1052: “Every Major’s Terrible”

[mitchellisdumb]

As the proud holder of a Philosophy degree, I can confirm that there's not much sense taught in the curriculum.

Since Kripke, it's all about reference.

badum-tish.com

(I think I just created an account to make a joke that nobody will get. 10 points to whoever proves me wrong.)

[Kadzar]

My experience with advisors across multiple majors:

CS advisor: "I'd suggest you take classes that meet your interests. For example, I play D&D so I took classes to help me there.

He should have gotten a BA in communications. Everyone knows Craft (Basketweaving) is OP.

[Me321]

But what about Architecture?

[MonkeyBoy]

I'm surprised no one has yet mentioned my favorite subtle comedic element of this strip: the handwriting in the poetry panel. All lowercase, with random and arbitrary meaningful, artistic line breaks and offsets, just like your favorite real-life exercises in pretension poems.

[Garick]

Sweet! Academic promotion last week. No more "Instructor," but a title that actually has the word "professor" in it. Only Assistant Professor, but I'll take it... and now just as I have to bow down to the social pressure and post a referential/meta comic on my office door, my new favorite XKCD is posted. Move over 806 "Tech Support." You have been supplanted...

[MisterCheif]

It it quite Difficult to say the lyrics in the comic at the tempo of Modern Major General. Because, logically, this is the first thing to try.

It's quite difficult to say the lyrics to Modern Major General at the tempo of Modern Major General.

Want to upvote this...


Also, am I the only one who hadn't heard of the Elements song but has seen Pirates of Penzance?

Nope, I've never heard the elements song, but I just saw Pirates of Penzance on a band trip this year.

And Randall said nothing bad about robotics engineering, my major. Class of 2016 FTW!

[xtifr]

The rhyme only seems to work if you mispronounce "comparable"...

That's depends on which dialect of English you speak. This is actually an example of an interesting bit of English grammar that is rarely taught in schools: There are a lot of (mostly) 2-syllable words that have [...lots of analysis elided...]

Whoo-hoo! Linguistics majors ignored by the comic inna house! Represent!

With the growing interest in machine-human communications, it's even possible that a linguistics degree might be more useful than one in underwater basket weaving--and if all else fails, at least you'll be able to run around the Internet correcting grammar nazis. Like a boss!

[SirChazbot]

I have loved XKCD for years but I think this is my very favorite funny one. There are some touching comics that trump it for overall gooditude. (Take THAT, linguistics majors!)

Philosophy and Business degrees, because what's life without a little schizophrenia?

[AllysaT]

This whole song is from Pirates of Penzance.... and yet no nod to the Theater Art Majors!

(I did Lighting Design, which is not important at all, but I wanted to clarify for my own personal reasons.)

[windowsforvista]

Reminds me of this comic. I guess Randall just hates college now

[bfeist]

Actually, majoring in history does NOT prepare you for a job teaching history. If you want to get a job teaching history (or math, or any other subject), you have to major in education. You only take a couple of classes in the actual subject you're going to teach.

Yes, really. All your teachers in junior high and high school? They had 2-3 college classes in the subject they were teaching you (plus another 3-4 classes in "how to teach [subject]", all but one of which are the same ones the elementary-education majors also take, and one more course in "what the state standards require students in each grade to learn about [subject]", and believe me, if you'd only learned the things the state standards required you would NEVER have gotten into college, unless you count taking two courses per semester at a state university branch campus as "college").

Really?

I have a Master's in Computer Science from George Mason University, and a Bachelor's with a double major in Physics and Math from Cornell University. I got my teaching credentials separately, from Shenandoah University.

And, I'm by no means the only one. Do you really think that someone teaching AP Calculus is likely to have taken only 2-3 college classes in math?

Most people who become high school teachers do so because they love both teaching *and* their subject.

I teach high school math... by choice.

[helo darqness]

Here's a great cover/performance one of my Facebook Friends posted:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7lVAATq8MM

[wiserd911]

This is one of the best geek poems I've read that didn't compile and wasn't by Jonathan Coulton... Speaking of whom, it would be awesome if we could get him to sing this... Randall, any chance?

[Blackie62]

My major, creative writing, wasn't even mentioned. I don't know whether that means Randall couldn't find any way to bash it within the song or he doesn't think it's good enough to even have a place.

Whatever without that major I would have had to actually look up the Modern Major General song instead of just knowing the tune by heart.

[SerMufasa]

"If you can't do what you want to,
then you do the things you can" -- Another National Anthem, from the musical Assassins by Stephen Sondheim.

[Pfhorrest]

As the proud holder of a Philosophy degree, I can confirm that there's not much sense taught in the curriculum.

Since Kripke, it's all about reference.

badum-tish.com

(I think I just created an account to make a joke that nobody will get. 10 points to whoever proves me wrong.)

As the resident obnoxious persistent philosophy advocate, I will claim those ten points, and raise your badum-tish a bedeu-tung

(And I admit that my first impulse upon reading the first panel was to come here and post a defense of the value of philosophy, but thankfully I realized before that impulse could leave my motor cortex that this comic is a roast and no major is safe from the flames).

[VectorZero]

Alt alt-text: "For it is, it is a glorious thing to be, of major, general."

Agreed. Astounded that pun went MIA.

The problem that I face now is that every post is to be read
In time with music buzzing round and round and round inside my head
Even if that was not the author's intent and the lines do not
Fit the meter of the tune and then my brain asplodes a lot

[BigT]

This is awesome. I stumbled over "adherents"--the stress isn't natural--but everything else is perfect, so I'll cut some slack. The original does the same thing on "binomial."

It's not that hard to fix if you don't mind treating science like it's one syllable (which a lot of songs do): "By dubbing econ dismal science, adherents they exaggerate."

However, there's also an error in the second to last panel that you didn't notice. "I'd say" winds up with the accent on I'd instead of say. This also easy to fix, however: "In terms of choices, I'd say that only Sophie's was comparable."

...the spelling is "agoraphobiac", and it doesn't anyway mean fear of the outdoors.

I just assumed it was a joke on the similarity of the root words agri and agora. But, yeah, agora- literally means a crowd or gathering, so agoraphobiacs are afraid of crowds (and a few other things, but that's an extension of the original meaning.)

Also, the accepted term appears to be agoraphobics.

[bfeist]

My major, creative writing, wasn't even mentioned. I don't know whether that means Randall couldn't find any way to bash it within the song or he doesn't think it's good enough to even have a place.

*singing* Creative writing classes kill the joy wordsmithing ought to be.

Feel better? <g>

Bruce (math / physics major)

[OP Tipping]

I'm OP Tipping, and I approve of this cartoon.

[jc]

With the growing interest in machine-human communications, it's even possible that a linguistics degree might be more useful than one in underwater basket weaving--and if all else fails, at least you'll be able to run around the Internet correcting grammar nazis. Like a boss!

Yeah; correcting grammar nazis is one of my favorite exercises in frustration.

[Envelope Generator]

I'm surprised no one has tackled the detail in panel 22.

[bmonk]

This was a fantastic comic. I'm something of a G&S fanatic, and I've seen a LOT of parodies. This is easily one of the best.

I've been singing this all morning. My wife has demanded a performance when I go home.



Randall, I doubt you read the forums, but you consistently outdo yourself.

Which begs the question: what was Randall's major?

[Rotherian]

This was a fantastic comic. I'm something of a G&S fanatic, and I've seen a LOT of parodies. This is easily one of the best.

I've been singing this all morning. My wife has demanded a performance when I go home.



Randall, I doubt you read the forums, but you consistently outdo yourself.

Which begs the question: what was Randall's major?

Physics, iirc.

[ctsketch]

Actually, majoring in history does NOT prepare you for a job teaching history. If you want to get a job teaching history (or math, or any other subject), you have to major in education. You only take a couple of classes in the actual subject you're going to teach.

Yes, really. All your teachers in junior high and high school? They had 2-3 college classes in the subject they were teaching you (plus another 3-4 classes in "how to teach [subject]", all but one of which are the same ones the elementary-education majors also take, and one more course in "what the state standards require students in each grade to learn about [subject]", and believe me, if you'd only learned the things the state standards required you would NEVER have gotten into college, unless you count taking two courses per semester at a state university branch campus as "college").

Really?

I have a Master's in Computer Science from George Mason University, and a Bachelor's with a double major in Physics and Math from Cornell University. I got my teaching credentials separately, from Shenandoah University.

And, I'm by no means the only one. Do you really think that someone teaching AP Calculus is likely to have taken only 2-3 college classes in math?

Most people who become high school teachers do so because they love both teaching *and* their subject.

I teach high school math... by choice.

Same at my University. You need to actually Major int he subject you teach and do the teaching requirements at the same time which is a minimum of 5 years and you come out of it with a Masters

[ctsketch]

Which begs the question: what was Randall's major?

That fallacy 'begs the question', I don't think it means what you think it means...

[Fire Brns]

I'm surprised no one has tackled the detail in panel 22.

The dates?
1935, German Rearmament and Nuremburg Laws go into effect
1969, Woodstock and Moon Landing
1991, Desert Storm and Dissolution of USSR

[Mattyboy]

http://youtu.be/4L_YLRGMAhU

Had to do it...

I think I might have the same mic as davidad - rode nt1-a?

[CosmicLuck]

I have to say that my favorite part of the comic appropriateness of the song "Modern Major General" for the modern way of not picking a major

[Felix Griffin]

I took all of the responses people have come up with (that fit the song) and put them together as a pseudo-reply to the comic:

Spoiler:

While Young Master Munroe is raising hell about biology,
What, pray tell, are his views on syntax, morpho- and phonology?
For every field of study he is wont to leave a spiting gift
…except, of course, the one that deals with those things which he’s writing with.

The study of one’s tongue, and not the one in th’oral cavity
Perhaps that is the field to which he’d deign to lend some gravity?
Thus such extrapolations I can scarcely e’en start to resist:
Yes, every major’s terrible—unless you are a linguïst!

==================================================

Engineering's great for
challenging your cerebral cortex.
But be prepared to spend 4 years
without a chance at college sex.

Electrical's transmissions lines
will make you lose your sanity.
And cringe each time you hear:
"It's not a geek without a double E".

==================================================

I am the very model of a scientist Salarian,
I've studied species Asari, Turian, and Batarian.
I'm quite good at genetics as a subset of biology
because I am an expert and I know that is a tautology.

==================================================

Myself a music major, I just cannot stop from noticing
That music is unrespresented, even though the goal's t' sing:
The comic's words in correspondence to a certain patter song,
But then again, a music major's used to being trodden on.

==================================================

And while I like performance I always do begin to fear
That theater's an industry that dies a little every year
And film initially appears to be a tolerable exercise
Until I realise the only thing I'll do is advertise

==================================================

Poli Sci is good if you're too argumentative
but party guests will find your egomania repetitive.

==================================================

A finance major offers you a chance to join the one percent,
But at such odds that lotto tickets might be more expedient.

==================================================

The prospect of a law degree can put your parents' minds at ease,
but it will ultimately turn you into Mephistopheles.

==================================================

Korbl seems to feel good about a Culinary Arts degree,
With visions of some ancient noble Fre-ench cooking pedigree.
But I think there is something that just occurred to me
while watching Gordan Ramsey explode all over the TV:

Most of us really will not be wearing big white floppy hats,
We will be teaching history majors to ask "would you like fries with that"

==================================================

The problem that I face now is, now, every forum's to be read,
In time with music buzzing round and round and round inside my head!
Even if that was not the author's purpose and the lines do not
Fit into meter of the tune and then my brain explodes a lot.

==================================================

#########################################################
For it is, it is a glorious thing to be, of major, general.

But I have no rhyme for the last line.

(And yes, I joined to post this. Awesome comic.)

[StClair]

And Randall said nothing bad about robotics engineering, my major. Class of 2016 FTW!

Will it be graduating, or rolling off the assembly line?

(I thought about making a 'matriculated vs. manufactured' joke, but decided not to stretch for it.)

[Jorpho]

Just what does one do with a Communications major? I nearly started a thread about that recently.

[Hotmedal]

*Ophidiophobic.
Or not?

[davidad]

http://youtu.be/4L_YLRGMAhU

Had to do it...

I think I might have the same mic as davidad - rode nt1-a?

Right you are sir! And well done.

[Mattyboy]

Just what does one do with a Communications major? I nearly started a thread about that recently.

Mostly it's for those many job listings that say, "Bacehlor's degree required"

I'm working full-time at a theatre right now and taking acting classes, so that's sort of the route I'm taking... a lot of us wind up in marketing, advertising, and other media-related stuff.

I have a hope that it at least conveys on paper that I can speak in complete sentences.

[[username]]

I'd say that Forensic Criminology is the least disliked major in this strip: simply because its criticism is followed by a criticism of those critics.
So go that or Epidemiology. If one of those is going to be terrible, then the other is... less likely to be?

Aside from that, I'm really impressed by how well this works (especially being able to hear it sung as linked to on the page). Randall should go into song-writing, or parodying, or something.

[jsharpminor]

So, I had to do it.

First, I had to fix some of these woefully lacking meters.

Secondly, then, I compiled the results of the fan-submitted (and metrically corrected) lines into two complete verses, blatantly stealing everyone's work in the thread (that is, all of those which match the original strip.)
1) I left out, of course, the slightly-irrelevant video game reference.
2) I don't know what Korbl is, but it seemed like a college, so I went with it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

The prospect of a law degree might put your parents' minds at ease,
But ultimately it will turn you into Mephistopheles.
And Poli Sci is good if you're by nature argumentative,
But party guests will find your egomania repetitive.

And while I like performances, I always do begin to fear
That theatre's an industry that dies a little every year
And film at first appears to be a tol-er-a-ble exercise
Until you learn the only thing you'll ever do is advertise.

A finance major offers you a chance to join the one percent,
But odds are such that lott'ry tickets might be more expedient.
It seems the skills I'll learn here are completely nontransferable,
Just put me down as "undecided," every major's terrible!!!


----

A Music major thirty years ago would almost have been cool;
Performing music in the real world, you need skills not taught in school.
Now, Sports is good for coaching when the other studies are complex
(or maybe it's that some of them go only to have lots of sex.)

While Korbl's students contemplate a Culinary Arts degree
With visions of a gentlemanly ancient Frankish pedigree
The truth is they won't find themselves in a big white and floppy hat,
They'll only teach the hist'ry buffs to ask, "Would you like fries with that?"

Engineering's great for challenging your cerebral cortex.
But be prepared to spend 4 years without a chance at college sex.
So while I wish this "Study Programs" list were just satirical,
Just put me down as "Undecided," every major's terrible!

[Fire Brns]

I took all of the responses people have come up with (that fit the song) and put them together as a pseudo-reply to the comic:

I've studied species Asari, Turian, and Batarian.

You messed up, horribly.
"Asari and" rhymes with "Turian" and "Batarian"
In other words: TAB.

[Scars Unseen]

Actually, majoring in history does NOT prepare you for a job teaching history. If you want to get a job teaching history (or math, or any other subject), you have to major in education. You only take a couple of classes in the actual subject you're going to teach.

Yes, really. All your teachers in junior high and high school? They had 2-3 college classes in the subject they were teaching you (plus another 3-4 classes in "how to teach [subject]", all but one of which are the same ones the elementary-education majors also take, and one more course in "what the state standards require students in each grade to learn about [subject]", and believe me, if you'd only learned the things the state standards required you would NEVER have gotten into college, unless you count taking two courses per semester at a state university branch campus as "college").

Really?

I have a Master's in Computer Science from George Mason University, and a Bachelor's with a double major in Physics and Math from Cornell University. I got my teaching credentials separately, from Shenandoah University.

And, I'm by no means the only one. Do you really think that someone teaching AP Calculus is likely to have taken only 2-3 college classes in math?

Most people who become high school teachers do so because they love both teaching *and* their subject.

I teach high school math... by choice.

Yeah, I had two different math teachers that were actual mathematicians. One of them was supposed to work with the Superconducting Super Collider in Texas before that got shut down. The other didn't issue homework other than an essay(I did mine on Pythagoras), and favored in class discussion(it helped that there were only 6 of us in the Honors class). I know some teachers are more or less college dropouts with a degree, but it's hardly a safe assumption. Amusingly enough, I also had a teacher that majored in history. He taught Spanish.

Oh, and I found a major that isn't terrible! It seems quite delicious, in fact.

[J Thomas]

Oh, and I found a major that isn't terrible! It seems quite delicious, in fact.

"I wanted to do cutting-edge research. I got a grant to study how to sharpen knives."