In other news... (humorous news items)

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CorruptUser
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby CorruptUser » Mon Oct 14, 2013 5:49 pm UTC

If it makes you feel better, the Swiss used to sterilize their rape victims until the 1980's. Well, not all of them, only the ones that were abused by the more powerful people in their villages and had the 'nerve' to complain about it. Or just happened to get pregnant as a result and needed to be swept under the rug. (It was a BBC report but I can't search BBC on my phone).

The lesson from of all of this is that when you have justice hidden from the public eye, any injustice imaginable can occur. It not only can happen in the 'civilized' world, it has. Worse, for all we know, it still is.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby emceng » Mon Oct 14, 2013 6:11 pm UTC

http://www.cato.org/blog/court-anxiety- ... disability

So do poorly at work, get stressed about losing your job, so then when you do lose your job, you can sue for wrongful termination due to the stress?
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby KrytenKoro » Mon Oct 14, 2013 6:16 pm UTC

CorruptUser wrote:If it makes you feel better, the Swiss used to sterilize their rape victims until the 1980's. Well, not all of them, only the ones that were abused by the more powerful people in their villages and had the 'nerve' to complain about it. Or just happened to get pregnant as a result and needed to be swept under the rug. (It was a BBC report but I can't search BBC on my phone).

The lesson from of all of this is that when you have justice hidden from the public eye, any injustice imaginable can occur. It not only can happen in the 'civilized' world, it has. Worse, for all we know, it still is.

Not so much "makes me feel better" as "makes me want to go out in a field and shoot myself".

Well, in slightly less horribly-depressing news, vaccincations against cervical cancer are being distributed in Laos.
From the elegant yelling of this compelling dispute comes the ghastly suspicion my opposition's a fruit.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby CorruptUser » Mon Oct 14, 2013 6:43 pm UTC

Fine if it makes you feel better, the fact that we even find out about this sort of thing means that society is improving.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby firechicago » Tue Oct 15, 2013 12:20 am UTC

emceng wrote:http://www.cato.org/blog/court-anxiety-about-getting-fired-can-be-ada-disability

So do poorly at work, get stressed about losing your job, so then when you do lose your job, you can sue for wrongful termination due to the stress?

The court hasn't ruled in her favor, it's just ruled that her case isn't so obviously ridiculous that it can be dismissed without a serious hearing.

And quite frankly, I'm hard-pressed to disagree with them. If you believe that anxiety disorders can be serious mental illnesses (and I do) and you believe that people with mental illnesses are entitled to the same sort of reasonable accomodations that people with other illnesses and disabilities are entitled to (and I do), then it's only natural that a case like this deserves a serious hearing.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Cleverbeans » Tue Oct 15, 2013 6:23 am UTC

emceng wrote:http://www.cato.org/blog/court-anxiety-about-getting-fired-can-be-ada-disability

So do poorly at work, get stressed about losing your job, so then when you do lose your job, you can sue for wrongful termination due to the stress?


Only if you have anxiety and depression, which a very serious disabilities. While the stress of work may trigger an episode it's ignorant to say that the stress of work causes mental illness as claimed in the article.
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Angua » Tue Oct 15, 2013 8:24 am UTC

London letting agents 'refuse black tenants'

They describe some of the practices going on - the BBC investigation found 10 agencies that were willing to deter black tenants if you asked them too.
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Thesh » Tue Oct 15, 2013 8:34 am UTC

/me checks calendar

Just as I suspected, time travelers from the past have infiltrated the future. People, you know what to do. Exterminate fuckwads with extreme prejudice.

Spoiler:
Get it?
Exterminate fuckwads with extreme prejudice.
Exterminate fuckwads with extreme prejudice.

The first means to be very careful to only exterminate fuckwads, where as the second specifies the that the target is fuckwads who posses extreme prejudice.
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Diadem » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:43 am UTC

I thought 'with extreme prejudice' meant 'with high priority' not 'carefully'?
It's one of those irregular verbs, isn't it? I have an independent mind, you are an eccentric, he is round the twist
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Thesh » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:52 am UTC

I was told many, many years ago that it meant to be very precise, as in take out your target only, while avoiding collateral damage. This definition seems to not be that common.
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby phlip » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:53 am UTC

My understanding is it's more like exterminate all the fuckwads, thoroughly, without taking into account any excuses or individual cases... just exterminate them, assuming that they could have no possible excuse. Pre-judge that any fuckwads are worthy of extermination purely by virtue of their fuckwaddery. The "shoot first, ask questions later" approach. It also has connotations of "high priority" and "must be done quickly"... usually because that's part of your excuse for pre-judging everyone.

[edit]
It turns out I'm wrong here. According to Wikipedia, it's apparently a play on termination with prejudice, a term for "you're fired, and we'll never hire you back" (as opposed to, say, being laid off because the company can't afford to pay as many workers, in which case you may be re-hired if business improves). Ultimately all the term means is "kill this dude, euphemistically", and nothing really more than that.

Code: Select all

enum ಠ_ಠ {°□°╰=1, °Д°╰, ಠ益ಠ╰};
void ┻━┻︵​╰(ಠ_ಠ ⚠) {exit((int)⚠);}
[he/him/his]

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby addams » Wed Oct 16, 2013 12:38 am UTC

KrytenKoro wrote:Dammit, I knew Pratchett based the Laundry on something, but learning that they were both Irish and Catholic makes me intensely sad about my heritage.

F***.

If you are Irish and you are Catholic then that is a very small, small -important- but small part of your heritage.
You, both your Catholic side and your Irish side, did so many strange and wonderful things.

You must accept the way all other people must accept, your people from the past were people. Some much better than others.
Your people oppressed and enslaved your own people. It is true. I am sorry.
A moment of Silence for the Woman that lived and died that way.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wod-MudLNPA


Shall we take another moment for the Men?

The Catholic Church has a way to say, "I am sorry. I am sorry we ever did that. And; I resolve to not do that."
The Irish people don't make jokes about everything. I am fairly sure of it. Rule 34 does not apply to the Irish; Does it?

umm. Some people were making fun of the Irish until fairly recently.
Spoiler:
It was said that the Irish made good Slaves.
The Reason?
The Irish were too dumb to die.


I asked about that.
I got some answers, too.

Most of the answers made The Laundry look Par For The Fucking Course!
Human Beings used one another like Kleenex! Worked, not fed nor clothed not cared for in any way from the moment of enslavement until death. Thank the Gods most did not last long.

For some darling girl from Elsewhere to use a Surfer like a Kleenex is morally questionable.
Surfers have feelings.

tasteless joke for context.
Spoiler:
Overheard briefing between two brunettes.
Surfers are like Kleenex.
Use once and throw away.


It is not Human Nature to treat one another so poorly.
It can be learned. Kindness and consideration can be learned, too.
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We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
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Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby SlyReaper » Wed Oct 16, 2013 4:49 pm UTC

Image
What would Baron Harkonnen do?

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Wnderer » Fri Oct 18, 2013 12:21 am UTC

Asteroid to hit the Earth in 2032

http://newsfeed.time.com/2013/10/17/thi ... -20-years/

Spoiler:
A team of Ukrainian astronomers have discovered a massive asteroid, 2013 TV135, that’s on track to hit earth Aug. 26, 2032, Russian news agency Ria Novosti reports. The discovery was confirmed by five other astronomy groups in Italy, the U.K., Spain and Russia’s Siberian republic of Buryatia.

While scientists are unsure if the minor planet will actually hit earth, they estimate the explosion would equate to 2,500 megatons of TNT, or more vividly, “50 times greater the biggest nuclear bomb ever detonated.”


The one way trip to Mars is looking better and better.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby CorruptUser » Fri Oct 18, 2013 12:43 am UTC

So, umm, avoid the beaches...

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby PhoenixEnigma » Fri Oct 18, 2013 1:01 am UTC

Not that it will ever make it into a headline, but the chance of an impact is estimated at 1 in 63 000, which is better than winning the lottery but I'm still not overly concerned by.
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby CorruptUser » Fri Oct 18, 2013 1:31 am UTC

But it's a 1 in 63k chance of EVERYONE winning the lottery.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby LaserGuy » Fri Oct 18, 2013 3:14 am UTC

Well, that means you're more likely to be killed by that asteroid than you are to be killed by a terrorist.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby bluebambue » Fri Oct 18, 2013 3:19 am UTC

LaserGuy wrote:Well, that means you're more likely to be killed by that asteroid than you are to be killed by a terrorist.
+1

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby addams » Fri Oct 18, 2013 3:49 am UTC

CorruptUser wrote:But it's a 1 in 63k chance of EVERYONE winning the lottery.

That is funny.
The numbers are funny.

1 in 63k of everyone winning.
So funny. So true.

That is a long time out.
Between now and then, what do the Russians want to do?

It is a good question. They may have the most realistic views on matters of God throwing shit.
Russia gets hit no matter what. Even if it misses the rest of us, it hits Russia.

Russia has become the new California. Cutting edge kind of place.
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Diadem » Fri Oct 18, 2013 5:28 am UTC

LaserGuy wrote:Well, that means you're more likely to be killed by that asteroid than you are to be killed by a terrorist.

But what if the asteroid was sent by a terrorist?

Anyway, regarding chances, my own personal rule is the delta norm. In the Netherlands we have the so called Delta Works, which is a series of dams, dykes, flood barriers and other related stuff, that was build in the 50s and 60s as a response to the 1953 flooding. The goal was basically to make sure that could never happen again, but it was quickly realized that despite basically unlimited funds this was unfeasible. So they created the delta norm, which says that for major cities, a risk of flooding of 1 in 10,000 per year is acceptable.

Building dykes and dams is something we Dutch are very good at. I don't say this quickly about my country, but this is really something where no one else in the world even comes close to our level of expertise. Despite that, and despite huge funds, the chance of a catastrophic failure of our coastal defenses, leading to tens of thousands of deaths and millions of people losing everything, is 1 in 10,000.

If follows, ipso facto, that any chance smaller than 1 of 10,000 is not worth bothering about.
It's one of those irregular verbs, isn't it? I have an independent mind, you are an eccentric, he is round the twist
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Coyne » Fri Oct 18, 2013 8:08 am UTC

PhoenixEnigma wrote:Not that it will ever make it into a headline, but the chance of an impact is estimated at 1 in 63 000, which is better than winning the lottery but I'm still not overly concerned by.

The figures here indicate a stretch line of variance of 24,400 Earth radii or so, which could include anything from a direct hit to a 98 million mile miss, depending.

Because of the stretch LOV, the impact probability is likely to be revised downward as they get more reliable orbital characteristics for the asteroid. Basically the LOV is a line on which the asteroid and Earth could be at crossing; Earth covers a spot about 7800 miles wide on that 98 million mile line. The won't know any more precisely where the asteroid will cross on that line until they get better orbital characteristics, which involves watching over quite an interval. Basically, even the rotation of the asteroid could cause it to miss due to sunlight accelleration effects.

Have to wait a while and see; maybe a year or two. Yes, 2032 is only 20 years, but still plenty of time to deal with it. Worry about the one they discover 3 days before impact.
In all fairness...

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Wnderer » Fri Oct 18, 2013 4:34 pm UTC

Come on. 1 in 63,000 is code for 'Shit, shit, shit, we're all going to die!' If the asteroid was going to hit us do you think they would tell us? Especially since last time they deflected a killer asteroid, they knocked that piece off that landed in Russia.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Thesh » Fri Oct 18, 2013 6:52 pm UTC

I'm not that worried because I figure we haven't had an asteroids cause a mass extinction in hundreds, if not thousands, of years and, as time goes on, the odds of being hit by a large asteroid decreases as asteroids collide with other planets and asteroids.
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Iulus Cofield » Sat Oct 19, 2013 1:58 am UTC

I don't understand how all you monsters can be so cavalier about this! Assuming UN population estimates are correct, then approximately 134,000 people will be vaporized by this asteroid in 2032. That might not be a whole lot in the grand scheme of things, but your total lack of empathy is nonetheless startling.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Thesh » Sat Oct 19, 2013 2:22 am UTC

Depends on where it hits. If it hits California, that will be horrible. If it hits New York, it will be pretty bad, if it hits another developed westernized country, it will be sad, if it hits a less developed country it will be a little sad, but we will forget after a couple of days. Until I know the proximity from me, I cannot determine my appropriate level of apathy.
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby CorruptUser » Sat Oct 19, 2013 3:30 am UTC

On the plus side, the dust cloud produced by the asteroid (if it hits land) would effectively cancel out all the global warming for like a decade or so.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby addams » Sat Oct 19, 2013 4:57 am UTC

The Asteroid.
What if...The Asteroid?

Like Jesus coming without all the Peace, Love and Brotherhood.

Jesus is coming; Look busy.
The Asteroid is coming; Hedonism the Law of the Planet until the Planet is no more.

Get yours before land fall of the Rock. *It will; *It will; **!Rock Us!**

What could possibly motivate people to not be JackAsses, Assholes and Worse?
Not the idea of a Rock. No one, with the exception of me, loves a Rock.

What if...What if Charlie was talking about The Rock?
He said some stuff. I heard it. Charlie said some stuff.

Charlie was not a funny guy. I did not laugh at him.
What about a World Wide Rumor? It is on it's way.

It has been on its way a long time. It is company! yeah! I love company! Don't you?
If we prepare for company will we be nicer people to one another while we are doing it?

We could prepare for nice company. Make the Cousins take a bath.
Straighten up a bit. Agree to send them to the Netherlands for orientation.
Spoiler:
Do you Remember what that guy said to Sagan?

They are as good as we are; Better.
They are as bad as we are; Worse.


On the other hand. It is, just, a Rock. Of Course, we are as good a target as any other place in space.

Our Oceans and our active geology cover most evidence.
This little orb has been hit before. It will get hit again.

Have You Seen The Moon?? That thing has been hit!

20 years. We have a DeadLine! Good.
Some of us will not make it to the DeadLine.

For Everyone involved that Zen guy was bubbling over with good advice.
He said, "Live as if this were your last day; Live as if you will live one hundred years more."

Some one is always going to go Rogue. Brother Void wrote, "I take a little time each day to die."
After facing ones own death, I would think other things would look pretty good. I would think wrong.

20 years is a long time to wait for a Rock. I am tired of waiting for it, now.
Like all other Americans. I am developing Attention Deficit. NEXT!
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby PM 2Ring » Sat Oct 19, 2013 7:49 am UTC

It's tricky to determine if an asteroid will hit the Earth. You need to determine its future orbits very accurately, and that may get complicated if it makes close passes to the Earth or other planets because such close encounters are likely to deflect the asteroid's trajectory.

The Earth's mean orbital speed around the sun is roughly 29.8 km/s, which means it moves through a distance equal to its own diameter in around 7 minutes. So if a space rock's orbit crosses our orbit at 90°, then there's only a 7 minute collision window. If our orbits cross at a different angle, then the window will be longer.

So to make good asteroid collision predictions, astronomers need to determine the asteroid's trajectory to an accuracy of around 7 minutes (or better). And that's not easy when you're talking about an event that's 20 years in the future, especially when the asteroid's trajectory may be deflected many times during that period.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby SlyReaper » Sat Oct 19, 2013 10:57 am UTC

PM 2Ring wrote:It's tricky to determine if an asteroid will hit the Earth. You need to determine its future orbits very accurately, and that may get complicated if it makes close passes to the Earth or other planets because such close encounters are likely to deflect the asteroid's trajectory.

The Earth's mean orbital speed around the sun is roughly 29.8 km/s, which means it moves through a distance equal to its own diameter in around 7 minutes. So if a space rock's orbit crosses our orbit at 90°, then there's only a 7 minute collision window. If our orbits cross at a different angle, then the window will be longer.

So to make good asteroid collision predictions, astronomers need to determine the asteroid's trajectory to an accuracy of around 7 minutes (or better). And that's not easy when you're talking about an event that's 20 years in the future, especially when the asteroid's trajectory may be deflected many times during that period.


A ~90 degree collision is extremely unrealistic. It would have to be orbiting the sun at ~90 degrees off the ecliptic, or have a very elongated orbit. Most things orbit the sun just a few degrees off the plane, and in orbits with not particularly high eccentricities. It's much more likely to have a fairly low orbit crossing angle, a few tens of degrees maybe.
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby PM 2Ring » Sat Oct 19, 2013 1:19 pm UTC

SlyReaper wrote:
PM 2Ring wrote:It's tricky to determine if an asteroid will hit the Earth. You need to determine its future orbits very accurately, and that may get complicated if it makes close passes to the Earth or other planets because such close encounters are likely to deflect the asteroid's trajectory.

The Earth's mean orbital speed around the sun is roughly 29.8 km/s, which means it moves through a distance equal to its own diameter in around 7 minutes. So if a space rock's orbit crosses our orbit at 90°, then there's only a 7 minute collision window. If our orbits cross at a different angle, then the window will be longer.

So to make good asteroid collision predictions, astronomers need to determine the asteroid's trajectory to an accuracy of around 7 minutes (or better). And that's not easy when you're talking about an event that's 20 years in the future, especially when the asteroid's trajectory may be deflected many times during that period.


A ~90 degree collision is extremely unrealistic. It would have to be orbiting the sun at ~90 degrees off the ecliptic, or have a very elongated orbit. Most things orbit the sun just a few degrees off the plane, and in orbits with not particularly high eccentricities. It's much more likely to have a fairly low orbit crossing angle, a few tens of degrees maybe.


Sorry. I was trying to keep things simple. Maybe I made them too simple...

I agree that a 90°collision is extremely unrealistic. OTOH, even if the crossing angle is 10°, that only lengthens the window to around 41 minutes (dividing the perpendicular window time by the sine of the crossing angle).

Certainly, the eccentricity of the orbits of most of the bodies in the solar system is fairly small. However, some near-Earth asteroids have appreciable eccentricities.

From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Near-Earth_object

Image

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby SlyReaper » Sat Oct 19, 2013 2:21 pm UTC

PM 2Ring wrote:
SlyReaper wrote:
PM 2Ring wrote:It's tricky to determine if an asteroid will hit the Earth. You need to determine its future orbits very accurately, and that may get complicated if it makes close passes to the Earth or other planets because such close encounters are likely to deflect the asteroid's trajectory.

The Earth's mean orbital speed around the sun is roughly 29.8 km/s, which means it moves through a distance equal to its own diameter in around 7 minutes. So if a space rock's orbit crosses our orbit at 90°, then there's only a 7 minute collision window. If our orbits cross at a different angle, then the window will be longer.

So to make good asteroid collision predictions, astronomers need to determine the asteroid's trajectory to an accuracy of around 7 minutes (or better). And that's not easy when you're talking about an event that's 20 years in the future, especially when the asteroid's trajectory may be deflected many times during that period.


A ~90 degree collision is extremely unrealistic. It would have to be orbiting the sun at ~90 degrees off the ecliptic, or have a very elongated orbit. Most things orbit the sun just a few degrees off the plane, and in orbits with not particularly high eccentricities. It's much more likely to have a fairly low orbit crossing angle, a few tens of degrees maybe.


Sorry. I was trying to keep things simple. Maybe I made them too simple...

I agree that a 90°collision is extremely unrealistic. OTOH, even if the crossing angle is 10°, that only lengthens the window to around 41 minutes (dividing the perpendicular window time by the sine of the crossing angle).

Certainly, the eccentricity of the orbits of most of the bodies in the solar system is fairly small. However, some near-Earth asteroids have appreciable eccentricities.

From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Near-Earth_object

Image

Appreciable eccentricities, yes, but not the huge eccentricities required for a crossing angle close to 90 degrees. As a general rule, the higher the eccentricity, the rarer the object with that type of orbit.

Of course, with a solar system absolutely littered with chunks of rock and ice, that still leaves a fairly frightening number of objects that could one day smack us head-on.
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Magnanimous » Sat Oct 19, 2013 2:26 pm UTC

Head on. Apply directly to the forehead planet.

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby addams » Sat Oct 19, 2013 3:58 pm UTC

Magnanimous wrote:Head on. Apply directly to the forehead planet.

Head on. Direct Hit.
Great Idea!

Who deserves it more? What is it?
A rescue team? ShirtTail relatives?

Just one Big Fucking Rock and it is headed straight at us.
We have very little control over our collective spaceship.

We can't 'Tack'. Our spaceship may be long gone before The Rock gets here.
We, the people of the 21st Century, can imagine the Geological Long View.

The Planet vaporizes in the most delightful way.
Imagine water. What happens when Water becomes gas?

It goes very Big, Anti-Social and HyperActive. (like a meth user?)
ech. It is a chemical.

What if....(da -da) What if All of the End of World predictions were correct.
The world ended in Water. Never to end in Water, again.

The next time it will be Fire. (*HA - HA - HA* The evil scientist laughs. "First I wash the LabWhere. (That is not the word lab were , Wear? Labwear.) Then I AutoClave it! 'Fun. Fun. Fun.'

Spoiler:
Chemists don't autoclave much; Do they?
Stupid thing to think about. Still; If a chemist autoclaves before washing, it is still chemistry. (it might blow)

If a chemist washes before autoclaving it could be, just, as bad.
Those guys, Have To, do their own dishes?

Some things are Autoclave FIRST!
Most things are Autoclave, First.
Biology is not chemistry.

Chemistry is the component parts of EveryThing.
Biology is only stuff that makes life, usually.

So much easier than Chemistry. For Organic? Some amino acids. Some Hydrocarbon chains.
The benzine rings are not at all required for life. Benzine rings are a nice touch.

Lipids. Not required; Another nice touch. Life.
Chemists do what? Biologist do what?
Biologist that are anything like me are likely to autoclave shit that really should not be autoclaved.

I like an autoclave. A simple down home pressure cooker is nearly as much fun.

Some had working dials. I am sure of it. (do not need working dials, anymore.)



Our little petri dish is going through The Process?
If someone said, "ok. Let's play, 'End Times!"

What a fun Game. How do you want to play it?
It's A Rock! It is headed Straight at US!

Therefore; Fuck you and Fuck your neighbor.
"!Get Yours and Get It Now!"
The moto of the end times?

ok. "IT"S JESUS! And; He is ALL pissed off."

We have twenty years to do something about ourselves.
What shall we do? Prepare to meet our Maker?

To meet our Makers. Who made us?

What are we? A high school biology experiment?
Well? Do you hope our little experiment went well?

Something grew. The petri dish that is our little spaceship grew some stuff.
Watery place.

God is throwing Shit at us, now?
Why? CalvinBall?

Spreading life all over the beach before autoclaving?
Maybe competitive CalvinBall.

We are like SmallPox. If the rock hits us, before the autoclave:
Then Life is Launched into Space.

We are like SmallPox. If the autoclave works before The Rock gets here;
Then that dish no longer harbors life. The peaces of the dish would hurt if they hit one of the players.

Gods! Hey, Gods! Wear Eye Protection!
This may be a game of Cricket/Tee Ball.

The petri dish is on a narrow stand.
One player is using Rocks. The other player has bet on Time.


We are the petri dish. We are the world.
Twenty years. That is a long time.

If it accelerates, let us know. That would be fun.

Funny News? I think it is funny.
Next! What will the next Big Thing be?

The internet? The internet is still news to me.
Big news, too.
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Coyne
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Coyne » Sat Oct 19, 2013 5:30 pm UTC

Iulus Cofield wrote:I don't understand how all you monsters can be so cavalier about this! Assuming UN population estimates are correct, then approximately 134,000 people will be vaporized by this asteroid in 2032. That might not be a whole lot in the grand scheme of things, but your total lack of empathy is nonetheless startling.

Assuming it hits us. Okay, first I note a change: JPL risk analysis for the asteroid now shows an impact probability of 1:47600. Flip that over and it is 47599 in 47600 that it will miss Earth entirely.

If you look at the table on the JPL small body browser (Java required for the orbital view) there is an entry called "Condition Code", which is 8 in this case. That is a rating of the uncertainty of the orbital specifics for the asteroid, with 8, in this case basically meaning "high uncertainty".

That gets improved by watching the asteroid over time, so we get a better and better estimate of the asteroid's orbital characteristics. That takes time, sometimes years; and as the uncertainty goes down so, usually, does the impact risk. Because if you consider the Earth orbit, we're talking about a possible collision along maybe a few million miles or so of a 584 million mile orbit; the odds are always very poor that another object will collide with Earth.

And this isn't a flat piece of paper: Whether it passes in front, behind us, above us or below us, to our left or our right, it counts as a miss. If you look at the orbit on the JPL small body browser Java app, and use the slider at the right to rotate the orbit up until Earth's is edge on, you'll see that this asteroid's orbit isn't "flat" to Earth's (inclination 6.75 degrees). The latter is important, because it means that even though the asteroid chases us, we have to meet at a pretty small point on the orbit for a collision to occur. That's where the stretch LOV comes in; it's a the best current estimate of where and when the asteroid will cross Earth orbit and is currently 65 million miles long; the asteroid has to be at one 7,918 km long segment of that 65 million mile line to collide with Earth.

So there are lots of uncertainties before we're even sure we will be hit...despite that alarmist news article.

Now let's assume it is going to hit us...at New York City. The estimated 2400 megatons means that New York City is pretty much gone. But while there's a lot of dust that will probably give us temporary relief from global warming (which, by the way, stands likely to kill a few hundred million people--worry about that) there's no radiation, and most of New York state will survive handily. But we have 19 years warning and, as we get close to the time, tracking will be very intense and will get much more accurate. We would know it's going to hit New England weeks or months before, probably; New York City, days or weeks before at least. If I lived in New York state, I'd be in Wyoming by the time it hit...if I had to walk.

That, of course, assumes the mass estimate is right (good chance it isn't, since the diameter is an estimate--even though it is 1300 feet). Then there's all the desert, and the mountains, oceans, the Arctic and Antarctica; places where few people live...and we haven't even talked about the possibility of deflecting it if needed. Or it disintegrating in the atmosphere.

Cavalier? Not really: there's a time to be alarmed, a time to worry about people, maybe even a time to mourn...but not yet. This is merely a time for concern. The astronomers think so, too, which is why they've been watching it continuously since discovery, refining its orbit.

If you want to keep up, keep watching the impact probability on the risk analysis page.
In all fairness...

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Thesh
Made to Fuck Dinosaurs
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Thesh » Sat Oct 19, 2013 8:13 pm UTC

Regardless of species, Mammals take 21 seconds (plus or minus 13 seconds) to pee.

http://www.redorbit.com/news/science/11 ... ls-101913/

Do I detect an Ig Nobel Prize in their future?
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

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yurell
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby yurell » Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:01 pm UTC

Standard deviation of ±13 seconds, though, means that after two we're at negative time, so it basically means 'under 60 seconds' (three standard deviations).
cemper93 wrote:Dude, I just presented an elaborate multiple fraction in Comic Sans. Who are you to question me?


Pronouns: Feminine pronouns please!

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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby Plasma Man » Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:16 pm UTC

"Sir! The odds of us successfully navigating past this asteroid are forty-seven-thousand, six hundred in favour!"
"Never tell me the odds! ... Oh, actually, that's pretty good."
Please note that despite the lovely avatar Sungura gave me, I am not a medical doctor.

Possibly my proudest moment on the fora.

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addams
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Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby addams » Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:24 pm UTC

Coyne wrote:
Iulus Cofield wrote:I don't understand how all you monsters can be so cavalier about this! Assuming UN population estimates are correct, then approximately 134,000 people will be vaporized by this asteroid in 2032. That might not be a whole lot in the grand scheme of things, but your total lack of empathy is nonetheless startling.

Assuming it hits us. Okay, first I note a change: JPL risk analysis for the asteroid now shows an impact probability of 1:47600. Flip that over and it is 47599 in 47600 that it will miss Earth entirely.

If you look at the table on the JPL small body browser (Java required for the orbital view) there is an entry called "Condition Code", which is 8 in this case. That is a rating of the uncertainty of the orbital specifics for the asteroid, with 8, in this case basically meaning "high uncertainty".

That gets improved by watching the asteroid over time, so we get a better and better estimate of the asteroid's orbital characteristics. That takes time, sometimes years; and as the uncertainty goes down so, usually, does the impact risk. Because if you consider the Earth orbit, we're talking about a possible collision along maybe a few million miles or so of a 584 million mile orbit; the odds are always very poor that another object will collide with Earth.

And this isn't a flat piece of paper: Whether it passes in front, behind us, above us or below us, to our left or our right, it counts as a miss. If you look at the orbit on the JPL small body browser Java app, and use the slider at the right to rotate the orbit up until Earth's is edge on, you'll see that this asteroid's orbit isn't "flat" to Earth's (inclination 6.75 degrees). The latter is important, because it means that even though the asteroid chases us, we have to meet at a pretty small point on the orbit for a collision to occur. That's where the stretch LOV comes in; it's a the best current estimate of where and when the asteroid will cross Earth orbit and is currently 65 million miles long; the asteroid has to be at one 7,918 km long segment of that 65 million mile line to collide with Earth.

So there are lots of uncertainties before we're even sure we will be hit...despite that alarmist news article.

Now let's assume it is going to hit us...at New York City. The estimated 2400 megatons means that New York City is pretty much gone. But while there's a lot of dust that will probably give us temporary relief from global warming (which, by the way, stands likely to kill a few hundred million people--worry about that) there's no radiation, and most of New York state will survive handily. But we have 19 years warning and, as we get close to the time, tracking will be very intense and will get much more accurate. We would know it's going to hit New England weeks or months before, probably; New York City, days or weeks before at least. If I lived in New York state, I'd be in Wyoming by the time it hit...if I had to walk.

That, of course, assumes the mass estimate is right (good chance it isn't, since the diameter is an estimate--even though it is 1300 feet). Then there's all the desert, and the mountains, oceans, the Arctic and Antarctica; places where few people live...and we haven't even talked about the possibility of deflecting it if needed. Or it disintegrating in the atmosphere.

Cavalier? Not really: there's a time to be alarmed, a time to worry about people, maybe even a time to mourn...but not yet. This is merely a time for concern. The astronomers think so, too, which is why they've been watching it continuously since discovery, refining its orbit.

If you want to keep up, keep watching the impact probability on the risk analysis page.

That was so good.
Level headed and factually correct or nearly so.

Where is the funny in That?
Really? Only 2400 megatons? ok.

Are you certain we don't need a good Planet Wide Panic Attack?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwlNPhn64TA
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

elasto
Posts: 3757
Joined: Mon May 10, 2010 1:53 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items, etc)

Postby elasto » Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:36 am UTC

Coyne wrote:Now let's assume it is going to hit us...at New York City. The estimated 2400 megatons means that New York City is pretty much gone. But while there's a lot of dust that will probably give us temporary relief from global warming (which, by the way, stands likely to kill a few hundred million people--worry about that) there's no radiation, and most of New York state will survive handily. But we have 19 years warning and, as we get close to the time, tracking will be very intense and will get much more accurate. We would know it's going to hit New England weeks or months before, probably; New York City, days or weeks before at least. If I lived in New York state, I'd be in Wyoming by the time it hit...if I had to walk.

Hitting land is probably the best case scenario. Hitting ocean is more likely and also more damaging. But, yeah, good post ^^


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