Who have you hated escorting the most?

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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby omgryebread » Fri Nov 04, 2011 1:25 am UTC

Perfect Dark. The President. The worst.


I actually found Ashley from Resident Evil 4 a rather pleasant escortee. You could hide her in a dumpster, she actually helped out, managed on her own at one point, and in the course of actually escorting her, she tried pretty hard to stay safe.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Xanthir » Fri Nov 04, 2011 7:23 am UTC

omgryebread wrote:Perfect Dark. The President. The worst.

You can't make accusations like that without evidence! I presume you have some?
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Ashblade » Sat Nov 05, 2011 6:41 pm UTC

rigwarl wrote:If anyone played Blast Corps on the N64, escorting the train by clearing the track with the Backlash truck was horror.

Oh god I hated those trains. I don't think I ever finished that game either...
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Amnesiasoft » Sun Nov 06, 2011 4:55 am UTC

The Utilitarian wrote:Frankly I'm little curious to see whether Yorda (the glowing girl from ICO) comes up very often. People seemed to love the game a lot, and I'm curious whether that was in SPITE of escorting Yorda or whether people honestly didn't mind.

This. Entirely this. I do not know what anyone sees in that game. Yorda is completely useless, the developers of that game seem to have no concept of pathfinding... or controls. Maybe it would be better if they did something to try to give you a positive emotional attachment to her? But no, the only emotion they give you is rage. Ico was just an awful, awful game.

Shadow of the Colossus is good. Even if the controls are even worse than Ico (which is quite a feat).
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby iCryBlood » Sun Nov 06, 2011 7:20 pm UTC

Everyone, because they got themselves conviently shot in the stomach before the mission. Except Captain Marshall from RAGE. He was capable.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Izawwlgood » Sun Nov 06, 2011 9:01 pm UTC

Amnesiasoft wrote:
The Utilitarian wrote:Frankly I'm little curious to see whether Yorda (the glowing girl from ICO) comes up very often. People seemed to love the game a lot, and I'm curious whether that was in SPITE of escorting Yorda or whether people honestly didn't mind.

This. Entirely this. I do not know what anyone sees in that game. Yorda is completely useless, the developers of that game seem to have no concept of pathfinding... or controls. Maybe it would be better if they did something to try to give you a positive emotional attachment to her? But no, the only emotion they give you is rage. Ico was just an awful, awful game.

Shadow of the Colossus is good. Even if the controls are even worse than Ico (which is quite a feat).

Der, what? Ico's entire mechanic was around escorting Yorda, if you didn't like escorting her, you didn't like the game. I typically hate escort missions, but found Ico to be fantastic. Your claim about her pathfinding issue is entirely unwarranted; I don't recall a single point in the game dying because of mistakes Yorda made. Furthermore, the 'storytelling' that iconic in Ico and SotC is, again, hit or miss. You fill in large swaths of the tale with your imagination (I had completely forgotten the girls name, for example), lots gets simply left out, and what you're left with either works for you or doesn't. I happened to love the mysterious world, and felt an enormous positive attachment to the characters.

Obviously if the game wasn't for you, it wasn't for you, but I think you're issues are incorrect.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Amnesiasoft » Mon Nov 07, 2011 12:08 am UTC

I never made the claim that she caused me to get a game over from pathfinding, but it's rather stupid to sit there at the top of a ladder, calling her, and seeing her run in circles around the ladder instead of up it.

Then there was that time at the east reflector... I couldn't see any enemies, but the combat music was still playing... So I go off looking for an enemy because I know if I leave Yorda alone that enemy will manage to show his face. A few minutes of searching and I find the enemy... walking straight into a wall.

I also never once commented on the storytelling itself, merely that by making Yorda almost completely useless, that there's no way they're going to manage to give me any sort of positive feelings towards her. TV Tropes tells me she's supposed to help show you what to do and guide you in the puzzles... I was clearly playing a different game than those people.

And on a completely unrelated note, that fight at the end before the boss fight was the worst decision of things to put in a game I've ever seen. At what point is it a good idea to put in a fight against 51 enemies that don't even make an effort to attack you )and even if they could, you can't die anyway) in a game with something that barely qualifies as a combat system?
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby SecondTalon » Mon Nov 07, 2011 12:33 am UTC

"When Archie is too progressive for you, that's how science identifies you as an earlier species" - Luke McKinney, Cracked.com

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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Izawwlgood » Mon Nov 07, 2011 4:15 am UTC

Heh, that was funny. Honestly, I don't recall any of these problems playing the game. Combat felt pretty reasonable, Yorda wasn't that hard to manage, and the puzzles didn't feel like frustrating adventures in 'will she climb the chain'.

Amnesiasoft wrote:I never made the claim that she caused me to get a game over from pathfinding

I extrapolated 'pathfinding issue' to mean 'might have died from pathfinding issues'.
Amnesiasoft wrote:the developers of that game seem to have no concept of pathfinding... or controls

Amnesiasoft wrote:I also never once commented on the storytelling itself

I responded to this part;
Amnesiasoft wrote:Maybe it would be better if they did something to try to give you a positive emotional attachment to her? But no, the only emotion they give you is rage.

Maybe not verbatim responses, but in case you were wondering what I was talking about.
Amnesiasoft wrote:TV Tropes tells me she's supposed to help show you what to do and guide you in the puzzles... I was clearly playing a different game than those people.

I seem to recall her either glowing when near those barricades, or having some kind of 'go that way' functionality, similar to the sword in SotC?
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Amnesiasoft » Mon Nov 07, 2011 6:15 am UTC

Izawwlgood wrote:I seem to recall her either glowing when near those barricades, or having some kind of 'go that way' functionality, similar to the sword in SotC?

The game never mentioned any such thing, and neither do the three pages of instruction manual.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Mat » Mon Nov 07, 2011 9:32 am UTC

I think she shouts things at you if you wander off aimlessly.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby xkcdfan » Wed Nov 09, 2011 11:13 pm UTC

Banon in Final Fantasy III/VI. How can they even try justifying "if he dies it's an instant game over" even if you have other party members around who could use Phoenix Downs on him god i hate him
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Izawwlgood » Thu Nov 10, 2011 12:25 am UTC

Mat wrote:I think she shouts things at you if you wander off aimlessly.

The game is pretty linear; getting lost would pretty much require ignoring the barriers that she opens, and walking... I dunno. You can't really go anywhere else.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Shivahn » Thu Nov 10, 2011 12:30 am UTC

xkcdfan wrote:Banon in Final Fantasy III/VI. How can they even try justifying "if he dies it's an instant game over" even if you have other party members around who could use Phoenix Downs on him god i hate him

Yeah, that was stupid. I didn't mind having him though because if he's in the back row, barring an unlucky shot from Ultros, he basically made your party immortal.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby tms » Wed Oct 03, 2012 5:25 pm UTC

From ADOM:

Companions which are a lot slower than me.

Spoiler:
The carpenter. If I'm slower, otherwise not so bad.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby mosc » Wed Oct 03, 2012 8:08 pm UTC

xkcdfan wrote:Banon in Final Fantasy III/VI. How can they even try justifying "if he dies it's an instant game over" even if you have other party members around who could use Phoenix Downs on him god i hate him
Of course you could just put him in the back row and have him cast his ridiculously OP free all targeting heal every turn and he's all but impossible for the enemy to kill. Ever. So much so that people used to rubber band their controllers in that part to the repeat command button and level to 99...
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Zohar » Wed Oct 03, 2012 8:15 pm UTC

Your mom.


...


No, seriously, this thread is two pages long and no one has made that just? That's just disappointing.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Xanthir » Wed Oct 03, 2012 8:19 pm UTC

I guess the rest of us just have class.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby SecondTalon » Wed Oct 03, 2012 10:19 pm UTC

Unlike your mom.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Melic » Thu Oct 04, 2012 5:04 pm UTC

I forgot about Natalya I need to go play golden eye again. The only escort quat i do in morowind is the one that gives you boots of blinding speed, maybe if i play that again ill just kill her see what happens. My least favorite escorts though are the temple trekking/burgh de rott ramble from Runescape. The point of the mini game is to escort warriors into a swamp and escort villegers out of the swamp. You have the choice of letting the NPCs kill everthing and you just tank for them, or kill everything and they get less xp, they level up and you get rewards for getting all 6 to 99.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby New User » Thu Oct 04, 2012 5:37 pm UTC

For some reason I remember the escort mission on Syphon Filter for PlayStation. Probably because it was annoying, like all escort missions.

In that game, headshots kill instantly. In order to aim for the head, you'd have to go from the default third-person camera to a first-person mode. I think while in the first-person, you couldn't move your character, only aim your gun. Still, it was pretty easy to aim for the head since the cursor starts at the precise x-axis for headshots (everyone is apparently the same height in the game) and if you just move the cursor left/right instead of up/down, you'll only aim at the heads. If you have a gun with a fast enough fire rate, you can clear a whole room quickly by aiming left/right and firing rapidly. The problem with the escort mission, of course, is the the pacifist being escorted would step out in front of you while you are clearing the room in this way.

Just add Syphon Filter to the long list of games that have the NPC just step out in front of you, or walk right into enemy fire with no way to defend himself.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Will » Thu Oct 04, 2012 5:46 pm UTC

People talk about Natalya from Goldeneye, but far, far worse was Elvis from Perfect Dark. A "Roswell grey" alien, he's about four feet tall and has a gigantic head. This means his giant freaking head is RIGHT AT BULLET LEVEL. I can't tell you how many missions I failed because that moron walked his bulbous cranium directly into my line of fire. And with a head that big, you can't NOT hit it.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby wam » Fri Oct 05, 2012 8:27 am UTC

Yeah but at least he had a gun and would shoot people.

I think the president was worse as omgryebread said earlier.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Wed Oct 17, 2012 6:50 pm UTC

So many of these escort headaches seem fixable.

Rafa in Final Fantasy Tactics - You're like a scared little girl, act like one. Run towards the people protecting you, away from the ones trying to kill you, and use the defend action.

Natalia from golden-eye - don't cross in front of Bond within three seconds of him firing.

Wow npcs - don't attack units not fighting already, join the party (so healers can target you easily), and wait for the players if they're more than 40 yards behind you.

Non vulpine members of star fox - Just, wait back at great fox. The effort of saving them is pretty reasonable, it's that we're not usually give a reason (mechanics wise) to save them.

Zohar's mother - A pleasant and easy escort I see no reason to complain about.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Llef » Fri Oct 19, 2012 5:41 pm UTC

This is slightly off topic, but I thought you'd all appreciate it.

I was playing Guild Wars 2 last night, exploring the forest of Caledon, and I come across a villager who needs help. She asks me to escort her back to her town, being an upstanding hero in training I agree. She sets of walking at a pace somewhere in between that of a snail and a rock. . . . . (causing me to think to myself, god not another of these stupid annoying escort quests). Thirty seconds later, she turns and says "I bet this would go much faster if I ran" and she takes off running at the normal player movement speed :)
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Fri Oct 19, 2012 7:00 pm UTC

Speaking on MMOs do PCs count? There comes a point when a good healer needs to learn to just let some people kill themselves.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Menacing Spike » Sat Oct 20, 2012 2:32 pm UTC

xkcdfan wrote:Banon in Final Fantasy III/VI. How can they even try justifying "if he dies it's an instant game over" even if you have other party members around who could use Phoenix Downs on him god i hate him


But... you can tie down your A button and have the game farm itself for you overnight! edit: fuck someone already mentionned that

On topic, I'd have to vote for the Yoshi's Island baby. Really fuck this guy and fuck his cries.


Also you might like this

Anonymous wrote:Timed Underwater Escort Mission with Stealth: The Game

You are one of twenty-four intelligent flounder fish being experimented on in an underwater science facility. During a routine day, faulty computer systems opens every door in the facility, flooding it and killing everyone. You, your flounder friends and your flounder love interest spend a few years swimming around in that experiment room, eating from the big mound of now soggy food that was sitting beside the tanks, afraid to go any further into the lab. Suddenly one night, the player flounder is woken up by crashing and clunking. The government has decided to reopen the facility; starting by closing the main door and slowly draining the water. After hearing this, a shark wanders into the lab room causing flounder friends and the flounder love interest to swim away in all directions, bubbling in fright.

You have 24 hours to save the flounder love interest, find some way to escape the facility and take her to safety before it is drained. To do so you will need to stealthily avoid various sea creatures, lab defenses and government tools. Finding flounders friends and escorting them to the exit is the only way to get 100% completion.

edit2:
WHOA
was looking for the source
and this post is already top result on google in maybe 30 seconds
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby ProZac » Mon Oct 22, 2012 9:42 pm UTC

Llef wrote:This is slightly off topic, but I thought you'd all appreciate it.

I was playing Guild Wars 2 last night, exploring the forest of Caledon, and I come across a villager who needs help. She asks me to escort her back to her town, being an upstanding hero in training I agree. She sets of walking at a pace somewhere in between that of a snail and a rock. . . . . (causing me to think to myself, god not another of these stupid annoying escort quests). Thirty seconds later, she turns and says "I bet this would go much faster if I ran" and she takes off running at the normal player movement speed :)

WoW did this in Cataclysm, with an NPC you had previously escorted at a brutally slow pace during Wrath. IIRC, in Wrath, you could clear much faster than he moved, so your group just ended up waiting for him at the point where he started an event for a while. In Cata, you meet him again and he gives you an end point to the quest extremely far away and starts his slow walking pace. He does this just long enough for you to think "no friggin' way..." before he says "HAHA! Just kidding!" and essentially teleports to the destination and you meet him there.
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Re: Who have you hated escorting the most?

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Tue Oct 23, 2012 1:33 pm UTC

Menacing Spike wrote:... slowly draining the water. After hearing this, a shark wanders into the lab...

This makes it sound like the shark came to the lab because it heard it was about to be drained. Which manages to be more ridiculous than the intelligent flounder hearing about it.
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