams.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Ben's Brook » Tue Nov 01, 2011 4:30 pm UTC

Dear prospective parents: Don't name your kid's the nickname of a name. For example, don't name your kid Sam. Name your kid Samuel, and then call him Sam. It doesn't matter how many grandparents have had a nickname as a name, it's improper, and you'd save your child lots of frustration.

"So, is Sam short for Samuel?"
"No. It's my name."
"Oh."

(This question is like asking someone how they got so tall. Funny a few times, annoying the next forty."
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Iulus Cofield » Tue Nov 01, 2011 5:15 pm UTC

Another advantage to that is it gives the child some flexibility in what they can be called. My roommate's parents wanted to name him Dusty, but they thought he might not like it, so they named him Dustin and then called him Dusty. It turned out that he hates Dustin anyway, but he thinks it's nice they gave him the option.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Eebster the Great » Tue Nov 01, 2011 7:44 pm UTC

Iulus Cofield wrote:Another advantage to that is it gives the child some flexibility in what they can be called. My roommate's parents wanted to name him Dusty, but they thought he might not like it, so they named him Dustin and then called him Dusty. It turned out that he hates Dustin anyway, but he thinks it's nice they gave him the option.

If you give your kid a middle name too, that doubles the odds they will like it. My brother's name is Thomas Charles, and he goes by Charlie.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby IronicalVitriol » Tue Nov 01, 2011 9:11 pm UTC

Eebster the Great wrote:If you give your kid a middle name too, that doubles the odds they will like it. My brother's name is Thomas Charles, and he goes by Charlie.


Indeed, my brother never goes by his first name (preferring 'Keith' to his given name, 'Gary'). Although in his case I suspect he just doesn't fancy the idea of being a Jr.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby skullturf » Tue Nov 01, 2011 9:15 pm UTC

Ben's Brook wrote:Dear prospective parents: Don't name your kid's the nickname of a name. For example, don't name your kid Sam. Name your kid Samuel, and then call him Sam. It doesn't matter how many grandparents have had a nickname as a name, it's improper, and you'd save your child lots of frustration.

"So, is Sam short for Samuel?"
"No. It's my name."
"Oh."

(This question is like asking someone how they got so tall. Funny a few times, annoying the next forty."


In a similar vein, don't give your kids an unusual variation on a common name, like "Kevan" or "Jennipher".

In fact -- and some may disagree with me here -- I'd almost go so far as to say you should stay away from names like Stephen/Steven, or Katherine/Catherine/Katharine. Even though those are all widely accepted spellings, when you choose one of those names, you're saddling your child with the duty of constantly having to explain how to spell their name.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Monika » Tue Nov 01, 2011 9:19 pm UTC

Print them business cards when they are 3.
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Eebster the Great » Wed Nov 02, 2011 12:14 am UTC

skullturf wrote:In fact -- and some may disagree with me here -- I'd almost go so far as to say you should stay away from names like Stephen/Steven, or Katherine/Catherine/Katharine. Even though those are all widely accepted spellings, when you choose one of those names, you're saddling your child with the duty of constantly having to explain how to spell their name.

It is however akceptable to replace all hard C's with K's as long as you do so konsistently for all your kids.

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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby Plasmic-Turtle » Wed Nov 02, 2011 12:20 am UTC

Eebster the Great wrote:If you give your kid a middle name too, that doubles the odds they will like it. My brother's name is Thomas Charles, and he goes by Charlie.

I had a friend at uni called Charles Thomas, and he insisted on going by Tom. Unfortunately for him, the fact the Charles was his first name became apparent from the geophysics-computer username he was given, and so we all started callling him Charlie for a while just to watch him writhe in pain at his dislike of the name...
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Re: Think Before Naming Your Child

Postby UniqueScreenname » Sat Nov 26, 2011 12:48 am UTC

I've heard of this, but I don't know if it's true. Think of how this would be pronounced: "Le-a."
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When my sister was little she said she wanted fraternal twins named Nerjerd and Nerjerderita.

I'm not a fan of the name Ima, especially when you have a rather horrid last name. Ima Butts. Ima Horr. Ima Cutter. Ima Kitchen. Ima Mare. No good comes out of it.
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