Interesting Roleplaying and LARP Stories

Of the Tabletop, and other, lesser varieties.

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prophetuscaecus
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby prophetuscaecus » Wed Jul 16, 2008 10:04 pm UTC

Story One
I haven't played DnD very long, but I've got around 8 characters made (2 of which the DM allows me to play together, as per their background, and none of my characters are above level 3). Anyway, myself, my younger brother and his friend, and my older brother just created fresh characters; My older Brother (DMing and playing a PC) was a female half-elf ranger LG, my younger brother was a half-orc barbarian CG (named Sisyphus the Illiterate, later changed to Sisyphus the Read-gooder when he got ranks in literacy), My brother's friend was a halfling rogue LE, and I was a dwarven fighter CE... quite the diverse group, though we didn't have a caster or healer (nobody ever wants to play cleric for some reason).

Anyway, my brother was DM, and he is very cliche; we were supposed to meet in a bar and be recruited to save some people, as usual. But, here's how it goes down...

My Character, Seamus the Hellborn is sitting in the pub, drinking heavily as usual, listening in on two soldiers talking about a recent battle. Aside from my character and the two soldiers, there is a bartender and a barmaid, and the stereotypical old-man-powerful-wizard-sitting-alone-in-a-corner. I had full intentions of listening in on the soldiers and killing them later, but...

DM: "what do you do?"
Rogue: "I'm gonna catch the bar door on fire!"
*rolls a 20, and the door burns down, the whole bar going up in flames*
Rogue rolls to see if he can make everyone else think that he isn't responsible; myself, the caster, one of the soldiers and the bartender see him do it, everyone rolls for initiative.
I, drunk and pissed, knock out the rogue with one swing of my axe... immediately afterwards, our half-orc barbarian tumbles into him and pushes him out of the way in his attempt to piss out the fire (not a very high intelligence score). The confused, drunken soldier fires his crossbow at the barbarian he thinks lit the place on fire... fumbles the roll and shoots me in the back for 2 damage. I get pissed and lob the soldier's head of with my dwarven war axe (and 3 natural 20s). I turn around and bury my axe in the barbarian's shoulder, doing 3 damage. Barbarian, now thoroughly pissed that he just took an axe to the shoulder, counterattacks...
Natural 20!
rolls again... another natural 20!
he hits me doing 1d12 x3 for a total of 27 damage... killing me instantly as the DM's PC bursts through a solid wall.
DM decides that he doesn't want to take the time to reroll a character, so he instead opted to have the caster magically knock us all unconscious... and then I wake up in a bed, naked and pissed off! I burst out of my room with my war axe and no clothing whatsoever, and charge downstairs where I attempt to kill the caster, but fail while countering a diplomacy check, ultimately being forced to go on an adventure to save some zombified little girl...

Story Two
In another instance, I was playing with a bad DM who wouldn't let our characters get killed, and made a special DM power that he called: "+1 d20 die rotation!"


Story Three
We come into a room with a gargoyle that could only be harmed by magic weapons or magic, and 6 orcs. Our monk grapples with the gargoyle for 10 rounds while the wizard and fighter kill the orcs (our paladin tried over and over to help keep the gargoyle pinned down, but epicly failed EVERY ROLL with a 1). The wizard ended up giving the monk +1 fists so that he could attack the gargoyle, and it was finished off with a ray of frost.


The Monkey God
Yet another instance with my brother and his friend, and a cousin of mine. We were doing a standard dungeon crawl with a map, monsters, treasures and traps that were randomly generated, and I was forced to be DM. My brother got bored and started acting like an @$&, so I decided to spice things up, after we got through the first few battles, We decided that we would just run through the place killing everything in sight. Our fighter, having the highest AC, went first. He stepped on a pressure plate that made a 25 ft section of this 5ft hallway swing down, revealing a 40 ft drop; there was a lever on the far side that we could see that would raise the floor again, but it was a 25 ft gap. Being a wizard, my familiar was a monkey, so I had our fighter throw my monkey across this 25 ft pit, where it stood, puzzled. Being DM, I didn't want to make my monkey act uber-smart with an intelligence score of only 6, so, in order to make my monkey pull the lever, we (the players) had to play a little game of... charades. Someone who wasn't playing with us came up with a phrase ("Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, BANANAPHONE!"), I had to make charades to get my monkey (played by our fighter's Player, because he was the dumbest of our players IRL) to guess the phrase. I set a time limit for which he could guess the answer, and we had almost managed it when, suddenly...
Monk: "I get a running start and LEAP OVER THE PIT!!!"
He rolls--you guessed it-- a natural 20. Adding his jump skill of 7 gave him a 27, enough to beat the 25 DC. he cleared the gap and stabilized himself, just as the fighter's player got the phrase and the monkey pulled the lever... The monk and the monkey then dance a little triumphant jig, but the dungeon is not yet half-explored...

Our fighter's next blunder is to burst down a door and take 2d6 (4pts) of fire damage from a flame jet trap, while the harpy in the room rolled for initiative. It started singing and everyone made a will save roll, but our fighter and our paladin failed and were under her control. the fighter gets the first attack and brings the wizard down to zero health, but the monkey gets the next attack and launches itself--not at the harpy, but at the fighter's face. fighter rolls a 1 on a reflex save, and A TINY MONKEY knocks him down to the ground. the battle continues, and the fighter flings my monkey, which lands on the harpy, biting it and killing it.

Story Five

The same group above didn't have a rogue, and we came across magical runes that warned us of a very crude portcullis trap that was not hidden at all, but we couldn't see it, yet. Our monk found during a battle with a bugbear and some orcs, climbed up onto the shoulders of our fighter (the tallest person in our group) and rolled a 20 +7 jump to grab the portcullis and brought it crashing down on the bugbear, killing it.

Story Six

Our same half-orc barbarian was in a village of wicker huts overrun by 20+ orcs. He ran in a straight line through the village... including 8 walls. When he got to a small group of the orcs, including the leader, he slew the leader in one hit and shouted "I AM A DEMON!" he rolled a 20 on his bluff check, added bonuses and scared the crap out of all the orcs, who fled in fear.

Later on in this campaign, my brother (who doesn't have the mental capacity to be intrigued by story-telling, complicated plots and political intrigue) said "I'm tired of this! DM, give me a challenge!" Having put up with his crap all night, the DM teleported him to a room filled to the brim with skeletons. He managed to kill all 20 of the skeletons and only took 6 damage, and he was only level one! He laughed triumphantly and declared "I'm awesome!", but the DM got the last laugh; all of his equipment was destroyed by the fight.

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Melannen
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Melannen » Mon Aug 11, 2008 12:01 am UTC

My favorite one was when I played my level 6 BROWNIE thief (evil).

For those who dont know, my brownie is like a halfling, but is smaller.... much smaller (1ft tall) with modified attacks and whatnot (half of what a halfling's strengths and stuff are).



Okay.

So the scenario goes like this.

Sumomo (me), half-orc barbarian, halfling fighter, dwarf fighter, half-elf mage... blah blah blah.

I had a +6 to my hide ability (w00t!) and pretty much hid whenever I wanted to because I was so damn small. Well, I successfully pulled off 4 sneak-attacks that killed a couple of the buggy enemies (they were just giant bugs) and one human that was riding one of said bugs.

Well, upon killing the bug-riding-human, he immediately fell on top of me... causing me to take 2 damage (thank god for that too lol). I was useless for the entire fight because I kept rolling 1's and 2's whenever I tried to get out from under this extremely heavy human! It wasnt until the barbarian raged and threw the human's body off of me, that I managed to escape and not die w00t!. It was even funnier when the barbarian raged because he got shot in the ass with a flaming arrow that the mage shot and rolled a 1... causing a critical miss that thankfully didnt kill the barbarian! lol

Anywho, we never got anything done in those days... we were always getting into hilarious situations that caused us to stop playing so that we could catch our breaths from laughing! :lol: :lol: :lol:


Same character (Sumomo).

I once ran under a nightmare trying to be brave and kill it... I got trampled, knocked unconscious, and was carried around until I woke up for like half an hour :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby CogDissident » Mon Aug 11, 2008 1:24 pm UTC

Once, I was playing a 15th level 3.5 game of D&D, and the GM had no idea how to scale monsters for the party. We would walk through every fight unscathed, and end up just wasting a lot of time killing mooks who couldn't scratch us. So at one point, me (the druid) and our raptoran (human with wings) fighters decided to go scout ahead, and the gm thought "hey, i'll teach them that my fights are too hard" and we stumbled across a baalor being summoned in the forest.

I thought, well hey, we can take him with a bit of effort, but why not try to end this a funny way instead. "I charge the baalor, Baleful polymorph, trout."

A 1 on a fort save later (he still had his abilities, but eh, whats he going to do?), we flew away and watched the fish slowly suffocate, and then explode. Easiest fight ever.

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ThreeLawsSafe
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby ThreeLawsSafe » Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:18 am UTC

So I'm in the same gaming group as Meteorswarm and last night we had to take out some type of devils/demons/whatevers in a nearby town. As we're waiting outside the chamber where we know these evil dudes are waiting, our rogue decides to modify the door to make to possible for somebody with a somewhat larger body build to smash through the door without opening it. We decide that since my character is the loud and proud warrior of the group, that I should lead the charge. After we prepare for battle, I make an "Oh yeah" roll, get a 26 (+5 for being Orek Von Lichtenstein of the proud line of royal Lichtensteins), and proceed to burst through the door, destroying the wall, bellowing "Ooooooooooooh yeeeaaaah!!"


We managed to get a raised eyebrow from the half angel, half devil guy.
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Moonin
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Moonin » Mon Dec 22, 2008 6:42 am UTC

Alrighty, I suppose I'll tell you guys my story. I had my first match yesterday and it's just so exciting to tell about our. The campaign is called "The Melanese Matters", and is still running [they're having another session tommorow but I won't be there]. Here are our heroes:

Lv. 1 Half-Elf Bard named Moonin [Me]
Lv. 1 Half-Orc Monk named Mook [Aron]
Lv. 1 Halfling named Elaz [Josh]
Lv. 1 Human Cleric [Pelor] name Mikael (sp?) [Jamie]
Lv. 1 Half-Elf Fighter named Fallindor [Patrick]
Lv. 4 NPC Dwarf Fighter named Toklin [DM JC]

There wasn't much dialogue, but I'll recount the events. I am the first to enter a cozy little tavern in an unnamed village, and I notice two huddled men at a corner table, muttering fervently over a dusty, tattered piece of parchment. Idly, my character approaches, which doesn't fool the two men who grunt and move closer inward to hide the parchment. Meanwhile, a large intelligent-looking Half-Orc strides in which a clay jug at his belt and a quartstaff. He sits at the farthest table. A wench and the barkeeper stand behind the table, seeing that they will have buisness today. Our friend Josh walks in, has to make a climb check to get up on a stool. [he's a Tallfellow too] He succeeds, and then a Cleric enters the tavern. The Dwarf grunts to me, asking me why I'm not sitting down. Seeing this as a rude interruption, I place myself in the second nearest seat, barely fooling the Dwarf. Now this is my first time, so I wasn't sure what would I happen when I started singing my Detect Magic spell focused on the parchment. Barkeeper yells "No magic!", Dward and Half-Elf turn to stare and I am embarrassed. I raise my hand for the wench to come over, order a tall ale [odd for any being with Elven heritage], and notice that poor Jamie has failed a Dex check while trying to move to a closer seat, falling flat on his face. Newcomer Josh [first game, doesn't know a single thing about D&D, but it is remarkably well] goes to see if Jamie's okay, and then they begin small talk. Toklin gets into an argument, starts yelling, causes attention and everyone notices... except Mook, who the DM says is picking his nose.

I wave over the wench once more, slipping her 4 gold to spy on the Dwarf and Half-Elf and ask them if they'd like a drink. It seems that Mook, the Half-Orc with his unusually high intelligence has persuaded Toklin and Fallindor to let him sit with them. Wench comes back asking me to pay up for their drinks, which I am taken aback at. Meanwhile, our Halfling friend has asked the wench for a ginger ale on the rocks, stirred. She stirs some ale, cuts up ginger and slaps it in, then walks outside and throws some rocks in it. Barkeeper, who has recently spit ,unbeknownst to anyone but the Half-Orc, into Mook's drink decides that rocks are bad enough. Then he sees that Mr. Stupid-Bard over near the corner can't pay up. So he comes to me, demands money I had before I slipped the wench, then about takes my teeth instead by his fist. Toklin walks over, stops him, and then begins chatting with me. I let something slip about magic, stupidly jug down all my ale, and started puking all over the place... -_- Apparently I am now worthy of seeing the piece of parchment. So everyone involved eventually joins up to be hired on a mission to the "Melanese Manor" for investigation of a man known to be mastered in the works of dark magic.

Ima skip to the manor. I take the lead here, walk up the steps, get my foot stuck after a step breaks, open the door, and then gladly push the Half-Orc ahead of me. The Half-Orc steps in after I cast a Light spell into the room, sees two Orcs on either side of the door, and makes a failed Tumble check in which he ends face first. I fly through the room to his side, and once in notice that the Orcs were statues. I make a Search check, start feeling one up while I stand on it the stone block it's perched on, and end up awakening it by touching the hilt. Friendly Mook successfully grapples me and flings me into the opposite wall before being punched square in the face by the Orc and getting his hands slit as he tries to grapple the blade. I'm a bit weak so I'm out first round, still confused. The whole team finally enters the manor, and the battle begins. Josh the newcomer is extremely lucky, we find out, when he rolls an 8 crit with his crossbow, and I believe another one next round. The Orc dies, and we decide not to mess with the other. After around an hour of searching down the hall we're in, we decide to enter a room with a long table and three secret doors, two of which I notice with Fallindor notices the other. Josh opens the left secret door after I point it out, and is immeadietly attack by a Rost (sp?). Mook steps in, Flurries it to death and then Tumbles the opposite direction of which it falls dead, once more falling on his face. So, we decide to open the right secret door, and what do you know, out comes a little Kobold scared out of its wits. Mook tries to speak with it and ends up having a spear thrown at him. Stupid old me decides to run in after the Kobold, only to be flung back out into Mook by a Half-Fiend. So we kill it, Josh doing another crit with his crossbow. Mook wants revenge on the Kobold, walks in bravely, and is then knocked out by a Lizardfolk's stone. The Lizardfolk dies after Toklin crits it. Fallindor decides to walk in, being thrown out by a Minotaur in a more proper fashion than I. The battle again continues, and I flee instantly to the other side of the room. They kill the Minotaur, and Mook awakes to still want revenge on the Kobold. He takes a piece of ham from an Inn we rested at previously, and tries to lure it out. A poison spear flies out at him, and ends up poisoning him. Lucky Mook. The Kobold then charges out at Mook, and suddenly jumps into a wall. We find it isn't a real wall, and all of the group but me enters through to find a large stone slap surrounded by green ichor, four tables where two mummies lay on two tables, cutting tools on one, and a cut up mummy on the last. I continue to stand guard in the other room, possibly going to be caught by the Necromancer... and this is where we left off and where they'll continue tommorow. ^^

jojaki
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby jojaki » Fri May 22, 2009 2:23 am UTC

ok this is a story about how i ruined our campaign in under 3 hours

Characters
Me: Alilin Half Elf Ranger
Friend 1: Falator Doppleganger(i had just bought him the book for it) Monk
Friend 2: Matthew Half Elf Barbarian
Friend 3: dralator(kinda copied Falator fight lasted 30 min about it) Gnome Rogue

DM:"Ok you start your adventure in a town of medium size"
Me:" O, O can i go first"
DM:" yes"
Me:"i climb up on someones roof and jump down the chimney"
DM:" ok roll to see if u get up"
Roll 20 ^^
DM:"ok u get up but as u jump up a guard comes yelling at u to get down"
Me:" Screw u fatty"
DM:" guards pulls out a crossbow and shoots a rock at you"
Me: so what a stupid rock
DM rolls 20 starts laughing
" you fall off the roof unconcious taking no damage but the guard come and start dragging you away to the guard tower"
Friend:"i attack the guard"

it ends up with us out of jail as we all get locked in except the barabarian shortly after escaping we learn there is a bounty on our heads (dm was tough on us even though it was my second time playing). We then end up getting captured by farmers taken town where we light the guard tower on fire with my clumbsy shot to hit the guard coming in to feed us (earlier we had discovered that the jail cell bars are extremely weak and can be broken by the barabarian now in jail with us)

As i roll to hit the guard
Dice down the table 1!!!
so i get to roll again our DM said if i could get a 20 he would make it kill the guard
next roll 1!!!
DM starts laughing

Me:"so what i miss the guard"
DM:" not only that you knocked the torch off the wall onto the rug"
Whole Group: " Great going asshole you just killed all of us"
Me:" who cares maybe the guard will save us"
DM:"as you look up the guard is running out of the tower
Me:" !@#$ Matthew break the bars"
Matthew rolls 1 again 20 again 10
our dm laughs ok you break through bars but smashing the bars to hard you fly into the fire
Me:"ok i go to try and pull matthew out of the fire"
Friend 1 and 3 :"screw that i'm running
Me and Matthew then perish in the fire as when i try to reach for him i fall in
My friends soon die while running out of the tower they run on to the path and get trampled by horses

So ya fun day bad ending :D

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Amnesiasoft
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Amnesiasoft » Sat May 23, 2009 5:37 am UTC

My friends and I finally started our VERY FIRST EVAR GAME of D&D...

We encountered 6 Goblins (Well, 5 and 1 Hobgoblin, but we didn't know that. The DM later realized that was supposed to be 3 goblins, not 6). I was flanking the "totally pimped out" Goblin with our Cleric. Our Cleric proceed to attack with a morning star, and manages to decapitate the Hobgoblin. My turn comes around, and with the head being at my feet, I decide to...improvise...and throw the Goblin head at another goblin. After a successful roll of 17 (+2 Dex, -4 Improv), I succesfully hit the goblin...for 1 damage. Follow this up with a successful Intimidation check, and I manage to freak the Goblin out so badly he starts running away from us. On my next turn, I rush after him, not willing to let him run off. Too bad one of the other goblins snuck up behind me and beat my face in, I then sat for the rest of the battle bleeding profusely, by the time our cleric gets to me, we go through 6 stablization checks, and 6 first aid attempts before we manage to stabalize me...

...That was awesome :P

Our campaign is not quite serious...especially when my backstory is something along the lines of this:

Spoiler:
Met Jamgretor at an IDOP, Interplanar Dungeon of Pancakes, for the 67th Semi-Annual Walt Swinebutcher Interplanar Bacon Eating Championship. After losing to Jamgretor Battleheart, Carsaadi swore revenge upon him, declaring she would never allow him to eat bacon again, and steal the Baconeater Belt from him at all costs.

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TaintedDeity
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby TaintedDeity » Mon May 25, 2009 8:28 pm UTC

So? The cleric obviously hit the hobgoblin really hard.
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d0nk3y_k0n9
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby d0nk3y_k0n9 » Mon May 25, 2009 8:43 pm UTC

Meteorswarm wrote:
Amnesiasoft wrote:Our Cleric proceed to attack with a morning star, and manages to decapitate the Hobgoblin.


I don't think your DM quite knows what a morning star is.


Clearly, you've never seen someone be decapitated by blunt trauma. It isn't pretty.

Spoiler:
Note: I've never actually seen someone get they're head smashed in/off. I'm just being facetious.

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Jesse
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Jesse » Mon May 25, 2009 10:16 pm UTC


jojaki
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby jojaki » Tue May 26, 2009 1:09 am UTC

Meteorswarm wrote:
Amnesiasoft wrote:Our Cleric proceed to attack with a morning star, and manages to decapitate the Hobgoblin.


I don't think your DM quite knows what a morning star is.


anything can be used to decapitate someone just with a morning star there would have to be alot of force put into it

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SecondTalon
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby SecondTalon » Tue May 26, 2009 3:06 am UTC

But only for a very broad definition of decapitation. A head ceasing to be is not the same thing as a head being cut off, even though the results are essentially the same.
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Sir_Elderberry » Tue May 26, 2009 3:30 am UTC

So, I played my first 4e mod today. Lasted way too long (nobody had played much 4e before.) Last encounter, we were fighting in this room that filled up with this silvery stuff. If you were standing in it, you took an attack vs AC (+4 or so I think) for 1d6 + roughly 3 iirc, as well as being slowed (4e addendum: That means, you can only move two squares.) Myself, a warlord, and the rest of the party except for a cowardly cleric who was out of heals, charged into it regardless, to go kill the last remaining enemy. They do so, and retreat back, expecting the trap to die off now that the mobs are dead. (It doesn't.) I'm left with myself behind enemy lines and slowed and an unconscious, stabilized Avenger or something (must read PHB2 sometime)

With one hitpoint.

So I do my warlord thing and hoist him over my shoulders, move two squares, and attack the central fountain-thing, since that seemed to be the most obvious way to disable the trap. (Our DM said that if anyone had had Arcana, Thievery, or Dungeoneering, we would have been able to do this much easier. We, uh, we have had to restructure our balance a bit in light of this encounter.) I get missed three times in a row in the course of walking up to him, picking him up, and attacking it twice. I'm feeling very heroic and very close to death. Suddenly, and I realize two things:

1)Hey, I haven't used Second Wind yet.
2)Hey, I've only used my heal once this encounter.
3)Everyone has used an Action Point in this battle. Interesting. Hey, aren't they supposed to get hit points from my Inspiring Presence?

In other news, Elderberry makes a poor Warlord at 2am. But I'm switching to wizard. (And I did destroy that fountain, escape alive, and save my friend, so.)
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby d0nk3y_k0n9 » Tue May 26, 2009 10:52 am UTC

SecondTalon wrote:But only for a very broad definition of decapitation. A head ceasing to be is not the same thing as a head being cut off, even though the results are essentially the same.


I still think that if you hit it hard enough at the right angle, you could conceivably get it to fly off.

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Amnesiasoft
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Amnesiasoft » Tue May 26, 2009 12:03 pm UTC

Well, I have kicked people's heads off in Fable...if that counts for anything...

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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Xaddak » Tue May 26, 2009 12:14 pm UTC

And I'm sure a lot of us have exploded entire bodies in Fallout 3 with a single bullet.

Can we just put it down to "game physics, even in D&D, are unrealistic" and leave it at that?
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Tommy2995 » Sat Jun 06, 2009 12:05 pm UTC

I was in a game where somebody took their prejudice complication too far. He was a priest who hated fat people.

Our party was on their way a very large city, where there would be loads to do. As we got to the gate a guard stopped us to take our weapons. Unfortunately, this guard was a little on the chubby side, so our friend the priest smacked him in nose. The other guards tried to arrest him. He was rapidly losing health. Then, another party member had a credo to "defend the weak", so he attacked the guards too. Then the rest of the party attacked the guards except me. We were all banned from the city except my character (My character's a thief).
I am Dave! Yognaught and I have the balls!

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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Sir_Elderberry » Sun Jun 14, 2009 3:17 am UTC

So, fourth edition, party of level 1-2. I'm an Eladrin wizard with the wand specialization. We're fighting in a theater, the encounter starts with me in the middle of the seats. Shadow creatures burst in from either side and beat up me. Round two is spent teleporting to the balcony. While myself, the paladin, and the warden take on the shadow creatures down below, the ranger and druid work on the cultist priest hanging out on the stage, who eventually runs behind a curtain.

So, now everything in the regular area is dead, and it's my turn. My teleport is gone, so I ask what it is to jump down from the balcony rather than take the stairs (an entire round spent not getting me closer to killing things). DC 15 acrobatics. Well, it just so happens that I have +3 dex, so I can roll an eleven and make it. Except I roll a four. So I fall flat on my face, take a d10, spend my standard action standing up, and meanwhile the fight progresses behind the curtain. Actually, the guy starts opening an escape hatch he apparently had prepared, but he's in a tight spot. Somebody gets back there and grapples him, but nobody else can get in melee range or they're still moving behind the curtain.

So now it's my turn, and I decide to unload. First, I use a move action to get up on the stage--DC 12 athletics to jump up there. I have -1 STR, so no net penalty or bonus. I roll a nineteen. Take another move action to move behind the curtain where I can see the cultist. Spend action point. Use encounter power (Force Orb). Use encounter wand power (+Dex to attack roll). This attack is at +10. I roll a 20, crit for 21 damage, and the DM reveals that he had 19 hit points left.

That's right. Don't you try and run from my combat.
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I reiterate. Coolest. Guy.

Well. You heard him.

Heisenberg
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Heisenberg » Mon Jun 15, 2009 6:55 pm UTC

Near the end of a long campaign, my group decides to knock over a town of uppity merchants, only to encounter their Guard Tarrasque. Our fighter and cleric, being arrogant bastards, run in and start swinging. The Tarrasque goes before me and takes a half dozen attacks, dealing seventy-some damage and swallowing one of them.

I look at the stats of my halfling sorcerer and see 53 hit points and no AC to speak of. I think I should put some distance between me and those fangs, so I dim door to the only safe place: inside the Tarrasque. I figure I was going to end up there anyway, so why bother with the painful interim?

So I began blasting holes in the thing and refusing to leave while only taking minor damage from its gullet. Every once in a while the cleric would pop in and heal me up before cutting himself out again (Oh hi, how's the fight going?). Definitely threw our GM for a loop. :)

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Sir-Taco
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Sir-Taco » Fri Jun 19, 2009 3:19 pm UTC

Speaking of decapitation, there was a time with my friends where a small town got raided by ten orcs, we had no healer because he was gone that night. Nearly a disaster, yet chance came into play, critical misses galore, one decapitated himself and another knocked himself out. I managed to do on the fly negotiations with the local general store, getting quite a few potions and scrolls "pleading for necessity". Then we promptly left the town to burn. Yeah, praying to our gods never went well in that game.

We were using 3.5, I don't own it but I plan on getting 4ed, its not all that bad is it? Or is all the angst over 3.5vs4 over now?
The world is a cold and dark place, so start fire.

Random832
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Random832 » Fri Jun 19, 2009 4:40 pm UTC

Heisenberg wrote:Near the end of a long campaign, my group decides to knock over a town of uppity merchants, only to encounter their Guard Tarrasque.
:shock:
Definitely threw our GM for a loop. :)


His own fault for writing a Tarrasque as a guard animal - Wouldn't it, you know, eat the town?

And how were you taking "minor" damage from its 4d8+14 digestive tract? I guess it's safer than the bite, mostly because it doesn't have a critical range, but you'd still have to be healed almost every round.

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Feddlefew
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Feddlefew » Mon Jun 22, 2009 8:57 pm UTC

Three of our house rules that have amused my D&D group to no end:

- People on fire get a +2 bonus on intimidate checks. It came about when Thok the Brilliant Barbarian (He had no rolls less than twelve.), having been ignited by a combination of falling into a keg and then being hit by a fireball, attempted to force the evil wizard's minions to flee. Now, picture a raging, drunk, 7'+ barbarian with a double ax, threatening to do all kinds of horrific things to you. While on fire.

He rolled 19, and with all of his bonuses he had a 30. We never did here from that wizard again.

- Gnomes can I identify potions by sniffing them. My Gnome wizard, Feddlefew, was captured not once, but twice, in the same campaign, by polymorphed Illithids asking her to Identify bottles of chloroform.

- As a joke we determine handedness with a D20 during character creation. 1-14 is right handed, 15-19 is left handed, and a 20 is ambidextrous. So fare, the only person to ever get a 20 was the druid Thomas with a strength score of -3.

-----

Also:

Druid: "I cast Good Berry!"
*Druid rolls 3 natural ones in a row.*
Druid: "Oh no! Critical failure! what happens now?!"
DM: "Oh no! The Good Berries have become BAD Berries! They're burrowing under your skin, moving towards your heart inch by agonizing inch! Make fort save..."
Druid: "Wait, like scarrabs?"
DM: "Yep."
Druid: "AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
My spelling is abysmal. Just saying.

brodieboy255
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby brodieboy255 » Sat Jun 27, 2009 11:45 am UTC

So we're raiding a Kobold and have just fallen down a trap. I (the cleric) have just revived the wizard, who was reduced below zero hitpoints despite being the only one with a Safewing emblem (A falling rock hit him on the head). We enter the next part of the cave, all making spot checks. I roll 21
DM: You see a sort of shimmering shape in the corner, kind of murky like muddy water.
Me: Is there any rubble around?
DM: Yes
Me: I pick up a rock and throw it at the shimmery thing.
DM: You'll have to make an attack roll
Me: <rolls natural 20>
DM: Roll to confirm
Me: <rolls another natural 20>
DM: Roll to confirm again
Me: <rolls an 11>
DM: Okay, you just dealt 14 damage to an NPC that no-one else can see. With a rock.

The best thing about this was that it was the first time I had ever used any kind of ranged attack, and that I also had the spell Magic Stones prepared, but this did more damage (Magic stones can do max damage 7 with a single throw)

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Maseiken
The Candylawyer
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Maseiken » Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:49 pm UTC

Sir-Taco wrote:Speaking of decapitation, there was a time with my friends where a small town got raided by ten orcs, we had no healer because he was gone that night. Nearly a disaster, yet chance came into play, critical misses galore, one decapitated himself and another knocked himself out. I managed to do on the fly negotiations with the local general store, getting quite a few potions and scrolls "pleading for necessity". Then we promptly left the town to burn. Yeah, praying to our gods never went well in that game.

We were using 3.5, I don't own it but I plan on getting 4ed, its not all that bad is it? Or is all the angst over 3.5vs4 over now?

It's mostly over, 4e is good fun. Personally I prefer 3.5's structural complexity, but that's because I hate things I like being accesible to other people.

At least I think that's why it is.
"GRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOWR!!!!"
(Translation: "Objection!")

Maseiken had the ball at the top of the key...

d0nk3y_k0n9
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby d0nk3y_k0n9 » Sat Jul 04, 2009 9:15 pm UTC

Does anyone have a problem with expanding this to be a thread of interesting tabletop RPG stories instead of just D&D? I have some really, really funny and amazing stories from a recent (actually, ongoing) game of Vampire with some friends that I'd love to share but I'm not sure if this is the right place to put them. If it's okay, then I'll go ahead and edit this post to add the story.

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The Sleeping Tyrant
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby The Sleeping Tyrant » Sat Jul 04, 2009 9:56 pm UTC

Right now, I'm playing in a high-power 3.5 campaign in Eberron.
So, we started our last session at level 3 in Sharn. We did some shopping, then hopped on a boat to Xendrik because we had a whole bunch of clues pointing to Xendrik being where we could find some thing we're supposed to find (we're not quite sure what it is yet, just that it's pretty damn important).

So, half a month passes uneventfully. Until the boat gets attacked. By 53 CR 2 monsters that have the ability to join hands, charge up electricity and unleash lightning bolts.

So, they start climbing the side of the boat. Our ninja is hitting them with shuriken and killing a few. Not enough to stop them from climbing up.
I have no ranged weapons to speak of (I'm keeping an extra greataxe just to throw, but I wasn't about to throw it off the side of the boat). So, I wait. Until they're starting to come on board and completely surrounding us.

Then we proceeded to slaughter all 53. The end tally: the ninja killed 15, my barbarian killed 9, the artificer killed 22 (scrolls of icestorm and fireball. Yeah, he fireballed the boat.), the GM killed 8 of his own monsters. I end the fight with 0 HP (down from 61). The ninja has 5. The artificer is somewhere in the negatives.

We gained 2 levels right there.

Rakysh
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Rakysh » Sun Jul 05, 2009 5:47 am UTC

d0nk3y_k0n9 wrote:Does anyone have a problem with expanding this to be a thread of interesting tabletop RPG stories instead of just D&D? I have some really, really funny and amazing stories from a recent (actually, ongoing) game of Vampire with some friends that I'd love to share but I'm not sure if this is the right place to put them. If it's okay, then I'll go ahead and edit this post to add the story.


SexyTalon can correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm fairly sure you'll be fine.

d0nk3y_k0n9
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby d0nk3y_k0n9 » Sun Jul 05, 2009 1:04 pm UTC

Rakysh wrote:SexyTalon can correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm fairly sure you'll be fine.


Cool.

So we were playing a game of Vampire: The Masquerade (actually, I was just watching), and this one guy has gone through 3 characters in 3 nights of play already. The first night, it's decided that for some reason, the blind girl (played by Sam) is going to drive instead of the guy who actually owns the car (played by Andrew). Of course, being blind, Sam crashes the car, angering Andrew and sending him into a frenzy. Andrew draws his Katana and starts taking swings at Ivan, who promptly sprouts claws to defend himself, breaking the Masquerade in the process. Andrew ends up killing Dan in his frenzy before regaining control of himself. Ivan, Andrew, and Matt start running around killing all of the witnesses so that they won't be hunted for breaking the Masquerade, while Sam, who didn't participate in the fight, sneaks away unnoticed. As they are leaving, one of them looks up and notices that a traffic camera has recorded the entire incident.

The next night, Matt and Dan (who has a new character) sneak in to steal the tape from the traffic camera. They are fairly successful, but Matt drives off without Dan. Dan is stuck without any means of transportation with dawn rapidly approaching. He decides to hop into a taxi and try to get back to their base of operations (a nightclub owned by Sam). Of course, he doesn't make it in time and starts taking damage from the sunlight. He dives out of the moving taxi and starts running towards the nearest building. On his way there, he trips and falls. As he's standing back up, he bursts into flames and burns to death.

The third night, Dan, getting tired of dying and doing nothing else, decides that he wants to go kill people. So he walks up to a random group of teenagers and offers them candy. They, creeped out, run away. He gets pissed off and throws several tomahawks at them, missing every time. They call the police and Dan gets arrested. Dan is now stuck in a jail cell with a window and is very, very fearful of the sunlight that might come in soon. So he tries to call the guard over so he can kill him and take the keys. Naturally, the guard isn't stupid. So Dan hangs himself (this isn't lethal to a vampire) and eventually the guard notices. Dan is cut down and appears dead, since vampires have no pulse, don't need to breathe, and are cold to the touch, so he gets put into the morgue. A little while later, he breaks out of the morgue and escapes out a fire door. He then goes to Sam's nightclub, where Andrew, the only one whose character watches the news (which had a headline of "Pedophile Assaults Teens" with a video of Dan's arrest), notices him and calls the cops. Dan walks up to Andrew and asks, "Who're you calling?" Andrew responds, "My mother. Leave me alone," and then proceeds to fail his bluff check. Thus, Dan swings a tomahawk at Andrew's head, trying to kill him. Andrew activates celerity, taking four rounds worth of actions in the next round and putting Dan at 1 hp away from dead. Sam then sneaks up and, unnoticed, drags Dan's unconscious body into the basement and diablerises it.

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Maseiken
The Candylawyer
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby Maseiken » Mon Jul 06, 2009 12:21 am UTC

So I've been playing my first campaign of Scion for the past few weeks, my character is a Scion of Sun Wukong (or "The GREAT SAGE, EQUAL TO HEAVEN, or... Monkey). Which is, you know, cool and pretty standard... Except that he's an Irish Bravo with a penchant for pubs and a newly acquired "Flask of Eternal merriment" capable of refilling itself. This, along with the Obligatory Holy Staff (Henceforth referred to as OHS, or Occupational Health and Safety), makes a very fun character.

Spoiler:
Second session (When I joined in), Dylan O'Hanlon (For 'tis his name), wakes up in the county Drunk-Tank, having had his visitation from his patron deity over the past few days, taking the form of an extended bender, carrying him from Dublin, his hometown, all the way to Cherry Hills Colorado. He has no memory of how this happened. Upon being bailed out by a mysterious figure, he finds, amongst his sundry posessions, a cheque for 2.5 billion dollars. He later uses this to join the country club the band is palnning to investigate, declaring at the same time, that he is, in fact a "RICH BITCH".


Spoiler:
Fourth session in, we get chased by a Lord of the Fenrir (read, astronomically out of our league), after having royally screwed up the terms of the agreement which guaranteed our safety.
This translates to a high-speed chase down the highway, between a SWAT van filled with fledgling Scion's, and a giant, rampaging, God of Wolves.
After another of the band leaps heroically out of the van, attacking the wolf, Dylan shrugs ad does likewise, using his OHS to essentially pole vault over the beast, using its neck as a pivot point.

The most surprising thing? We actually beat it, thanks to a) several ridiculously overpowered shots from our resident Socialite's Winchester rifle and b), the dumb thing not thinking of actually using it's incredible Regeneration power until it was too late (Probably due to GM fudging, but man was it fun...)


Scion is lots of fun.
"GRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOWR!!!!"
(Translation: "Objection!")

Maseiken had the ball at the top of the key...

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SummerGlauFan
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Re: Interesting D&D Stories

Postby SummerGlauFan » Mon Jul 06, 2009 1:48 am UTC

Our group was trying to get access to a set of documents in a safe in the office of a trading post's administrator, who is a woman (this is important). We did not want to risk breaking into the room, as we still needed to be on good terms with them. So, we decided to try and seduce her. Before we could get there, a series of Bad Things happened to us, and the only ones able to get to the trading post were the two women in our group (also played by women). One of them decides to try the seduction tactic, and succeeds to such a degree that the administrator invites her up to her room immediately.

So, she had to role-play a sex scene. It was hilarious, and in my humble opinion the best session we had. :)
glasnt wrote:"As she raised her rifle against the creature, her hair fluttered beneath the red florescent lighting of the locked down building.

I knew from that moment that she was something special"


Outbreak, a tale of love and zombies.

In stores now.


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