1250: "Old Accounts"

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dalcde
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1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby dalcde » Mon Aug 12, 2013 6:57 am UTC

Image
Title text: "If you close an account while it's still friends with people, it contributes to database linkage accumulation slowdown, which is a major looming problem for web infrastructure and definitely not a thing I just made up."

I don't care

SomeoneSomewhere
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby SomeoneSomewhere » Mon Aug 12, 2013 6:59 am UTC

I have a sudden urge to create a bunch of random facebook accounts and ignore them...

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Djehutynakht » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:04 am UTC

I try to keep up, although there's a few accounts that have gone derelict.

And there's some I'll ignore for months and then come back later.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby kasmeneo » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:08 am UTC

GOOMHR.... when I checked my mail this morning and found various social network newsletters I thought "I should definitely clean up my memberships and leave the networks I'm not using anymore..."

And "database linkage accumulation slowdown"...? He *made* that up, right?
It's cooler up here.

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Quicksilver
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Quicksilver » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:10 am UTC

I go further than that, and delete all my old posts one by one before deleting an account. I never add friends, so that's a non issue for me.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby tho74 » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:10 am UTC

So... We should all create as many facebook/Google+ accounts as possible and link them as much as possible to each and everyone to mud the water for the NSA?

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby StClair » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:48 am UTC

Not really funny to me, as I have at least one recent case (and one close call) of friends' accounts going inactive because the owner has died.

and so I feel the Reaper's cold hand on my (digital) neck, whispering in my ear: "This what you have to look forward to, in the decades ahead: more and more dead friends. Some leaving behind a chronicle of their slow decline, and others that just... stop."

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby rhomboidal » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:52 am UTC

I'd try it, but it'd feel too much like social serial-killing.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Red Hal » Mon Aug 12, 2013 8:01 am UTC

StClair wrote:Not really funny to me, as I have at least one recent case (and one close call) of friends' accounts going inactive because the owner has died.

and so I feel the Reaper's cold hand on my (digital) neck, whispering in my ear: "This what you have to look forward to, in the decades ahead: more and more dead friends. Some leaving behind a chronicle of their slow decline, and others that just... stop."


+1
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Wooloomooloo » Mon Aug 12, 2013 8:04 am UTC

Quicksilver wrote:I go further than that, and delete all my old posts one by one before deleting an account. I never add friends, so that's a non issue for me.

NOOOOOO! The missing posts will just create more database lattice fragmentation (also totally not a thing I just made up) !

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da Doctah
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby da Doctah » Mon Aug 12, 2013 8:17 am UTC

kasmeneo wrote:And "database linkage accumulation slowdown"...? He *made* that up, right?
Can't be. We know Randall well enough to know he'd never create a buzzphrase with such a miserable unpronounceable acronym. QED: it's something from the real world.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Wooloomooloo » Mon Aug 12, 2013 8:29 am UTC

Djehutynakht wrote:I try to keep up, although there's a few accounts that have gone derelict.

And there's some I'll ignore for months and then come back later.

I squarely blame the site owners for that. What else can I do but leave countless quasi-zombie accounts behind me when every. single. bloody. site. insists that I make an account even to see pictures or links, let alone ask a single question or post a reply to an unanswered one if I happened to figure out the answer myself, and woe betide me if I'd just like to comment on something somewhere without being a card-carrying member.

Regarding non-casual accounts that one returns to somewhat regularly - I have no such things, which is to say they are simply too many to return to with any semblance of regularity: I'm interested in adventure games, electronics, MCU programming, hobby CNCs and PCB milling, smartphone fiddling, mapping, coding on github, I have a bike and a car, and therefore I'm a returning "member" on any number of major sites related to those - 24 hours a day would not be enough to just keep up with what's going on everywhere, let alone keep up any sort of presence, so all my accounts look dead most of the time.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby The Moomin » Mon Aug 12, 2013 8:39 am UTC

But if you remove the comments, it de-nests the replies leaving them homeless.

Migratory replies seeking new nests are the number 1 cause of de-railing topics in comment threads leading to the excessive amounts of aggressiveness caused by general bafflement and misunderstanding.

We should put forward a proposal for conversation conservation areas.
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Quicksilver » Mon Aug 12, 2013 8:47 am UTC

Wooloomooloo wrote:
Quicksilver wrote:I go further than that, and delete all my old posts one by one before deleting an account. I never add friends, so that's a non issue for me.

NOOOOOO! The missing posts will just create more database lattice fragmentation (also totally not a thing I just made up) !
I've never been convinced any forum worth a damn deletes anything. They either flag a post status as deleted or throw it into an archive. If your SQL filters the posts by a different status, it just gives off the illusion the post is gone. Still, if it's not seen on the internet, it's good enough for me.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby JeromeWest » Mon Aug 12, 2013 8:48 am UTC

The Moomin wrote:But if you remove the comments, it de-nests the replies leaving them homeless.

Migratory replies seeking new nests are the number 1 cause of de-railing topics in comment threads leading to the excessive amounts of aggressiveness caused by general bafflement and misunderstanding.

We should put forward a proposal for conversation conservation areas.


But then she asked about the cheesecakes, and to cut a long story short, I had no choice but to marry her sister!

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby tibfulv » Mon Aug 12, 2013 9:26 am UTC

kasmeneo wrote:... "database linkage accumulation slowdown"...? He *made* that up, right?

Googling that phrase leaves as the top result this thread, and the rest are links to the comic, so I'm going to go with yes.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby JTL » Mon Aug 12, 2013 9:51 am UTC

da Doctah wrote:
kasmeneo wrote:And "database linkage accumulation slowdown"...? He *made* that up, right?
Can't be. We know Randall well enough to know he'd never create a buzzphrase with such a miserable unpronounceable acronym. QED: it's something from the real world.


"database linkage accumulation slowdown" = DaLAS?

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby J L » Mon Aug 12, 2013 9:54 am UTC

Account hygiene is important. Using TweetDelete gives me a sense of cleanliness most detergents only promise, but never provide.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Rzah » Mon Aug 12, 2013 11:29 am UTC

Quicksilver wrote:I've never been convinced any forum worth a damn deletes anything. They either flag a post status as deleted or throw it into an archive. If your SQL filters the posts by a different status, it just gives off the illusion the post is gone. Still, if it's not seen on the internet, it's good enough for me.


Well you can undo archiving, takes a confident/foolhardy man to code for deletion.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby orthogon » Mon Aug 12, 2013 12:02 pm UTC

That reminds me: it's about time I defragged my social life.
xtifr wrote:... and orthogon merely sounds undecided.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Diadem » Mon Aug 12, 2013 12:18 pm UTC

Deleting them in reverse order of creation?

Shouldn't the standard destructor already take care of that? You only really need to manually do that if you have html links on your account. Or if you have children, of course.

(So sorry, I did way too much c++ lately)
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby blowfishhootie » Mon Aug 12, 2013 1:07 pm UTC

FakeBlock should probably be able to take care of this problem.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby cellocgw » Mon Aug 12, 2013 1:32 pm UTC

Sort of what Gibson wrote about in Idoru. All that wasted interactive space turned out to be a useful virtual hangout.
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby rmsgrey » Mon Aug 12, 2013 1:38 pm UTC

JTL wrote:
da Doctah wrote:
kasmeneo wrote:And "database linkage accumulation slowdown"...? He *made* that up, right?
Can't be. We know Randall well enough to know he'd never create a buzzphrase with such a miserable unpronounceable acronym. QED: it's something from the real world.


"database linkage accumulation slowdown" = DaLAS?


D-LAS works for me.

But I agree that all these throwaway logins people have are a waste of time and effort - what we really need is a universal standard guest login protocol that allows you to sign into any site as a non-member and leave comments. Yes, a new login standard is the answer! http://www.xkcd.com/927/

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby TimeLurker » Mon Aug 12, 2013 1:50 pm UTC

I'd be careful which online community you leave. I’ve heard of places where, if they suspect you might be leaving, they tie you up in their basement and force you too stay. :wink:
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Slidewrx » Mon Aug 12, 2013 2:11 pm UTC

"database linkage accumulation slowdown" = DaLAS?


I made an account to clarify the pronunciation of this acronym. It is DaLAcS, pronounced 'Daleks'. Have a nice day. The computer is your friend.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby OtherRob » Mon Aug 12, 2013 2:31 pm UTC

Wooloomooloo wrote:
Djehutynakht wrote:I try to keep up, although there's a few accounts that have gone derelict.

And there's some I'll ignore for months and then come back later.

I squarely blame the site owners for that. What else can I do but leave countless quasi-zombie accounts behind me when every. single. bloody. site. insists that I make an account even to see pictures or links, let alone ask a single question or post a reply to an unanswered one if I happened to figure out the answer myself, and woe betide me if I'd just like to comment on something somewhere without being a card-carrying member.


This. I can understand having to post a reply/comment/question on a site, but to just read someone's update? Very annoying...

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Steve the Pocket » Mon Aug 12, 2013 4:52 pm UTC

rmsgrey wrote:I agree that all these throwaway logins people have are a waste of time and effort - what we really need is a universal standard guest login protocol that allows you to sign into any site as a non-member and leave comments. Yes, a new login standard is the answer! http://www.xkcd.com/927/

OpenID is kind of this already, but very few sites bother to use it. There's also that "Log in thru Facebook" thing that a lot of sites are doing now, but then you'd have to use your real name everywhere, and it allows Facebook to spy on all your Internet activity. (Then again, I'm convinced it's able to magically do this anyway. I once got a message suggesting I friend a guy that I only knew through a backwater imageboard that nobody's ever heard of and which certainly does not have any Facebook widgets in it.)
cephalopod9 wrote:Only on Xkcd can you start a topic involving Hitler and people spend the better part of half a dozen pages arguing about the quality of Operating Systems.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby eran_rathan » Mon Aug 12, 2013 4:56 pm UTC

StClair wrote:Not really funny to me, as I have at least one recent case (and one close call) of friends' accounts going inactive because the owner has died.

and so I feel the Reaper's cold hand on my (digital) neck, whispering in my ear: "This what you have to look forward to, in the decades ahead: more and more dead friends. Some leaving behind a chronicle of their slow decline, and others that just... stop."



:( I too have had this happen in the past week.
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Kit. » Mon Aug 12, 2013 5:48 pm UTC

eran_rathan wrote:
StClair wrote:Not really funny to me, as I have at least one recent case (and one close call) of friends' accounts going inactive because the owner has died.

and so I feel the Reaper's cold hand on my (digital) neck, whispering in my ear: "This what you have to look forward to, in the decades ahead: more and more dead friends. Some leaving behind a chronicle of their slow decline, and others that just... stop."

:( I too have had this happen in the past week.

One day it's going to happen with my accounts too.

YMMV, though :roll:

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Valarya » Mon Aug 12, 2013 6:17 pm UTC

TimeLurker wrote:I'd be careful which online community you leave. I’ve heard of places where, if they suspect you might be leaving, they tie you up in their basement and force you to stay. :wink:

And pelt you with M&Ms.
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Farabor » Mon Aug 12, 2013 6:24 pm UTC

Post by TimeLurker
I'd be careful which online community you leave. I’ve heard of places where, if they suspect you might be leaving, they tie you up in their basement and force you too stay. :wink:


There are places you have to pay extra for that service!

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby PinkShinyRose » Mon Aug 12, 2013 6:37 pm UTC

OtherRob wrote:
Wooloomooloo wrote:
Djehutynakht wrote:I try to keep up, although there's a few accounts that have gone derelict.

And there's some I'll ignore for months and then come back later.

I squarely blame the site owners for that. What else can I do but leave countless quasi-zombie accounts behind me when every. single. bloody. site. insists that I make an account even to see pictures or links, let alone ask a single question or post a reply to an unanswered one if I happened to figure out the answer myself, and woe betide me if I'd just like to comment on something somewhere without being a card-carrying member.


This. I can understand having to post a reply/comment/question on a site, but to just read someone's update? Very annoying...


For a new topic I would agree, but plenty of blogs just have a name field over the comment field and that seems to work fine. On a forum it's different, as some continued discussion is expected, but for Q&A sites or blogs it seems silly for answers/comments. Even wikipedia doesn't need you to log in to edit the wiki (although it is recommended in order to hide your IP-address). There is also the option of a hybrid system with optional registration of a nickname, although I haven't seen it on the web yet, it seems to work fine on IRC, wikipedia also offers optional registration but requires you to use your IP-address instead of a nickname when unregistered and I consider this identification procedure an acceptable measure to counter destructive behaviour on a wiki.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Pfhorrest » Mon Aug 12, 2013 6:43 pm UTC

Steve the Pocket wrote:...allows Facebook to spy on all your Internet activity. (Then again, I'm convinced it's able to magically do this anyway. I once got a message suggesting I friend a guy that I only knew through a backwater imageboard that nobody's ever heard of and which certainly does not have any Facebook widgets in it.)

I've got that one beat: I am not and never have been on Facebook, but still get "you should join because you know these people on it!" emails now and then, and one time I got one suggesting I join because a guy I know on the other side of the world (California to Iceland), who I only know through an obscure ancient private chat server running an obscure ancient proprietary chat protocol (not even something web-based!), was on it. And it referred to both of us by our full real names. Facebook is scary.
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby AntonGarou » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:02 pm UTC

dalcde wrote:Title text: "If you close an account while it's still friends with people, it contributes to database linkage accumulation slowdown, which is a major looming problem for web infrastructure and definitely not a thing I just made up."


Does Bobby's Mom need to give you a brutal real life lesson in why correctly flushing entries from your database is a good idea?'cause I'm pretty sure I can get a hold of her if that's necessary.
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby banjo2E » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:15 pm UTC

Pfhorrest wrote:
Steve the Pocket wrote:...allows Facebook to spy on all your Internet activity. (Then again, I'm convinced it's able to magically do this anyway. I once got a message suggesting I friend a guy that I only knew through a backwater imageboard that nobody's ever heard of and which certainly does not have any Facebook widgets in it.)

I've got that one beat: I am not and never have been on Facebook, but still get "you should join because you know these people on it!" emails now and then, and one time I got one suggesting I join because a guy I know on the other side of the world (California to Iceland), who I only know through an obscure ancient private chat server running an obscure ancient proprietary chat protocol (not even something web-based!), was on it. And it referred to both of us by our full real names. Facebook is scary.


This is why Disconnect and Ghostery are two of the best add-ons ever.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby orthogon » Mon Aug 12, 2013 7:30 pm UTC

Valarya wrote:
TimeLurker wrote:I'd be careful which online community you leave. I’ve heard of places where, if they suspect you might be leaving, they tie you up in their basement and force you to stay. :wink:

And pelt you with M&Ms.

Is that what y'all are doing now? I fled the OTT while I still could.
xtifr wrote:... and orthogon merely sounds undecided.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby Moose Anus » Mon Aug 12, 2013 9:29 pm UTC

StClair wrote:Not really funny to me, as I have at least one recent case (and one close call) of friends' accounts going inactive because the owner has died.

and so I feel the Reaper's cold hand on my (digital) neck, whispering in my ear: "This what you have to look forward to, in the decades ahead: more and more dead friends. Some leaving behind a chronicle of their slow decline, and others that just... stop."
http://xkcd.com/686/
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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby addams » Mon Aug 12, 2013 10:36 pm UTC

Pfhorrest wrote:
Steve the Pocket wrote:...allows Facebook to spy on all your Internet activity. (Then again, I'm convinced it's able to magically do this anyway. I once got a message suggesting I friend a guy that I only knew through a backwater imageboard that nobody's ever heard of and which certainly does not have any Facebook widgets in it.)

I've got that one beat: I am not and never have been on Facebook, but still get "you should join because you know these people on it!" emails now and then, and one time I got one suggesting I join because a guy I know on the other side of the world (California to Iceland), who I only know through an obscure ancient private chat server running an obscure ancient proprietary chat protocol (not even something web-based!), was on it. And it referred to both of us by our full real names. Facebook is scary.

Amen.
Facebook is frightening.

I was attempting to "get with it'.
I started to use Facebook.

I had no idea what I was doing.
There seemed to be a social convention;

When a conversation broke out that could have easily continued or started up, again;
We exchanged digital information. Facebook, I was told, was essential digital information.

I exchanged information with a woman I had met in the rain.
It was dark we were on a small lane in the middle of Nowhere in a nation far away.

When I opened Facebook she was there.
And; So was a man I had known quite well in 3D.

That is a Frightening Man.
I know what he and his friends have done.
Not all of it. Enough. Enough to frighten me.
I do not scare all that easy.

How the Hell did he and me and she end up on the same page?
I can trace it back. More trouble than it is worth.
No Facebook! Not for me.

That was near the beginning of my Facebook experience.
That was the end of my Facebook experience.

What ever that game is, I don't want to play.
I did not open Facebook, again.

Facebook is nice if you know nice people and they know nice people.
One bad apple? There may be a great many bad apples.

Leave the account to falter and die?
oh. I sometimes think of looking at my old e-mail.

What does your mother think? Do we exist in 2D, not 3D?

StClair wrote:Not really funny to me, as I have at least one recent case (and one close call) of friends' accounts going inactive because the owner has died.

and so I feel the Reaper's cold hand on my (digital) neck, whispering in my ear: "This what you have to look forward to, in the decades ahead: more and more dead friends. Some leaving behind a chronicle of their slow decline, and others that just... stop."

This is a somewhat serious subject for me.
When we lose people. Not under the sofa, but lost none the less. What?
Is it different with the digital age?

Is the loss of a person we have only known on 2D significantly different from losing a person in 3D?
Yes? No? Both? Never, close?

It is a little bit, the same. Right?
But; Not!

To touch the photo of a loved one is not the same as touching their skin.
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
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Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Re: 1250: "Old Accounts"

Postby BlitzGirl » Tue Aug 13, 2013 2:31 am UTC

orthogon wrote:
Valarya wrote:
TimeLurker wrote:I'd be careful which online community you leave. I’ve heard of places where, if they suspect you might be leaving, they tie you up in their basement and force you to stay. :wink:

And pelt you with M&Ms.

Is that what y'all are doing now? I fled the OTT while I still could.

A-ha! A stray OTTer! To the basement with ye!
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