xkcd

by **Ser Pounce-a-lot** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 9:44 am UTC

I had two distinct dreams last night and both of them were quite strange indeed. In the first dream, I cursed out my grandfather for some unknown reason. I'm not the type of person to do something like that, and I can't think of a reason to do that, so it left me wondering. After that, I had a dream about Lavos from Chrono Trigger. I think it would be difficult to find a more surreal combination of things to dream about, and was scratching my head about them when I woke up. Maybe it was something I ate?

by **Cathy** » Thu Nov 24, 2011 9:42 am UTC

Recurring dream about going to classes and finals coming up and having some art/econ/geology class in the mornings that I magically haven't gone to all semester and completely forgot existed and FREAKOUT.

Very long dream about getting followed around an unknown country by an assassin and magic and battles and the most vivid part of the dream was always watching for him in the shadows. Kept waking up and going back to sleep and having man stalking once more.

Go away subconscious! Kitten dreams, please.

by **Menacing Spike** » Thu Nov 24, 2011 10:10 am UTC

Ser Pounce-a-lot wrote:...

Obviously your grandfather is Crono and Lavos wants revenge through you.

by **Argency** » Thu Nov 24, 2011 4:07 pm UTC

My friend and I made a sport out of her riding her bicycle and towing me behind on my skateboard. Neville Longbottom told us it was dangerous but we didn't listen until we had a prang with another couple - a guy in a wheelchair being towed by his girlfriend on her bike. We got in a big argument with them and I felt really bad for endangering the lives of others, but also felt like they were just as much in the wrong. I woke up feeling hard-done-by and also a little bit guilty because in the dream I was very emotionally intimate with the girl who was towing me, who in real life is just a really good mate who is dating another of my really good mates. I have no romantic interest in the girl at all, we're just close friends. At no point did it strike me as odd that Neville Longbottom was giving us road safety advice.

by **Brace** » Thu Nov 24, 2011 4:25 pm UTC

I dreamed I wrote some sort of software that would take existing programs and make them run on an architecture they weren't compatible with. It was called SC/MA, which stood for Secure Code over Monster Architecture for some reason, and I think the point was to allow a user to automatically run non-optimized software on clusters and parallel computing systems in general.

by **Menacing Spike** » Thu Nov 24, 2011 5:51 pm UTC

Kilroy(ZTC) wrote:I dreamed I wrote some sort of software that would take existing programs and make them run on an architecture they weren't compatible with. It was called SC/MA, which stood for Secure Code over Monster Architecture for some reason, and I think the point was to allow a user to automatically run non-optimized software on clusters and parallel computing systems in general.

How did it work? Detect loops with independent iterations somehow?

by **Brace** » Thu Nov 24, 2011 6:55 pm UTC

I don't know. I think it was some sort of machine virtualization tool, which tricked code into thinking it was running on native hardware, while also tying all of the actual systems resources together upfront to get the associated benefits, and that this outweighed the overhead. It was a very vague dream. I remember it using some variant of the evolutionary algorithm. The virtualization aspect is what made it "secure" I guess.

by **Idhan** » Thu Nov 24, 2011 6:57 pm UTC

For some reason, I was accompanying Mitt Romney on his campaign tour. We were in Israel for some reason (I don't know why. I guess he was boning up his foreign policy credentials?). Anyway, Mitt had some sort of tiny private jet. It was about car-sized, but it had four engines mounted on its tiny wings. Mitt was flying it himself, to save his campaign funds that would otherwise go to a pilot, but 1) Mitt wasn't a very good pilot, and 2) The tiny, car-sized jet wasn't a very safe plane. We were on the return trip back to the US, but we were having trouble getting enough lift/elevation, so we were having some trouble getting above the level of, say, about 20 feet above the streets of Tel Aviv, sometimes missing power-lines and such (from below or from above) by a foot or two. I was pretty nervous.

by **Cathy** » Fri Nov 25, 2011 12:44 am UTC

Spoiler:

I've been dreaming more than usual. It's kind of freaking me out.

by **astrekmaster** » Tue Nov 29, 2011 6:46 am UTC

I don't think I had a dream (or at least one I can remember), but I did have a cool dream a few weeks ago:
I dreamed that I got onto an airplane, and when I got off, I was in an underwater society where people used lucid dreaming to do many everyday things in their real lives. After I realized the water didn't exist, I could breathe without an air tank. I also remember a part in the dream where I flew over a gap in the floor a few feet wide.

by **Samik** » Tue Nov 29, 2011 4:19 pm UTC

Well, I didn't have any dreams last night worth relating (just the normal incoherent mish-mash, for once).

But I DID wake up at one point to find myself using my old Super Nintendo as a pillow. I know it wasn't a dream because I was so freaking confused that it woke me up enough to be sure (well, that and I didn't put it back completely, and it was still where I left it in the morning). I mean, the cabinet where I store it IS in reach of my bed, so sleep walking was not necessarily a component of this experience, but... what the hell???

Those things are not soft. My head hurt quite a bit from where I had been laying on it, so I'd obviously been doing so for a while (that, plus the fact that after I got off of it, the thing spent the next 5 minutes creaking loudly; I'll have to hook it up to make sure I didn't damage it).

I must have been having a nostalgia dream or something, and just felt like I needed to cuddle with it?? I haven't the foggiest...

by **The Scyphozoa** » Tue Nov 29, 2011 6:07 pm UTC

That's hilarious. Once I woke up to find that I had put a blanket back in the drawer while asleep. But I don't think I've ever grabbed something from off my bed.

by **RollingHead** » Thu Dec 01, 2011 12:34 am UTC

I have gone to sleep in pajamas and woken up naked several times, fortunately not since I started sharing a room.
Tonight I had a very realistic dream in which everything was great, and I was very dissappointed to wake up and realise none of it had really happened. (also I was really late for class)

by **Menacing Spike** » Thu Dec 01, 2011 12:42 am UTC

Samik wrote:I must have been having a nostalgia dream or something, and just felt like I needed to cuddle with it?? I haven't the foggiest...

Oooo, Earthworm Jim. So lithe, so lean, so sinewy. C'mere.

by **albertodegama** » Fri Dec 02, 2011 6:52 am UTC

I had an insane dream! I go to Starbuck's several times a day. They have some new employees and I had to tell one of them how to make my latte...anyway...I dreamed that I was working at Starbuck's...YIKES!!!...and I couldn't figure out how to make a latte...I kept screwing it up and saying..."Let me try that again...

by **I Am Raven** » Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:03 am UTC

I had my driver's license and drove to a Star Wars museum with my best friend.

by **tastelikecoke** » Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:29 am UTC

Hmmm, Star Wars museum? Are there a lot of them in the world or it's not real

For me: I dreamed the sun sets, then the boundary of the night sky and the day sky suddenly turns into something similar to a strophoid then a conchoid, and a lemniscate then morphs wildly like a fractal. I think it's because of our math exam.
After that I woke up and told my friends about my sky dream, but I'm still in the dream when I did that, so I guess the weird sky is on the 2nd level of my dream.

by **Deva** » Sat Dec 03, 2011 10:21 pm UTC

Was going to sing in front of a crowd. Felt no trepidation until standing on the stage. Forgot the words entirely. Already announced the song. Could not change it. Spent a minute attempting to remember the beginning. Nothing. Could not delay longer. Wanted out of there immediately. Specifically wished to rewind time.

Granted that. Rewound to earlier in the dream. Woke up before performing again.

by **The Scyphozoa** » Sun Dec 04, 2011 12:28 am UTC

Do you talk like that in your dreams, Deva?

by **Deva** » Sun Dec 04, 2011 12:47 am UTC

Occasionally. Probably correlates with usage during the daytime.

by **emceng** » Wed Dec 07, 2011 1:57 pm UTC

Lots of bizaare stuff. What do I remember...

At one point was trying to sneak into a castle, and was on the roof. Dug out a whole bunch of sealant that was holding a stone in place. Pulled the stone out to spy on three people in the room below. Somehow managed to knock a bookshelf down and they saw me. Dream reset. Pulled the stone out again, this time was quiet. Snuck into the room after the people left. Don't remember the rest of that part.

Was at my old house where I grew up. Was working on a project with guys from work, something with a circuit. I ended up screaming nonsense words in rage for some reason, then coming up with some lame excuse about somebody screwing something up. Then later we were outside, and I was walking around our yard. I was walking up onto the deck, and heard people playing in the pool. I then overheard someone make a comment about how I was adopted, or a joke along those lines.

There was also a random part where I was looking at my keychain. I thought I should get a new one, as mine is a Lego guy that's missing a leg. Then I dug in my desk and found out that I had 4 identical keychains, all with missing legs. I also had a clone wars stormtroopers one(that was a little off somehow) that was intact.

One real takeaway - I miss our old house. Yes, it's nostalgia, and it's much smaller than my parents' house now. But it was home, and when I visit them it isn't the same.

by **Magnanimous** » Wed Dec 07, 2011 9:36 pm UTC

Mark Sheppard offered me a job, and I accepted because I need the money. It turns out that I'm working in the Spider Room at the zoo, which is basically an open room filled with spiders where people can walk around. My job was to herd the spiders around (we didn't have cages for whatever reason)... Which wasn't too bad since I'm not afraid of most spiders, but there were a few poisonous ones that creeped me out.

by **KrO2** » Thu Dec 08, 2011 5:09 am UTC

Dreamed I overslept for my 11 am final exam. Woke up. Checked clock. 11:21. Woke up again. I hate it when that happens to me.

by **Samik** » Thu Dec 08, 2011 2:22 pm UTC

There was this one morning freshman year of college where I woke up feeling awful, cleaned up and got my things together, heading off for breakfast. It was just above freezing and spitting rain (I hate cold weather, so this was miserable for me - all the more so because I was only about 7% awake). Ate breakfast, slogged on to class. Got a test back, on which I had gotten a very poor score. Shitty morning so far.

Then I woke up.

Cleaned myself up, and got my things together. Took off for breakfast, only to find it was just above freezing and spitting rain. Had breakfast, slogged on to class. Got a test back, on which I had gotten a very poor score.

Of all the mornings to have to go through twice...

by **emceng** » Thu Dec 15, 2011 1:59 pm UTC

First part I remember - I was getting a tour of a girl's workplace. This was supposed to be interesting, but the best room to see was a conference room. We went in there and made out some, despite being in there with another couple. Next, we were in various states of undress. Then another large tour group came in to see the coolest room in the building. I was worried they would see the um...tent...in my pants.

Second dream. I was in a bathroom at work(though nothing like our real bathrooms at work). I was shaving, and managed to lop off half my moustache. I realized how terrible this looked, so just shaved off all my facial hair.

by **Samik** » Mon Dec 19, 2011 3:06 am UTC

Had another oral surgery / torture dream last night. Much less graphic / long / detailed than the last one, but still extremely creepy.

This is my second one of these in the last month. I've had teeth-falling-out dreams for as long as I can remember (sometimes these are more "anxiety" dreams, and other times they are more akin to what I think most would classify as "nightmares"), but these new ones are sufficiently different in feeling that I wouldn't quite categorize them as the same thing. The teeth-falling-out dreams are just about... teeth falling out. These ones are about sadistic oral surgeons slicing the hell out of me while I'm restrained/sedated.

In real life, I'm midway through the process of getting a prosthetic made to replace a front tooth I lost earlier this year, so on the surface, one might think that could be the cause. But I lost the tooth almost 10 months ago, and hadn't had a single dream about it before this past month, so I don't know what would have been the trigger. It's not even a process I have any particular degree of anxiety about - everything has gone smoothly, and I'm in the home stretch. Both times I've gone in for real life surgery have been quick and smooth and painless.

Anyway, on to the dream.

Spoilered for blood and long.

Spoiler:

Unlike last time, this was about a 30 second long dream - no buildup. A lot happened in those 30 seconds though.

I was sitting in the chair, having just been giving gas to knock me out (something I would never allow in real life). The procedure to be performed was the actual next step in the process - having the gum re-opened up over the titanium post they drilled into my jawbone, so that the prosthetic crown can be attached.

As my consciousness is starting to fade, the doctor takes a scalpel and starts to get to work in my mouth. There is a mirror in front of me, so that I can see what he's doing. Only he doesn't start slicing where he's supposed to - upper left front tooth area (#9). Instead, he slices a huge gash all along the bottom right side of my mouth, just under where the teeth meet the gum, from the last molars all the way into the front of my mouth, as if he's planning to remove all of my teeth on that side. He does the same thing to the other side.

This all happens so fast - two quick, deft strokes - and I'm already starting to go under, so that it's taking me a second to wonder why the hell he's doing this, instead of doing what he's supposed to be doing. He looks at me, and smiles broadly and says something. I don't remember exactly what it was, but it creeped me the hell out, enough that it basically confirmed that I've found myself in the hands of a psycho.

As the laughing gas keeps putting me further under (far more slowly than I think it does in reality), I struggle to consider my options. I'm not restrained, so I can try to get up and run. But I'm hemorrhaging blood from my mouth - so much so that even if I were able to get up, fight him off, and run out of the building, I don't even know how far I would get before I lost consciousness from blood loss. And this is all assuming I even make it more than a few steps before the gas finally puts me out. And on top of all of this, he's holding the scalpel in my mouth the whole time, so if I start to struggle, he can certainly do quite a lot more damage before I get free, if he so chooses.

Or I can let myself pass out, so at least I won't have to experience whatever he has planned, and just pray that it's not his intention to kill me.

The obvious answer is to bolt. If a doctor just starts slicing you up willy-nilly, he's probably gone off the deep end and you're not long for this world. But the dream was doing a very good job of simulating a drug-muddled mind. And between the severity of the wounds, and how far gone I already was from the gas, I really probably wouldn't have made it that far.

Plus, I began to wonder if what I thought was happening was really happening. Maybe the doctor was doing exactly what he was supposed to do, but the gas was interfering with my perception of reality. What if everything is going routinely, but I just suddenly jump up and bolt out of the room, bleeding all over myself and violently trying to keep everyone who's trying to help me away from me?

Of course, if I let myself go under, I may never wake up. Or wake up to find myself in a very sorry state.

There as no resolution or defined ending. I didn't wake up - it just ended with uncertainty and moved on to another dream.

by **raike** » Wed Dec 21, 2011 7:41 am UTC

Last night's was rather vivid, and odd to boot. It began with Pandas... I was apparently a member of some group that had the ability to turn into Pandas, and we were climbing snowy mountains. Somehow, I got separated from the rest, except for one attractive female. Then, we took shelter in a cave, and it turned into a sort of battle scene - everybody against everybody, human now, with various arms. I somehow ended up camping out behind a rock and taking cheap-shots at people, with the same female from before. Then, she knocked me out and I woke up.

Then, after I fell asleep again, I had another dream, though I don't remember much from this one other than standing in front of a blackboard and writing something.

by **roband** » Thu Dec 22, 2011 1:00 pm UTC

Had a dream a long time ago (maybe 2 years), where I booked a flight to New York. Forgot about it really, just a dream, right?

Last night, dreamt that the flight was tomorrow and I couldn't find the tickets because I'd booked them so long ago! Weird. Scary.

by **Parle6** » Tue Dec 27, 2011 10:09 am UTC

I had a dream I moved to this new house that was really huge and in the woods. It was weird because I had a different Mom and I had a lot of brothers ad sisters like12 haha. And suddenly a spirit that lived in the house started killing the kids 1 by 1. It was weird because the mom kept making exuses to stay and waste more time in the haunted house. There was only 5 kids left cause the Mom didnt want to abandon her new house. It was really scary

by **Samik** » Tue Dec 27, 2011 6:25 pm UTC

Last night was quite a night for me on the dream front. None of the really ridiculous, outrageous epic-type dreams, but just, hours and hours of little, five minute, highly coherent vignettes...

They are fading, but here are a few I remember:
(spoilered just for organizational purposes)

Spoiler:

by **Cathy** » Tue Dec 27, 2011 6:41 pm UTC

Had first wedding dream. Was terribly frightening, but when told to family turned unintentionally hilarious.

Hoping to have no more wedding dreams.

/channels Deva

by **podbaydoor** » Tue Dec 27, 2011 9:52 pm UTC

It used to be that my main stress dream was the flying dream - where I had the ability to fly but it kept shorting out at the worst moments. Strangely, I haven't had one in a while. I think my new main stress dream is spiders. Just...lots of spiders that are around me somewhere, I have to keep brushing them off, I don't know where they are if I can't see them...*shudder* I've had two spider dreams in the last couple of weeks.

by **Brace** » Thu Dec 29, 2011 3:49 pm UTC

I dreamed up what was basically content to a Fallout game. One area was a town infested with zombies (I guess they would have to be converted to ghouls or whatever), and the townspeople blamed you for bringing them there for some reason. I think it was in Mexico or Texas or some similar, because everything was adobe. It started out as a normal town but then everyone started being killed or turned into zombies, and the de-facto leader at that point wanted your blood for it. There was a church looking building that actually functioned as some sort of private sanctuary for a corporate V.I.P of some sort. It was stocked with crazy supplies and technology and was very posh. What I remember most is that it had an escape pod with a G.E.C.K, and you could choose destinations in a number of different faction territories, but you could also choose to blast into space and dock with some sort of international space station. Apparently there had been a lone astronaut left on the space station when the bombs fell, and although he'd been forgotten about by basically all of society, a few people still remembered him, and had been in contact with him as recently as 20 years ago (I don't know how he survived this long, but this is a universe where extended life is possible so eh). He had also been some sort of benefactor, sharing knowledge and occasionally using the weapon system on board to help people. Also my brain just literally stole content from the Cowboy Bebop episode about the sentient weapons satellite that carved animals and such into the desert and applied it here.

The other area was just a 30 story tall super-tank buried in the desert, which housed a tribe of otherwise primitive clay-mask wearing people. A minor decision in this Fallout game from my dream concerned whether or not you raised the tank out of the sand (being able to bury itself was actually a technical feature for it). If you did, despite this being some sort of superweapon, the result was the eventual destruction of it, as well as the tribe, who lacked the desert survival skills necessary to live outside the confines of the weapon. Conversely, by repairing the databanks and other more peaceful technological aspects of this giant monstrosity, you could help them become more peaceful and grow, with the result being that some would eventually end up wandering the wastes to trade and develop relations with the outside world.

And then some snippet about a woman (I guess they would have to be a member of the Followers of the Apocalypse) trying to preserve a huge hunk of more or less pristine ancient landmarks in order to preserve cultural heritage, but prospectors wanted to strip it for everything useful, and the faction whose territory it was on demanded regular taxes for its ownership which the character wasn't able to pay. She tried to run tours to cover the costs but there wasn't enough interest. So there was some quest where she told you about some other ancient landmark which would be much more of a crowdpleaser but which she couldn't locate, and made you try to go locate it. And of course competing offers from a prospector to do bad things for them.

Point being I played waaaaaaaaay too much New Vegas recently.

by **Vohu Manah** » Fri Dec 30, 2011 6:10 am UTC

I spent my sleep last night stuck in a high-school cooking classroom. It was like a combination of 1984 and Judge Judy. I was trapped in the room with other misfits while the warden/chef interrogated us. Fortunately, we escaped in a station wagon and drove towards freedom.

Fun Fact: Don't read existentialism and cook at the same time.

by **Cathy** » Fri Dec 30, 2011 6:43 am UTC

How do you guys remember your dreams so accurately? I just get vague outlines and just-out-of-reach details.

I was escaping with a gigantic family of people in a bunch of cars from a town of people headed by a man who looked like santa. It was a lot longer, but I can't remember it!

by **Idhan** » Fri Dec 30, 2011 7:31 am UTC

Brace wrote:I think it was in Mexico or Texas or some similar, because everything was adobe.

Or it could have been a GECK-built town from Fallout 1 or 2, like Vault City or Shady Sands, since those all looked like they were Adobe. I'm not sure whether the architecture of GECK-built cities varies by Vault Location, since the ones I'm familiar with have all been in California. (Maybe construction techniques appropriate for California would be different from ones appropriate for Minnesota, so a Minnesotan GECK and Californian GECK have somewhat different building codes.)

Brace wrote:Apparently there had been a lone astronaut left on the space station when the bombs fell, and although he'd been forgotten about by basically all of society, a few people still remembered him, and had been in contact with him as recently as 20 years ago (I don't know how he survived this long, but this is a universe where extended life is possible so eh).

Well, as for as senescence goes, one solution would just be to ghoul him. The could be accomplished with either the space station being nuclear powered and getting a radiation leak, or just having the shielding for solar radiation suck (either have it inadequate all along, or have it degraded). Although solar radiation might be a bit too weak for ghouling. Still being a normal human might be a bit tougher. Then there's the question of food, water, etc, although given Vault-Tec style recycling systems and solar power, I suppose it's possible.

It must have been a happy surprise to find that he's actually a nice guy. You'd think someone stuck up there for 200 years would be a loon, ranging from "We need to get revenge on the freedom-hating Chinese Commies and restore the USA to the great country that God wants it to be" at best to "I HUNGER FOR FLESH" at worst.

by **Samik** » Sat Dec 31, 2011 1:11 am UTC

Cathy wrote:How do you guys remember your dreams so accurately? I just get vague outlines and just-out-of-reach details.

My subconscious and conscious have been in a gigantic arms race my entire life to push the realism of my dreams higher and higher, and make the content more and more engaging.

I have memories from childhood that I have no idea if they actually happened. Some of the most interesting experiences of my life have occurred in dreamworld. I often wonder, what's the endgame? Just how far can my subconscious push things?

If I ever fell into a coma somehow, I probably wouldn't miss very much - I think my brain would keep itself entertained.

by **raike** » Sat Dec 31, 2011 2:00 am UTC

From last night's nap (it was only four hours, so it's a nap):
There was a basket of cute kittens. I don't remember anymore, but that's enough said.

by **farnsworth** » Sat Dec 31, 2011 4:06 am UTC

These last two nights, I had some dreams worth remembering.

Two nights ago, I had a dream that I was in a square black room with a single red door in the northeast corner. The door was not attached to the wall; it was floating in front of it, about 3 inches above the ground and two feet away from the walls. I walked into the space between the door and the north wall and cracked open the door. I could see one of my old classmates from 1st grade, in a similar square black room, waving back at me. I waved back, then closed the door. As soon as I closed the red door, an orange door appeared to the west of it. I opened it, and saw a classmate from 2nd grade and some of his friends. I waved, then closed the door. Another door appeared beside it, yellow this time. You can fill in the rest, with the doors ending up lined in a row, one for each of the seven colors of the rainbow.

Once one row of doors filled up, an identical row of doors formed behind them, with other friends I haven't seen in years ready to wave back when I opened them. The dream ended when I opened the 49th door and saw the one friend from my grade school years who I've kept in contact with--we hugged, then I woke up. She is my best friend, and I had just seen her IRL the day before, for the first time in three years.

Last night's dream was more of an image than a sequence of events. A current classmate of mine was standing in the middle of a space (no particular location, just a visual space). From the chest down, her body was covered in feathers, Mardi Gras beads, flyers, and confetti of every color imaginable. She looked like a raver gone overboard. The space was filled with solid rivers of color--fully saturated reds, oranges, yellows, and greens, all converging to a point a few feet behind where she stood.. I did not feel that I was a part of the dream at all--that this was something that I was observing. Almost like looking at a painting.

These are the most surreal dreams I've ever had. Plus, I liked the colors in the second one.

by **Gypped** » Sat Dec 31, 2011 5:39 am UTC

It wasn't last night, but a while back that I dreamed I was the general of an army of kittens. They were all highly trained, and I used them to film viral cat videos.

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